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Finding it hard

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?!

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate

It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

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By *etite HandfulWoman  over a year ago

Chester

Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes. "

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you."

Good idea (why the heck didn't I think of that ) thank you

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you "

You'll kiss a lot of frogs before you find the Prince

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By *iggyStarjumpsMan  over a year ago

Stockport


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you."

Good to know there are women doing this.

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you."

great idea

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It’s a numbers game. There are a lot of people on here (admittedly a disproportionate number of single guys) who don’t seem to ‘get it’. It’s a swinging site, not a shag warehouse, and the more experienced people understand that there needs to be some kind of connection, even if it’s just physical.

You will, I’m sure, be inundated with single line messages to the effect of ‘wanna fuck?’ And you shouldn’t be discouraged by this; there are a lot of members and a good number of them are great.

Keep looking and there’s every chance you will find what you’re looking for. Good luck!

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you "

i dont think name and shaming folks is allowed or the way forward either to be honest... x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As already said 2 weeks isn't long and when looking for something very in particular it will always take a little longe, a little bit of patience and spend some time chatting to people and sure whatever you're looking for will end finding you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?! "

try putting your age limit up a bit x a lot of slightly older guys on here are just looking for what you are wanting x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you

i dont think name and shaming folks is allowed or the way forward either to be honest... x"

I wouldn't normally. But you don't know what he did. It was pretty despicable

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By *wholeLotOfRosieWoman  over a year ago

Pontypridd

You won’t meet a fwb on mail. Try socials, clubs and parties as you’ll meet lots of people in one go. I met my fwb at a party. I wouldn’t have met him at all if we’d just been exchanging mail as he wasn’t my ‘type’ based on just his profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

However I'll remove it as it probably just makes me sound bitter!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bleed the Lone Ranger he must have been tied up with tonto!!!

Take your time as it’s better to be happy with a meet rather than just grap anything that comes along.

Best of luck on here as it can be difficult at times.

Tony

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By *ebjonnsonMan  over a year ago

Maldon

But you say you are not looking for single guys?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Honestly, for finding a Fwb, I think a more conventional dating site would yield better results.

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By *xploringfantasies2019Couple  over a year ago

Watton

We are finding it the same OP but theres no pressure on our end just enjoying it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you

i dont think name and shaming folks is allowed or the way forward either to be honest... x

I wouldn't normally. But you don't know what he did. It was pretty despicable "

your right i dont know, its a major pet hate of mine, but it can get you banned or make you look not the best... both of which i dont want, we need as many new genuine members as possible. pity your not closer to Merseyside

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You won’t meet a fwb on mail. Try socials, clubs and parties as you’ll meet lots of people in one go. I met my fwb at a party. I wouldn’t have met him at all if we’d just been exchanging mail as he wasn’t my ‘type’ based on just his profile. "

Thank you, that is such a good idea. So much more efficient too!

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men"

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages "

Ah right. I’m not sure how that would work tho,if she’s blocked single males but doesn’t want married men?

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside

well she could search for single fellas herself rather than them contact her

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you

i dont think name and shaming folks is allowed or the way forward either to be honest... x

I wouldn't normally. But you don't know what he did. It was pretty despicable "

Forums or chat isn't in rule book to name or shame love

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"well she could search for single fellas herself rather than them contact her"

Are really that's sound advice there love

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages

Ah right. I’m not sure how that would work tho,if she’s blocked single males but doesn’t want married men? "

Well good luck OP

Happy Christmas

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"well she could search for single fellas herself rather than them contact her"

Good thinking

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages

Ah right. I’m not sure how that would work tho,if she’s blocked single males but doesn’t want married men? "

It just means for the moment no new men can message me. I do this while I chat with people who have already made contact or while I look for and make contact with men first. Otherwise I'm just constantly fighting to keep on top of my inbox. I can't talk to too many people at once, can't get to know anyone that way.

