FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Would what we want put you off us?
Would what we want put you off us?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So we are a married couple who have no interest in full swap or soft swap, we do however enjoy having sex in front of people and seeing people have sex in front of us. My wife is also bisexual and does play with the female of the couple or a single female.. we are very straight with people very early on into conversations that this is what we are after, and they are happy to agree, but as we progress in conversation and suggestions are made about sucking cock and we again say that's not for us, conversation then stops dead, I understand that most people would suggest that we aren't proper swingers and that we probably shouldn't be on a site like this, but where else could we kind of be ourselves and my wife find women who are into casual play. So I guess where I'm trying to go with this is, would what we are after put a lot of people off? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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There probably isn't, my mind is probably just running away with me for the fact that we don't do (from what I have seen) what majority of the people who swing do participate in. |
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By *ack688Man
over a year ago
abruzzo Italy (and UK) |
There seems to be enough forum posts about guys asking if couples like to have a guy jerk themselves off while watching them have sex so there’s certainly space in here for what you want. Maybe you are more exhibitionists than swingers but I’m sure you will find people who want to play along. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally what your offering isn’t for me I would only meet for full swap, but there are so many varieties of swinging and it’s a very personal thing. You can only offer what your comfortable with I’m sure your not the only ones with these limits |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lots of people here are apparently not doing what they're supposed to do. I've been told I'm on the wrong site more than once.  Make it work for you and your needs, and if people don't pay attention they're not people you want to meet. |
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Well if you are honest and upfront about what you like/enjoy there shouldn't any problems and it's the other parties who have the problem ?? we also enjoy so called "Soft play" between the females and if couples can't accept it we just move on and nothing more enjoyable than seeing 2 females enjoying themselves and the problem we have encountered numerous times is with a couple agreeing and then the male half starts issuing order/directing or tries joining in ?? and mrs4 has more than a few times just stopped and dressed and we've left but best of luck and have fun and don't ever do anything neither of you aren't comfortable with xx |
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Each to their own. When you get into sexual kinks and fantasies, everyone is moulded differently. All you have to do is go on any porn website and see how many different categories there are catering for different tastes and needs. You like what you like and if someone else doesn't then you both move on. If you set out your stall then people are under no illusions and shouldn't be upset if what they want further down the line doesn't tally. |
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There is something for everyone on here.
Voyeurism is a quite a popular kink.
We arnt looking for full swap with another couple. Just a female at this point.
We get thats not everybody's taste...but thats the great thing about this site. Lots of variety. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So we are a married couple who have no interest in full swap or soft swap, we do however enjoy having sex in front of people and seeing people have sex in front of us. My wife is also bisexual and does play with the female of the couple or a single female.. we are very straight with people very early on into conversations that this is what we are after, and they are happy to agree, but as we progress in conversation and suggestions are made about sucking cock and we again say that's not for us, conversation then stops dead, I understand that most people would suggest that we aren't proper swingers and that we probably shouldn't be on a site like this, but where else could we kind of be ourselves and my wife find women who are into casual play. So I guess where I'm trying to go with this is, would what we are after put a lot of people off? "
nope, you teo are exactly like myself and my mrs, we dont do full swap or soft swap. i love watching her play with girls and she loves it too, we are voyeurs and like to watch too, it turns us on. There are many jjust like you, just gotta find them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a single M I'm not your target audience but I'll add on to the positive reinforcement 
You are definitely still in the right place. You both know what you want and what you're looking for which is excellent and if people are not into it then it's matter of searching more 
I wish you 2 the best of luck out here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There seems to be enough forum posts about guys asking if couples like to have a guy jerk themselves off while watching them have sex so there’s certainly space in here for what you want. Maybe you are more exhibitionists than swingers but I’m sure you will find people who want to play along."
Thank you for the response, I see where you're coming from with exhibitionism, but... there are plenty of male/female couples on here where only the female half plays but with men, and the husband enjoys watching but doesn't want to be involved. These are classed as swingers. I enjoy the exact same thing, the only difference is I enjoy watching her play with another female... but because there isn't a male involved, we are vlassex as exhibitionists and not swingers, why is that? |
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By *he LsCouple
over a year ago
East Midlands |
"There seems to be enough forum posts about guys asking if couples like to have a guy jerk themselves off while watching them have sex so there’s certainly space in here for what you want. Maybe you are more exhibitionists than swingers but I’m sure you will find people who want to play along.
