FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Accommadate.
Accommadate.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over. |
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"Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over."
Don't ask them then invite them over to your house. Afterall you do accommadate or don't you?. |
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"Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over."
Plenty of fake couples so that alone is no guarantee.
I'd say if four out of four let you down with meets you need to do more due diligence with your selection process
Plenty of good guys on here |
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I say can't accommodate but actually can if the situation is right and the other party can be trusted to be quiet and discrete. My partner is taking a break from swinging for a couple of months and very nosey/unpleasant neighbours add to the issues. On the other hand I had a young lady stay over a few nights  . Yes many guys here are screwing around behind their partners backs sadly, I'm not one of them though, she knows about every meet I have and fully supports it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over."
What crap excuse? Covid?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Crystal likes to meet guys on her own which we support.
Hence looking at the guys who say they can accommadate as she has gone past the quick fuck in a car.
Once chatting it is obivious they can't as they soon start fishing about us accommadating.
Just don't lie and waste our time is all i was saying.
It is all simple really. |
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"I totally get where your coming from OP,I've had all the excuses thrown at me,now I just think if a guy can't accom that they have a wife or gf at home"
Divorced (8yrs) dad to 2 lads here - yes I could accom but you wouldn’t want a couple of 6ft teenagers listening in I guess?
Give folk a chance, not everyone on here is cheating !!  |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Crystal likes to meet guys on her own which we support.
Hence looking at the guys who say they can accommadate as she has gone past the quick fuck in a car.
Once chatting it is obivious they can't as they soon start fishing about us accommadating.
Just don't lie and waste our time is all i was saying.
It is all simple really."
If you can't or don't want to accommodate, maybe uncheck the box in your settings, it would make things clearer for them? |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"I totally get where your coming from OP,I've had all the excuses thrown at me,now I just think if a guy can't accom that they have a wife or gf at home
Divorced (8yrs) dad to 2 lads here - yes I could accom but you wouldn’t want a couple of 6ft teenagers listening in I guess?
Give folk a chance, not everyone on here is cheating !! "
Lots of reasons for not accommodating, it's not only just guys cheating. Could be housemates, family members, kids, all sorts. People need to stop instantly jumping to conclusions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can accommodate and happy to do so. Happy to chat on phone etc first but I have two daughters who occasionally stay over but don’t live with me. I normally know well in advance and would let people know if circumstances change. The other thing and it works all ways is on a first meet you are inviting strangers to your home and sometimes if it doesn’t feel right people may cancel. I appreciate we are all different but I do find people are also very quick to judge |
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I think some of you are going off piste with OP's original point - we all know some have genuine reasons for not accommodating, the gripe is when guys say they can but when actually trying to meet all the BS excuses come waffling out.......
Single Bloke: Hi, How are you?
Us: Nice profile, straight to the point, can you accommodate like it says in your profile?
Single Bloke: Sure, no problems, can accommodate any time
Us: OK, we'd like to meet, we are flexible so when is a good time for us to meet (at yours)?
Single Bloke: Errmmmm......
Sooooooo frustrating, especially yrs ago when we had to sort sitters - hence why we gave up and just spent all our time meeting guys at clubs, but due to current shit-storm we are considering a meet in a few weeks, but all the old excuses are now trotting out - the best this week: "I'm not happy you coming to mine in a few weeks 'cos of COVID but I can cum to yours TONIGHT if you want?" - instant block! |
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"I'm not sure why people seem to think men should feel safe bringing strangers into their home, any more than a woman would?
"
point of post is why say on profile you can accommodate if you can't or won't |
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"I'm not sure why people seem to think men should feel safe bringing strangers into their home, any more than a woman would?
point of post is why say on profile you can accommodate if you can't or won't "
Well, I CAN. Doesn't mean I WILL, especially when first meeting someone.
So, if I say can't, there are worse assumptions. Stating why or why not on profile is an explanation, but then come the comments of--is that the truth, or is there a spouse hidden away.
Like listing "interests," it doesn't mean you're going to do it.