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages

Ah right. I’m not sure how that would work tho,if she’s blocked single males but doesn’t want married men?

It just means for the moment no new men can message me. I do this while I chat with people who have already made contact or while I look for and make contact with men first. Otherwise I'm just constantly fighting to keep on top of my inbox. I can't talk to too many people at once, can't get to know anyone that way. "

there you go...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It’s a numbers game. There are a lot of people on here (admittedly a disproportionate number of single guys) who don’t seem to ‘get it’. It’s a swinging site, not a shag warehouse, and the more experienced people understand that there needs to be some kind of connection, even if it’s just physical.

You will, I’m sure, be inundated with single line messages to the effect of ‘wanna fuck?’ And you shouldn’t be discouraged by this; there are a lot of members and a good number of them are great.

Keep looking and there’s every chance you will find what you’re looking for. Good luck!"

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"As already said 2 weeks isn't long and when looking for something very in particular it will always take a little longe, a little bit of patience and spend some time chatting to people and sure whatever you're looking for will end finding you "

Thank you

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside

as said earlier, clubs, though iv not been, party/group meets are a brilliant way to meet people with no pressure, i attend, get invited, to a regular group meet and not everyone plays, some just chat and have a few drinks

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Honestly, for finding a Fwb, I think a more conventional dating site would yield better results. "

Oh really? Why? Maybe I'll consider that

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"as said earlier, clubs, though iv not been, party/group meets are a brilliant way to meet people with no pressure, i attend, get invited, to a regular group meet and not everyone plays, some just chat and have a few drinks "

Thank you for this, I think it's a great idea, I'll look out for one in future as this is just getting me down and takes up far too much time!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages

Ah right. I’m not sure how that would work tho,if she’s blocked single males but doesn’t want married men?

It just means for the moment no new men can message me. I do this while I chat with people who have already made contact or while I look for and make contact with men first. Otherwise I'm just constantly fighting to keep on top of my inbox. I can't talk to too many people at once, can't get to know anyone that way. "

That’s a good idea,best of luck on here

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Others have probably mentioned this, but your profile says looking for men, but not attahced/married, and it also says not looking for single guys (and you've blocked single guys fom messaging).

Maybe it's my extreme age, but I'm confused...

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"as said earlier, clubs, though iv not been, party/group meets are a brilliant way to meet people with no pressure, i attend, get invited, to a regular group meet and not everyone plays, some just chat and have a few drinks

Thank you for this, I think it's a great idea, I'll look out for one in future as this is just getting me down and takes up far too much time!"

just reset what your idea of what you was expecting from Fab and start again with a open mind... even for single ladies it can take time and be overwhelming. start with focusing on one type of meet whatever that may be

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"Others have probably mentioned this, but your profile says looking for men, but not attahced/married, and it also says not looking for single guys (and you've blocked single guys fom messaging).

Maybe it's my extreme age, but I'm confused..."

read through the ladies and others messages for your answer

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/12/19 16:26:18]

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"You won’t meet a fwb on mail. Try socials, clubs and parties as you’ll meet lots of people in one go. I met my fwb at a party. I wouldn’t have met him at all if we’d just been exchanging mail as he wasn’t my ‘type’ based on just his profile.

Thank you, that is such a good idea. So much more efficient too! "

Sorry to disagree with the other poster, but you’re just as likely to find a fwb from someone messaging you as anywhere else,. Just as in real life things happen when you least expect it. Talking from experience

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Honestly, for finding a Fwb, I think a more conventional dating site would yield better results.

Oh really? Why? Maybe I'll consider that"

Most men are likely open to the idea of FWB. In other words, you don't need to be on this site to find it.

This site is great because of the transparency (you know what people are looking for sexually).

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Honestly, for finding a Fwb, I think a more conventional dating site would yield better results.

Oh really? Why? Maybe I'll consider that

Most men are likely open to the idea of FWB. In other words, you don't need to be on this site to find it.

