FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > why do some men spoil a potential meet.
why do some men spoil a potential meet.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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i wonder how many straight ladies this has happened to? You are arranging a meet with a guy that you have been chatting to on fab, and he seems nice. Meet details sorted when,he then asks if you can find another female to join you and him for a threesome, or he can bring a female friend along.i would say that is totally offputting and uncalled for. The meet then doesnt go ahead.he missed out because he wanted to include another woman knowing that the lady he was meeting is straight and will only do one on one with men. |
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By *abonWoman
over a year ago
L’boro/Ashby & Cheltenham |
Because women’s boundaries are guidelines rather than hard lines, in the eyes of some guys. And then, hopefully when you’re invested, they can persuade you to change your mind. Makes me fucking angry to be on the receiving end. Always managed to nip it in the bud but ffs  |
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"i wonder how many straight ladies this has happened to? You are arranging a meet with a guy that you have been chatting to on fab, and he seems nice. Meet details sorted when,he then asks if you can find another female to join you and him for a threesome, or he can bring a female friend along.i would say that is totally offputting and uncalled for. The meet then doesnt go ahead.he missed out because he wanted to include another woman knowing that the lady he was meeting is straight and will only do one on one with men."
Yes this has happened to me more than once and like you they get told where to go and i refuse to arrange another meet. Think they are trying to impress but it leaves me not amused. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Two things come to mind:
They have unrealistic expectations.
Or:
They are fantasists who subconsciously want to sabotage a meet by suggesting something unreasonable so the woman will call it off, therefore it's not their fault if it doesn't go ahead. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i wonder how many straight ladies this has happened to? You are arranging a meet with a guy that you have been chatting to on fab, and he seems nice. Meet details sorted when,he then asks if you can find another female to join you and him for a threesome, or he can bring a female friend along.i would say that is totally offputting and uncalled for. The meet then doesnt go ahead.he missed out because he wanted to include another woman knowing that the lady he was meeting is straight and will only do one on one with men."
Yes dissapointing and annoying when they already know the score... |
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"Two things come to mind:
They have unrealistic expectations.
Or:
They are fantasists who subconsciously want to sabotage a meet by suggesting something unreasonable so the woman will call it off, therefore it's not their fault if it doesn't go ahead. "
This is a really interesting concept, I know I have in the past self sabotaged relationships, it’s taken me a lot of time on the couch to realise this, and the reasons why. But I think you’re right, they finally find somebody to meet with and then create a ridiculous list of demands, needs and wants that nobody is going to agree with and scupper themselves.
To the OP, sorry you’ve gotten messed around, and good luck in your quest.
J |
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"Same goes for women. I've had many potential great meets annoyingly ruined by some women either saying "no not for me" or even just not replying."
Well that’s not really a potential meet is it really, you sending a message isn’t a potential meet, it’s just you sending a message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah that's pretty bad, but I know one woman who had a guy turn up at hers for a meet with his mate in tow  She was so caught off guard, and felt too nervous to say no, so she embarked on a very uncomfortable (non consensual, really) threesome. I'm not saying the same thing would happen to you, but the blessing here is it didn't get to that stage with your guy |
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By *ooey46Man
over a year ago
Sowerby Bridge |
I probably did the same when I first joined as I was either nervous or wasn't sure if I wanted to go ahead with a meet. Now though if I ever do get a meet I play by the fmales or couples rules |
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"Same goes for women. I've had many potential great meets annoyingly ruined by some women either saying "no not for me" or even just not replying."
Same for me... I've had loads of meets spoiled by the woman asking to bring along her gorgeous best matr girlfriend who wants a ffm. Imagine my chagrine. Bloody cheek. |
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The other day a guy messaged me asking if i wanted to meet, had never spoken to him before. Then I got messages from 2 different couples saying he had told them I would meet them with him! I mean wtaf? Am I bait? And how greedy is this guy! I hope it meant he ended up with 0 meets! |
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I always agree the rules before and if the other party tries to change it then it's a no playing from me. I had a couple say to meet for a mfm then on the day said they had invited a couple of more guys around to join us, so I declined the offer. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
Not something we have heard of before, however attwice we have chatted to couples who have suddenly introduced a second male who they want to bring to the meet. In both cases the male in a lot younger (18 & 19) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Happens with the ladies as well...you message a woman who has a SINGLE profile, chat on, agree to meet(sometimes even book the hotel room), then...surprise! She turns up with her boyfriend/FB/husband.
Everyone is here for their own enjoyment and fulfilling THEIR desires, not yours. It's part of the game, and whenever you find someone whose desires end up not matching with yours, just block and move on. Especially for you ladies, there's plenty of potential meets around, just takes a bit more patience to find the right ones.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As above, it does happen with women doing this too. I went to a meet with a woman, and just as we were getting started a guy walked straight in off the street, got his cock out and started playing with her. The shock was that she was surprised and upset when I got up and walked out! |
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"I always agree the rules before and if the other party tries to change it then it's a no playing from me. I had a couple say to meet for a mfm then on the day said they had invited a couple of more guys around to join us, so I declined the offer. "
I was accomodating a couple at my place, and they decided to invite a TV friend of theirs.
She turned up before them, and with no warning to me and my buddy.
In this case, the more the merrier, but it could have gone horribly wrong.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because women’s boundaries are guidelines rather than hard lines, in the eyes of some guys. And then, hopefully when you’re invested, they can persuade you to change your mind. Makes me fucking angry to be on the receiving end. Always managed to nip it in the bud but ffs "
This is exactly true. They like to think they can negotiate. |
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By *scarsexMan
over a year ago
Stevenage |
"As above, it does happen with women doing this too. I went to a meet with a woman, and just as we were getting started a guy walked straight in off the street, got his cock out and started playing with her. The shock was that she was surprised and upset when I got up and walked out! "
Oh, that’s a weird stuff. But it almost happen to me once. A friend of mine and I met a woman. She agreed for both of us to have some fun. She didn’t say anything, only some fun. So there we went, we spoke a bit, had a drink and she said she wanted to do dogging. Luckily enough I brought my car that day for other circumstances and we went to a dogging place. And there we found a guy. It was a regular dogging spot, so no alarms with him. My mate indicated the guy to come and join us. It was dogging, so the more the better.
When we finished, I chatted with her that night. And guess what? The guy was her husband. But their kink was watching the other playing with more people and not participating. And my dickhead mate was so insistent that the husband had to participate 
I wonder why they hide some information. Once you are in position, you don’t care too much who’s around, right?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because women’s boundaries are guidelines rather than hard lines, in the eyes of some guys. And then, hopefully when you’re invested, they can persuade you to change your mind. Makes me fucking angry to be on the receiving end. Always managed to nip it in the bud but ffs "
Seemingly some guys even treat their partner this way, trying to trick/pressure them into this. Read some horrible things on this site since we joined |
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I don’t understand chaps like that it’s quite clear on here what people like just go with the flow and enjoy the sex fun and friendship if you want a threesome read people profiles and chat to the ones who enjoy that side of this site |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry you experienced that. I honestly can't fathom doing anything like that. If I'm meeting with a young lady or a couple, that's my focus. Really speaks to the guy's character. |
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"To be true i never been left down , but that probably because i don't meet single man in private. I met man two but in club before lockdown and one is very good friend of mine "
But reading your words OP , is very disrespectful from his side when you both already had the meet arranged . |
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This is why when Mrs is meeting a guy for the first time it is social only.
The number of times when arranging a Social meet a guys says so if we get on any chance of fun?
When she says no the conversation stops!  |
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