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
It's not all men, but have had this in past. They have can accom, but when arranging a meet long list family suddenly visiting or some excuse
Be honest, saves wasting people's time, if they can't accom either |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can and will accommodate but for the love of God.... if you go to someone’s house please bring a bottle of whatever you’re drinking and some food.....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not sure why people seem to think men should feel safe bringing strangers into their home, any more than a woman would?
point of post is why say on profile you can accommodate if you can't or won't
Well, I CAN. Doesn't mean I WILL, especially when first meeting someone.
So, if I say can't, there are worse assumptions. Stating why or why not on profile is an explanation, but then come the comments of--is that the truth, or is there a spouse hidden away.
Like listing "interests," it doesn't mean you're going to do it.
"
  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I cannot accommodate, but if ou read my profile it tells you why I can't, I'm honest and would expect all others to be so, we are all here for the same thing ..... I think X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I totally get where your coming from OP,I've had all the excuses thrown at me,now I just think if a guy can't accom that they have a wife or gf at home
Divorced (8yrs) dad to 2 lads here - yes I could accom but you wouldn’t want a couple of 6ft teenagers listening in I guess?
Give folk a chance, not everyone on here is cheating !! "
Same here, I got 2 son's in Thier 20's living home xx |
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"I totally get where your coming from OP,I've had all the excuses thrown at me,now I just think if a guy can't accom that they have a wife or gf at home"
Some of us are single dad's! So tar us all with the same brush.  |
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Again, after reading above comments from men: Why should men be expected to invite a random woman or couple into their home, when many/most would understand why a woman wouldn't????
Crazies come in all shapes, sizes, and genders.
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"think people are missing the op point, someone said they could accom then suddenly couldnd, very different to not being able to"
Because it's expected that men can accommodate. Just because they CAN, doesn't mean the have to. Same as women. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I'm not sure why people seem to think men should feel safe bringing strangers into their home, any more than a woman would?
point of post is why say on profile you can accommodate if you can't or won't "
The OP themselves say they can accommodate but won't for the single guys they want to meet, why is it different for them? |
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"I'm not sure why people seem to think men should feel safe bringing strangers into their home, any more than a woman would?
point of post is why say on profile you can accommodate if you can't or won't
The OP themselves say they can accommodate but won't for the single guys they want to meet, why is it different for them? "
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"I'm not sure why people seem to think men should feel safe bringing strangers into their home, any more than a woman would?
point of post is why say on profile you can accommodate if you can't or won't
The OP themselves say they can accommodate but won't for the single guys they want to meet, why is it different for them? "
Pot, kettle and black springs to mind here. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own.
Hence in our profile it says that so we aren't being judgemental but fed up with fellas leading her on a merry dance saying that they can accommadate then when asked what day come up up with some bullshit excuse after she has made arrangments to meet and taken time to get ready.
Just be honest is all we are saying! |
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We are now looking for guts who can accommodate, if they cant straight delete button , and we understand some are divorced and have kids , so a needle in a haystack we think to find a bi top or a bi couple which can accommodate lol ahh well we can only hope |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own.
Hence in our profile it says that so we aren't being judgemental but fed up with fellas leading her on a merry dance saying that they can accommadate then when asked what day come up up with some bullshit excuse after she has made arrangments to meet and taken time to get ready.
Just be honest is all we are saying!"
I can agree with that but it doesn't automatically assume that all men have wives at home etc. I will not accommodate as I have nosey neighbours and also some want to keep the lifestyle out of my house.. What about a hotel? |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Because they are attached. I bet they can only meet during the day and not at weekends too lol. "
Lots of reasons have been given in other posts on this thread, as well as the one you just stated.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over."
couples are just as bad and opinionated. they believe swinging is exclusive for they only. yet they came into this world alone and will leave it alone.
personally after seeing your damning post id avoid you like the plague and im sure any decent guy would so you are left with the crap that fucks you about. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not all men, but have had this in past. They have can accom, but when arranging a meet long list family suddenly visiting or some excuse
Be honest, saves wasting people's time, if they can't accom either "
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own.
Hence in our profile it says that so we aren't being judgemental but fed up with fellas leading her on a merry dance saying that they can accommadate then when asked what day come up up with some bullshit excuse after she has made arrangments to meet and taken time to get ready.
Just be honest is all we are saying!"
You could always go out and give crystal space to do her thing |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own.
Hence in our profile it says that so we aren't being judgemental but fed up with fellas leading her on a merry dance saying that they can accommadate then when asked what day come up up with some bullshit excuse after she has made arrangments to meet and taken time to get ready.