This site is great because of the transparency (you know what people are looking for sexually)."

By better results you reckon though, in what way? Do you think less one-off mentality?

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"Honestly, for finding a Fwb, I think a more conventional dating site would yield better results.

Oh really? Why? Maybe I'll consider that

Most men are likely open to the idea of FWB. In other words, you don't need to be on this site to find it.

This site is great because of the transparency (you know what people are looking for sexually).

By better results you reckon though, in what way? Do you think less one-off mentality? "

Just be wary on here men will say anything to try get in your knickers make sure you get to know them first and take your time and meet in a public place safety first good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Honestly, for finding a Fwb, I think a more conventional dating site would yield better results.

Oh really? Why? Maybe I'll consider that

Most men are likely open to the idea of FWB. In other words, you don't need to be on this site to find it.

This site is great because of the transparency (you know what people are looking for sexually).

By better results you reckon though, in what way? Do you think less one-off mentality?

Just be wary on here men will say anything to try get in your knickers make sure you get to know them first and take your time and meet in a public place safety first good luck xx"

I've noticed

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

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By *appycouple300Couple  over a year ago

North Dorset

Totally on this site

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just my opinion but the the description on your profile seems like it’s code for wanting a relationship and I imagine that will be what’s putting men off on a site like this.

I find when you don’t set any expectations or pressures up front (e.g. don’t tell people you want to be friends and see them regularly), then things flow more naturally and you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for

For example, I wouldn’t mind meeting someone regularly but whenever I get a message from someone saying they are “looking for something regular” I get put off by it. It feels like they’re asking for a lot before even getting to know each other.

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"Just my opinion but the the description on your profile seems like it’s code for wanting a relationship and I imagine that will be what’s putting men off on a site like this.

I find when you don’t set any expectations or pressures up front (e.g. don’t tell people you want to be friends and see them regularly), then things flow more naturally and you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for

For example, I wouldn’t mind meeting someone regularly but whenever I get a message from someone saying they are “looking for something regular” I get put off by it. It feels like they’re asking for a lot before even getting to know each other."

No I disagree they are letting you know exactly where you stand before getting into meanlss conversation to find your not compatible x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Dating site might be better, but maybe not

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off. "

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?! "

We just live too far apart. That’s all that’s wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's unrealistic to find that after two weeks, yes.

Ah OK, more patience required. Thank you

You'll kiss a lot of frogs before you find the Prince "

Truth...

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Liverpool


"To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?! "

Nope, not unrealistic at all. That's how I am and as a result I've now got some fantastic women and couples as friends. Going to socials has achieved that by and large and by waiting for the right person or people to come along. Keep the faith! Xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Also use the verifications to vet them. If they have been a year and have none. Danger danger danger.

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Liverpool


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you."

Yep, there are some great guys out there who would be made up to actually get a message! I've never been approached on Fab in several years, so if you're selective and carry out due diligence you'll find one of the good ones.

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,"

Lmao you know nothing .. have you even been to a club ..

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off. "

i disagree. iv never been to a club, neither have most of our group yet we are all definitely genuine

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,"

sensible comments

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By *ap d agde coupleCouple  over a year ago

Broadstairs

We are a couple so bit harder to answer,we actually know 3 or 4 lovely men on here so don’t think it’s unreasonable for you to find

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just my opinion but the the description on your profile seems like it’s code for wanting a relationship and I imagine that will be what’s putting men off on a site like this.

I find when you don’t set any expectations or pressures up front (e.g. don’t tell people you want to be friends and see them regularly), then things flow more naturally and you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for

For example, I wouldn’t mind meeting someone regularly but whenever I get a message from someone saying they are “looking for something regular” I get put off by it. It feels like they’re asking for a lot before even getting to know each other.

No I disagree they are letting you know exactly where you stand before getting into meanlss conversation to find your not compatible x "

I see your point but I disagree. I don’t need to know that information to find out if we are compatible or not. It’s unnatural (imo) to try and force a regular thing by mentioning it immediately. How can you blindly suggest to someone you don’t know, that you want to try something long term? You just have to let it happen...

