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Bi Male, or Not..?
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Hi people,
I've been on here for five yrs now and I've met some really nice people and I've been lucky enough to have enjoyed some fantastic times but since coming out as being bisexual (changing my sexuality on profile) the interaction with women and couples has dropped big time. I'm totally straight acting, a manly man, I'm a normal chilled out guy. I work hard and I'd help anyone, I send people decent messages (I think) not just silly one liners, I have photo's of myself on my profile but I just don't know what I'm doing wrong!? |
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"Hi people,
I've been on here for five yrs now and I've met some really nice people and I've been lucky enough to have enjoyed some fantastic times but since coming out as being bisexual (changing my sexuality on profile) the interaction with women and couples has dropped big time. I'm totally straight acting, a manly man, I'm a normal chilled out guy. I work hard and I'd help anyone, I send people decent messages (I think) not just silly one liners, I have photo's of myself on my profile but I just don't know what I'm doing wrong!? "
Make another bi profile, and change back to straight. |
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There is still some reluctance on this one. Definitely a lot of people just block or drop. Which is amusing when some aren't sure if they are fab straight or Bi.
For me it's about honesty, I love women and group play, meeting guys solo doesn't do anything for me but in a mixed group I am happy to enjoy everything.
I also find the M/F bi divide strange when bi F refuse to accept bi men. I can understand being risk averse but times have moved on since the 1980s. |
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It's strange. People are totally fine with the female being bi, but as soon as the male comes out as enjoying fuller play then people get weird. Nothing wrong with allowing more scenarios, perhaps they feel threatened |
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Couldn't tell you the last straight male couple that were interested in us past a "Hey how are you message". Get plenty of interest off straight single guys though! We also thought about two profiles but decided we're better off just going to clubs and keeping things simple and honest on here x |
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I think over the year and a half we've been on here though that meets have become harder to come by. Perhaps your change of sexuality on your profile has coincided with a general downturn on here? Plenty of people seem to moan about it being worse on here than ever, we haven't been here long enough to really be the judge though. |
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No idea but The comment to make a separate profile, this would be a huge no for us. Honesty is huge for us. Being bi makes no difference as long as the guy keeps his hands off of beast.
Same as any other rule really, just respect and honesty. |
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"That's what I've been thinking guys, maybe so. You are right also about many others moaning, I hear that a lot. Thanks guys x"
It's our pleasure Xx popped you on our hotlist too... You're only up the road |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some of us just aren't into bi men, it's nothing that you're doing wrong, people just know what they do and don't want.
But there are plenty of women and couples that do like bi guys so just focus your attention there. |
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Fab is a funny old place. You can be seen as weird if you're a straight female and somehow dirty if you're a bi man.
I'd look at the lack of replies / interest as an unintended filter to out the homophobic.
I'm (Rob) on Fabguys as well as here. It's amazing how many single guys are straight on here and bi on Fabguys! There are also guys on here with a straight and a bi profile, which they seem to log into one after the other. That rings major alarm bells with us.
OP, just embrace who you are and ignore those who don't accept you. Also, club nights might be best for you. People are people in clubs, not a long list of categories |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is something amiss.
I have seen many forums where women say they love bi men.
Yet there is not a single week goes by that I am not contacted by a straight man looking to hook up.
Yet again I see forum posts from hot couples saying they struggle to meet bi men.
I am so confused I am not even sure what point I am trying to make here. Lol
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"We prefer bi guys. More possibilities hubby is only orally bi but still more possibilities "
We only play with bi guys. (Well, unless we're after something in particular.)
Nothing beats a bi meet in our experience. So much you can do! |
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@LolaDaisy
I'm certainly not saying everyone should like bi men Lola, I know it's each to their own. I only contact people who are looking for men and if it's a couples profile I'll only message if I see the guy is bisexual. Thank you x
That bum looks sore!? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Couldn't tell you the last straight male couple that were interested in us past a "Hey how are you message". Get plenty of interest off straight single guys though! We also thought about two profiles but decided we're better off just going to clubs and keeping things simple and honest on here x"
This
Just because it says bi on our profile doesn’t mean that mr is gonna try and jump on another males cock every 2 seconds ! (Although if asked nicely he would
And the amount of straight guys that will send the same message day after day is ridiculous. At clubs at least you get to express yourself properly , explain that you’re bi but that doesn’t mean that it’s a must for us to play and so on . At least us with bi on our profiles are not scared to show our sexuality, we should be proud of being greedy haha |
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"No idea but The comment to make a separate profile, this would be a huge no for us. Honesty is huge for us. Being bi makes no difference as long as the guy keeps his hands off of beast.