Thank you for the response, I see where you're coming from with exhibitionism, but... there are plenty of male/female couples on here where only the female half plays but with men, and the husband enjoys watching but doesn't want to be involved. These are classed as swingers. I enjoy the exact same thing, the only difference is I enjoy watching her play with another female... but because there isn't a male involved, we are vlassex as exhibitionists and not swingers, why is that? "
Have you guys tried club's, most have open play areas and if you go on couples/single lady only nights you get to play in front of other and watch. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've had fun that way several times before where its just the two ladies playing with each other, whilst the gents are just being with their own partner!
Swinging covers such a huge variety of options that some will like you and some won't. Don't worry about those that don't, and enjoy being with those that are like-minded.
Hope you find what you're looking for! X
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a single guy who wouldn't get to play I would have no interest. Not just in you personally but in only being a voyeur in general.
However there are plenty who would love to watch or be watched im sure, but for me it's not my thing. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There seems to be enough forum posts about guys asking if couples like to have a guy jerk themselves off while watching them have sex so there’s certainly space in here for what you want. Maybe you are more exhibitionists than swingers but I’m sure you will find people who want to play along.
Thank you for the response, I see where you're coming from with exhibitionism, but... there are plenty of male/female couples on here where only the female half plays but with men, and the husband enjoys watching but doesn't want to be involved. These are classed as swingers. I enjoy the exact same thing, the only difference is I enjoy watching her play with another female... but because there isn't a male involved, we are vlassex as exhibitionists and not swingers, why is that?
Have you guys tried club's, most have open play areas and if you go on couples/single lady only nights you get to play in front of other and watch. "
Hey, yeah we are members at 2 clubs |
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Definitely not a put off - your openness and honesty early on and up front does quite the opposite and would make us want to engage more. Everybody’s looking for their own thing on here and sure they’ll be loads more people who want a similar interaction (and plenty who don’t).
I wouldn’t say you’re on the wrong site for such a request. Have you been to any clubs - seems an ideal scenario to play out. The only watch out would be to make sure the couple you’re meeting / interacting with completely understand where you stand and that won’t suddenly change…but nice, genuine people (as we’ve met) will be fine.
xxx |
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"There seems to be enough forum posts about guys asking if couples like to have a guy jerk themselves off while watching them have sex so there’s certainly space in here for what you want. Maybe you are more exhibitionists than swingers but I’m sure you will find people who want to play along.
Thank you for the response, I see where you're coming from with exhibitionism, but... there are plenty of male/female couples on here where only the female half plays but with men, and the husband enjoys watching but doesn't want to be involved. These are classed as swingers. I enjoy the exact same thing, the only difference is I enjoy watching her play with another female... but because there isn't a male involved, we are vlassex as exhibitionists and not swingers, why is that? "
I think you need to take this issue to the world swingers forum to see if they can reclassify you as swingers.
We each have our own personal views on what is or is not a swinger. But actually there is no strict policing of this.
So it may just be that you have spoken to many people who do not class you as swingers by their own standards. It's not binding and don't worry the swinging police will not be knocking on your door to remove your swinging licence any swinging sex toys like a double ended dildo.
Having said all that as with all sexual activities the more prescriptive you are then the less choice you will have available to you. This is not a bad thing but just a statement of fact.
Equally whilst there is not a set of standards for swinging you will find that on a swinging site you will have a certain level of expectations amongst the people there.
It does not mean you are in the wrong place it just makes it harder for you to find what you want.
A bit like going to a shop that sells clothes but you have a specific type of garment you are looking for.
Like any other aspect of society thus site is no different so you will get your saints and sinners and a whole range in between so yes you will get liars and con artists, the difference is they are conning you over sex rather than you needing to get your guttering replaced. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you for all your responses, it wasn't the label we were after, we were looking into whether we were actually in the right place for what we want or not, describing us as one thing only puts in our mind that we was not in the right place. All of your comments whether sarcastic or not have led us to believe that we are. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
Your rules but clearly the people you are talking to don't want that. You just have to keep looking there are plenty who are into voyeurism you just have to keep looking.
