FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Trying to help you get laid
Trying to help you get laid
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My profile is spot on
"
I did have to take a comfort break half way through reading it but yes it's spot on and can not be improved on....
You also have the most beautiful eyes... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me... "
lol hey how do you get out of your front door   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Purley?
No thanks, I don't want any spelling errors...
"
Autocorect...bloody thing...anyway it's not a CV for job on countdown... I'm just trying to help lonely lads and lasses get the ride..... |
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"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me... "
Will your profile review be to add punctuation like you do it....? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Women don’t need any help and men only need to have pictures and be found attractive by the people they want to meet.
No magic formula, no amount of humour on a profile will get a meet, it’s down to the pictures. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me...
Will your profile review be to add punctuation like you do it....? "
If it works it works you can't argue with success... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Women don’t need any help and men only need to have pictures and be found attractive by the people they want to meet.
No magic formula, no amount of humour on a profile will get a meet, it’s down to the pictures. "
At least your honest...all these ladies who post I'm looking for a great personality and sence of humour....it's all bullshit....it's an 8" cock and hard Abbs that win the day |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh yeah you can review mine "
Ye old witch doc
What a brilliant profile....I bet you have seen some serious action over the years... would love to go on a club night with you as my wing man... we would be up to our nutts in guts... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How about mine cm? "
King G
You are definitely a top baller...I can imagine when you walk into spearmint rhino they order extra sparklers in.
Your honesty and direct approach is what it's all about...
Just a bit of fashion advice...invest in some gucci sliders, get a pair of gold budgie smugglers teamed off with a chinchilla coat and you better put some shit on your stick to beat them off with.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How about mine cm?
King G
You are definitely a top baller...I can imagine when you walk into spearmint rhino they order extra sparklers in.
Your honesty and direct approach is what it's all about...
Just a bit of fashion advice...invest in some gucci sliders, get a pair of gold budgie smugglers teamed off with a chinchilla coat and you better put some shit on your stick to beat them off with.... "
Why the fuck have I never thought of this. CM you're a genius |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am pleased to announce that I have recieved the Clunge Monster seal of approval. I shall wear it with pride!"
Sorry about that...it should come out with a bit of scrubbing. X |
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"Women don’t need any help and men only need to have pictures and be found attractive by the people they want to meet.
No magic formula, no amount of humour on a profile will get a meet, it’s down to the pictures.
At least your honest...all these ladies who post I'm looking for a great personality and sence of humour....it's all bullshit....it's an 8" cock and hard Abbs that win the day"
Damn I fall 2 inches short and the abs are well guarded. But bulking season is over. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’d welcome a critique of my profile please "
Ok keef... it's not bad as it is....but any angry penis pics need to go into friends only..
Take a black and white picture of you looking into a mirror as a profile pic. Have clothes on for that...put some bullshit in about how your caring and respectful...women like that sort of thing. Just remember the odds on here are harsh...150 blokes to 1 woman... Friday at yates/ wheatherspoons will give you 30 to 1 ... or if you really want an advantage join a flower arranging class....make sure to tell everyone your not gay though or you will be going on a lot of shopping dates.. I made that mistake...good luck mate |
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"I’d welcome a critique of my profile please
Ok keef... it's not bad as it is....but any angry penis pics need to go into friends only..
Take a black and white picture of you looking into a mirror as a profile pic. Have clothes on for that...put some bullshit in about how your caring and respectful...women like that sort of thing. Just remember the odds on here are harsh...150 blokes to 1 woman... Friday at yates/ wheatherspoons will give you 30 to 1 ... or if you really want an advantage join a flower arranging class....make sure to tell everyone your not gay though or you will be going on a lot of shopping dates.. I made that mistake...good luck mate "
Thank you CM! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Go on then, help me out. "
Venus Mantrap
Oh my days.... I've just had to have a wipe down after looking at your pictures.... I'm guessing your inbox is bursting at the seams .
Although it doesn't really say what kind of man does it for you...tall, handsome with a sence of humour... well that could be any of 4 or 5 guys on here...
How about a reference to a film star.... and lots more fully naked pictures, I'm happy to sort through them for you.. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great."
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush... |
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush..."
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldnt mind any photo reviews and tips with photos if people would be so kind...
