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By *arialoue OP Woman
over a year ago
bradford |
What the hell is wrong with the adult generation today you arrange to meet someone after months of chatting then when the day arrives I got a text saying see you soon at 10.30am n nothing since, we arrange to meet after lunch, this always happens to me this is y I don't wanna meet ppl no more,stuff like this triggers my depression and anxiety |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't think anything too much of it. What you need to remember is that not everyone can devote fab full-time to their lives, so maybe something else was going off which caused the delay.
If there was no click on their part though then they should say no instead of silence treatment. |
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By *arialoue OP Woman
over a year ago
bradford |
The reason why I thort we clicked coz we went foe a drive n on the way to drop me at home he said I'll no how to get to urs now(can be tricky if using satnav), we chatted about other stuff too, that's it for me coz it's tge same results evertime if we ever get to planning a meet n they turn up, I'm done now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it's affecting your mental wellbeing so much, then fab might not be the place for you right now.
Take a break. Maybe think about coming back in the near future. X |
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As a couple who have been swinging for nearly 24 years (yeah, we started young) we can only offer the following advice.
Unless it's an obvious our right attack on you, try not to take it personally.
None of what I'm going to say makes it easier but it is a reality of the situation.
When it comes to swinging and the broad net it casts, everyone is different. Some people want to get down and dirty where as some want to keep it purely social. Some express their intent out right and some don't know how to express themselves at all.
Some know how to say "this isn't for me" and some think blanking you is the only way to deal with it all. Etc etc etc.
We've taken a few knocks over the years and had a few occasions where we thought it went well just to get total radio silence but we've also met people where we didn't know how to say no thanks. We've even been in positions where we enjoy the company but either did not want to go further or only one of us was interested.
Or...(and this does happen), real life gets in the way so you cant get on fab and respond as fast as you like.
Point is, people are people and there are variables. No 2 people are the same and who knows what they have going on outside of fab. Maybe this guy isn't sure how to proceed, maybe he's been busy and maybe it is a waste of your time. I honestly do not know.
But I will say this.
Three things are true.
1) You need a thick skin in this lifestyle so this sort of thing isn't worth losing sleep over.
2) Not everyone is going to behave or respond how you hope...so again don't lose sleep.
3) There's more good than bad. We had a few huge confidence knockers when we started just to be followed up by a few amazing meets just a few weeks later.
I'm not justify what happened to you or how you where made to feel (it does suck), I'm just saying all this sort of thing...it can be rather fickle when it comes to the behaviour of others.
So be yourself, focus on you and try to forget the low parts because high parts wont be far behind.
At least that's our experience but we are a couple so no idea how that compares to your experience of the site.
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By *arialoue OP Woman
over a year ago
bradford |
Thanks for the advice this life isn't for me n this post wasn't about fab life I forgot to mention that in my first post, me n this guy had been chatting on n off for over 2 yrs yeah stuff got in the,eg covid last Yr, bad weather etc, even when we both lost touch with each other he always found me, he was the one who wanted to meet up for definitely this time, it happened think I'm going to give him few days to process what happened today n if I don't hear anything then I'll know thanks again |
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