Just be honest is all we are saying!"
So the meet has been arranged? On the day of the meet they cancel? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own.
Hence in our profile it says that so we aren't being judgemental but fed up with fellas leading her on a merry dance saying that they can accommadate then when asked what day come up up with some bullshit excuse after she has made arrangments to meet and taken time to get ready.
Just be honest is all we are saying!"
I don't think the 'being able to accommodate' is the issue. It sounds to me like the type of men who have no intention of meeting and just want wank chat.
Do you talk about sex or send any pics when you are chatting to them? I never do either- it puts off the ones who are just wanking.  |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own.
Hence in our profile it says that so we aren't being judgemental but fed up with fellas leading her on a merry dance saying that they can accommadate then when asked what day come up up with some bullshit excuse after she has made arrangments to meet and taken time to get ready.
Just be honest is all we are saying!
I don't think the 'being able to accommodate' is the issue. It sounds to me like the type of men who have no intention of meeting and just want wank chat.
Do you talk about sex or send any pics when you are chatting to them? I never do either- it puts off the ones who are just wanking. "
This |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Just had another guy who said to Crystal they would accommodate her or get a hotel this Thursday and guess what?
Yep gone quiet for the last 2 days even tho we asked if the meet was still on.
Promised the world haha. We didn't send him any wank pics so couples it is as we found them to be more honest and reliable.
Rant over@ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well to be honest most of the sensible people on the site arent meeting right now for obvious reasons. So you are likely chatting to a lot of the fantasists on here.
P.S Im not having a dig at you guys or anyone for meeting. Its your lives to do with as you see fit. |
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By *ea wangMan
over a year ago
scunthorpe |
I rarely accommodate as I live in a shared house so find it easier to travel but then u get those who can neither accommodate or travel and you think we'll how does that work for you,op I can understand your frustration but have you thought hang on 4/5 guys have said they can now they can't that maybe something you've said may have made them change their minds or maybe they perceived you were a little to forward or pushy ,do u arrange to meet after a few messages or do u take your time and build a rapport over days/weeks,maybe your too forward or maybe they're too nervous to meet who knows but I guarantee you will find it no easier with couples |
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I'd be suspicious too op, if the accommodate is only occasionally you'd think they would be able to arrange a meet around it? I personally can always accommodate so please don't lump all single guys in together!  |
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By *ea wangMan
over a year ago
scunthorpe |
Having looked at your profile op I can see you state what you want but it does seem the way you word it can be construed as blunt and forceful and maybe when your exchanging messages this is the impression you give ,it may just be my opinion and others will probably disagree but then that's fab for you |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Maybe they don't want to accomadate complete strangers the first time they meet them.It is their home after all.
I can accomadate I just choose not to bring people I don't know well to my home.
A hotel meet is a lot safer until you get to know someone.
I don't see why single guys get so much agro because they dont want strangers in their home yet it is okay for couples and single women not to . Most seem to immediately jump on the oh they must be attached while quite often that is not the case. There are plenty of other factors including privacy why people won't even if they saynit in their profile they do. |
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"Maybe they don't want to accomadate complete strangers the first time they meet them.It is their home after all.
I can accomadate I just choose not to bring people I don't know well to my home.
A hotel meet is a lot safer until you get to know someone.
I don't see why single guys get so much agro because they dont want strangers in their home yet it is okay for couples and single women not to . Most seem to immediately jump on the oh they must be attached while quite often that is not the case. There are plenty of other factors including privacy why people won't even if they saynit in their profile they do. "
Thanks for supporting- you’re spot on! xx |
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"Ok. But so what if a guy is married? This is a swinging site not a socially judgemental place. Are any of us to be judge and jury. It’s the fun of swinging that this place is about.
Jack"
Swinging isn't cheating.
It's a swinging site. Not a cheating site.
People 100% have the right to know and refuse to meet cheaters. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We do accommadate at ours when we both want to meet people but Crystal likes to meet guys on her own."
Tow things... firstly, a bit more discussion early on can avoid disappointment later. Secondly... have you ever heard of a hotel?
