FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Rejecting ppl on fab
Rejecting ppl on fab
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Personally speaking I find it very hard to tell someone on fab I'm not interested in them. I try my best to have my bio in such a way so that I wouldn't be in a position to have to tell them, they're not my type or I'm not interested.
Does anyone else have a problem with politely declining someone on fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes.
This is something that gets me down a lot when using online dating sites.
It's not a nice feeling at all when you have to keeping turning down genuine people one after another.
Not a good feeling and makes me sad at times  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes.
This is something that gets me down a lot when using online dating sites.
It's not a nice feeling at all when you have to keeping turning down genuine people one after another.
Not a good feeling and makes me sad at times "
Ditto |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes.
This is something that gets me down a lot when using online dating sites.
It's not a nice feeling at all when you have to keeping turning down genuine people one after another.
Not a good feeling and makes me sad at times
Ditto"
It's the only aspect of online dating I don't like.
I'm a really nice person in real life, I always try to help people and be a source of joy to brighten peoples day.
But when I turn people down on here and dash their hopes, it goes against my personality.
It's my pet hate
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
When we were meeting it was easy. We just didn't reply if an opening message wasn't for us, much in the same way we didn't reply to junk mail that dropped through the letterbox and quickly ended telesales phone calls.
Just because you have a profile it doesn't mean you have a responsibility to reply to everyone. There shouldn't be any guilt.
Do you feel more guilty if they've sent a long message and less guilty if it's a quick one liner?
Do you feel more guilty if they meet some but not all of your preferences and less guilty if they meet none?
Sure it would be nice if everyone got a detailed, polite reply explaining exactly why you're not interested, but for every person that could accept that and call it quits there'd be another arguing why you're wrong, that they meant something else in their opening message and that you should reconsider.
Life's too short for that shit.
A |
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Not that it happens that often, I don't like saying no to people either.
That could be because, as the one who is usually turned down, I am acutely aware of how it feels and so don't want to cause anyone else to feel the same way. Or else I'm just not tough enough, or gqbe enough self confidence to ask for what I actually want.
The alternative is leading someone on who I'm not that into, or worse ending up having sex with someone I don't want to be with
Time to grow a pair, I suppose |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Haha do guys actually get women message them first ? "
We used to message guys when we were meeting. It meant we'd be contacting people we were potentially interested in, rather than sitting back and having to wade through messages from people we weren't.
We got knocked back at times or messages deleted. Didn't worry us.
Being proactive offers a bigger chance of finding suitable company.
If more couples and women did it and blocked incoming messages from men they'd probably find it easier to source the right company and have less reason to complain about unwanted attention.
But then some like the volume of attention they get on here even if its from people they'd never in a million years meet.
A |
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It’s easy at the moment as even my phone has the ‘not meeting currently’ quote I use regularly to answer messages I receive, as a repeated text.
Outside of the pandemic, when I would put up a ‘meet today’ notification on my profile, I did find it difficult to turn some people down.
Agree with previous comment, leading someone on is surely worse though. |
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"Personally speaking I find it very hard to tell someone on fab I'm not interested in them. I try my best to have my bio in such a way so that I wouldn't be in a position to have to tell them, they're not my type or I'm not interested.
I don't reply to them if I'm being honest because sometimes even a simple thank you but no thanks isn't enough
Does anyone else have a problem with politely declining someone on fab"
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MrD does, I dont have a problem saying it. Which is unusual as MrD is the more outspoken one.
I play bad cop on here! He chats to people we would not be interested in ye see, I dont. Feel its not fair to chat if we are never going to be keen. I am very polite but reject people.
MsD |
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I don’t like to ignore people so I send a this and hope it makes them smile 
Hi there,
You have reached the answering machine of Bessie and are 1208 in the que. Don’t be disheartened I am a pretty fast worker. However should I actually accept all that cock before I get to you, bring a couple of dunlop tyres to Chuck
Into my growler. It will probably then resemble a wizards sleeve by the time you get here and be a bit slack , at best bring a mop and bucket
Things to consider while you wait...
1. Did you read my profile properly? If so you will see I’m here socially and not looking to meet. I know it’s heart breaking that your not going to witness the gaping cavern, likened to a yawning mouth of an elderly hippo, which would have been my love bucket in it’s sloppy glory but it’s probably is for the best. We made have had to tie a plank to your arse in case you fell in.
2. Did you read the profile and pic out the bits you wanted to read and skipped the rest? This normally results in the problem of people who could not accommodate messaging me when I couldn’t even if I was wanting a ride on your glorious pole. Yes I’m fully aware of the dogging option and the thrill it can bring but if I wanted to make people laugh with my various fuck faces I’d have taken up stand up comedy.Yes we could get all steamy in your Ford Fiesta but I’m not a little woman and when I take my clothes off I expand and spread out... it would be like setting a wet inflatable off, air bags everywhere. I know there’s hotels but I’m tight as fuck (possibly the only place I may add) to spring for a hotel and I just dint think the premier inn would approve my sexual trip advisor reports.
