FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Hard being a single guy on here..
Hard being a single guy on here..
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just keep going mate, I’ve had a couple of great meets on here but it is hard to get them. Trouble is on here that a lot of couples want couples and a lot of the single women from my area want paying for there services and no way I’m paying lol. |
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The problem for males is the amount there is. Where ever we are or go we are never more than half a mile away from a single male according to this sites who's near function. And alot of the time there's atleast 6/7 others. Feel for some of the more genuine guys |
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
Try your luck after the pandemic? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just keep going mate, I’ve had a couple of great meets on here but it is hard to get them. Trouble is on here that a lot of couples want couples and a lot of the single women from my area want paying for there services and no way I’m paying lol. "
Paying for their services??? I saw a profile the other day that had a amazon wish list on it  |
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
Get some feedback on the messages you send out. We get some terrible ones which presumably the sender thinks are perfectly OK. Don't fall into that trap. You can post an example on here and we'll give you our thoughts.
Incidentally, hardly anybody ever takes that advice but they should. |
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It’s not hard for a decent single guy ..
So many say it but it’s simply not true ..
It’s about networking and creating connections..
Not just chatting about sex and pushing to meet ..
If you’re finding it difficult, change your approach |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I tend to send my messages inline with their profile wording, just so people know I have took the time to read and that I am not just casting my net wide and far. Don't get me wrong I am speaking to some people who seem nice. I think patience is a must. Some ladies / couples must get bombarded. |
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"It’s not hard for a decent single guy ..
So many say it but it’s simply not true ..
It’s about networking and creating connections..
Not just chatting about sex and pushing to meet ..
If you’re finding it difficult, change your approach "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
I actually do feel quite sorry for some of the new single guys here trying to start out. Unfortunately you do have a history of awful predecessors to overcome and that’s always going to be something that’s against you.
The absolute best advice I can give is to make sure that you have a good range of photos, doesn’t have to be face pics but a nice selection of clothes, semi clothes, naked etc and at least one paragraph that explains what you’re about ( everyone is here for nsa so that’s pointless putting that ).
But most importantly, custom tailor your message to something about the person you’re responding to. Show them that you have read their profile and that there’s something’s specific about them that made you contact them. Not just that they’re beautiful or sexy or that they turned you on, that’s all generic, put in the effort and give them something to reply to.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
I dont think you need to change anything or need pointers. Its a good profile.. |
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It's a point in a long epidemic that's caused people to focus on other important things, such as family and personal health and career, with meeting unknown people prohibited. It's thus a tougher time to be a single man here.
Don't labour side points too much, if you insist on telling others about them. Are you new to swinging or not? If not, you know what it's about and it could add to your life.
People want to know what you are really like, as a person, physically and sexually. If they grasp you accurately, you've given them what they need to know if you may be of interest. They have others under consideration too, so you'll be compared to see who's most wanted.
After months of lockdown, assume that they have others that they have been waiting to meet for a long time. They're in no hurry to get to know others in many instances.
Be honest, clear and stick to what's important. Manage your expectations |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
three words.... you be you!!!
you are your own unique selling point, and who knows you better than you!!!
go away... sit down with a pen and a pad, and think about what you actually want to say.... think with your brain and not your bits! |
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
I wouldn't say no  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not hard for a decent single guy ..
So many say it but it’s simply not true ..
It’s about networking and creating connections..
Not just chatting about sex and pushing to meet ..
If you’re finding it difficult, change your approach "
Agree with this, some just talk. Sex sex sex but I chat with some great people about everything BUT sex lol |
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
There is nothing wrong with your profile or pics .
you look like a lovely silver fox to me .
you are only on as a single guy a short time just be patient and remember there is a pandemic going on so not many are meeting just now .
Shame your so far away  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
Just keep swimming i do agree with you it is tough as a single guy on here but you just gotta be patient thats all |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
welcome
as others have said, only a couple of weeks at probably the worst time during Covid.
keep going and stay true to your standards, treat people as an equal, with respect and dance to your tune.
good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Damn your eyes op I fancy tea and toast now.
Welcome.
Just tip it bollocks and relax and what comes will come and most of all try and enjoy the adventure.
Best of luck op.
T |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
All looks good to me, good pics and good write up, all I can see wrong is you need to add a letter E in your last sentence so all good, I suppose it’s just bad timing on your time of joining but I’m sure people will take a shine to you if you message in relation to their profile which you say you are so best of luck |
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"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
Don’t give up! You have only been on here 2 weeks. Take your time and build some connections. It will happen. You look great x |
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This is my second stint on Fab. Was on here before and had an active profile for about 5 years. It took about 10 months worth of trying before I finally landed my first meet.
Left the 1st time after it all got a bit too much and began to affect my morale and self esteem.
Its difficult to stay positive and motivated with countless rejections.
Take everything with a pinch of salt, don't expect too much, don't take it personally and try and have fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tend to send my messages inline with their profile wording, just so people know I have took the time to read and that I am not just casting my net wide and far. Don't get me wrong I am speaking to some people who seem nice. I think patience is a must. Some ladies / couples must get bombarded. "
Patience is the name of the game!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why worry?
