FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Things that bug you
Things that bug you
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So we were wondering what bugs you most about fab?
Ours are face pics where people are wearing sunglasses and profiles with no pics or meet verifications asking for face pics in a first message.
What are yours? |
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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago
Catthorpe |
"“I’d love to fuck your wife for you”.
Seems as I (female) always deal with all the messages it really irritates me lol!"
Happens the other way round for us. "Hey babes, wanna fuck?", "Hey babes, wuup2", "You're up early babes, whatchya wearing?". It's only ever me (him) online, lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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More than anything?
Having a good conversation with someone, allbeit clean or otherwise, then they are online and go dark...
No warning. 
People are strange.. |
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"Views by couples or women.with no interest in meeting men.
Why waste my time and yours?"
Because that's often not the case: that "not looking for single men" message appears when you block messages from single men. It doesn't necessarily mean they're not interested in men, they just don't want to deal with the deluge of messages that can otherwise occur. |
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Constant pics and vids of cocks and gaping pussies.
The fact that the above seems very popular.
Arrogant profiles.
Having a conversation then nothing ever again midway through.
‘Must be 15”, gym fit, black”
Couples who clearly aren’t a couple.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Straight guys who aren’t looking for tv/ts messageing looking for fun honestly if you can’t be truthful on ur profile how do they expect me to trust them in the sack xxx |
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People who don’t read profiles before messaging.
People who don’t read the full message thread before responding and just repeat things said by others or ask questions which have already been answered.
Lou x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Views by couples or women.with no interest in meeting men.
Why waste my time and yours?"
How on gods green earth is people viewing your profile wasting your time in any way whatsoever?????
I’m dyslexic but get by with a bit of care and attention but for some reason bad grammar and spelling grates my gears which is strange as I’m crap at it myself.
T |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Straight guys who aren’t looking for tv/ts messageing looking for fun honestly if you can’t be truthful on ur profile how do they expect me to trust them in the sack xxx"
Amen to this one.
T |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Muppets whose opening message is, "Hi".
What response do they expect? (it's probably not the one they get though)"
Yes we agree, that doesn't give anyone anything to work with |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Views by couples or women.with no interest in meeting men.
Why waste my time and yours?
Because that's often not the case: that "not looking for single men" message appears when you block messages from single men. It doesn't necessarily mean they're not interested in men, they just don't want to deal with the deluge of messages that can otherwise occur."
Very true |
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1. People who don't read your profile and message regardless if they meet your criteria.
2. Pics of men having sex with their socks on.
3. Pics with toilets in the frame.
4. Pics from "single" men with female beauty products or clothes in the background. |
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Sending messages that never get read even though people are online almost everytime you are.
Its hard as so many will only chat or meet verified people but to get verified you have to meet.
I dont want to pay for the site but will end up doing so soon but that doesnt make you verified. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The sheer number of men posing as women to get your pictures then deleting their profiles.
The number of women who ask for ‘contributions’ for meets i.e. prostitutes.
Women who aren’t all that attractive having ridiculous standards then seemingly complaining about the lack of men with 12” cocks who look like Ryan Gosling with the bodies of David Gandy.
The thinly-veiled racism.
The clique in the forums making it inhospitable for others to contribute to discussion. |
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"The sheer number of men posing as women to get your pictures then deleting their profiles.
The number of women who ask for ‘contributions’ for meets i.e. prostitutes.
Women who aren’t all that attractive having ridiculous standards then seemingly complaining about the lack of men with 12” cocks who look like Ryan Gosling with the bodies of David Gandy.
The thinly-veiled racism.
The clique in the forums making it inhospitable for others to contribute to discussion."
Theres alot in this post.
Some truth, but also I think some just possibly bad personal experience.
There have been many posts talking about racism, but I've not really encountered or come accross any actual racism on here.
The perceived issue normally tends to be white people getting offended on behalf of black people, for the using terms like BBC.
In my experience, black people know whether they feel offended by something, they don't need white people to tell them.
There's definitely a clique on the forums, but that happens sadly.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First message just saying nothing else but “face pics?” And people moaning in the status and saying they will be deleting this can’t find any decent men, women, genuine etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men with a sense of entitlement and that don't understand the no reply = not interested rule. "
or when you politely say no thank you they start calling you nasty names
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men with a sense of entitlement and that don't understand the no reply = not interested rule. or when you politely say no thank you they start calling you nasty names"
Got called sad and deluded by a guy 3 years outside of my age range and then he blocked me like I'd throw a fit at him.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So we were wondering what bugs you most about fab?
Ours are face pics where people are wearing sunglasses and profiles with no pics or meet verifications asking for face pics in a first message.
What are yours?"
