FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Jealousy during play
Jealousy during play
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
Just wanted a general opinion on dealing with jealousy during couple play.
Went to eureka on Saturday as part of a couple. The girl I'm with enjoys playing with me and other girls but not other guys.
Whilst dancing she got chatting to a woman who was there with her husband. We both ended up snogging her. Chatted to her husband and he asked if my partner enjoyed playing with girls. I explained she does enjoy playing with other girls but it's down to her what she does.
He said he was happy to just watch us as a 3sum if me and my partner was up to that and happy not to touch my partner. His English wasn't excellent but thought it was all pretty clear.
Long story short we are back at the cabin playing and he is watching only. He asks to touch my partner and she says no.
He starts kicking off saying even when girls say they don't want to be touched before play they are normally happy to be touched during play.
Kinda ended the night on that note.
They left and his wife came back to play alone saying her husband was being jealous.
Am I wrong for thinking the guy is a dick? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Jealousy can be very intense and erotic for some men even when painful. It is never an excuse for bad manners. Partners who can't control themselves should wait at home or volunteer to be restrained so that the wife can enjoy herself freely
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Just wanted a general opinion on dealing with jealousy during couple play.
Went to eureka on Saturday as part of a couple. The girl I'm with enjoys playing with me and other girls but not other guys.
Whilst dancing she got chatting to a woman who was there with her husband. We both ended up snogging her. Chatted to her husband and he asked if my partner enjoyed playing with girls. I explained she does enjoy playing with other girls but it's down to her what she does.
He said he was happy to just watch us as a 3sum if me and my partner was up to that and happy not to touch my partner. His English wasn't excellent but thought it was all pretty clear.
Long story short we are back at the cabin playing and he is watching only. He asks to touch my partner and she says no.
He starts kicking off saying even when girls say they don't want to be touched before play they are normally happy to be touched during play.
Kinda ended the night on that note.
They left and his wife came back to play alone saying her husband was being jealous.
Am I wrong for thinking the guy is a dick?"
From what you say it sounds like you were very clear on the rules.
He was definitely being a dick. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just wanted a general opinion on dealing with jealousy during couple play.
Went to eureka on Saturday as part of a couple. The girl I'm with enjoys playing with me and other girls but not other guys.
Whilst dancing she got chatting to a woman who was there with her husband. We both ended up snogging her. Chatted to her husband and he asked if my partner enjoyed playing with girls. I explained she does enjoy playing with other girls but it's down to her what she does.
He said he was happy to just watch us as a 3sum if me and my partner was up to that and happy not to touch my partner. His English wasn't excellent but thought it was all pretty clear.
Long story short we are back at the cabin playing and he is watching only. He asks to touch my partner and she says no.
He starts kicking off saying even when girls say they don't want to be touched before play they are normally happy to be touched during play.
Kinda ended the night on that note.
They left and his wife came back to play alone saying her husband was being jealous.
Am I wrong for thinking the guy is a dick?"
Sounds like you were pretty clear on the rules. I'm not sure he was jealous, sounds like he thought he'd try his luck - got rejected and couldnt handle it , so threw his toys out.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
Up to this point we have only ever played with single girls and my partner has always been pretty clear she doesn't want other guys involved. This was our first time playing with someone with a partner watching.
What was insulting was he asked me if he could touch my partners breasts, not her. I think we will be avoiding couples from now om. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
Poorly organised in my opinion.
I also think his own partner should have been a bit more considerate and aware.
I know it's sex but people have feelings. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don't see that as jealousy. That is disrepect and manipulation; pure and simple. You set out the rules beforehand and he agreed while having no intention of adhering to them. Total chancer! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't see that as jealousy. That is disrepect and manipulation; pure and simple. You set out the rules beforehand and he agreed while having no intention of adhering to them. Total chancer!"
Spot on ! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
Poorly organised in my opinion.
I also think his own partner should have been a bit more considerate and aware.
I know it's sex but people have feelings."
It was a mff 3sum. Not sure whats badly organised. He agreed to watch his partner in a 3sum. My partner said she didn't want to be touched by him.
He agreed and was hoping my partner would change her mind during the act because she would be horny. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
Poorly organised in my opinion.
I also think his own partner should have been a bit more considerate and aware.
I know it's sex but people have feelings."
You need to read the OP again... there were only 2 ladies I believe.
The agreement was not to join, no means no, not maybe 
He was disrespectful by expecting something different to what was agreed. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
Poorly organised in my opinion.