I wouldnt define myself as "sexy" so for me it's pretty hard to take a shot I'm happy with, you know? Haha
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt mind any photo reviews and tips with photos if people would be so kind...
I wouldnt define myself as "sexy" so for me it's pretty hard to take a shot I'm happy with, you know? Haha
Get some black and white shots with your top off but not your cock out ...a couple with a suit on and with your work gear...ditch the existing profile pic...write a bit more what your interested in and kind of women you like...
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt mind any photo reviews and tips with photos if people would be so kind...
I wouldnt define myself as "sexy" so for me it's pretty hard to take a shot I'm happy with, you know? Haha
Get some black and white shots with your top off but not your cock out ...a couple with a suit on and with your work gear...ditch the existing profile pic...write a bit more what your interested in and kind of women you like...
"
Thank you very much! I'll get on it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush...
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me"
Its that catch 22... you gotta break the ice 1st...join in the forums more...it will get you chatting |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't need any help"
Mr Monkey you are one fella who has seriously got the swinging scene down to a tea...
Pictures.. perfect
Cock.. length and Girth perfect
Write up.. everything you need to include in a perfect bio...just perfect
No more to say ....just perfect..  |
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush...
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me
Its that catch 22... you gotta break the ice 1st...join in the forums more...it will get you chatting"
That’s not Catch 22 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush...
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me
Its that catch 22... you gotta break the ice 1st...join in the forums more...it will get you chatting
That’s not Catch 22"
You can't disagree with the advice line... |
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush...
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me
Its that catch 22... you gotta break the ice 1st...join in the forums more...it will get you chatting
That’s not Catch 22
You can't disagree with the advice line... "
I'm trying to get involved in the forums but just get passed over mainly. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is that why you’ve only one veri from 3000 looks?"
3000 looks this week...before was getting like 5 maybe 10 a day...
Going to keep veris on a need to know... ladies will swerve you if you have too many....no one wants a player...you get me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush...
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me
Its that catch 22... you gotta break the ice 1st...join in the forums more...it will get you chatting
That’s not Catch 22
You can't disagree with the advice line...
I'm trying to get involved in the forums but just get passed over mainly."
Keep plugging away it can take months to break through ... |
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"Women don’t need any help and men only need to have pictures and be found attractive by the people they want to meet.
No magic formula, no amount of humour on a profile will get a meet, it’s down to the pictures. "
Oh my! An overnight with you would be a first for me, in so many ways .......  |
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"To be fair I'm just looking to start a conversation and look for chemistry. If sex comes after that then great.
Problem is there are 1,000s of other guys saying exactly the same thing....and I bet most are lying and just looking to dip their wick...so unfortunately you will get tarred with the same brush...
Yes this is an issue. But the only way people will find out is having a conversation with me
Its that catch 22... you gotta break the ice 1st...join in the forums more...it will get you chatting
That’s not Catch 22
You can't disagree with the advice line...
I'm trying to get involved in the forums but just get passed over mainly.
Keep plugging away it can take months to break through ... "
I am persistent |
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"I don't need any help
Mr Monkey you are one fella who has seriously got the swinging scene down to a tea...
Pictures.. perfect
Cock.. length and Girth perfect
Write up.. everything you need to include in a perfect bio...just perfect
No more to say ....just perfect.. "
And 15 meets in 3 months, certainly beats your 2 in 1 month  |
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"Women don’t need any help and men only need to have pictures and be found attractive by the people they want to meet.
No magic formula, no amount of humour on a profile will get a meet, it’s down to the pictures. "
Again, I couldn’t disagree more. Some women may just scan for good photos, others require considerably more. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't need any help
Mr Monkey you are one fella who has seriously got the swinging scene down to a tea...
Pictures.. perfect
Cock.. length and Girth perfect
Write up.. everything you need to include in a perfect bio...just perfect
No more to say ....just perfect..
And 15 meets in 3 months, certainly beats your 2 in 1 month "
You do realise meeting people isn't a competition... well it's not for me.. if I meet just one person that I have a genuine connection with that's great... also I've chosen to hide veris so people don't think I'm a serial shagger... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've chosen to hide veris so people don't think I'm a serial shagger...
But you haven’t hidden your summary. Oops. "
I bet your a bundle of fun at a party... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Please can you do mine OP? Xx"
Well Belleshells ... cracking pictures very tastefully set...
