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Do we give single men another chance
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By *ev_1 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bickliegh |
Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol  |
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By *9Karm69Man
over a year ago
plymouth/chesterfield |
"Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol "
Thats just plain rude on both occasions, please don't tar all single blokes with same brush |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol "
Sorry to hear that OP. It can put you off for sure. But not everyone's like that on here. Give the rest of us good eggs a go   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First one is completely inexcusable.
Second one, depends on what had been agreed before going to the hotel. If nothing had been agreed I would perhaps give the benefit of the doubt that he didn't know the etiquette, maybe.
He could have been staying in a hotel with work colleagues / family in a different room have not wanting to meet in the bar? Or he could just be a dick. |
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By *ediMan
over a year ago
Leeds |
No don't, we ain't all the same and I have had a similar experience the other way around with a couple, arranging a meet with them initiating, then being contacted day before to confirm and numerous time on the actual day to confirm the time and that I'm actually coming,when I ask for postcode they don't send, 3 hours after the agreed time, they then message saying plans plans had changed and couldn't message me yet were online, glad I didn't leave home  |
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If people are no longer interested why can’t they just say at the earliest opportunity? I wish people here would have more decency towards each other as were all here due to a shared interest. It’s not just single guys either, single women and couples are the same. It really isn’t difficult to be nice, play nice and respect people  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sounds suspiciously like they got cold feet but didn't have the bottle to say so. Not everyone is the same so try not to tarnish us all with the same brush - I know it's hard not to. |
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In our experience, there are equally unreliable single guys and couples.
But there are far more singles, so it follows they will appear to be the worst.
We are quite strict now when meeting single guys, they really have to make the effort to come in our direction for a meet.
We've spent far too long waiting in cafes and bars only to get the message that their budgie has died and they're too upset to come out for a shag.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have had both good and bad experiences! Always best to have a phone chat before arranging a meet that way you also get an idea if you're going to get along rather than long awkward silences...
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I think men understandably get the spotlight on here for no shows, but I've had the same for couples. It sounds like you're curious, I think it's just harder to wade through the time wasters etc. to find what you're looking for. If guys aren't willing to speak more, then it's generally a sign that they're more likely to jump ship so to speak |
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Absolutely not! Don’t give single men a chance. I can tell you that two (which were your choices) letting you down is an absolute indicator that all the millions of single men on here are the same. So don’t waste your time.
In case this was missed, I am being sarcastic. |
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By *dquestCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough |
We only meet single guys once in a blue moon. We let a few prospects know we are going to a club and then chat with any who actually turn up. If we are really impressed, we play. If not, we can go have our own fun at the club and so can they. |
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"Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol "
A pity you weren't in Liverpool on Friday night, when I had a hotel room all to myself, but couldn't find anyone interested in joining me 
I'm confident you would have been happy to consider meeting single guys again afterwards...... |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
We decided during lock down we'd start chats with people with a view to a social distanced coffee when lock down ended back end of March. We were chatting with 7 single men. All but 1 messed us about. Had that coffee, arranged to meet again when safe to do so. We go on to say, 2 weeks ago we invited a guy to coffee who had been fabbing pictures for a couple of years on and off, chatting too over this time and always came across respectful, but we always found he lived to close so never thought we'd be comfortable to meet with him. Anyway, he used the line 'don't tar all us men wit the same brush' as some of us are genuine' He stood us up. No message to say he can't make it or why he didn't turn up. We have given up now. |
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That was our experience prior to lockdown but we actually met two lovely guys this weekend, neither sent excessive messages before or after the meet, both turned up as arranged, and both were great fun during the meets
They were both a pleasant surprise and a definite improvement on our pre Covid experiences
MrsB |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We decided during lock down we'd start chats with people with a view to a social distanced coffee when lock down ended back end of March. We were chatting with 7 single men. All but 1 messed us about. Had that coffee, arranged to meet again when safe to do so. We go on to say, 2 weeks ago we invited a guy to coffee who had been fabbing pictures for a couple of years on and off, chatting too over this time and always came across respectful, but we always found he lived to close so never thought we'd be comfortable to meet with him. Anyway, he used the line 'don't tar all us men wit the same brush' as some of us are genuine' He stood us up. No message to say he can't make it or why he didn't turn up. We have given up now."
Really sorry to hear that.
I find it quite baffling really.
There's so many men on here vying for attention and wanting to get meets, but when you hear stories like this, it makes you scratch your head 
puts us (the good eggs) in a bad light, but I can assure you that not everyone is like those guys |
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By *ev_1 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bickliegh |
"First one is completely inexcusable.
Second one, depends on what had been agreed before going to the hotel. If nothing had been agreed I would perhaps give the benefit of the doubt that he didn't know the etiquette, maybe.
He could have been staying in a hotel with work colleagues / family in a different room have not wanting to meet in the bar? Or he could just be a dick."
we agreed to meet in the bar for a drink first which he agreed too drove to his hotel 35 mins away arrived messaged once we where there several more messages with said male who refused to come out of his room to the bar 15 messages later we gave up so given 45 mins of our time in the hotel bar !! |
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By *ev_1 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bickliegh |
"couples like you say the same thing.
its always going to be a risk, you will have one success to 10 failures.
"
couples like us who are genuine do message peeps on the rare occasions we need to cancel we never said all couples were like us but it only takes 2mins to log on and cancel a meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s absolutely shit that singles do that firstly what’s the point in putting effort in with a couple getting to know them etc then to just not show or be rude pointless and baffling.