I also think his own partner should have been a bit more considerate and aware.
I know it's sex but people have feelings."
Nonsense.
I have watched bunny with other men, women and couples.
Never have I decided that part way through I would try to renegotiate the rules we had all agreed on.
If they wanted me to join in then they could invite me, but this was a clear attempt to try and get some action via deception. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I can only offer my own humble opinion.
I think was badly organised between the guy who felt hurt and his own partner.
They do not seem to know each other very well and do not seem to be on the same page.
We are tallking about very intimate feelings between people.
I stand by my previous post.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"I can only offer my own humble opinion.
I think was badly organised between the guy who felt hurt and his own partner.
They do not seem to know each other very well and do not seem to be on the same page.
We are tallking about very intimate feelings between people.
I stand by my previous post.
"
If a girl says she doesn't want to be touched don't try your luck because she is horny during the act hoping she change her mind.
Strange hill to die on for you be here we are. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point."
What utter drivel! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
What utter drivel!"
Amen |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Just wanted a general opinion on dealing with jealousy during couple play.
Went to eureka on Saturday as part of a couple. The girl I'm with enjoys playing with me and other girls but not other guys.
Whilst dancing she got chatting to a woman who was there with her husband. We both ended up snogging her. Chatted to her husband and he asked if my partner enjoyed playing with girls. I explained she does enjoy playing with other girls but it's down to her what she does.
He said he was happy to just watch us as a 3sum if me and my partner was up to that and happy not to touch my partner. His English wasn't excellent but thought it was all pretty clear.
Long story short we are back at the cabin playing and he is watching only. He asks to touch my partner and she says no.
He starts kicking off saying even when girls say they don't want to be touched before play they are normally happy to be touched during play.
Kinda ended the night on that note.
They left and his wife came back to play alone saying her husband was being jealous.
Am I wrong for thinking the guy is a dick?"
He tried to manipulate you by lying beforehand and making an agreement with full intention of not keeping it and violating your partner's consent. So yes, a dick and a rapist. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *assNGuyCouple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck. "
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple first before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
Poorly organised in my opinion.
I also think his own partner should have been a bit more considerate and aware.
I know it's sex but people have feelings."
Then he should not have agreed to it. People are responsible for handling their own feelings and not pushing them on to others and partners in a couple are responsible for having a clear understanding of what they agree on before they engage with other people. OP made it all clear and the other couple agreed to it in advance. If feelings change then they are entitled to leave the situation but not to violate consent. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple first before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had. "
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago
Catthorpe |
"I think his initial intention may have been ok but the situation got the better of him. Nothing more."
Well it shouldn't have. If he's that way inclined he should remove himself from the situation or not get involved, no one needs that shit. Bang out order and a dickhead. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple first before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any! "
No its far from normal, also swingers clubs are no different to private meets.
You are as at risk from ghosting, people trying to decive and all the other risks on a private meet as you are at a swingers club.
I'm afraid dickheads are common in society at large so whether in a club, hotel or home, your odds are the same. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think if it was different and some how it was a female who had been put in a sitation that created conflict or hurt feeling or she felt something regarding her partner everyone would be offering sympathy and helpful advice - stay safe, be clear, let them know how you feel, etc.
But as it's a guy every calls him a 'dick'. That's the level of understanding and sympathy guys get on here from some people.
c'est la vie.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"I think if it was different and some how it was a female who had been put in a sitation that created conflict or hurt feeling or she felt something regarding her partner everyone would be offering sympathy and helpful advice - stay safe, be clear, let them know how you feel, etc.
But as it's a guy every calls him a 'dick'. That's the level of understanding and sympathy guys get on here from some people.
c'est la vie.
"
My partner said she didn't want to be touched by him. He was happy with the situation and was quite eager for me to fuck his wife and was telling me how he liked to watch.
When a girl says no that means no. Strange hill to die on but here you are. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I really do not understand why you are trying to turn it into men vs women.
I think that the couple in question did not have a clue what they were getting into and did not handling it very well.
I just think they, including he, deserve as much sympathy as anyone else.
We are not going to agree so lets please just agree to disagree and hope that maybe someone else moight even avoid such a situation having read this thread.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"I really do not understand why you are trying to turn it into men vs women.
I think that the couple in question did not have a clue what they were getting into and did not handling it very well.
I just think they, including he, deserve as much sympathy as anyone else.
We are not going to agree so lets please just agree to disagree and hope that maybe someone else moight even avoid such a situation having read this thread.
