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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Bit of a backstory, I have only been with one man (been with a few women but that is another story) I was always told "only have sex with the man you love", but for a while now I have wondered if I could be missing something by only having been with one man, and a mmf looks like fun, but if I was to have sex with another man I think I would have to start slowly, maybe just kissing on the first meet and build from there, or does that sound a bit like something teenagers do?
Or are there others that think the same as me or started that way? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wonder if it might be an idea to start with a soft swap couple? (Disclaimer - that's not us btw!)"
What is soft swap? I have been told a few different definitions, one was two couples in same room but stay with own partners, two was swapping for anything but penetrative sex. |
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You move at your pace OP and if others want to move faster then they are not the right one for you. If you need to go slowly starting with social moving to a social+kissing then adding more and more at your comfortable pace then that's what you do. If the other party ain't happy they no where the door is and don't let it hit ya on way out.
Happy hunting for the right candidates |
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By *iliciousCouple
over a year ago
Sussex/Surrey |
"Wonder if it might be an idea to start with a soft swap couple? (Disclaimer - that's not us btw!)
What is soft swap? I have been told a few different definitions, one was two couples in same room but stay with own partners, two was swapping for anything but penetrative sex."
Usually regarded as the second of the two scenarios you describe. Just occurred it might be a good intro for you, and if the woman was bi then also your thing? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wonder if it might be an idea to start with a soft swap couple? (Disclaimer - that's not us btw!)
What is soft swap? I have been told a few different definitions, one was two couples in same room but stay with own partners, two was swapping for anything but penetrative sex.
Usually regarded as the second of the two scenarios you describe. Just occurred it might be a good intro for you, and if the woman was bi then also your thing?"
Thank you.
It might be something I would think about once I settled into it a bit. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is soft swap? I have been told a few different definitions, one was two couples in same room but stay with own partners, two was swapping for anything but penetrative sex."
As I understand it, 'Soft Swing' is where two couples have sex in the same room but not with each other.
'Soft Swap' is the same but where partners swap, but don't have full sex.
And 'Full Swing' is where they do swap partners and they do have sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My Mum has always been quite uptight about sex (she's only ever been with my Dad), had me believing that is was massively important losing your virginity to the right person and you didn't sleep around. Her sex advice to me was "lie back and think of England and it's alright if they go slow"
Thankfully, I learnt otherwise... I know she'd be disgusted if I was on here but it's my life and I love sex. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My Mum has always been quite uptight about sex (she's only ever been with my Dad), had me believing that is was massively important losing your virginity to the right person and you didn't sleep around. Her sex advice to me was "lie back and think of England and it's alright if they go slow"
Thankfully, I learnt otherwise... I know she'd be disgusted if I was on here but it's my life and I love sex. "
My mother was the same. When I was about 15/16 two girls I went to school with came out as a couple, my mother tried to ban me from even talking to them incase they made me a lesbian (if only she had known I had been kissing another girl around that time).
When I got with my man when I was 18, my mother tried to tell me that he won't be interested in me if I am a virgin, and said I should lie to him and say I have done alsorts sexually, when I look back now I see how messed up she was sexually. |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
If clubs were open my advice would be to give one a go. They're safe and you can do as much or as little as you like. Just watching is fine until you pluck up courage to join in with something that appeals to you. |
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"Bit of a backstory, I have only been with one man (been with a few women but that is another story) I was always told "only have sex with the man you love", but for a while now I have wondered if I could be missing something by only having been with one man, and a mmf looks like fun, but if I was to have sex with another man I think I would have to start slowly, maybe just kissing on the first meet and build from there, or does that sound a bit like something teenagers do?
Or are there others that think the same as me or started that way?"
Sounds perfectly reasonable to me especially if you make that clear beforehand. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Bit of a backstory, I have only been with one man (been with a few women but that is another story) I was always told "only have sex with the man you love", but for a while now I have wondered if I could be missing something by only having been with one man, and a mmf looks like fun, but if I was to have sex with another man I think I would have to start slowly, maybe just kissing on the first meet and build from there, or does that sound a bit like something teenagers do?
Or are there others that think the same as me or started that way?
Sounds perfectly reasonable to me especially if you make that clear beforehand. "
So I should make it clear in my profile or in messages, or both just to be sure? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Take things at your pace. My wife started it slowly with her meets, just kissing at first, then oral and then sex. Its all about what you as a couple feel comfortable with. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Try thinking of it slightly differently, only "make love" with the one person in your life, have "sex" with whoever you wish. "
That is what my husband said. |
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