Same as any other rule really, just respect and honesty. "
God no, I'd never make a move on the guy if he wasn't bi, I'm tactile and very considerate around straight hubbies.
Thanks guys, nice profile! x |
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"That's what I've been thinking guys, maybe so. You are right also about many others moaning, I hear that a lot. Thanks guys x
It's our pleasure Xx popped you on our hotlist too... You're only up the road"
Hi Ric and Danni, Where have you two been hiding?? I like your profile guys and those photo's look very sexy! I love the drive from Hull to York x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You’ve done nothing wrong by being honest OP.
Hate it when couples message and the male is listed as straight but they tell us he’s actually Bi and loves to play with TV’s.
We’re no ones guilty secret.
Miss V |
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"You’ve done nothing wrong by being honest OP.
Hate it when couples message and the male is listed as straight but they tell us he’s actually Bi and loves to play with TV’s.
We’re no ones guilty secret.
Miss V"
Me too Miss V! Thank you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You’ve done nothing wrong by being honest OP.
Hate it when couples message and the male is listed as straight but they tell us he’s actually Bi and loves to play with TV’s.
We’re no ones guilty secret.
Miss V
Me too Miss V! Thank you x"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do see a lot of profiles which state ‘no bi men’, or write a whole paragraph about what they believe a person’s profile and/or verifications mean about someone’s sexuality.
Honestly those people care a whole lot more than me, and so we aren’t going to meet; that’s fine. Surely it’s better to get fewer messages that are higher quality?
It cuts both ways, too. Some women/couples actively seek bi guys. I was at a club a few weeks ago, in the jacuzzi with two other single guys and a woman I won’t name came to chat to us- all was fine and conversation was flowing, until she asked if any of us were bi. They laughed and said no, I said yes. She clarified somewhat wide eyed and I confirmed that yes, I was. Conversation dead and eye contact avoided from the fellas I had been chatting to without issue; and a couple of minutes later, off I went with her.
It comes down to not caring what others think, to a degree I suspect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"@LolaDaisy
I'm certainly not saying everyone should like bi men Lola, I know it's each to their own. I only contact people who are looking for men and if it's a couples profile I'll only message if I see the guy is bisexual. Thank you x
That bum looks sore!? "
It was, in the best possible way |
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For me, being part of the Fab/Swing community allows me to explore areas of my sexuality.
I'm far from fully bi and know that many other guys are similar to me in that regard, so its great to be able to connect and chat with people who have the same desires.
I do understand that bi and bi-curious guys will not be everyones preference, so it's better to be clear about what you are looking for IMHO. As an example, i know that cross-dressing is an area that many guys explore, but it does nothing for me, so better that I make that clear than waste peoples time.
I suppose it all depends what your primary goals are - is it to meet people who also enjoy your specific 'thing' or to generally meet st8 and bi people. The way you write your profile will include or exclude you depending on who is reading it! You cant really have it both ways - in that regard at least |
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"We only play with bi guys. (Well, unless we're after something in particular.)
Nothing beats a bi meet in our experience. So much you can do! "
Couldn't agree more. So much fun. Shame more don't share this view. |
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"Hi people,
I've been on here for five yrs now and I've met some really nice people and I've been lucky enough to have enjoyed some fantastic times but since coming out as being bisexual (changing my sexuality on profile) the interaction with women and couples has dropped big time. I'm totally straight acting, a manly man, I'm a normal chilled out guy. I work hard and I'd help anyone, I send people decent messages (I think) not just silly one liners, I have photo's of myself on my profile but I just don't know what I'm doing wrong!? "
I found the same thing when I discovered my bi side after being on here for 3 years and the way I look I'd be the last person you'd expect to be bi. You just have to tailor your messages to the people who will fit your new dynamic and are seeking bi men. I find going to bi nights at clubs better tbh as you are meeting people face to face and less likely to meet time wasters. My Fab life is so much busier this way as it filters out the usual Fab fantasists and dreamers. I know a lot of straight couples who struggle to get meets off here for the same reason. Be true to yourself though if you are bi/curious on your profile as putting straight isn't really fair to those who don't want to meet bi men. Most importantly don't worry about those who don't want to meet you and find those that do |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
It is frustrating for sure. I put bi on mine as I don’t mind the bi play if they are both in to it. Myself I wouldn’t seek out a guy on his own unless there is a attraction with is very slim as I am not in to guys.