"
I fail to see how you think this man deserves sympathy.
My partner said to him she did not want to be touched. His wife wanted a 3sum. He said he wanted to watch her in a 3sum.
During the act he then asked to touch my partner and she said no. He then spat his dummy out saying how girls before had said no before but had changed there mind during the act. That's pressuring women to do stuff they don't want to do or try to catch them off guard when they are not concentrating.
That is predatory and wrong.
Not sure why this needs explanation.
Your defense of well of course he will want to touch does not stand up. It's the same as single men being allowed to watch a couple play and push it by trying to touch the women during the act. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *assNGuyCouple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple first before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any! "
We go as a couple and play as a couple so for us this “normal” works. Clear understanding if one us said no we don’t play.
Honestly not sure why its a big deal as a couple its not like they ignoring asking the female, there are 2 halfs to a couple not just 1 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The fact that he chucked a hissy fit in after being told no is disgusting. The man is a complete idiot. He chanced his luck by asking after agreeing to just watch. However at least he asked. In my experience most people ask the male half if they can touch his wife. Don't let it put you off meeting couples. We are not all rude x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think if it was different and some how it was a female who had been put in a sitation that created conflict or hurt feeling or she felt something regarding her partner everyone would be offering sympathy and helpful advice - stay safe, be clear, let them know how you feel, etc.
But as it's a guy every calls him a 'dick'. That's the level of understanding and sympathy guys get on here from some people.
"
No mate. If someone's being a dick, guy or girl, they should be called out for it.
It's not that the guy in question wasn't sure of his own feelings, it's that he lied to advance a situation in the hopes of manipulating things his way. You know this to be true due to the hissy fit being thrown when his request was rejected. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You will find this happens with some couples its alway the guys in couples that cause the problem (some couples correction) ive had more run ins with guys as part of a couple than any single guys ...there seems to be a sense of entitalment with some of them ... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
I'm really glad I posted this and got all the feed back because it was kinda confusing emotions. I felt a little guilty because this guy had to sit there while his wife gave me a blow job but fuck it. He was quite adamant he wanted to watch a 3sum. At first I thought my partner and his wife was just going to go off and play alone or we watch.
I have only had to deal with a jealous partner once before and that was about 20 years ago. I still chuckle about it to this day. I was 22 and I had a fwb who was about 30. We saw each other maybe 10 times. I get a phone call out of the blue and she explains she is seeing a guy in his 40s now. He keeps asking her for a 3sum with another girl but her condition is she will do it if she can have a mmf 3sum. She had chose me.
I turned up to this guys house and he was very excited about the idea and kept going on about how "hot" it's gonna be. We all get down to it and the idea was a bit to much for him as she shot his bolt within 2 minutes.
He's now sitting in his armchair watching me fuck his missus and he is in full post orgasm clarity with a floppy cock that isn't gonna get hard again that night.
5 minutes into watching he loses his temper telling me i am taking the piss and disrespecting his house etc. I thought it was gonna turn into a fight lmao. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just wanted a general opinion on dealing with jealousy during couple play.
Went to eureka on Saturday as part of a couple. The girl I'm with enjoys playing with me and other girls but not other guys.
Whilst dancing she got chatting to a woman who was there with her husband. We both ended up snogging her. Chatted to her husband and he asked if my partner enjoyed playing with girls. I explained she does enjoy playing with other girls but it's down to her what she does.
He said he was happy to just watch us as a 3sum if me and my partner was up to that and happy not to touch my partner. His English wasn't excellent but thought it was all pretty clear.
Long story short we are back at the cabin playing and he is watching only. He asks to touch my partner and she says no.
He starts kicking off saying even when girls say they don't want to be touched before play they are normally happy to be touched during play.
Kinda ended the night on that note.
They left and his wife came back to play alone saying her husband was being jealous.
Am I wrong for thinking the guy is a dick?
He tried to manipulate you by lying beforehand and making an agreement with full intention of not keeping it and violating your partner's consent. So yes, a dick and a rapist. "
Oh steady on there with that  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple first before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any!
No its far from normal, also swingers clubs are no different to private meets.
You are as at risk from ghosting, people trying to decive and all the other risks on a private meet as you are at a swingers club.
I'm afraid dickheads are common in society at large so whether in a club, hotel or home, your odds are the same. "
_uckandbunny, you make an excellent point - absolutely. I actually meant as opposed to kink clubs.
I will not meet anyone privately until I have a strong enough indication that they respect me and that I will be comfortable with them so the only times I had a chance to meet anyone privately through this website was together with a trusted play partner who assured my safety.