We can easily s out the waste of times on here. If your genuine then the other genuine members will know. Always read full profiles and never message anyone after just looking at their sexy photos.
Better still get to a club when the pandemic is done, meet and chat with people there, it doesn't mean you'll 100% pull, but you can get others there including the venue staff to verify you.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This place is largely throwaway, OP. We'll refrain from getting out the world's smallest violin
Single men have got themselves a reputation, it's up to you to challenge that. Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do feel for the nice single guys on here. Single girls can more or less choose how many guys a week they want to sleep with and it happens. But single guys struggle to get a look in most of the time.
As others have said, ratio is the main problem. And I see many other girls and couples only want to play with other girls, couples, hothusbands, or groups, not singles.
Put good photos up is the main advice. Less bathroom selfies, and good quality images of you in different settings and tasteful stages of dress/undress. One good dick pic of you hard, but tasteful. Use the best pic for your main profile, obviously (not the dick pic!).
Be prepared to send a couple of really good face shots, I'd advise you send them on your first message. Make your first message individual to the girl and prove you bothered to read their profile. Be articulate and pleasant. Save the crude sex talk for later.
Write a good well rounded profile about who you are and what you're looking for. Be honest.
Be patient and non pushy, but be prepared to do the chasing and leg work.
That's about it. I've seen guys with terrible profiles bag a surprising number if girls on here. I'm sure you'll do fine!
Good luck! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
i say to people three things...
Time, Patience, Basic common sense...
so bearing those three things in mind:
a) is waiting 2 weeks in the middle of a pandemic before writing your opening post really show you have given it time!
b) shown that you have patience!
c) really that you are displaying basic common sense!
sometimes i wish that people would do a little bit of research and read up... yes i get that people want to jump in with both feet.. but sometimes it is better to just dip in a toe first....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do feel for the nice single guys on here. Single girls can more or less choose how many guys a week they want to sleep with and it happens. But single guys struggle to get a look in most of the time.
As others have said, ratio is the main problem. And I see many other girls and couples only want to play with other girls, couples, hothusbands, or groups, not singles.
Put good photos up is the main advice. Less bathroom selfies, and good quality images of you in different settings and tasteful stages of dress/undress. One good dick pic of you hard, but tasteful. Use the best pic for your main profile, obviously (not the dick pic!).
Be prepared to send a couple of really good face shots, I'd advise you send them on your first message. Make your first message individual to the girl and prove you bothered to read their profile. Be articulate and pleasant. Save the crude sex talk for later.
Write a good well rounded profile about who you are and what you're looking for. Be honest.
Be patient and non pushy, but be prepared to do the chasing and leg work.
That's about it. I've seen guys with terrible profiles bag a surprising number if girls on here. I'm sure you'll do fine!
Good luck!"
This is great advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do feel for the nice single guys on here. Single girls can more or less choose how many guys a week they want to sleep with and it happens. But single guys struggle to get a look in most of the time.
As others have said, ratio is the main problem. And I see many other girls and couples only want to play with other girls, couples, hothusbands, or groups, not singles.
Put good photos up is the main advice. Less bathroom selfies, and good quality images of you in different settings and tasteful stages of dress/undress. One good dick pic of you hard, but tasteful. Use the best pic for your main profile, obviously (not the dick pic!).
Be prepared to send a couple of really good face shots, I'd advise you send them on your first message. Make your first message individual to the girl and prove you bothered to read their profile. Be articulate and pleasant. Save the crude sex talk for later.
Write a good well rounded profile about who you are and what you're looking for. Be honest.
Be patient and non pushy, but be prepared to do the chasing and leg work.
That's about it. I've seen guys with terrible profiles bag a surprising number if girls on here. I'm sure you'll do fine!
Good luck!"
Great advice could not have put it better myself |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
Can I just say 'thank you' for not having dick pics on your profile.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your profile is a pretty good start, better than most. But 2 weeks is no time at all on fab, many are here months before they get anyone even chatting to them...being in the forums will help for sure, people like people who chat..and not just about what they will do to us...”yawn” just be patient and good luck |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you so much for everyone who took to time to contribute to this thread, the people who looked at my profile and also the messages of support. Truly overwhelming indeed. Amazing community. Thank you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you so much for everyone who took to time to contribute to this thread, the people who looked at my profile and also the messages of support. Truly overwhelming indeed. Amazing community. Thank you x"
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By *ndrew CareyMan
over a year ago
Peterborough, Cambridgeshire & Lincolnshire |
"OK, there maybe thousands of us on here and some would say: put something that stands out, on your profile.
I am a well groomed, honest and polite man, so without being too harsh: any pointers? "
Patience and perseverance are key. If people are not interested, don't dwell on it, just move on.
Best of luck. There are good people here, just need to be patient |
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"Thank you so much for everyone who took to time to contribute to this thread, the people who looked at my profile and also the messages of support. Truly overwhelming indeed. Amazing community. Thank you x"
You're welcome & good luck |
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