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Off puts of a bigger/chunky/fat man.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?"

Absolutely nothing, OP - there is nothing wrong with a bigger guy - if anything I really quite like guys who are a bit on the portly side.

But then I will add, for me it is the personality, their ability to have a conversation beyond fabs and a sense of humour.

And... I do not believe I am the only woman on here who likes a chunky hunk.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?"

there still has to be an attraction ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

Absolutely nothing, OP - there is nothing wrong with a bigger guy - if anything I really quite like guys who are a bit on the portly side.

But then I will add, for me it is the personality, their ability to have a conversation beyond fabs and a sense of humour.

And... I do not believe I am the only woman on here who likes a chunky hunk. "

A chunky hunk, I like that saying lol.

Like I said personality is a major factor, as is looking and smelling good. Which me personally I always like to do.

It just feels, when looking at certain profiles, there seems to be a stigma attached to been a bigger male.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

Absolutely nothing, OP - there is nothing wrong with a bigger guy - if anything I really quite like guys who are a bit on the portly side.

But then I will add, for me it is the personality, their ability to have a conversation beyond fabs and a sense of humour.

And... I do not believe I am the only woman on here who likes a chunky hunk.

A chunky hunk, I like that saying lol.

Like I said personality is a major factor, as is looking and smelling good. Which me personally I always like to do.

It just feels, when looking at certain profiles, there seems to be a stigma attached to been a bigger male. "

I could say the same about some profiles that state a requirement to be a certain shape/ size.

I thin a better way to look at this is to is to be confident in your personality, the efforts you make to smell nice etc. and in meeting those who do not specify they want a slim guy?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

there still has to be an attraction ??"

But Surley an attraction can be formed with conversation. Not just pictures.

I mean if you meet to have fun with someone, then ain't you going to want some form of conversation before you meet, during and after.

Isn't it all about seducing the mind first, isn't that done with conversation?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

Absolutely nothing, OP - there is nothing wrong with a bigger guy - if anything I really quite like guys who are a bit on the portly side.

But then I will add, for me it is the personality, their ability to have a conversation beyond fabs and a sense of humour.

And... I do not believe I am the only woman on here who likes a chunky hunk.

A chunky hunk, I like that saying lol.

Like I said personality is a major factor, as is looking and smelling good. Which me personally I always like to do.

It just feels, when looking at certain profiles, there seems to be a stigma attached to been a bigger male.

I could say the same about some profiles that state a requirement to be a certain shape/ size.

I thin a better way to look at this is to is to be confident in your personality, the efforts you make to smell nice etc. and in meeting those who do not specify they want a slim guy? "

emphasised

Agreed.

I'm aiming this as obviously an open conversation.

But if I'm going to go personally about myself. I always, like to look and smell good and believe that seduction starts in the mind and with great conversation. But hey, I'm an aries with a fiesty personality so I love good conversation.

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By *uiet confidenceMan  over a year ago

Warrington

I suppose it ultimately comes down to personal preference of what people are and aren’t attracted to - most people will always have certain things that they struggle to see beyond (be it a dislike of “chunky” people, a dislike of body or facial hair or whatever) irrespective of how great a personality that person may have. Others will find those same traits attractive.

Others’ personal preferences are outside of your control, so I wouldn’t worry about it, unless it’s a trait you want to change in yourself.

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By *elvet_OrchidWoman  over a year ago

Banbury

Bookmarked this one

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

there still has to be an attraction ??

But Surley an attraction can be formed with conversation. Not just pictures.

I mean if you meet to have fun with someone, then ain't you going to want some form of conversation before you meet, during and after.

Isn't it all about seducing the mind first, isn't that done with conversation? "

nope sorry the first thing that draws to a chat is attraction first but thats not the only thing.... im not going to jump into bed with someone i dont feel attracted to nope never

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

there still has to be an attraction ??

But Surley an attraction can be formed with conversation. Not just pictures.