Of course everyone’s different. That’s just my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have found if you really want a guy who understands swinging properly and how to treat someone correctly. Find a guy from a swinging couple who has wife’s permission to play separately (but get it from her mouth). They understand best the required behaviour and seem so better all round.

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,

sensible comments "

Again I disagree why should she change her preferences because they dont meet mens expectations on here ...

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,

Lmao you know nothing .. have you even been to a club .."

yes several and socials, around 100 meets in the last 10 years, yet can count on one hand the amount from clubs or socials. On the other hand your not even verified.

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"Just my opinion but the the description on your profile seems like it’s code for wanting a relationship and I imagine that will be what’s putting men off on a site like this.

I find when you don’t set any expectations or pressures up front (e.g. don’t tell people you want to be friends and see them regularly), then things flow more naturally and you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for

For example, I wouldn’t mind meeting someone regularly but whenever I get a message from someone saying they are “looking for something regular” I get put off by it. It feels like they’re asking for a lot before even getting to know each other.

No I disagree they are letting you know exactly where you stand before getting into meanlss conversation to find your not compatible x

I see your point but I disagree. I don’t need to know that information to find out if we are compatible or not. It’s unnatural (imo) to try and force a regular thing by mentioning it immediately. How can you blindly suggest to someone you don’t know, that you want to try something long term? You just have to let it happen...

Of course everyone’s different. That’s just my opinion."

Because then you have the option not to chat to that person there are plenty of guys genuinely looking for long term play

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,

Lmao you know nothing .. have you even been to a club ..yes several and socials, around 100 meets in the last 10 years, yet can count on one hand the amount from clubs or socials. On the other hand your not even verified."

This profile ain't but I have been to clubs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,

Lmao you know nothing .. have you even been to a club ..yes several and socials, around 100 meets in the last 10 years, yet can count on one hand the amount from clubs or socials. On the other hand your not even verified."

Nor have you.

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,

Lmao you know nothing .. have you even been to a club ..yes several and socials, around 100 meets in the last 10 years, yet can count on one hand the amount from clubs or socials. On the other hand your not even verified.

Nor have you. "

missed the green tick have you?

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By *onty1971Man  over a year ago

London St Helier Trier

As someone wrote you will kiss many frogs before you find the Prince.

Do preserve and have fun.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That’s a picture. Never actually met anyone who could verify you as genuine.

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"That’s a picture. Never actually met anyone who could verify you as genuine. "
youre not new so you should by now know what a green tick is, or are you just being funny.

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"That’s a picture. Never actually met anyone who could verify you as genuine. "

You can apologise when you’re ready. I

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No one has verified you yet. You’ve had over a year. Wow that’s bad.

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"No one has verified you yet. You’ve had over a year. Wow that’s bad. "

What are you on about, you can’t be that ignorant of the difference between a green flag and green tick are you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes I was wrong but won’t apologise to you. As you soon set onto that lady. You’re exactly the problem with men on here

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"Yes I was wrong but won’t apologise to you. As you soon set onto that lady. You’re exactly the problem with men on here "

It’s you that has the problem , if you can’t apologise for making false allegation, typical of the kind of couple that spoils this site.

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"As someone wrote you will kiss many frogs before you find the Prince.

Do preserve and have fun."

That was me, I'm really wise

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What ones that meet people? Or ones that won’t meet unattractive men.

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"Yes I was wrong but won’t apologise to you. As you soon set onto that lady. You’re exactly the problem with men on here

It’s you that has the problem , if you can’t apologise for making false allegation, typical of the kind of couple that spoils this site."

Says the man who jumped on me about what's on my profile did I ask for any advice no I didn't... so mind your own and leave the couple alone

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you.

