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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As the heading says, I went on a vanilla date today as I feel I would now like to have someone in my life or at least try to.
What a contrast, really after having meets with wonderful people on here it felt so long and drawn out. I kept conversation flowing but really I just felt like her therapist. Not giving up though just not another date with that lady. Anyone else experienced similar after being on here ? |
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Before Mrs Misfit I dated on vanilla sites and done the whole causal hook up thing and found things in between the two. Enjoyed it all with the only goal being take things as they come and finding what works. Learnt a lot, had lots of great times and likewise some awkward and bizarre experiences. Its quite an adventure. I have dates like you've described. You take the rough with the smooth and keep an open mind. I'd say just explore and enjoy. Just be open and honest with who you encounter and don't mess anyone about.
Since you are on here what are your feelings regarding swinging in a relationship? Is it a no, like to have or must have? Especially if its a must have this could be an obstacle because most people aren't swingers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends on the person I guess. Pretty sure there are plenty of non-sexual interests you have, which someone else shares. If you find that person, the conversation usually keeps flowing. I have had my share of good and bad dates. But my kinky side stops me from letting it go any further. |
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By *ack688Man
over a year ago
abruzzo Italy (and UK) |
I’m not really sure I could go back to vanilla dating, having been in vanilla relationships and knowing that swinging, or at least being open or poly is always going to be something I want, I can’t see the point of progressing anything with someone who isn’t going to also want those kind of things |
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I love to vanilla date and don’t wanna be single forever lol… until it comes to sex lol.
Not sure why but there seems to be much more confidence with meets compared to dates!
Usually already know what each other is into, probably seen each other naked already… just seems so much for fun and chilled! |
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I very much doubt I'll have another vanilla relationship. I'd love to have a partner who enjoys swinging but it would have to work for both of us on so many levels that it's very unlikely it'll ever happen.
Never say never though, and I'm old enough to realize that life is full of surprises.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is the problem I'm having. I want a relationship but don't want vanilla. I met my ex husband on here so maybe there will be another guy out there for me. |
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The thing is, if having sex is your hobby, what better way to find someone for a long term relationship than by finding someone who shares a similar interest? Find a swinger and then there are no taboos and secrets and you probably have more than you've ever had. |
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I've been on a vanilla date with a forumite.
Despite having chatted on fab previously, we met through the fishy site.
So rather than seeing if there was a sexual attraction, we were looking to see if we were interested in longer term.
Sadly we didn't become a couple.
Sex is (relatively) easy.
I don't care if my partner enjoys watching football or 'love island'
Finding a partner to spend non-sexy time with (as well as sexy time, obvs) is more challenging. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Since you are on here what are your feelings regarding swinging in a relationship? Is it a no, like to have or must have? Especially if its a must have this could be an obstacle because most people aren't swingers."
That's the thing, I really do love and enjoy this lifestyle. Its a difficult one really, I've been single for nearly 5 years now due to a marriage breakup and ensuring I did right by my children first and foremost. So I put myself and my wants/needs aside. Now 5 years on i want to get a little more in my life and I find myself questioning if/when I do find a partner and if they are not into swinging am I always going to be left wanting.  |
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