Otherwise my favourite kink clubs are always my preferred option, not only because I would know lots of people there and the organisers but also because kink clubs have Dungeon Monitors which swingers club do not seem to have - from my limited experience. I am only getting more dubious about swingers clubs after reading forum threads I must admit and I might be entirely mistaken but I would rather be safe than harmed... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think if it was different and some how it was a female who had been put in a sitation that created conflict or hurt feeling or she felt something regarding her partner everyone would be offering sympathy and helpful advice - stay safe, be clear, let them know how you feel, etc.
But as it's a guy every calls him a 'dick'. That's the level of understanding and sympathy guys get on here from some people.
c'est la vie.
"
No, you do not get to violate consent and call it "feelings". If a person gets upset by the scenario they have agreed to, they have the right to leave that scenario - not the right to force others into doing what they do not want to do. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple fiprst before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any!
No its far from normal, also swingers clubs are no different to private meets.
You are as at risk from ghosting, people trying to decive and all the other risks on a private meet as you are at a swingers club.
I'm afraid dickheads are common in society at large so whether in a club, hotel or home, your odds are the same.
_uckandbunny, you make an excellent point - absolutely. I actually meant as opposed to kink clubs.
I will not meet anyone privately until I have a strong enough indication that they respect me and that I will be comfortable with them so the only times I had a chance to meet anyone privately through this website was together with a trusted play partner who assured my safety.
Otherwise my favourite kink clubs are always my preferred option, not only because I would know lots of people there and the organisers but also because kink clubs have Dungeon Monitors which swingers club do not seem to have - from my limited experience. I am only getting more dubious about swingers clubs after reading forum threads I must admit and I might be entirely mistaken but I would rather be safe than harmed..."
The angriest incident we have had was at a kink club called dvs a few years ago in London. You had a basement area to play and dungeon monitors. That guy didn't exactly do a good job as I found a guy trying to wank on us whilst playing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We met a couple ( Their first meet) after a long while we decided as a group for some play. Mrs was giving him a BJ and I was licking her. We were about to move onto penetration when he grabbed her and demanded she fuck him. We just went with it and essentially did a soft swap. She messaged us with a really nice note saying this was not for them and they are leaving fab. 2 weeks later got messaged from him asking for a mfm. Wtf |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Just wanted a general opinion on dealing with jealousy during couple play.
Went to eureka on Saturday as part of a couple. The girl I'm with enjoys playing with me and other girls but not other guys.
Whilst dancing she got chatting to a woman who was there with her husband. We both ended up snogging her. Chatted to her husband and he asked if my partner enjoyed playing with girls. I explained she does enjoy playing with other girls but it's down to her what she does.
He said he was happy to just watch us as a 3sum if me and my partner was up to that and happy not to touch my partner. His English wasn't excellent but thought it was all pretty clear.
Long story short we are back at the cabin playing and he is watching only. He asks to touch my partner and she says no.
He starts kicking off saying even when girls say they don't want to be touched before play they are normally happy to be touched during play.
Kinda ended the night on that note.
They left and his wife came back to play alone saying her husband was being jealous.
Am I wrong for thinking the guy is a dick?
He tried to manipulate you by lying beforehand and making an agreement with full intention of not keeping it and violating your partner's consent. So yes, a dick and a rapist.
Oh steady on there with that "
I think that people are often too reluctant to call things by their names and to use various euphemisms when it comes to consent. Lots of them though do not have a problem "shoulding" women who have been assaulted and blaming them for men's violent behaviour.
Same in this very thread - "you could hardly expect for a man not to get all excited blah blah blah". What, is he an animal who cannot control himself? He is not. He is a human and held to the standards of basic human decency. No, men are not more entitled to sex than women. No, they cannot violate consent and break agreements because they suddenly feel like it. No one can, man, woman and other genders - theoretically speaking of course. People do awful things to each other, I wish they didn't. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago
Catthorpe |
"I think if it was different and some how it was a female who had been put in a sitation that created conflict or hurt feeling or she felt something regarding her partner everyone would be offering sympathy and helpful advice - stay safe, be clear, let them know how you feel, etc.
But as it's a guy every calls him a 'dick'. That's the level of understanding and sympathy guys get on here from some people.
c'est la vie.
"
I find this the most baffling post in the thread, we're not talking about hurt feelings we're talking about crossing agreed lines and the sex of the person is irrelevant, you don't do that sort of thing regardless. I really do wonder about some of the males states of mind on this site.