I mean if you meet to have fun with someone, then ain't you going to want some form of conversation before you meet, during and after.

Isn't it all about seducing the mind first, isn't that done with conversation?

nope sorry the first thing that draws to a chat is attraction first but thats not the only thing.... im not going to jump into bed with someone i dont feel attracted to nope never"

and just to say my hubs is a 6ft4 chunky guy who i fell for very quickly years ago and still fancy the pants off him today

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By *anPsurreycoupleCouple  over a year ago

Surrey

I saw a interview with loads of ladies they had the choice of a one night stand with a guy ripped not a ounce fat on him or a chunky hunky 9 out of 10 will picked the gym going ripped guy

But when was asked the same ladies said they would prefer in a relationship the chunky hunk. won 9 out of 10

A lot might agree or disagree but I thought I would share what I had seen in the interview

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

See I'm mean it's an open opinion.

I'm quite happy in myself, so. I'm not aiming it to be about myself.

However the general observation, from a male perspective, when clicking on profiles is in the write ups it normal says... No fat or overweight men. I remember reading one that said 'fat or overweight, don't even bother, I mean why would I'... I remember thinking... Really...

Anyway in respect of speaking for myself, some messages on here can be right nasty. I remember posting a picture and had a male, yes male message me and say...'i ought to kill myself'...

Then I've also had a message from a couple saying 'absolutely disgusting, just cancel your profile'...

Preference on looks is down to the person I know, but that's why I like these forum posts as it brings the people who are more appricitive of the bigger male to the forefront.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"See I'm mean it's an open opinion.

I'm quite happy in myself, so. I'm not aiming it to be about myself.

However the general observation, from a male perspective, when clicking on profiles is in the write ups it normal says... No fat or overweight men. I remember reading one that said 'fat or overweight, don't even bother, I mean why would I'... I remember thinking... Really...

Anyway in respect of speaking for myself, some messages on here can be right nasty. I remember posting a picture and had a male, yes male message me and say...'i ought to kill myself'...

Then I've also had a message from a couple saying 'absolutely disgusting, just cancel your profile'...

Preference on looks is down to the person I know, but that's why I like these forum posts as it brings the people who are more appricitive of the bigger male to the forefront. "

if someone puts No fat or overweight men then thats there choice tho i dont agree with that being put on a profile ...op you say your happy with yourself but this is not the first time you posted this question ?? just use them profiles as a filter if i see a profile i dont like or a status i block and move on

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"See I'm mean it's an open opinion.

I'm quite happy in myself, so. I'm not aiming it to be about myself.

However the general observation, from a male perspective, when clicking on profiles is in the write ups it normal says... No fat or overweight men. I remember reading one that said 'fat or overweight, don't even bother, I mean why would I'... I remember thinking... Really...

Anyway in respect of speaking for myself, some messages on here can be right nasty. I remember posting a picture and had a male, yes male message me and say...'i ought to kill myself'...

Then I've also had a message from a couple saying 'absolutely disgusting, just cancel your profile'...

Preference on looks is down to the person I know, but that's why I like these forum posts as it brings the people who are more appricitive of the bigger male to the forefront.

if someone puts No fat or overweight men then thats there choice tho i dont agree with that being put on a profile ...op you say your happy with yourself but this is not the first time you posted this question ?? just use them profiles as a filter if i see a profile i dont like or a status i block and move on "

I 100% do, do that now. But when I was a very new member it was a little different.

As for regards to if I'm happy myself and my previous post. This post is in regards to the way it's portrayed on some people's profiles. The other post was the way bigger men are portrayed in general. Kinda the same rounded box subject, portrayed with a different outlook.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Big guy here but having no luck

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

its the same answer to most questions on here, some will like bigger men, some wont, its all about choice

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Big guy here but having no luck "

Join the other thousands of guys who also arent having any luck,dont forget being on fab doesnt garenty a shag, if you cant in real life you probably wont in here, my best advice is get yourself along to some socials and meet people, or try a club, they are starting to open now

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Definitely interested in this thread. Being a bit on the larger side myself. I like my exercise but I also REALLY like my food. I’m carrying extra timber but I can run a marathon and do a triathlon so it doesn’t take away my stamina.