You also have to accept that many on here are not looking for the same thing as yourself and therefore it may be harder to find. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So we are a married couple who have no interest in full swap or soft swap, we do however enjoy having sex in front of people and seeing people have sex in front of us. My wife is also bisexual and does play with the female of the couple or a single female.. we are very straight with people very early on into conversations that this is what we are after, and they are happy to agree, but as we progress in conversation and suggestions are made about sucking cock and we again say that's not for us, conversation then stops dead, I understand that most people would suggest that we aren't proper swingers and that we probably shouldn't be on a site like this, but where else could we kind of be ourselves and my wife find women who are into casual play. So I guess where I'm trying to go with this is, would what we are after put a lot of people off? "
Been looking for a this scenario for ages. |
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They'll definitely be some like minded people on here & at clubs there are usually couples playing with an open door for others to watch, which might suit you and help you find like minded couples
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
It won't be for all, it wouldn't be for me, but I'm sure there are people who also enjoy this, it's finding them.
As long as you're upfront and clear about what you're seeking, I don't see an issue. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
We aren’t proper swingers either in so much as the Mrs isn’t interested in swapping with another man, and what we are looking for is quite niche, so I wouldn’t worry about labels. Just stick to what you are looking for and don’t compromise unless you want to.
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Everyone comes on here looking for their own sexual fantasies or desires. Each are individual and maybe only shared by a few other people or the majority of swingers on this site.
No matter what, you shouldn’t be criticised for what you’re looking for and hopefully one day find.
Good luck and happy Fabbing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So we are a married couple who have no interest in full swap or soft swap, we do however enjoy having sex in front of people and seeing people have sex in front of us. My wife is also bisexual and does play with the female of the couple or a single female.. we are very straight with people very early on into conversations that this is what we are after, and they are happy to agree, but as we progress in conversation and suggestions are made about sucking cock and we again say that's not for us, conversation then stops dead, I understand that most people would suggest that we aren't proper swingers and that we probably shouldn't be on a site like this, but where else could we kind of be ourselves and my wife find women who are into casual play. So I guess where I'm trying to go with this is, would what we are after put a lot of people off? "
Just take yourselves to a club in a voyeur room and go wild with each other, it’s up to you who your both willing to play with, personally your criteria doesn’t fit ours but there will be people out there that are ok with it |
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"So we are a married couple who have no interest in full swap or soft swap, we do however enjoy having sex in front of people and seeing people have sex in front of us. My wife is also bisexual and does play with the female of the couple or a single female.. we are very straight with people very early on into conversations that this is what we are after, and they are happy to agree, but as we progress in conversation and suggestions are made about sucking cock and we again say that's not for us, conversation then stops dead, I understand that most people would suggest that we aren't proper swingers and that we probably shouldn't be on a site like this, but where else could we kind of be ourselves and my wife find women who are into casual play. So I guess where I'm trying to go with this is, would what we are after put a lot of people off? "
Can we still watch you play with each other? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So we are a married couple who have no interest in full swap or soft swap, we do however enjoy having sex in front of people and seeing people have sex in front of us. My wife is also bisexual and does play with the female of the couple or a single female.. we are very straight with people very early on into conversations that this is what we are after, and they are happy to agree, but as we progress in conversation and suggestions are made about sucking cock and we again say that's not for us, conversation then stops dead, I understand that most people would suggest that we aren't proper swingers and that we probably shouldn't be on a site like this, but where else could we kind of be ourselves and my wife find women who are into casual play. So I guess where I'm trying to go with this is, would what we are after put a lot of people off? "
I’m guessing those that suggested you’re not proper swingers we’re just peeved that you wouldn’t do what they wanted. Lots of couples like ff as a lead up to own partner fun x … I think you’re on the right site x |
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We are a watch and be watched couple. So far we've met a guy and played while he wanked but ideally we'd like to meet couples for same room no swap. MAYBE some soft play with the right couple lol but we dont swap. |
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