As an immigrant to this country, I appreciate the welcome I've received in all my years here (we'll gloss over the brain fart that was Brexit). However, when I am invited into somebodies home, I think that is a privilege. That's somebodies safe place, their own space, their life. We should perhaps think of this more.
Sorry OP, but I think you need to do more research with potential meets, and be prepared to make an effort in turn. Plus, if you get a hotel, neither party has to wash the sheets after. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The guys who we have spoken to were fine right up to a couple or day before Crystal was due to meet.
She wasn't pushy at all and did ask if they could accommodate and all 5 replied yes no problems at all hence happy days.
Then to go silent and not reply even tho they have been online is just rude or is it us?
My gripe is just be honest and say if you can't.
Is that asking to much i say! |
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A lot of people use the ability to accommodate as a filter when meeting single men. It is the easiest way to out the cheaters. I can understand people being a bit miffed if it turns out they can't.
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I'm confused why people are saying the OP needs to understand some people can't accommodate.
They understand that.
But if people are saying they can.. they're well within their rights to expect them to be able to. If some guys are saying they can and will accommodate but then won't actually do.. that's on the guys, not on the OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not all guys are cheats some are but some might just be busy or something might of come up, that does happen that’s life. Possibly the nerves got the better of them or they live with family or housemates or yes they are time wasters! But if it’s a no show just block and carry on x |
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I can always catch them out
1) i always ask for a FACE piccy first not a dick one
U seen one u seen them all
2) if they state the 'CANNOT ACCOMMODATE' i will always ask if they are single
3) then on their reply if they say they are then will ask do they live with anyone
Ok if they say fsmily, kids love there, with house mate,
But if they say they ARE NOT SINGLE
They can fuck off
Why lie
Just like a lot of 'COUPLES' on here
If so why do a lot just have photos of one of the sex on
Dont see why u lie
Evrn when u say ur single but u got a gf or wife
One day u will all get found out
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is the easiest way to out the cheaters."
So the only valid reason for a single man not to be able to accommodate is because they are a cheater? But a single woman clearly has other valid reasons that no single male could possibly have?
Research your potential meets... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But if people are saying they can.. they're well within their rights to expect them to be able to. If some guys are saying they can and will accommodate but then won't actually do.. that's on the guys, not on the OP."
It's not a right for them to have.
The other guy changed their mind, for whatever reason. Maybe they were lying about their ability to accommodate? Maybe they are cheating? Maybe they are fantasists? Maybe for whatever reason they got cold feet? Maybe they changed their mind?
If it was a guy complaining about women doing this, we'd get all the arguments about safety, comfort, etc (and they wouldn't be wrong) but if it's a guy... clearly he's a cheater. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"But if people are saying they can.. they're well within their rights to expect them to be able to. If some guys are saying they can and will accommodate but then won't actually do.. that's on the guys, not on the OP.
It's not a right for them to have.
The other guy changed their mind, for whatever reason. Maybe they were lying about their ability to accommodate? Maybe they are cheating? Maybe they are fantasists? Maybe for whatever reason they got cold feet? Maybe they changed their mind?
If it was a guy complaining about women doing this, we'd get all the arguments about safety, comfort, etc (and they wouldn't be wrong) but if it's a guy... clearly he's a cheater."
It's the usual story, one rule for women a different one for men. Not fair at all. I've been approached by cheating women and couples cheating on each other, they are no different in my eyes. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"But if people are saying they can.. they're well within their rights to expect them to be able to. If some guys are saying they can and will accommodate but then won't actually do.. that's on the guys, not on the OP.
It's not a right for them to have.
The other guy changed their mind, for whatever reason. Maybe they were lying about their ability to accommodate? Maybe they are cheating? Maybe they are fantasists? Maybe for whatever reason they got cold feet? Maybe they changed their mind?
If it was a guy complaining about women doing this, we'd get all the arguments about safety, comfort, etc (and they wouldn't be wrong) but if it's a guy... clearly he's a cheater."
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"Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over."
Set off driving you can stay the night at ours xxx |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"Can't believe that we have been talking to 4 guys whose profile show they can accommadate then when when the time of reckoning come, they come up with a crap excuse they can't!
Wonder why guys get such a bad review.
Couples are the way forward i say as well more honest.
Well rant over."