Also I’m a fan of the curvier woman.

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By *ustustwo.1965Couple  over a year ago

.


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?"

Attraction is everything.

Some people may be interested, others not.

Simple really.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

See too reply to a few of the above posts.

Attraction may be everything. But how can you form an attraction on just a picture, Surley it's impossible for if you want to meet someone.

I mean regardless if thus bloke is a big guy. He could have the most amazing personality and charm you pants off. But isn't looked at twice because he's judged on a picture.

Also this post is aimed at some of the other bigger guys, who are maybe afraid or nervous to put themselves out there or put pictures up incase of ridicule. Hopefully it gives them the confidence to see there are other people out there that actually like bigger guys.

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By *nked_kittenWoman  over a year ago

Ankh Morpork

I’m fat myself and for me I fit better with less fat guys. I don’t like skinny guys though, then I feel like a whale. I want a happy middle ground.

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By *histle do nicelyMan  over a year ago

Glasgow South

We all like different shapes and sizes..The challenge on line is that its very shallow...Swipe left etc..

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple  over a year ago

Coventry

Folk are here to fulfil their sexual desires. I think for most clean decent good people is a must. But then such people exist in every size and shape. For many peoples desires physical attraction is important. Size and shape is a factor. But even if you fulfil this then facial details, body hair, hight etc may also be important. There's lot of research that suggests certain bodies are more desirable than others. The reasons for this may be cultural, evolutionarily, routed deep in societal norms. Also history shows what body is desirable has changed over history and varies from society to society. At the end of the day we can only piss with the dick we've got. Everyone likes someone different and to some a chunky guy is desirable. But even then people are often looking for more than just the right body type. For instance they may have a thing for chunky guys under 5 foot with ginger hair. Fab is difficult as a single guy. Obviously more so if your body type is not the most popular type. That is how it is. All you can do is keep putting your best foot forward until you meet the right person.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Attraction may be everything. But how can you form an attraction on just a picture, Surley it's impossible for if you want to meet someone.

I mean regardless if thus bloke is a big guy. He could have the most amazing personality and charm you pants off. But isn't looked at twice because he's judged on a picture. "

no attraction is the first thing you look for its a simple fact of life but to say attraction only then no ive met guys who look fantastic but have the personality of a brick there are several factors to picking a meet its different than finding a life partner but still needs attraction nobody is going to go with someone they dont visually like ...

when i go to work there are some people who are funny as fuck but ill not sleep with then as they dont attract...i think the problem is you see attraction as fit guys only so its not us women its you and your perception of things and attraction

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?"

This is the 2nd post I've seen you make on a similar topic. There's two things you need to know. It's not only bigger guys struggling, like anything some people dig it and some people don't.

A little advice if you don't mind me chipping in and to be clear I mean this in the best possible way. But stop focusing on the things you think are holding you back and start focusing on what you have to offer people as it comes across as infinitely more attractive than woe is me posts.

I'm a bigger guy and I'm not saying I'm killing it on here but I get chance to chat with loads of great people, some of it leads somewhere but a lot of it doesn't and that's okay.

I wish you the best of luck either way

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?

This is the 2nd post I've seen you make on a similar topic. There's two things you need to know. It's not only bigger guys struggling, like anything some people dig it and some people don't.

A little advice if you don't mind me chipping in and to be clear I mean this in the best possible way. But stop focusing on the things you think are holding you back and start focusing on what you have to offer people as it comes across as infinitely more attractive than woe is me posts.

I'm a bigger guy and I'm not saying I'm killing it on here but I get chance to chat with loads of great people, some of it leads somewhere but a lot of it doesn't and that's okay.