Great writeup and very honest... nothing to improve on...I bet you get a stack of winks/messages |
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"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me... "
3 days ago you wrote:
“OK.. things have gone a bit stale for me on here and am opening up my mind to new ideas..
I gave my profile a spruce up today in the hope my inbox would light up...but alas it hasn't
Please review me and any criticism, thoughts, ideas or advice would be very welcome”
All those looks you got were from people looking at your profile because of the above post. And suddenly you’re a profile guru? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me...
3 days ago you wrote:
“OK.. things have gone a bit stale for me on here and am opening up my mind to new ideas..
I gave my profile a spruce up today in the hope my inbox would light up...but alas it hasn't
Please review me and any criticism, thoughts, ideas or advice would be very welcome”
All those looks you got were from people looking at your profile because of the above post. And suddenly you’re a profile guru? "
To be fair to the OP I think it was meant to be taken light heartedly. It seems to have run off with itself a bit ... strange that for a forum thread! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me...
3 days ago you wrote:
“OK.. things have gone a bit stale for me on here and am opening up my mind to new ideas..
I gave my profile a spruce up today in the hope my inbox would light up...but alas it hasn't
Please review me and any criticism, thoughts, ideas or advice would be very welcome”
All those looks you got were from people looking at your profile because of the above post. And suddenly you’re a profile guru? "
Brother welcome to the world of marketing...one minute your the cock of the walk...the next your a feather duster |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me...
3 days ago you wrote:
“OK.. things have gone a bit stale for me on here and am opening up my mind to new ideas..
I gave my profile a spruce up today in the hope my inbox would light up...but alas it hasn't
Please review me and any criticism, thoughts, ideas or advice would be very welcome”
All those looks you got were from people looking at your profile because of the above post. And suddenly you’re a profile guru?
To be fair to the OP I think it was meant to be taken light heartedly. It seems to have run off with itself a bit ... strange that for a forum thread!"
Jennie save me please..x |
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"Women don’t need any help and men only need to have pictures and be found attractive by the people they want to meet.
No magic formula, no amount of humour on a profile will get a meet, it’s down to the pictures. "
This. I have a terrible resting bitch face in photos, I try to smile more but it just looks worse. Until I manage to solve this problem I doubt I'll get laid at all. The profile is what it is. Some love it, some think it's stupid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me...
3 days ago you wrote:
“OK.. things have gone a bit stale for me on here and am opening up my mind to new ideas..
I gave my profile a spruce up today in the hope my inbox would light up...but alas it hasn't
Please review me and any criticism, thoughts, ideas or advice would be very welcome”
All those looks you got were from people looking at your profile because of the above post. And suddenly you’re a profile guru?
To be fair to the OP I think it was meant to be taken light heartedly. It seems to have run off with itself a bit ... strange that for a forum thread!
Jennie save me please..x"
I did try x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You've not demonstrated your full abilities yet op - no open profile pics. Nor thousands of veris, detailing explicitly why the rest of the site shouldn't have you "
Veris are going to be on a need to know...waiting to book a professional photographer and the travel size lynx can and miniature sky remote not here yet either. |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me... "
As much as I would like to take profile advice from a shadow profile pic called Clunge monster with only 2 meets one with a man claiming to try and help me get laid, I would rather take a call from BT TECHNICAL department.
so I'll pass thanks. |
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"You've not demonstrated your full abilities yet op - no open profile pics. Nor thousands of veris, detailing explicitly why the rest of the site shouldn't have you
Veris are going to be on a need to know...waiting to book a professional photographer and the travel size lynx can and miniature sky remote not here yet either."
I’m looking forward to the ‘classy’ pics of clunge leaking cum |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh yeah you can review mine
Ye old witch doc
What a brilliant profile....I bet you have seen some serious action over the years... would love to go on a club night with you as my wing man... we would be up to our nutts in guts... "
thought you may appreciate it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me... "
Pmsl |
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"In an effort to make friends on FAB....I'm offering a profile review service.....
This service will be free and Purley out the goodness of my heart....
After rewriting my own profile the views went from about 5 or 6 a day to nearly 3000 last week....so I think I've got things right...
Don't be shy and inbox me... "
Funniest profile ever  F |
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