FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Advice and help??

Advice and help??

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

So a question to the ladies and please don't take this as need and please constructive comments only please.

So a few years ago I was online as a couple with my wife and as many women say we got 100s of messages daily but now as a single guy I'd like to know what can I do to make my profile more appealing and start up conversations.

I'm an easy going polite guy yer I've got a hairy dad bod not fir everyone bu would love some golden nuggets of advice from ladies on how to be a better more appealing single guy.

Please dont be to harsh lol

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By *sm265Woman over a year ago

Shangri-la

I've sent you a message

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The thing is you've asked us not to be too harsh but it's stopping me expressing my opinion because I don't want to hurt your feelings.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you considered waxing?

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By *sm265Woman over a year ago

Shangri-la

I've messaged you some thoughts, also worth having a look at a few of the more active male forumites profiles for ideas on pics etc.

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By *izzy69Man over a year ago

London

I THINK what many women would say is, don't put any old shit on your profile and especially the pics.

Don't do it for the sake of doing it but do it because you really think it's appealing and/or looks good.

That too is subjective (my own have been both critiqued and appreciated so take opinions with a pinch) but at least you've made a considered effort rather than just throwing things out there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"The thing is you've asked us not to be too harsh but it's stopping me expressing my opinion because I don't want to hurt your feelings. "

If you have a thought please ker me know pm me if its harsh and feel free to block me once you have so I cant reply but an honest answer is better than a cryptic one

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Have you considered waxing? "

I have but I also think why should I wax my body I'd rather meet someone that doesn't mind hair than wax my chestfro to get more fabs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The profile name suggests your hanging on to the ex could be seen as a turn off if you use it to label yourself by all means explain that to people but using it as a name tho im not sure is a good idea if trying to attract someone

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Have you considered waxing?

I have but I also think why should I wax my body I'd rather meet someone that doesn't mind hair than wax my chestfro to get more fabs"

I was, of course, joking

Don't change yourself to please others.

But keep in mind, and I'm sure you know this already as it's not your first rodeo, not every woman will be attracted to you, but there are some that will be, it will take time, but in that time, attend socials, chat in the forums, and always be yourself.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The thing is you've asked us not to be too harsh but it's stopping me expressing my opinion because I don't want to hurt your feelings.

If you have a thought please ker me know pm me if its harsh and feel free to block me once you have so I cant reply but an honest answer is better than a cryptic one"

OK your profile name would put me off, as would the start of your profile.

It's a bit too personal on a site where most people are looking to make easy going connections.

I'm not saying you shouldn't tell people your story, we all have them but it's probably better to do so after you get chatting.

As it stands I'd worry about your emotional needs and if things would get too heavy too soon.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Hairy isn't a problem.

I would say that you present yourself as a widower and father first which is admirable in general but you might consider how appealing it is to f you're looking for nsa sex.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"The thing is you've asked us not to be too harsh but it's stopping me expressing my opinion because I don't want to hurt your feelings.

If you have a thought please ker me know pm me if its harsh and feel free to block me once you have so I cant reply but an honest answer is better than a cryptic one

OK your profile name would put me off, as would the start of your profile.

It's a bit too personal on a site where most people are looking to make easy going connections.

I'm not saying you shouldn't tell people your story, we all have them but it's probably better to do so after you get chatting.

As it stands I'd worry about your emotional needs and if things would get too heavy too soon. "

I think you may be right reading it from an outsiders perspective I was merely trying to state that I want no strings as my family have to come first and wanted to separate my sexual wants and needs from that thank you for being honest and what you have said wouldn't and hadn't hurt my feelings x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Hairy isn't a problem.

I would say that you present yourself as a widower and father first which is admirable in general but you might consider how appealing it is to f you're looking for nsa sex.

Good luck

Your right with one thing you say I am a father first before anything else a widower I am but thsy does not define me but thank you for your feed back glad the hair isnt a problem for you though haha x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What's with all these help make my profile more appealing threads? Surely if someone likes you they'll respond?