I wish you the best of luck either way "

very good advice ...nearly all guys struggle on here

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Attraction may be everything. But how can you form an attraction on just a picture, Surley it's impossible for if you want to meet someone.

I mean regardless if thus bloke is a big guy. He could have the most amazing personality and charm you pants off. But isn't looked at twice because he's judged on a picture.

no attraction is the first thing you look for its a simple fact of life but to say attraction only then no ive met guys who look fantastic but have the personality of a brick there are several factors to picking a meet its different than finding a life partner but still needs attraction nobody is going to go with someone they dont visually like ...

when i go to work there are some people who are funny as fuck but ill not sleep with then as they dont attract...i think the problem is you see attraction as fit guys only so its not us women its you and your perception of things and attraction"

I have to totally disagree with you. I work in an industry that puts all types of people together and I've seen, so called people who say 'he or she is not there type' fall for somebody souley based on there personality.

I don't see attraction as got guys only either. That's why I posed the question.. What is the off put of big guys....rather then asking it as a personally dedicated question.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Attraction may be everything. But how can you form an attraction on just a picture, Surley it's impossible for if you want to meet someone.

I mean regardless if thus bloke is a big guy. He could have the most amazing personality and charm you pants off. But isn't looked at twice because he's judged on a picture.

no attraction is the first thing you look for its a simple fact of life but to say attraction only then no ive met guys who look fantastic but have the personality of a brick there are several factors to picking a meet its different than finding a life partner but still needs attraction nobody is going to go with someone they dont visually like ...

when i go to work there are some people who are funny as fuck but ill not sleep with then as they dont attract...i think the problem is you see attraction as fit guys only so its not us women its you and your perception of things and attraction

I have to totally disagree with you. I work in an industry that puts all types of people together and I've seen, so called people who say 'he or she is not there type' fall for somebody souley based on there personality.

I don't see attraction as got guys only either. That's why I posed the question.. What is the off put of big guys....rather then asking it as a personally dedicated question. "

ok im out lol fab is going to be very hard work for you with that thinking you do realize your on a swinging site ?? its not matchmaker but i do however wish you the best of luck x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Attraction may be everything. But how can you form an attraction on just a picture, Surley it's impossible for if you want to meet someone.

I mean regardless if thus bloke is a big guy. He could have the most amazing personality and charm you pants off. But isn't looked at twice because he's judged on a picture.

no attraction is the first thing you look for its a simple fact of life but to say attraction only then no ive met guys who look fantastic but have the personality of a brick there are several factors to picking a meet its different than finding a life partner but still needs attraction nobody is going to go with someone they dont visually like ...

when i go to work there are some people who are funny as fuck but ill not sleep with then as they dont attract...i think the problem is you see attraction as fit guys only so its not us women its you and your perception of things and attraction

I have to totally disagree with you. I work in an industry that puts all types of people together and I've seen, so called people who say 'he or she is not there type' fall for somebody souley based on there personality.

I don't see attraction as got guys only either. That's why I posed the question.. What is the off put of big guys....rather then asking it as a personally dedicated question.

ok im out lol fab is going to be very hard work for you with that thinking you do realize your on a swinging site ?? its not matchmaker but i do however wish you the best of luck x"

Haha good debate and I do Appreciate your input and opinion. So thank you. I think sometimes that's what these forums are all about. x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting. "

But as long as the man can perform and remember sex isn't all about doing the in and out shake it all about and dash. Why would that be off putting?

I mean a man could lift his shirt up be slim and have a scare or something across his chest.. Wouldn't that, for sum be equally off-putting?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting. "

bit of a sad statement to make yet your profile states your well mannered yet this statement proves your not ...

= turnoff

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By *ustustwo.1965Couple  over a year ago

.


"See too reply to a few of the above posts.

Attraction may be everything. But how can you form an attraction on just a picture, Surley it's impossible for if you want to meet someone.