But the chances of meeting anyone on here is very slim anyway. |
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"It is frustrating for sure. I put bi on mine as I don’t mind the bi play if they are both in to it. Myself I wouldn’t seek out a guy on his own unless there is a attraction with is very slim as I am not in to guys.
But the chances of meeting anyone on here is very slim anyway. " I’m must be skinny as a rake then |
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By *oo hotCouple
over a year ago
North West |
We are a kinky couple and we like kinky guys. The issue for us is that we like guys to be guys and not some effeminate fetishist who likes to dress in women’s underwear and be submissive.
Crossing swords and being comfortable about it is what is important to us. Unfortunately many bi/bi curious guys send out the wrong message (at least from our point of view anyway).
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me, being part of the Fab/Swing community allows me to explore areas of my sexuality.
I'm far from fully bi and know that many other guys are similar to me in that regard, so its great to be able to connect and chat with people who have the same desires.
I do understand that bi and bi-curious guys will not be everyones preference, so it's better to be clear about what you are looking for IMHO. As an example, i know that cross-dressing is an area that many guys explore, but it does nothing for me, so better that I make that clear than waste peoples time.
I suppose it all depends what your primary goals are - is it to meet people who also enjoy your specific 'thing' or to generally meet st8 and bi people. The way you write your profile will include or exclude you depending on who is reading it! You cant really have it both ways - in that regard at least "
Clarifying the extent of bisexuality can be difficult, I know for a lot of men it can only happen with a woman present. It might also be "all about the cock" so there's not going to be any kissing or running of hands etc. Might be oral only, so many other caveats. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its not just on here women run at the sight of a bisexual man. All dating apps. I personally love the irony of "no homopbes" who then instantly block when you respond to a question and tell them that your bi.
In my area the bi couples that show up on my feed (local) are all wanting bi men with rather large dicks, 9 inch plus. Im begining to question is fab a place for average looking, average length, single bi guys like myself. |
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"That's what I've been thinking guys, maybe so. You are right also about many others moaning, I hear that a lot. Thanks guys x
It's our pleasure Xx popped you on our hotlist too... You're only up the road
Hi Ric and Danni, Where have you two been hiding?? I like your profile guys and those photo's look very sexy! x"
They certainly are....we met them at a club recently! |
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"That's what I've been thinking guys, maybe so. You are right also about many others moaning, I hear that a lot. Thanks guys x
It's our pleasure Xx popped you on our hotlist too... You're only up the road
Hi Ric and Danni, Where have you two been hiding?? I like your profile guys and those photo's look very sexy! x
They certainly are....we met them at a club recently!"
Jaydees? |
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I think there's some utility in someone saying on their profile that they're not into bi men. Let's me know up front who to avoid. Only thing you can do if it bothers you is to remember it's not your problem but their hang ups. |
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"I think there's some utility in someone saying on their profile that they're not into bi men. Let's me know up front who to avoid. Only thing you can do if it bothers you is to remember it's not your problem but their hang ups. "
Been a while since I had a perv at your profile... forgot how sexy you were Ric xXx |
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"I think there's some utility in someone saying on their profile that they're not into bi men. Let's me know up front who to avoid. Only thing you can do if it bothers you is to remember it's not your problem but their hang ups.
Been a while since I had a perv at your profile... forgot how sexy you were Ric xXx "
You two are very sexy.. |
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"I think there's some utility in someone saying on their profile that they're not into bi men. Let's me know up front who to avoid. Only thing you can do if it bothers you is to remember it's not your problem but their hang ups.
Been a while since I had a perv at your profile... forgot how sexy you were Ric xXx "
By all means perv away I've certainly been returning the favour |
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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"It's a no no for us, bi females yes, bi males no.
But why? That's really the point here, not just stating your position.. "
I don't get it either. I don't really class myself as bi, but I'm certainly bi-curious because of the moment takes me and it happens, it happens. I do t generally find men attractive, though I do find a beautiful trans girl or convincing CD a fascinating fantasy, hence I don't put straight.
So long as people respect bounderies, why does it matter? I mean, personally, if someone fancies me of either sex or any gender I'm flattered. Doesn't mean I'll reciprocate.
C. |
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Personally, I wouldn’t want to be meeting bi-phobic people, so knowing upfront about it is better for me.
But I have noted that sometimes the very people who are ‘no bi males’ have veris from guys who fuck around with other guys. They just put Straight on their profiles.