You could write a masters degree novel on your profile but if i/we don't fancy you it ain't gonna happen.

We get knocked back too as a couple, it's all part of Fab, just go with it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What's with all these help make my profile more appealing threads? Surely if someone likes you they'll respond?

You could write a masters degree novel on your profile but if i/we don't fancy you it ain't gonna happen.

We get knocked back too as a couple, it's all part of Fab, just go with it

But there is nothing wrong with asking for help?

Sometimes people need an outsiders perspective.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"Hairy isn't a problem.

I would say that you present yourself as a widower and father first which is admirable in general but you might consider how appealing it is to f you're looking for nsa sex.

Good luck

I'm not being harsh but you have defined yourself by those things. As I said in general that's admirable but in terms of what you say you want from fab it probably isn't the best way to go.

Hairy has never been a problem for me, I rather like it

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What's with all these help make my profile more appealing threads? Surely if someone likes you they'll respond?

You could write a masters degree novel on your profile but if i/we don't fancy you it ain't gonna happen.

We get knocked back too as a couple, it's all part of Fab, just go with it

But there is nothing wrong with asking for help?

Sometimes people need an outsiders perspective. "

Thank you that's exactly what I was looking for it's not like I can ask a friend or family member here look at this profile see what you think lol this isnt a dating site after all lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Hairy isn't a problem.

I would say that you present yourself as a widower and father first which is admirable in general but you might consider how appealing it is to f you're looking for nsa sex.

Good luck

I'm not being harsh but you have defined yourself by those things. As I said in general that's admirable but in terms of what you say you want from fab it probably isn't the best way to go.

Hairy has never been a problem for me, I rather like it

That at least is a plus x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What's with all these help make my profile more appealing threads? Surely if someone likes you they'll respond?

You could write a masters degree novel on your profile but if i/we don't fancy you it ain't gonna happen.

We get knocked back too as a couple, it's all part of Fab, just go with it

But there is nothing wrong with asking for help?

Sometimes people need an outsiders perspective.

Thank you that's exactly what I was looking for it's not like I can ask a friend or family member here look at this profile see what you think lol this isnt a dating site after all lol"

Search the forums, there are hundreds of similar threads

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What's with all these help make my profile more appealing threads? Surely if someone likes you they'll respond?

You could write a masters degree novel on your profile but if i/we don't fancy you it ain't gonna happen.

We get knocked back too as a couple, it's all part of Fab, just go with it

But there is nothing wrong with asking for help?

Sometimes people need an outsiders perspective.

Thank you that's exactly what I was looking for it's not like I can ask a friend or family member here look at this profile see what you think lol this isnt a dating site after all lol

Search the forums, there are hundreds of similar threads

None of which would've helped the OP since the advice given was different to the usual generic lose the dick pics and write more people are usually told.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Limiting yourself to only the ladys opinions could trip u up too watch what other guys do too

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By *ornyhappyCouple over a year ago

perth

"What's with all these help make my profile more appealing threads? Surely if someone likes you they'll respond?

You could write a masters degree novel on your profile but if i/we don't fancy you it ain't gonna happen.

We get knocked back too as a couple, it's all part of Fab, just go with it

Yes there are lots of similar posts, if you don't want to offer advice then just scroll on by.

Is it so wrong for people to ask for opinions or advice?

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By *amissCouple over a year ago

chelmsford

Hello OP, firstly I like your chest hair

I would have to agree about the username. You also mention at the end about being a widower, don't think you need that, apart from that, I like your profile. I'm sorry for your loss.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Hello OP, firstly I like your chest hair

I would have to agree about the username. You also mention at the end about being a widower, don't think you need that, apart from that, I like your profile. I'm sorry for your loss."