I mean regardless if thus bloke is a big guy. He could have the most amazing personality and charm you pants off. But isn't looked at twice because he's judged on a picture.

Also this post is aimed at some of the other bigger guys, who are maybe afraid or nervous to put themselves out there or put pictures up incase of ridicule. Hopefully it gives them the confidence to see there are other people out there that actually like bigger guys. "

The initial attraction is visual.

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By *ustustwo.1965Couple  over a year ago

.


"Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting.

But as long as the man can perform and remember sex isn't all about doing the in and out shake it all about and dash. Why would that be off putting?

I mean a man could lift his shirt up be slim and have a scare or something across his chest.. Wouldn't that, for sum be equally off-putting? "

We get it now.

You seem to be saying that people on here should fuck anyone whether they are attracted to them or not.

Right...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting.

But as long as the man can perform and remember sex isn't all about doing the in and out shake it all about and dash. Why would that be off putting?

I mean a man could lift his shirt up be slim and have a scare or something across his chest.. Wouldn't that, for sum be equally off-putting?

We get it now.

You seem to be saying that people on here should fuck anyone whether they are attracted to them or not.

Right..."

didnt you know that joining fab garenties you loads of hot girls queing up at your door, good where have you been

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting.

But as long as the man can perform and remember sex isn't all about doing the in and out shake it all about and dash. Why would that be off putting?

I mean a man could lift his shirt up be slim and have a scare or something across his chest.. Wouldn't that, for sum be equally off-putting? "

im covered in scars and i do ok

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Few sarcy comments...am I surprised er no!!

The guy is asking a genuine question and a few on here are taking it the wrong way which doesn't surprise me on here....

...if you have a great body, nice personality,modest etc then that's the full package or bif your a stunner but you've got the personality of a brick and your up your own arse being a stunner is pointless

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

he asked the question, not every answer is going to be what he wants, thats life, grow up

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Haha

Think it's you who needs to grow up and get out your own backside

And goodnight x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I think a few of these replies may need to re-read the original post.

This isn't aimed a been a personal question about myself. Because if it was I'd of emphasised the fact I was asking for me.

I was aiming this as a general question for all males of a bigger nature, as somewhere down the line a few (not all) n may have thought about the above post question and wondered why.

None of my replies are personally aimed unless stated, just examples/scenerios as a whole.

Everyone is entitled to there own opinion. Just please make sure you read the original post and look at the comment's before you think it's aimed a personal attack.

Have a nice day

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don’t know if it’s so much the stigma attached that is off putting as a stigma for most things is seen as off putting. more so I’d say the mental state/energy you portray in interactions with different people (maybe a woman you’re romantically interested in for example) where I found when I was a tubbier guy and different friends who are larger agreed, when you’re less healthy and overweight in this example, the energy/personality that you can portray may be in more of a negative sense (maybe self conscious or other factors relating to people being overweight/larger) that negative energy or self depreciating personality shines bright as day to other people which might be what you’re referring to as the stigma?

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

It's people's preferences just like anything else some will like heavier men some won't .It the same as women .If someone states their preferences on their profile and it doesn't fit with you then move on its what I do .

Personality counts for a lot on here and real life for me but I also have to be attracted to someone in the first place to chat.If it's someone I haven't seen or chatted to in the forum's then their profile is what I make my decision on .If their profile doesn't appeal then I won't answer them anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Haha

Think it's you who needs to grow up and get out your own backside

And goodnight x"

Really? did you even read what i said, and i think you will find most people agree with you

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Just for the records, I very much doubt that initial attraction be always visual and visual alone.

I have come across a number of guys on here who may not be athletic or tall or whatever is considered attractive, and I have found that some of those men who weren't "perfect" models (Let s face it ... women are not necessarily perfect either?), those men exuded an incredible sex appeal through their imaginative and erotic way of expressing themselves.

Some women, myself included, are attracted to a wide linguistic repertoire far more so than pure physical appearance.