100% people who message you constantly asking for meets, when you finally agree to a night they just...simply vanish!!! Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Profiles that ask for more than “one liner” messages and that we be articulate in our opening salvo.
As an intelligent articulate man I read and absorb the profile content and message accordingly but still receive an instant delete....that really touches a nerve with me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"First message just saying nothing else but “face pics?” And people moaning in the status and saying they will be deleting this can’t find any decent men, women, genuine etc "
We would never ask or send face pics on a first message, that always screams pic collector to us if people require that.
We like to get a feel if couples or ladies are interested before we swap face pics.
We do ask men when we are looking to send a face pic but that's just because of the crazy amount that just send a dick pic in the 1st message, even though every pic on the profile shows it already |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Theres alot in this post.
Some truth, but also I think some just possibly bad personal experience.
There have been many posts talking about racism, but I've not really encountered or come accross any actual racism on here.
The perceived issue normally tends to be white people getting offended on behalf of black people, for the using terms like BBC.
In my experience, black people know whether they feel offended by something, they don't need white people to tell them.
There's definitely a clique on the forums, but that happens sadly. "
The mere fact that you chose to reply only to my opinion speaks volumes though, no?
You have also only spoken about and highlighted the experience of black people when there are other ethnic minority groups on Fab: doesn’t that prove we are overlooked and ignored?
And why should your opinion of what is or is not offensive supersede anyone else’s?
Fab is merely a reflection of wider society but sadly it’s a world in which I personally feel people feel more at ease to air opinions without regard to the effects of their words. |
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"Theres alot in this post.
Some truth, but also I think some just possibly bad personal experience.
There have been many posts talking about racism, but I've not really encountered or come accross any actual racism on here.
The perceived issue normally tends to be white people getting offended on behalf of black people, for the using terms like BBC.
In my experience, black people know whether they feel offended by something, they don't need white people to tell them.
There's definitely a clique on the forums, but that happens sadly.
The mere fact that you chose to reply only to my opinion speaks volumes though, no?
You have also only spoken about and highlighted the experience of black people when there are other ethnic minority groups on Fab: doesn’t that prove we are overlooked and ignored?
And why should your opinion of what is or is not offensive supersede anyone else’s?
Fab is merely a reflection of wider society but sadly it’s a world in which I personally feel people feel more at ease to air opinions without regard to the effects of their words."
What speaks volumes? And what are you trying to imply its speaking about? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What speaks volumes? And what are you trying to imply its speaking about? "
It’s telling that you felt the need to try to downplay racism whether perceived or actual on Fab when you’re seemingly not someone from a minority background.
Are you a person of colour who’s been a victim of racism to deny that truth?
I am implying that you have enforced your views and opinions on the experiences of someone who merely stated how they felt: that itself is a form of privilege but you can’t even see it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The most irritating one is ,people sit on the mesaages for days without replying promptly but can been seen online hours writing status and posting pics and asking for chats. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The most irritating one is ,people sit on the mesaages for days without replying promptly but can been seen online hours writing status and posting pics and asking for chats. "
That is annoying and pretty rude  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Men with a sense of entitlement and that don't understand the no reply = not interested rule. or when you politely say no thank you they start calling you nasty names"
Just need to block them once people don't take no for an answer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men with a sense of entitlement and that don't understand the no reply = not interested rule. or when you politely say no thank you they start calling you nasty names
Got called sad and deluded by a guy 3 years outside of my age range and then he blocked me like I'd throw a fit at him. "
i always get that...or well wouldnt meet you anyway ( too fat,old etc) some men  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men with a sense of entitlement and that don't understand the no reply = not interested rule. or when you politely say no thank you they start calling you nasty names
Got called sad and deluded by a guy 3 years outside of my age range and then he blocked me like I'd throw a fit at him. i always get that...or well wouldnt meet you anyway ( too fat,old etc) some men "
Its a power thing . They had the final say. But in reality they didnt just didnt get to read it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People who are happy to talk while they need information or advice and then ignore you once they are settled in
At the moment particularly people trying to shame others who don't want to meet during covid and accusing them of being fake or time wasters
People who wink but then don't respond to polite follow up emails |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People who obviously haven't read our profile.
People who can't be bothered writing a decent message and just say "hows you" etc
People who have a go at you for not replying when you read their message like 2 minutes ago!
Asking for more pics when they don't have any on their profile!
People who can't take a simple "no thanks" |
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"1. People who don't read your profile and message regardless if they meet your criteria.
2. Pics of men having sex with their socks on.
3. Pics with toilets in the frame.
4. Pics from "single" men with female beauty products or clothes in the background."
This is spot on! Exactly the same for us |
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"What speaks volumes? And what are you trying to imply its speaking about?