Him. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple fiprst before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any!
No its far from normal, also swingers clubs are no different to private meets.
You are as at risk from ghosting, people trying to decive and all the other risks on a private meet as you are at a swingers club.
I'm afraid dickheads are common in society at large so whether in a club, hotel or home, your odds are the same.
_uckandbunny, you make an excellent point - absolutely. I actually meant as opposed to kink clubs.
I will not meet anyone privately until I have a strong enough indication that they respect me and that I will be comfortable with them so the only times I had a chance to meet anyone privately through this website was together with a trusted play partner who assured my safety.
Otherwise my favourite kink clubs are always my preferred option, not only because I would know lots of people there and the organisers but also because kink clubs have Dungeon Monitors which swingers club do not seem to have - from my limited experience. I am only getting more dubious about swingers clubs after reading forum threads I must admit and I might be entirely mistaken but I would rather be safe than harmed...
The angriest incident we have had was at a kink club called dvs a few years ago in London. You had a basement area to play and dungeon monitors. That guy didn't exactly do a good job as I found a guy trying to wank on us whilst playing."
I am so sorry to read this! I have very close association to it and this was my favourite club, it meant everything to me. I hope that this wanker had been dealt with at least afterwards! I have experienced incidents myself, even at my beloved DVS because it is impossible to pre-empt and too often these creeps ruin things because even when they are dealt with afterwards they still inflict the damage.
Masturbating was allowed in the red room I believe but at a distance, not crowding somebody or worse, touching without consent. What a piece of poo fungus. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Whatever the situation it is always a womans right to say no. Obviously a guy can change his mind as well as we are all wired the same. As they say a standing cock has no conscience.
Most women, not all, are different wanting a connection or whatever. I woman has the right to say at any point even as the old one eyed trouser snakes enters the zone of dreams.if a guy doesn't stop when told to at best its assault at worst possible r**e |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *g1979 OP Man
over a year ago
bexley |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple fiprst before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any!
No its far from normal, also swingers clubs are no different to private meets.
You are as at risk from ghosting, people trying to decive and all the other risks on a private meet as you are at a swingers club.
I'm afraid dickheads are common in society at large so whether in a club, hotel or home, your odds are the same.
_uckandbunny, you make an excellent point - absolutely. I actually meant as opposed to kink clubs.
I will not meet anyone privately until I have a strong enough indication that they respect me and that I will be comfortable with them so the only times I had a chance to meet anyone privately through this website was together with a trusted play partner who assured my safety.
Otherwise my favourite kink clubs are always my preferred option, not only because I would know lots of people there and the organisers but also because kink clubs have Dungeon Monitors which swingers club do not seem to have - from my limited experience. I am only getting more dubious about swingers clubs after reading forum threads I must admit and I might be entirely mistaken but I would rather be safe than harmed...
The angriest incident we have had was at a kink club called dvs a few years ago in London. You had a basement area to play and dungeon monitors. That guy didn't exactly do a good job as I found a guy trying to wank on us whilst playing.
I am so sorry to read this! I have very close association to it and this was my favourite club, it meant everything to me. I hope that this wanker had been dealt with at least afterwards! I have experienced incidents myself, even at my beloved DVS because it is impossible to pre-empt and too often these creeps ruin things because even when they are dealt with afterwards they still inflict the damage.
Masturbating was allowed in the red room I believe but at a distance, not crowding somebody or worse, touching without consent. What a piece of poo fungus."
We used to love dvs. Foxy would always make the night.
My partner and I was on the play bed and I look up and a guy has his dick in front of our faces trying to masturbate on us.
I quickly made him go away and told the guy who was supposed to be taking care of the play area to do his job.
We spoke to cleo and he was booted. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Jealousy can be very intense and erotic for some men even when painful. It is never an excuse for bad manners. Partners who can't control themselves should wait at home or volunteer to be restrained so that the wife can enjoy herself freely
"
Totally agree |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple fiprst before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any!
No its far from normal, also swingers clubs are no different to private meets.
You are as at risk from ghosting, people trying to decive and all the other risks on a private meet as you are at a swingers club.
I'm afraid dickheads are common in society at large so whether in a club, hotel or home, your odds are the same.
_uckandbunny, you make an excellent point - absolutely. I actually meant as opposed to kink clubs.
I will not meet anyone privately until I have a strong enough indication that they respect me and that I will be comfortable with them so the only times I had a chance to meet anyone privately through this website was together with a trusted play partner who assured my safety.