An intelligent, intuitive man who is able to seduce the mind? Now I would be melting away so much more than through just looking at a picture, no matter how (conventionally) attractive the guy may look.

In this context, I find comments such as "having to lift a roll of fat to see the penis" unhelpful to be honest. I was with a guy for over a decade who would have been considered "fat" and he was the sexiest man I have ever met.

As always, different strokes for different folks.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Maybe it's having to lift a roll up to see the penis I imagine that's a bit of putting.

bit of a sad statement to make yet your profile states your well mannered yet this statement proves your not ...

= turnoff"

he asked a question I gave an answer nothing Ill mannered about that, I didn't aim it at anyone, what was my answer supposed to be?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mate,

Don’t get hung-up on it.

I know it’s easier said than done, but the reality is that it’s ‘different strokes for different folks’.

I used to have a much better physique than I do now, it was a lot of effort and (to be honest) I had very little reward from women I was interested in.

Fast-forward 10 years and I now have the epitome of a ‘Dad bod’ and I find that I get a lot more attention - I imagine it might have something to do with the fact men like me are seen as low-maintenance or non-threatening (and I don’t mean that in a physical way).

In the end - it comes down to your personality and confidence.

I’m sure you’re a lovely guy and I’m sure you’ll get your willy wet plenty of times on here or elsewhere if you relax and go with the flow.

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By *oneyBear100Couple  over a year ago

Gatwick area


"I think a few of these replies may need to re-read the original post.

This isn't aimed a been a personal question about myself. Because if it was I'd of emphasised the fact I was asking for me.

I was aiming this as a general question for all males of a bigger nature, as somewhere down the line a few (not all) n may have thought about the above post question and wondered why.

None of my replies are personally aimed unless stated, just examples/scenerios as a whole.

Everyone is entitled to there own opinion. Just please make sure you read the original post and look at the comment's before you think it's aimed a personal attack.

Have a nice day "

Some ladies like a chunky gent, some don't. Some want pure gym buff fantasy but you and I are not their target audience. Some will want a more cerebral connection and they are the people I connect with because size isn't that relevant.

Personally, I have a predilection for curves but enjoy a person rather than shape.

That said, two Weebles trying to bump uglies needs creativity

Bear

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Just for the records, I very much doubt that initial attraction be always visual and visual alone.

I have come across a number of guys on here who may not be athletic or tall or whatever is considered attractive, and I have found that some of those men who weren't "perfect" models (Let s face it ... women are not necessarily perfect either?), those men exuded an incredible sex appeal through their imaginative and erotic way of expressing themselves.

Some women, myself included, are attracted to a wide linguistic repertoire far more so than pure physical appearance.

An intelligent, intuitive man who is able to seduce the mind? Now I would be melting away so much more than through just looking at a picture, no matter how (conventionally) attractive the guy may look.

In this context, I find comments such as "having to lift a roll of fat to see the penis" unhelpful to be honest. I was with a guy for over a decade who would have been considered "fat" and he was the sexiest man I have ever met.

As always, different strokes for different folks. "

Couldn't of said it better myself, seduction starts with the mind.

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By *_Yeah19Couple  over a year ago

Lincoln

Purely just personal preference for attraction surely? Not sure you can necessarily say ‘why’ you don’t find someone/something attractive, you just don’t.

There certainly is some leeway though once you factor in the personality element and I could likely be won over if the whole package was there except for the bod. Totally aware that some with amazing bodies have nothing going on upstairs so it certainly does work both ways!

TB

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By *luttyLaylaWoman  over a year ago

North West


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?"

For many on here, my self very much included, it’s about physical attraction and that’s all.

I’m not here to converse and find attraction in personalities.

Just like there’s lots of men that like “curvy, bbw/ bigger... any word you wish to describe” there are women that like the same in men.

I don’t think there’s a stigma attached to being bigger in either sex. People just like it or don’t.