It’s telling that you felt the need to try to downplay racism whether perceived or actual on Fab when you’re seemingly not someone from a minority background.
Are you a person of colour who’s been a victim of racism to deny that truth?
I am implying that you have enforced your views and opinions on the experiences of someone who merely stated how they felt: that itself is a form of privilege but you can’t even see it "
I'm not downplaying anything.
Show me some on here and I'll stand by your side and call it out
I have been a minority yes. I was born in a country where I was in the minority and now live in a country where I am now in the majority(in terms of skin colour) so I have been on both sides of the fence.
How about you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are lots gf things to irritate on fab, and most have already been covered by other people here.
For me, its ghosting...
Got chatting, exchanged lots of photos, met for a social, got on great, lots more photos, messages and clearly both sides are interested... the WHAM! Ghosted... no explanations, excuses, apologies, nothing...
While there is a lot of things here that are mildly irritable, the ghosting actually hurt. A lot. Unlike "sorry, I don't think this is for me anymore", which would merely disappoint. |
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Where would you like me to start?
Liars, manipulators and cheats
Those who don't read profiles
Those who do read profiles but think it doesn't apply to them
Those who assume you're online purely looking to get fucked right now. You know the type, 'you MUST be horny and looking for a dicking, why else would you be on?"
Mind games
People who are fucked up in their own way but don't admit it. We're all a little fucked up, the only shame is hiding it.
Faux "loveliness"
Shady behaviour
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"“I’d love to fuck your wife for you”.
Seems as I (female) always deal with all the messages it really irritates me lol!
Happens the other way round for us. "Hey babes, wanna fuck?", "Hey babes, wuup2", "You're up early babes, whatchya wearing?". It's only ever me (him) online, lol."
We get a lot of these to and they bug me. Got absolutely no problem with guys wanting to compliment or firt with my wife on here but this is a couples profile and one that clearly suggests I (Daddy) am the dominant here.
When a guy reads our profile and works out that's hes probably going to be communicating with the male it wins him lots of brownie points.
When a guy trys to talk to Babygirl like it's a singles profile he gets blocked. |
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“Hi”, “want 2 fuck the missus solo”, “hi I know you aren’t gay but can I suck your cock”, “can I have more pics?” messages and the ones with literally no substance to them.
Some days we get an influx of messages and then when people don’t get a reply they get annoyed haha. |
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By *rsPricklePantsWoman
over a year ago
Room 237 at The Overlook Hotel, Suffolk |
Guys with only pictures of their cock in public pictures and complain that its only other guys that fab their pictures
Those that don't read profiles and insist on asking for things you state you don't like |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So we were wondering what bugs you most about fab?
Ours are face pics where people are wearing sunglasses and profiles with no pics or meet verifications asking for face pics in a first message.
What are yours?"
Yes that annoys me too,
I sometimes have a face pic on my public profile, and expect people that message me to have one available. I will always send one back when asked. |
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By *rsPricklePantsWoman
over a year ago
Room 237 at The Overlook Hotel, Suffolk |
Those with no public pictures that ask to see more pictures without even offering to send any themselves, guessing they are the ones known as picture collectors
People who ask questions blatantly answered on my profile |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Views by couples or women.with no interest in meeting men.
Why waste my time and yours?"
How is your time being wasted by someone viewing your profile? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Intolerance towards others; rudeness; some people thinking Fab is just for their benefit; trying to spoil fun for others ... just as you see in life off Fab really! |
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People 'complaining' about hundreds of emails in their status, then bulk deleting.
It's like swimming in the sea and complaining that it's not a bath tub.
Use the filters, and find the men who interest you. |
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"Women and couples who wink you but have “no single men” on their profile.
Absolutely pointless!"
As has been pointed out many times, that message appears because they have blocked messages from single males often to stop the deluge of messages, it doesn't necessarily mean they're not interested in single men. If they wink then that will allow you to message them as it disables the filter for that specific account.
So no, not pointless at all. |
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Those status often say something like ‘I’m leaving this site as it’s full of time wasters’ their profiles generally have terrible or no pictures and scant text to encourage a reply.
Telling people on the internet ‘it’s bad manners’ not to reply to their message. I’m assuming if some random person in the street, came up to them and tried to engage them in conversation, they’d immediately stop and converse with them or maybe they’d choose which one they’d like to speak to as well.
Straight guys who see Tgirls as ‘the next best thing’ to a real woman.
Labelling of others on the forums just because they’re trying something new or start a forum post with a question. So others immediately jump on that person who may just want to understand another’s perspective.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Women and couples who wink you but have “no single men” on their profile.
Absolutely pointless!
As has been pointed out many times, that message appears because they have blocked messages from single males often to stop the deluge of messages, it doesn't necessarily mean they're not interested in single men. If they wink then that will allow you to message them as it disables the filter for that specific account.