Unlike them, I don’t lie about my bi-sexuality to get further with people who don’t care for bi guys, but there’s quite a few people on here who have met up with Guys who love the cock and are in total ignorance about it. |
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"Personally, I wouldn’t want to be meeting bi-phobic people, so knowing upfront about it is better for me.
But I have noted that sometimes the very people who are ‘no bi males’ have veris from guys who fuck around with other guys. They just put Straight on their profiles.
Unlike them, I don’t lie about my bi-sexuality to get further with people who don’t care for bi guys, but there’s quite a few people on here who have met up with Guys who love the cock and are in total ignorance about it. "
Noted that as well. It can be a little rough being openly bi here so I find it a tad annoying to be approached by someone with "straight" on their profile. |
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"
Noted that as well. It can be a little rough being openly bi here so I find it a tad annoying to be approached by someone with "straight" on their profile."
I've been telling guys who tell us they're bi that it doesn't count if their profile doesn't say so.
Tbh this thread has put me in two minds about that... And for my own status. I think generally if my status rules us out them they're probably people I'd dislike anyway. But FOMO is always tough for me to get past. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
The thing is a lot is made of people who state "no bi guys" and those guys who choose to label as "straight" - what most seem to miss is that those that won't meet bi guys are in the minority on here, at least that's been my experience - the vast majority of people are either not bothered in the slightest or actively seek bi guys - it's just that those that advertise they won't meet us stand out more because they state it, so perception ends up differing from reality.
It's another one of those situations where I prefer not to concern myself with those that won't meet me, and focus on those that potentially will.
Likewise with those that won't meet bi guys, it's their preference and so long as they are not openly expressing that preference in a homophobic or bigoted way I'm not going to question why they have it, any more than I'd question why someone won't meet people of a certain age, or any other of the myriad preferences people have. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can you tell if a guy is bi or straight the answer is NO.
Would you know if a guy as been with other men NO
As a woman do you enjoy sucking cock
As a woman do you enjoy licking pussy
As a man do you enjoy licking pussy
As a man do you enjoy sucking cock
Its great to share what you enjoy we all enjoy as bi
If i put straight on my profile you would treat me as a man but what has changed to share your pleasure your getting and receiving enjoy it together.
Ok you dont like two blokes sucking cock
But im still a man treat me as a man a straight man, if your straight if we swapped partners im still a man enjoying you and your female body if your a bi woman i have no problem with you been bi,then again some women dont like bi woman.
So what is the difference what are people scared of if you thought they are straight find out there not.
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I’m bisexual, have been on Fab for 5+ years and occasionally play with guys but more generally with Bi / straight couples.
What I tend to do is visit clubs on their bi nights and again on the single guy night. I sometimes bring along the lady in my profile picture, who is also bisexual.
When I’m a coupling we tend to find guys will change their story and suddenly say they’ve been to a bi night before but didn’t play as the willies looked too big. One recently told me he was 5% bisexual. Don’t know how he realised which bit of him was bi -D
Be honest with yourself and have fun. |
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"
I've been telling guys who tell us they're bi that it doesn't count if their profile doesn't say so.
Tbh this thread has put me in two minds about that... And for my own status. I think generally if my status rules us out them they're probably people I'd dislike anyway. But FOMO is always tough for me to get past. "
It's not just the FOMO, it's that minor sting of reject from people that have a negative preconception of you based on something that seems irrelevant |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Problem is it isnt just on here, its everywhere. Male bisexuality is almost a taboo in a lot of corners of society, where as homosexuality is accepted in a lot of these parts of society. Biphobia is real.
Even on grindr, there is this perception that bisexual men are either just experimenting or guys who are gay but still in the closet.
Try being cyber bullied by the guy who ran my university's lgbt society, because acording to him bisexuality doesn't exsist. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That's what I've been thinking guys, maybe so. You are right also about many others moaning, I hear that a lot. Thanks guys x
It's our pleasure Xx popped you on our hotlist too... You're only up the road"
Wish I was up the road |
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"That's what I've been thinking guys, maybe so. You are right also about many others moaning, I hear that a lot. Thanks guys x
It's our pleasure Xx popped you on our hotlist too... You're only up the road
Hi Ric and Danni, Where have you two been hiding?? I like your profile guys and those photo's look very sexy! x
They certainly are....we met them at a club recently!
Jaydees? "
Yup x
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"We just love meeting other bi guys for sex so much more to do" Your sexuality is your own business you're not in a boy band that you have to tell everybody what your interested in , Am straight guy but I don't have problems being around bi guys , But would only be playing with the ladies in the room
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