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple  over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

[Removed by poster at 23/06/21 13:39:31]

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple  over a year ago

Pembrokeshire


"So I'm quite interested to know, been a bigger guy/fat myself.

What's so off putting about a bigger man?

I mean, on a previous post there was alot mentioned about personality etc, should be the main thing, which I do agree.

I mean aslong as he's clean, tidy and well presentable.. whys there a stigma attached or an off put about a bigger man?"

I've never been interested in thinner folks, so I guess it's each to their own

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think from what I've seen and read on here in different threads it's seems to me that a lot of women (not all) that are interested in overweight chunky guys are ladies of a certain description so bbw,large,ample (nothing wrong with that)....but for me who is chunky/stocky/ wouldn't call myself fat/overweight I'm not attracted to the women mentioned above so I'm in a it of a catch 22....I tend to message or wink at women on here that have similar looks to the women I've been with in real life but on here they don't tend to be interested in my type....don't get me wrong the women on here get so many offers on here that your chances are basically slim to none haha

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"

I’m not here to converse and find attraction in personalities.

Just like there’s lots of men that like “curvy, bbw/ bigger... any word you wish to describe” there are women that like the same in men.

I don’t think there’s a stigma attached to being bigger in either sex. People just like it or don’t. "

"I’m not here to converse and find attraction in personalities."

I think that is probably where the differences lie - while I would not say I am here to converse, conversation is definitely very much part of meeting people before becoming intimate - I could not imagine sex without some connection but some people prefer it this way.

"I don’t think there’s a stigma attached to being bigger in either sex. People just like it or don’t."

Absolutely agree with you here - besides the world (and fabs) would be boring if it was full of gym bunnies or chunkier people.

Diversity makes life (and fabs interesting!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I’m not here to converse and find attraction in personalities.

Just like there’s lots of men that like “curvy, bbw/ bigger... any word you wish to describe” there are women that like the same in men.

I don’t think there’s a stigma attached to being bigger in either sex. People just like it or don’t.

"I’m not here to converse and find attraction in personalities."

I think that is probably where the differences lie - while I would not say I am here to converse, conversation is definitely very much part of meeting people before becoming intimate - I could not imagine sex without some connection but some people prefer it this way.

"I don’t think there’s a stigma attached to being bigger in either sex. People just like it or don’t."

Absolutely agree with you here - besides the world (and fabs) would be boring if it was full of gym bunnies or chunkier people.

Diversity makes life (and fabs interesting!

"

Totally agree

I'd sooner have sex with a women who had a bubbly personality than a women who was far more attractive but had the personality of a brick

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sadly we are in a society that will judge someone on sight alone before knowing someone. We've been at swingers clubs and you can see people turning away from you. Everyone has a preference, be that big, small, short, tall, pink or green. You will hit it off with some, and not with others

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/06/21 14:17:02]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sadly we are in a society that will judge someone on sight alone before knowing someone. We've been at swingers clubs and you can see people turning away from you. Everyone has a preference, be that big, small, short, tall, pink or green. You will hit it off with some, and not with others "

You see now what you said above about clubs is interesting.

Been a bigger guy, I've just been accepted as a member for Xtasia. The thing thats stopping me from Going, is what you said about people turning away.

I mean I'm a very socialable person, an that's all we can do at the moment. But the thought I've been constantly turned away from, is a little off putting.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Sadly we are in a society that will judge someone on sight alone before knowing someone. We've been at swingers clubs and you can see people turning away from you. Everyone has a preference, be that big, small, short, tall, pink or green. You will hit it off with some, and not with others

You see now what you said above about clubs is interesting.

Been a bigger guy, I've just been accepted as a member for Xtasia. The thing thats stopping me from Going, is what you said about people turning away.