3. Are you local. I mean really hypothetically speaking if I chose to be all wanton and belly splash into the pool of willys on offer on my doorstep is not where I would start. I cannot possibly imagine the horror of handing over my tube of anusol over the counter to someone I’d let in to my holiest of holes on a Saturday morning. I don’t think my heart would take the strain bumping into a person coming out of Iceland and giving eye contact knowing the day before I’d ridden them like the last length of the grand national. I’m kidding ... I don’t get on top
I do thank you very much for taking the time to message me and know that it’s appreciated that you like a big old bird . I hope this rejection notice makes you smile and get over this loss and that you haven’t felt plain ignored and gone unanswered.
Much lust
Bessie xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Haha do guys actually get women message them first ? "
Women and couples msg me first quite often tbh, but I've put up what I like and don't like in the hopes it would lead to me not having to reject ppl too often.
But when I first came on fab, it was a bit relentless and it was a lot tbh but since I've done a proper bio it's more manageable now. |
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I can find it an issue but it's for everyone's best, as it helps them to put their effort into the right places. If I hold in mind that it helps them, it feels more positive. If I lost the plot, I'd just block
The anxiety would be helped if there was a fab standard rejection option including message and block. And cake and coffee or tea |
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By *urvyKattWoman
over a year ago
Dumfriesshire |
"I don’t like to ignore people so I send a this and hope it makes them smile
Hi there,
You have reached the answering machine of Bessie and are 1208 in the que. Don’t be disheartened I am a pretty fast worker. However should I actually accept all that cock before I get to you, bring a couple of dunlop tyres to Chuck
Into my growler. It will probably then resemble a wizards sleeve by the time you get here and be a bit slack , at best bring a mop and bucket
Things to consider while you wait...
1. Did you read my profile properly? If so you will see I’m here socially and not looking to meet. I know it’s heart breaking that your not going to witness the gaping cavern, likened to a yawning mouth of an elderly hippo, which would have been my love bucket in it’s sloppy glory but it’s probably is for the best. We made have had to tie a plank to your arse in case you fell in.
2. Did you read the profile and pic out the bits you wanted to read and skipped the rest? This normally results in the problem of people who could not accommodate messaging me when I couldn’t even if I was wanting a ride on your glorious pole. Yes I’m fully aware of the dogging option and the thrill it can bring but if I wanted to make people laugh with my various fuck faces I’d have taken up stand up comedy.Yes we could get all steamy in your Ford Fiesta but I’m not a little woman and when I take my clothes off I expand and spread out... it would be like setting a wet inflatable off, air bags everywhere. I know there’s hotels but I’m tight as fuck (possibly the only place I may add) to spring for a hotel and I just dint think the premier inn would approve my sexual trip advisor reports.
3. Are you local. I mean really hypothetically speaking if I chose to be all wanton and belly splash into the pool of willys on offer on my doorstep is not where I would start. I cannot possibly imagine the horror of handing over my tube of anusol over the counter to someone I’d let in to my holiest of holes on a Saturday morning. I don’t think my heart would take the strain bumping into a person coming out of Iceland and giving eye contact knowing the day before I’d ridden them like the last length of the grand national. I’m kidding ... I don’t get on top
I do thank you very much for taking the time to message me and know that it’s appreciated that you like a big old bird . I hope this rejection notice makes you smile and get over this loss and that you haven’t felt plain ignored and gone unanswered.
Much lust
Bessie xxx"
This is class, absolutely fecking hilarious  |
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After some time you can be really tired on responding to the messages.
At least half of them are because someone did not read our profile.
Or messages like “can we have a sex?”.... “do you like my dick”....
Not sure what kind of messages men receive. But we got many and most of them are from the people out of our preferences. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"MrD does, I dont have a problem saying it. Which is unusual as MrD is the more outspoken one.
I play bad cop on here! He chats to people we would not be interested in ye see, I dont. Feel its not fair to chat if we are never going to be keen. I am very polite but reject people.
MsD"
This happens a lot. I’ve chatted to the male half of the couple for a week or two and it’s been getting more and more positive until, “sorry mate. Just shown the Mrs your pics and she’s not keen”.
From then on, I always ask who I’m chatting to and if both parties have seen my profile
As for the topic, anyone message if me, who I’ve not been keen on, has generally taken rejection in good spirits. Generally this has been couples who are almost getting their pension- not my thing. There are the odd exceptions, where the following message is invariably something about me thinking I’m gods gift and being blocked |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it all comes down to how you or phrase your response. We've all had rejections and rejected other people on here. If your honest and polite then surely there can't be any butthurt reactions to your rejections. |
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