Good to know there are women doing this."

lots do actually and lots of men moan about it

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport


"Yes I was wrong but won’t apologise to you. As you soon set onto that lady. You’re exactly the problem with men on here

It’s you that has the problem , if you can’t apologise for making false allegation, typical of the kind of couple that spoils this site.

Says the man who jumped on me about what's on my profile did I ask for any advice no I didn't... so mind your own and leave the couple alone "

you had a go at me first without even knowing me from Adam.

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"Yes I was wrong but won’t apologise to you. As you soon set onto that lady. You’re exactly the problem with men on here

It’s you that has the problem , if you can’t apologise for making false allegation, typical of the kind of couple that spoils this site.

Says the man who jumped on me about what's on my profile did I ask for any advice no I didn't... so mind your own and leave the couple alone you had a go at me first without even knowing me from Adam. "

Again your wrong I simply disagreed with you you jumped in with your size 9s and I'm now done speaking to you have a good evening

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By *heHookyMonsterMan  over a year ago

Liverpool


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you.

Good to know there are women doing this.

lots do actually and lots of men moan about it "

That's surprised me to be honest with you. I've not had a single approach in all the time I've been on here. The success I have had is largely down to having attended socials and people getting to know me. Wondering if my profile is lacking now

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By *udewhennudeMan  over a year ago

newport

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

Not true, plenty of “more genuine “ people on here. How can you say they are more genuine at clubs, when everyday we get threads started complaining about single guys at clubs. The truth is the op shouldn’t restrict her options, she’ll find what she wants eventually. There is no one place better than others to find what she’s looking for,"

this is sensible.... 1. dont restrict your options until you know what the site and scene is about

2. and there really isn't no one place better than others as everyone is different so its basically trial and error or horses for courses so to speak. so yes i think it was a sensible comment

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"Yes I was wrong but won’t apologise to you. As you soon set onto that lady. You’re exactly the problem with men on here

It’s you that has the problem , if you can’t apologise for making false allegation, typical of the kind of couple that spoils this site.

Says the man who jumped on me about what's on my profile did I ask for any advice no I didn't... so mind your own and leave the couple alone "

hes simply having a disagreement just like you are with me? no harm in that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

But genuinely. Ignore messages coming in, they’ll just be generic crap. Get out and meet people. It’s so much safer being somewhere like a club where if it doesn’t work it isn’t the end of the night. But find guys you like and message them. There’s hundreds of local men on here. Read their verifications. It’s the best and safest way to go forward.

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By *im4play4uMan  over a year ago

Hemel Hempstead

Well all the unnecessary judgements being made on people from reading their profiles kind of answers why it's so hard for this girl to find someone she wants to regularly play with. Why are a lot of men on here so cock sure and frankly, miserable?!!

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By *ilth500Man  over a year ago

Merseyside


"But genuinely. Ignore messages coming in, they’ll just be generic crap. Get out and meet people. It’s so much safer being somewhere like a club where if it doesn’t work it isn’t the end of the night. But find guys you like and message them. There’s hundreds of local men on here. Read their verifications. It’s the best and safest way to go forward. "

why ignore messages coming in?

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By *angbangFantasyWoman  over a year ago

London


"To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?! try putting your age limit up a bit x a lot of slightly older guys on here are just looking for what you are wanting x "

Why would she do that? Just so she can get messages from men she doesn't want?

That's sure a silly thing to say

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By *exy4youxxWoman  over a year ago

Pontefract


"But genuinely. Ignore messages coming in, they’ll just be generic crap. Get out and meet people. It’s so much safer being somewhere like a club where if it doesn’t work it isn’t the end of the night. But find guys you like and message them. There’s hundreds of local men on here. Read their verifications. It’s the best and safest way to go forward. "

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?! "

It's no unrealistic. Stick to what you want. Make guys get to know you online first. Make them spend a while getting to know you. Then you will hopefully get rid off the

Guys looking for a one-off fuck.

Guys looking for another notch on the bedpost.