Otherwise my favourite kink clubs are always my preferred option, not only because I would know lots of people there and the organisers but also because kink clubs have Dungeon Monitors which swingers club do not seem to have - from my limited experience. I am only getting more dubious about swingers clubs after reading forum threads I must admit and I might be entirely mistaken but I would rather be safe than harmed...
The angriest incident we have had was at a kink club called dvs a few years ago in London. You had a basement area to play and dungeon monitors. That guy didn't exactly do a good job as I found a guy trying to wank on us whilst playing.
I am so sorry to read this! I have very close association to it and this was my favourite club, it meant everything to me. I hope that this wanker had been dealt with at least afterwards! I have experienced incidents myself, even at my beloved DVS because it is impossible to pre-empt and too often these creeps ruin things because even when they are dealt with afterwards they still inflict the damage.
Masturbating was allowed in the red room I believe but at a distance, not crowding somebody or worse, touching without consent. What a piece of poo fungus.
We used to love dvs. Foxy would always make the night.
My partner and I was on the play bed and I look up and a guy has his dick in front of our faces trying to masturbate on us.
I quickly made him go away and told the guy who was supposed to be taking care of the play area to do his job.
We spoke to cleo and he was booted."
Oh, I am glad. Yes - this is what I mean, that creeps cannot be pre-empted unfortunately but at least when there are dedicated Dungeon Monitors and ambassadors in addition, they at least get dealt with quickly and we are supported. I had a similar situation where I was on the bench cuffs being fasted by my scene partner and he was doing the ankles so did not see what was going on in the front for a few minutes and this dirtbag came close to me, leaned over my ear and started talking about what he wanted to do to me or some crap I recoiled (as much as I could when immobilised) and my partner got up then the creep vanished. We went ahead with our scene but afterwards I still remembered because that awful moment of fear of attack and repulsion when I was completely vulnerable was hard to forget and went looking for him to give a piece of my mind. He was gone and I realised that he got thrown out, probably soon after.
They do look for specifically convenient moments to them and opportunities when DM is busy for example.
Of course, DVS was open to all public, the dress code was minimum so such situations were extremely hard to avoid (as opposed to very strictly vetted events which require enormous effort and can only be small) but then how are new people meant to start if they are not included? So always a fine balance. Hence the ambassadors which had social duties but also serves as extra eyes everywhere. As a woman attending alone this has been the safest club for me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"To be honest it's ridiculous to expect that any man is going to sit and watch three naked women playing, one being his own parnter, and not want to join in at soime point.
Poorly organised in my opinion.
I also think his own partner should have been a bit more considerate and aware.
I know it's sex but people have feelings."
i dont thinks its been poorly organised he actually stated the rules of the boundry then he moved the goalposts |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *assNGuyCouple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"The biggest insult was asking me if he could touch my partners and not asking her. Like what the fuck.
This is pretty normal, most guys ask the male half of a couple first before then asking the female.
If either said no then no play was had.
Just my opinion - this "normal" is not OK and needs to change. If this is what happens at swingers clubs and the attitudes that are there then I think I might never end up going to any! "
This isn't what happens at swingers clubs, this is what happens with some people. Some prefer to check with the guy some don't. Lass likes fact some have asked me if OK. Doesn't make it right or wrong.
I don't expect or ask that you agree with Lass opinions or thoughts as I don't always agree with her views but doesn't mean I should censor her 
Yes asking the guy if his missus can be played with is borderline sexist and possibly does need change but for others they feel it's decency and maybe even a safety check as the guy is stereotypically the more dangerous of the couple so chance they can gauge how he would likely react.
Personally, I am very laid back and choice of who Lass plays with at a night is hers as its her body. We already spoke before that night how we plan to play it, whether can play separately or only playing together based on various factors including how we feel that day/night.
Guy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *assNGuyCouple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
Now on the OP actual topic post.
Concur with vast majority... the guy was wrong to try but this is where maybe I differ slightly from rest above.
You state a few things like poor English and you thought he understood so agree with post poorly organised.
In that situation I would have utilised his other half to make sure he understood boundaries and limits. Even then I would have took it slow with a little play and then check he is still fine for it to continue especially given he has a vested emotional connection whereas you both were/are fuck buddies.
Nonetheless you may have fed into the problem but he was still wrong to try impose himself upon situation and your FB.
1 reason I don't tend to entertain play with people with considerable language barriers but each to their own and their safety. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