Thanks for your kind words I also happen to very much like your profile x

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By *ankie303Woman over a year ago

Weirdsville South Coast Dorset

Afternoon op, as said above, the username is an instant repellent (yes you can change it!) It may make fabbers sound heartless but it does have the opposite effect of trying to sound like your looking for NSA fun. We all have a personal life away from fab that's non of fabs public profile business (I say all, theres possibly a few who have no life beyond fab lol) x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Afternoon op, as said above, the username is an instant repellent (yes you can change it!) It may make fabbers sound heartless but it does have the opposite effect of trying to sound like your looking for NSA fun. We all have a personal life away from fab that's non of fabs public profile business (I say all, theres possibly a few who have no life beyond fab lol) x"

I can only change the name on here if I pay or delete my profile and start again I wont pay call my tight but I'd rather keep my money to wine and dine a beautiful woman or spend it on my children so I'm stuck with it

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By *amissCouple over a year ago

chelmsford

"Hello OP, firstly I like your chest hair

I would have to agree about the username. You also mention at the end about being a widower, don't think you need that, apart from that, I like your profile. I'm sorry for your loss.

Thanks for your kind words I also happen to very much like your profile x"

Ah thank you and I don't have a hairy chest

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By *amissCouple over a year ago

chelmsford

I wouldn't say the name is a deal breaker for most

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wine and dine a beautiful women. You gonna take her McDonald’s then. It’s only a fiver

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Wine and dine a beautiful women. You gonna take her McDonald’s then. It’s only a fiver

KFC lol

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By *eardsandboobsCouple over a year ago

north of lincoln

From my point of view without knowing you is the name is very off putting. Not sure why you would put that as a user name unless your maybe looking for pity. Your here to make sexy friends and have sexy adventures so make your profile the same.

Pics are not overly imaginative and you have the standard dick on its own pic (not sexy) . You don’t have face pics I’m guessing so people don’t recognise you but happy to show a very unique tattoo. You don’t accom and you have the horrid I don’t bite crap on your profile.

If you were in a couple on here before then you must know what it takes to meet people and get messages or did you just rely on your partner to attract people in for you ?

Also reading the above where you won’t pay £5 to make your profile better for yourself shows that you most likely are only here for a quick shag and not to make the friends your profile indicates you want to make

But good luck

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By *ankie303Woman over a year ago

Weirdsville South Coast Dorset

Wine and dine a beautiful women. You gonna take her McDonald’s then. It’s only a fiver

KFC lol"

Pretty sure £5 wouldn't cover a kfc box meal lol

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By *orticiaWoman over a year ago

Wirral

I’ve changed my name & never had to pay. You do need to be a site supporter I think, but it’s only a few quid!

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By *orticiaWoman over a year ago

Wirral

For me, the name is an instant delete from my inbox.

But, if I did look at your profile, the text makes it sound like your looking for a date (nice person you can have fun & adventures with) and you talk about your wife too.

So now I have an image of a guy who is looking for a romantic partner but is still in love with his wife, who also has kids.

The first word in my mind is RUN!!

Of course you still love her, that’s totally normal - but if you are looking for NSA fun, you need to change your name & profile text to reflect that.

Take the advice. Spend the fiver & change your name. Re-write your profile, put some more interesting photos up & keep the dick picks to one!

I hope that helps. I’m very sorry for your loss

M x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me, the name is an instant delete from my inbox.

But, if I did look at your profile, the text makes it sound like your looking for a date (nice person you can have fun & adventures with) and you talk about your wife too.

So now I have an image of a guy who is looking for a romantic partner but is still in love with his wife, who also has kids.

The first word in my mind is RUN!!

Of course you still love her, that’s totally normal - but if you are looking for NSA fun, you need to change your name & profile text to reflect that.

Take the advice. Spend the fiver & change your name. Re-write your profile, put some more interesting photos up & keep the dick picks to one!

I hope that helps. I’m very sorry for your loss

M x"

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