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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Seen loads of 'married' threads....But what if a person is separated?
Perhaps they still live in the same house as their spouse but for all intents and purposes they are now separated and no longer 'married'. They stay in the same house because they can't afford to live apart.
What if the person no longer lives in the same house as their spouse, (separated) but haven't yet got a divorce?
What if they live in different houses and will never get a divorce due to financial reasons?
Are separated people still thought of as 'married' and therefore people avoid them, or would the above scenario's make people more likely to meet them? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The irony is that if a woman was to say she was married on here, she still would be inundated with messages for a meet. However, if there is a man in the same situation, 9 times out of ten, he would be shunned because he would be considered as a cheater. Go figure  |
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"Seen loads of 'married' threads....But what if a person is separated?
Perhaps they still live in the same house as their spouse but for all intents and purposes they are now separated and no longer 'married'. They stay in the same house because they can't afford to live apart.
What if the person no longer lives in the same house as their spouse, (separated) but haven't yet got a divorce?
What if they live in different houses and will never get a divorce due to financial reasons?
Are separated people still thought of as 'married' and therefore people avoid them, or would the above scenario's make people more likely to meet them?"
Separated and divorcing (and NO chance or getting back together - neither of us wants to!) and not living together, but still technically married. Am on here as single, but state on profile my situation - I leave it for others to make up their own minds.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hah, trust me, it doesn't get any better for single guys either. I have a decent job, car and my own house, I'm a nice fun person, and I still get turned down loads. A woman will turn down a bloke for two reasons, 1) because she can, and 2) there are 30,000 single blokes to every single woman on here! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hah, trust me, it doesn't get any better for single guys either. I have a decent job, car and my own house, I'm a nice fun person, and I still get turned down loads. A woman will turn down a bloke for two reasons, 1) because she can, and 2) there are 30,000 single blokes to every single woman on here, she can afford to be choosy. |
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It is not the fact that the guy is a cheater that we wouldn't meet, it's because Sugar wouldn't feel comfortable meeting a guy that has a wife at home who doesn't know that he is cheating, a subtle difference.
As has been stated many times on these threads though, when there are so many single guys on here, why would a woman with any such issues get involved with meeting a married guy |
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"It is not the fact that the guy is a cheater that we wouldn't meet, it's because Sugar wouldn't feel comfortable meeting a guy that has a wife at home who doesn't know that he is cheating, a subtle difference.
As has been stated many times on these threads though, when there are so many single guys on here, why would a woman with any such issues get involved with meeting a married guy "
Point taken, but the OP posed the question about SEPARATED men, not 'married'. Or do you feel that until the divorce is final, they are still classed as married.
I certainly don't class myself as married, and am LEGALLY separated, divorce proceedings under way, and do not live together.
What would be your opinion of my position?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It is not the fact that the guy is a cheater that we wouldn't meet, it's because Sugar wouldn't feel comfortable meeting a guy that has a wife at home who doesn't know that he is cheating, a subtle difference.
As has been stated many times on these threads though, when there are so many single guys on here, why would a woman with any such issues get involved with meeting a married guy "
That was my point though. Is someone who is separated as per my examples, still considered 'married' by some? Is a separated person really a cheater?
I know it's a grey area and I'm not asking if people are honest about scenario's. I mean that if you know for a fact that someone is separated.... Would people view that the same as married... Or different? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they were in the process of seperating, I would ask them to bring the paperwork to a social meet then I could vet them to my standards. (I always carry a spy glass).
If they were long term seperated and wanted to get me into bed, I would ask them to issue the divorce paperwork prior to any agreement on my part to commit.
I would only sleep with them on receipt of an original decree absolute, once verified by my security department to check for any potential forgery (you can't trust singles, they will stoop to any level to get some Bussy love).
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In all seriousness, we all make calls on what people tell us on here.
Either we believe them and proceed, believe them and air on the side of caution or we don't believe them and tell them that there's nowt down.
Personally, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.
Then again, should they turn out to be a liar and there lies come to the surface, they must understand that it is a dog eat dog world and there's no way I'll be taking any shit (or lying) to get them off the hook or make them look like the innocent party. |
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"The irony is that if a woman was to say she was married on here, she still would be inundated with messages for a meet. However, if there is a man in the same situation, 9 times out of ten, he would be shunned because he would be considered as a cheater. Go figure "
Hmm, well it doesn't take a genius to work that one out. Let's see.. could it be because the are literally thousands of single guys on here, whereas there are considerably few genuine 'single' women? It not as though you have to go chasing the guys that are possibly taken when there are so many others to choose from. |
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Going back to the question though, I wouldn't meet someone that was claiming to be separated but living in the same house as the soon-to-be ex. I know it happens, and I know it could be genuine and she may not mind/care, but it wouldn't be worth taking the risk in my book. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im not divorced yet even tho ive been separated from my ex for over 3 years now, as far as im concerned im single, he has his life and i have mine, what i do is nothing to do with him so why would i even mention him to anyone im looking to meet?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The irony is that if a woman was to say she was married on here, she still would be inundated with messages for a meet. However, if there is a man in the same situation, 9 times out of ten, he would be shunned because he would be considered as a cheater. Go figure
Hmm, well it doesn't take a genius to work that one out. Let's see.. could it be because the are literally thousands of single guys on here, whereas there are considerably few genuine 'single' women? It not as though you have to go chasing the guys that are possibly taken when there are so many others to choose from."
I get what you are saying, but the fact remains that she is a cheater.
That's not a judgement, it's a fact.
Yet she 'gets away with it' because she is a woman.
At least with the men.
I don't think that that is a numbers thing, but I do believe that (most) men are comfortable with 'cheating' in it's physical form than women are.
That isn't always the case and I know there are faithful / honest guys out there too.
I remember seeing a comedian who did a stand up about being unfaithful.
He said that the womans reaction was usually devastation and saying things like 'oh it's all the lies, all the betrayal' whereas the guys reaction is 'somebody else has been fucking my wife'
Now OK it is 'comedic' in it's simplicity but I think there is also an element of truth in their too - that men and women view cheating on wholly different levels.
That perhaps also explains some of the vitriol I have seen poured out by other women towards women who 'cheat' irregardless of their specific circumstances / reasons for doing so.
I have also seen some double standards from married women who will not meet married men, but hey we can all have values when we don't impose them on ourselves.
It's a complex subject and always one bound to touch a nerve because it affects us all at a very base level. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Going back to the question though, I wouldn't meet someone that was claiming to be separated but living in the same house as the soon-to-be ex. I know it happens, and I know it could be genuine and she may not mind/care, but it wouldn't be worth taking the risk in my book."
Fair comment.
I wonder if couples view it differently. Ones that have always been together, and then those that have been divorced and have now met their partner through swinging... |
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