Don’t give up |
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By *ev_1 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bickliegh |
Thanks for everyone's comments but don't feel that we are out to alienate any single male as we do know there are alot of great ones out there just putting our experience out there x |
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"people like that give us good single guys a bad name "
Sadly some guys have also been known to pose as couples/females simply to string other people along only to either let them down or mislead them. Often it's to do with just talking dirty and exchanging pictures of their ex wife/partner before suddenly disappearing. They've also been known to try the old 'the wife's felt ill this evening so I came alone' routine.
It's impossible to stop this but being aware of the signs does help flag up people who might not be what they say they are so you can do a bit more checking e.g. chatting or camming with both parties. That's why it's not necessarily a good idea to go to a lot of trouble and expense (e.g. an unrecoverable hotel bill) on a first meeting unless you're fine with taking the risk of wasting both your money and your time.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol "
Obviously not swingers, the site is full of single men thinking this is a hook up site who bottle it at the last minute. When chatting, my advice would be to ask them about their experience of the lifestyle, what clubs have they been to, ask them about their funniest meet etc. You'll soon work out the time wasters from the real swingers |
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We dont meet single guys outside of socials or clubs and even then that would be a rare thing as it's not what my wife is really into.
When we did try during a period of dabbling, we heard all the lines and have since been catfished one times to many. Every time was a let down or we ended being stood up. Last one was a boozy as we where out the door and on our way when we got the message "sorry I'm not coming. Forgot the foot ball was on".
Are all guys on here the same? No.and we dont pretend otherwise. I meet solo and im completely reliable but being married (even as part of a swinger couple) puts a lot off.
Fact is, fab is full of wananbe piss takers. Many out themselves very quick but some are a bit cleverer. Side side effect of being a free site.
Eitherway, socials and clubs seem the best option now. Fabs just a facilitator to other events rather than a meet method for us these days.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had similar treatment from couples and single women, so I'd say, in response to your question, that it's not a 'single male' thing.
There just seem to be people like this about, men and women.
It's unfortunate, but, regrettably, it happens.
I'd say don't be put off by the behaviour of a couple of people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for everyone's comments but don't feel that we are out to alienate any single male as we do know there are alot of great ones out there just putting our experience out there x"
No, it's all good. Thanks for highlighting your experiences mate |
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"We have had both good and bad experiences! Always best to have a phone chat before arranging a meet that way you also get an idea if you're going to get along rather than long awkward silences...
"
I agree with this. If your relying on all communication being via fab in a build up to a meet you are more at risk of being messed around by a fake or fantasist. If they can’t do a phone call or face time prior then the alarm bells should start to ring. |
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unfortunately on these sites there are plenty of fantasists , not just blokes but there seem to be more of them about that will totally waste the time of the real swingers on here , it's why like a lot of others i tend to go to clubs now as its usually real genuine people that go |
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This why asking to chst outside here is very important once meet is planned should exchange numbers or kik but if all communication are through here most of the time meets don't happen doesn't Matter if its female male or couples
And not many people likes doing the social side specially with couples it could put u awkward position
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By *9Karm69Man
over a year ago
plymouth/chesterfield |
"We decided during lock down we'd start chats with people with a view to a social distanced coffee when lock down ended back end of March. We were chatting with 7 single men. All but 1 messed us about. Had that coffee, arranged to meet again when safe to do so. We go on to say, 2 weeks ago we invited a guy to coffee who had been fabbing pictures for a couple of years on and off, chatting too over this time and always came across respectful, but we always found he lived to close so never thought we'd be comfortable to meet with him. Anyway, he used the line 'don't tar all us men wit the same brush' as some of us are genuine' He stood us up. No message to say he can't make it or why he didn't turn up. We have given up now."
Just to let all know that i used that expression earlier in the thred but it was NOT ME to whom is mentioned above, need to make sure my name is clean and NOT tarnished |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol "
.
We feel your pain! Lol
There are not all like that but from our experience a big percentage are!
Thair loss tho xx
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Those two were scum of the Earth OP.
When I had a couple profile I usually "interviewed" 20 to 25 men and invited 10 to get 3 or 4 to turn up. Men may outnumber women and couples on fab 20:1 but in terms of reliability for meets it is more like 3:1.
When trying to get reliable men I used to read the veris. No good veris then no offer of play. Personally I have never not turned up but I blocked numerous time wasters who didnt in the past. |
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"Question do we give single men another chance ? After being messed around twice this weekend do we give up on single men 1st one chatting all week messaged us the night before can't wait to meet us logs on 2hrs before meet didn't read our message couldn't be bothered to tell us he isn't turning up we arrived at the meeting point and
no single male 2nd one we quickly arranged come around to my hotel meet me at the bar he said . So we went to hotel loads of messages bar easy to walk into get drinks then he will not come out of his hotel room and come to the bar expected us to by the wine and go straight to his room lol
Obviously not swingers, the site is full of single men thinking this is a hook up site who bottle it at the last minute. When chatting, my advice would be to ask them about their experience of the lifestyle, what clubs have they been to, ask them about their funniest meet etc. You'll soon work out the time wasters from the real swingers "
Yes I agree with that, non swinger blokes wanting to shag someone’s wife, talk the talk, but in the end it dawns on them that they’ll have to bang said hotwife in front of her hubby, ohh no he might see my willy!  |
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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
So just sharing my experience of how to get the best experience of meeting single reliable guys.
Arrange to meet for a social local to you early on. Worst case scenario, you’ve lost an hour of your life having a coffee or a drink somewhere you like ( if you’re a couple you get to have a little flirt too ) This sorts out the genuine ones early doors. You probably won’t fancy all of them but it’s worth the effort to avoid the frustration of getting all prepared for a proper meet and then a no show.
I also advise going to clubs and parties to find more reliable people. Plus it’s a fun evening even if you don’t play! |
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