Guys who don't respect you.

Guys who are not prepared to spend time getting to know you.

Weirdoes

Timewasters.

Fantasists.

Etc.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It says you’re not looking for single guys,then at the bottom it says you don’t want attached/married men

probably using tgat particular filter to stop the sheer volume of single fella messages

Ah right. I’m not sure how that would work tho,if she’s blocked single males but doesn’t want married men?

It just means for the moment no new men can message me. I do this while I chat with people who have already made contact or while I look for and make contact with men first. Otherwise I'm just constantly fighting to keep on top of my inbox. I can't talk to too many people at once, can't get to know anyone that way. "

Keep on doing things your way. You know what is right for you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just my opinion but the the description on your profile seems like it’s code for wanting a relationship and I imagine that will be what’s putting men off on a site like this.

I find when you don’t set any expectations or pressures up front (e.g. don’t tell people you want to be friends and see them regularly), then things flow more naturally and you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for

For example, I wouldn’t mind meeting someone regularly but whenever I get a message from someone saying they are “looking for something regular” I get put off by it. It feels like they’re asking for a lot before even getting to know each other."

It may put some men off and may not put some men off.

There are lots of men (including myself) on here looking for a long term partner.

Hopefully finding a partner on here means they like having sex and are a bit sexually adventurous.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Dating site might be better, but maybe not"

The problem with a dating site is she may (or may not) find a sexually boring partner.

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you.

Good idea (why the heck didn't I think of that ) thank you "

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Dating site might be better, but maybe not

The problem with a dating site is she may (or may not) find a sexually boring partner. "

She may or may not find a sexually boring partner on here

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off. "

I disagree; I've been to 6 different clubs to a total of 14 visits as a single guy, and a further 3 visits as a couple, and can honestly say I find more genuine people via Fab for private meets. I've never met any cliquey, uncommunicative, rude or arrogant people on a private meet.......

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

I disagree; I've been to 6 different clubs to a total of 14 visits as a single guy, and a further 3 visits as a couple, and can honestly say I find more genuine people via Fab for private meets. I've never met any cliquey, uncommunicative, rude or arrogant people on a private meet......."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

I disagree; I've been to 6 different clubs to a total of 14 visits as a single guy, and a further 3 visits as a couple, and can honestly say I find more genuine people via Fab for private meets. I've never met any cliquey, uncommunicative, rude or arrogant people on a private meet.......

"

Yes. To an extent, you’re not wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We recommend going to clubs. You’ll find the more genuine people there. It scares all the fantasists off.

I disagree; I've been to 6 different clubs to a total of 14 visits as a single guy, and a further 3 visits as a couple, and can honestly say I find more genuine people via Fab for private meets. I've never met any cliquey, uncommunicative, rude or arrogant people on a private meet......."

Very true

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never once found anyone arrogant in a club. Everyone has always been friendly and welcoming. We go twice a month to different clubs and always find the same.

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman  over a year ago

kinky land

Year's ago one of the many benefits of going to a club was the 11pm pub kick out time

Ie married men that were just down the pub as far as the Mrs was concerned; stood out as they filed out.

Switch off incoming messages and hunt for what takes your fancy

Try clubs and socials too

Enjoy the hunt and good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thank you so much everybody

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By *biza007Man  over a year ago

Manchester

It is realistic and I guess most of us are looking for the same as you Vistas ... but somehow it doesn’t happen

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By *eviantdeeliteCouple  over a year ago

Cheltenham


"Try messaging people first and not just selecting from people mailing you."

This was how I did it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"To find what I'm looking for on here, what am I doing wrong?!

I'd like a regular friend, someone who doesn't just want to have sex and go. I do want attraction, and someone who is normal and a decent person! Is this unrealistic?! "

This is a swingers site,sounds to me like you want a dating site.

Even then you may struggle to find what you are looking for,not because you are unattractive or unpleasant,but because other people have their own agendasl

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