I mean I'm a very socialable person, an that's all we can do at the moment. But the thought I've been constantly turned away from, is a little off putting. "

Don't be put off going, far from it. As said, there will be people that like you and people that don't. When you go. Just socialise a lot and see where that goes

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By *luttyLaylaWoman  over a year ago

North West


"Sadly we are in a society that will judge someone on sight alone before knowing someone. We've been at swingers clubs and you can see people turning away from you. Everyone has a preference, be that big, small, short, tall, pink or green. You will hit it off with some, and not with others

You see now what you said above about clubs is interesting.

Been a bigger guy, I've just been accepted as a member for Xtasia. The thing thats stopping me from Going, is what you said about people turning away.

I mean I'm a very socialable person, an that's all we can do at the moment. But the thought I've been constantly turned away from, is a little off putting. "

But that’s not your problem.

You can’t control people’s reactions. I’d hate to think I’d miss out on something because someone else might not like me.

Anyone who’s purposely rude to someone because of any characteristic isn’t the kind of person you’d want to socialise with anyway lol!

If I’m looking to date then of course personality and conversation is priority.

On here for me it isn’t- i don’t see that as a sad thing about society. And I don’t know anyone in any clubs I’ve attended who has been nasty or rude because of their preferences, I think you’ll find you’d fit right in! X

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sadly we are in a society that will judge someone on sight alone before knowing someone. We've been at swingers clubs and you can see people turning away from you. Everyone has a preference, be that big, small, short, tall, pink or green. You will hit it off with some, and not with others

You see now what you said above about clubs is interesting.

Been a bigger guy, I've just been accepted as a member for Xtasia. The thing thats stopping me from Going, is what you said about people turning away.

I mean I'm a very socialable person, an that's all we can do at the moment. But the thought I've been constantly turned away from, is a little off putting.

Don't be put off going, far from it. As said, there will be people that like you and people that don't. When you go. Just socialise a lot and see where that goes "

I am Going to give it a go, probably this weekend. You've gotta try everything once haven't you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

OP plenty of people said they liked big guys in your last post. Yet here you are again asking the same questions.

There is nothing off putting about a big guy who has confidence to pull it off. Like I said on the previous post I know a guy who is fat who doesn’t struggle at all.

What’s off putting is your insecurities around it. As a fat girl I do get those insecurities too but keeping posting and being negative about yourself isn’t doing you any favours

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Sadly we are in a society that will judge someone on sight alone before knowing someone. We've been at swingers clubs and you can see people turning away from you. Everyone has a preference, be that big, small, short, tall, pink or green. You will hit it off with some, and not with others "

This doesn't necessarily mean they aren't attracted to your body type... I am attracted to faces regardless of anything bar personality... And you would need attractive ones of both, for me to be interested in anything other than talking

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"OP plenty of people said they liked big guys in your last post. Yet here you are again asking the same questions.

There is nothing off putting about a big guy who has confidence to pull it off. Like I said on the previous post I know a guy who is fat who doesn’t struggle at all.

What’s off putting is your insecurities around it. As a fat girl I do get those insecurities too but keeping posting and being negative about yourself isn’t doing you any favours "

The two posts were very different. This posts is asking what the off puts for going with a bigger guy are.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"OP plenty of people said they liked big guys in your last post. Yet here you are again asking the same questions.

There is nothing off putting about a big guy who has confidence to pull it off. Like I said on the previous post I know a guy who is fat who doesn’t struggle at all.

What’s off putting is your insecurities around it. As a fat girl I do get those insecurities too but keeping posting and being negative about yourself isn’t doing you any favours "

May I also add there are plenty and plenty of posts that duplicate the exact questions that have been asked previously also.

The last post had an abundance of questions added to it.

One was yes, what is the off put,

Two was why feel the need to. Send insulting messages.

And three was straight men contacting bigger men when clearly labelled as straight on there profile.

This post is one direct question.

It's just many have steamed away and bought in other topic factors.

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman  over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Mostly physical restrictions for me, I don't want to be squashed, I'm only little, they'd be too wide for me.

I always used to go for bigger build (rugby/body builder) never been keen on obese men, it's just not attractive to me.

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