Yeap you should stick to Couples coz they never mess you about or generalise do they. |
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"We are always suspicious of men who can't accommodate its especially important if they from our home town can't be done with angry wives or girlfriends at the door "
I can't accommodate and I'm honest about that.
I live with my kids and it's nearly impossible to get them all to sleep overs at the same time.
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"It is the easiest way to out the cheaters.
So the only valid reason for a single man not to be able to accommodate is because they are a cheater? But a single woman clearly has other valid reasons that no single male could possibly have?
Research your potential meets... "
Why are you putting words in my mouth. I never said the only reason for a man not to accommodate is to be cheating. |
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"
It's the usual story, one rule for women a different one for men. Not fair at all. I've been approached by cheating women and couples cheating on each other, they are no different in my eyes. "
But it IS different for women. And who said life was fair?
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"But if people are saying they can.. they're well within their rights to expect them to be able to. If some guys are saying they can and will accommodate but then won't actually do.. that's on the guys, not on the OP.
It's not a right for them to have.
The other guy changed their mind, for whatever reason. Maybe they were lying about their ability to accommodate? Maybe they are cheating? Maybe they are fantasists? Maybe for whatever reason they got cold feet? Maybe they changed their mind?
If it was a guy complaining about women doing this, we'd get all the arguments about safety, comfort, etc (and they wouldn't be wrong) but if it's a guy... clearly he's a cheater."
My point is irrelevant to cheating.
My point is if person A is telling person B and C they can accommodate. The meet is planned. All is good.
Then A either ghosts, or says they can't accommodate or never could.. they have a right to be frustrated.
Whatever the person's reasons. It could be genuine, it could be bullshit. That is irrelevant to the fact the other side of the arranged meet can be annoyed they had their time wasted by someone. |
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"But if people are saying they can.. they're well within their rights to expect them to be able to. If some guys are saying they can and will accommodate but then won't actually do.. that's on the guys, not on the OP.
It's not a right for them to have.
The other guy changed their mind, for whatever reason. Maybe they were lying about their ability to accommodate? Maybe they are cheating? Maybe they are fantasists? Maybe for whatever reason they got cold feet? Maybe they changed their mind?
If it was a guy complaining about women doing this, we'd get all the arguments about safety, comfort, etc (and they wouldn't be wrong) but if it's a guy... clearly he's a cheater.
My point is irrelevant to cheating.
My point is if person A is telling person B and C they can accommodate. The meet is planned. All is good.
Then A either ghosts, or says they can't accommodate or never could.. they have a right to be frustrated.
Whatever the person's reasons. It could be genuine, it could be bullshit. That is irrelevant to the fact the other side of the arranged meet can be annoyed they had their time wasted by someone."
I also don't give a fuck if the person what ghosts and timewastes is male, female or a couple..
The other side of that meet can be annoyed if they feel they've been messed around and had their time wasted.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very interesting, reading this thread. I personally live with family members, so I am unable to accommodate at any time. It’s a good idea to stick with verified users, but I think i’m slowly coming to the conclusion that without being able to accommodate, i’m probably not going to get verified by anyone either. I just think it’s wrong to assume that someone who cannot accommodate has something to hide |
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"Very interesting, reading this thread. I personally live with family members, so I am unable to accommodate at any time. It’s a good idea to stick with verified users, but I think i’m slowly coming to the conclusion that without being able to accommodate, i’m probably not going to get verified by anyone either. I just think it’s wrong to assume that someone who cannot accommodate has something to hide"
But you can be verified on cam and plenty of people are (safely and legally) doing so during Covid. Perhaps you could share the love by verifying other newbies once you’ve a verification? Mrs SW |
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"We can accommodate but choose not to. Anyone got a judgment to make on that? ?? "
your profile actually says you don't accommodate though the post was about people saying they can but never actually being able to
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can accomodate but only after a few meets , also have 2 teenage lads live with me so has to be planned around them not being here hence due to being a nightshift worker accommodating during the day is easier |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hence we cant accommodate but can travel. Hotel rooms equals neutral ground with the right planning  "
And as a side note, if we do the inviting we pay for the room |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't understand why it's an issue when the guy offers to get a hotel instead.
I don't accommodate, it's there on my profile as I usually don't want people in my space. Ironically, even if they accommodate I'd still prefer a hotel |
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