So no, not pointless at all."
It does not disable the filter, you are still blocked from responding! |
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Those who send a photo with a private message but the same photo is in their public profile anyway. They can rarely send a different photo despite everyone having camera phones. A clear sign of a catfish or fake.
Lou x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Girls who post, “I’m 18 and want to meet older men”. Sets the age range in profile from 50-99, then by the time you’ve composed a reply, they’ve deleted the account again! |
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"Views by couples or women.with no interest in meeting men.
Why waste my time and yours?"
They didn't message you, so didn't waste your time, perhaps just their own. I view quite a few profiles by mistake, often from the forum, where I'm not paying enough attention to where I shove my fingers.
On here, I get frustrated by guys who get really uppity when I've not replied as quickly as they expect. |
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"Women and couples who wink you but have “no single men” on their profile.
Absolutely pointless!
As has been pointed out many times, that message appears because they have blocked messages from single males often to stop the deluge of messages, it doesn't necessarily mean they're not interested in single men. If they wink then that will allow you to message them as it disables the filter for that specific account.
So no, not pointless at all.
It does not disable the filter, you are still blocked from responding!"
My apologies, you're correct.
I got that info from word of mouth, so I wonder if that's what's going on - people think that a wink opens the lines of communication when it doesn't. |
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Ah, this is where I got it from, at the bottom of the filters page is this paragraph:
"Filters don't apply and people can message if you've mailed someone before (if you message someone you have filtered, they can reply), you have winked at someone, or you are friends"
So according to that if someone winks at you you should be able to message back. Doesn't mention it in the FAQ though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ah, this is where I got it from, at the bottom of the filters page is this paragraph:
"Filters don't apply and people can message if you've mailed someone before (if you message someone you have filtered, they can reply), you have winked at someone, or you are friends"
So according to that if someone winks at you you should be able to message back. Doesn't mention it in the FAQ though."
Thanks for looking into this. It may say that but in reality you are still blocked. Take care |
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"The thought of being celibate until i die "
I wouldn’t mind that as that's how I feel right now, but
I want to want sex and the coming together of bodies again, I want desire again. It's just gone and I don't know how long for.
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"“I’d love to fuck your wife for you”.
Seems as I (female) always deal with all the messages it really irritates me lol!
Happens the other way round for us. "Hey babes, wanna fuck?", "Hey babes, wuup2", "You're up early babes, whatchya wearing?". It's only ever me (him) online, lol."
We hate these too. They normally get a sarcastic reply back. We also hate the ones that say have read our profile. Then offer us a Dom, wanna cuck us or over 8 inches.
Daily we're blocking guys. Yesterday, a guy said he was local to us for bankhols, wants to meet. I said "No, M is away". Message back from him. " I'll play with you alone". Needless to say he got blocked. 2 reasons, our profile says, I'm a Vixen, and also says I don't play alone. We can't make it any clearer.
The odds are stacked against single men. They don't do themselves any favours. |
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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
" I wish people would just a simple reply saying not my type.."
We tried that once. Guy then asked what our type was. Like he could suddenly change himself or convince us to change our taste. And guys don't have to deal with loads of messages every day. Simply replying to each message takes time - and I'm pretty sure you don't reply to all your commercial emails saying "no thanks, your product isn't my type". |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Couples profiles that only have pictures of the woman, really bugs me"
Yeah that has always made us wonder too, S is far more photogenic and eye catching than I am but we have a few of me as it's a couples profile.
 |
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I thought this would be a great thread to help me avoid being (too) annoying.
Reading it through there are some recurring helpful thoughts (ta) but its also clear you cant please all the people all the time.
Personally I don't like rudeness (apart from the sort we are mostly on here for of course)
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I wish people would just a simple reply saying not my type..
We tried that once. Guy then asked what our type was. Like he could suddenly change himself or convince us to change our taste. And guys don't have to deal with loads of messages every day. Simply replying to each message takes time - and I'm pretty sure you don't reply to all your commercial emails saying "no thanks, your product isn't my type"."
I once had a delightful gent after telling him he wasn't my type, according to him what was my type was me punching about my weight.
Also blokes that send a sarcastic message/any sort of message when you don't reply... Usually 'take that as a no then' |
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"Sending messages that never get read even though people are online almost everytime you are.
Its hard as so many will only chat or meet verified people but to get verified you have to meet.
I dont want to pay for the site but will end up doing so soon but that doesnt make you verified. "
People using fake pictures ...  |
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""Send face pic for reply" ... and you never hear from them again... though that might reflect more on my face than them!"
It's usually, the new, unverified, no-pics profiles who do this, so I never send a face pic unless they are at least site-verified |
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