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Bad meets?
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Hi all
Was just wondering...we've been lucky enough to have some amazing meets on here, but we've had some terrible ones too.
Why is it no matter how many amazing ones we have it's the bad ones that still stick out? Is it just us? Can you ever get over the bad ones?
Thanks in advance!
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By *ongarMan
over a year ago
maidstone / Tunbridge Wells |
It’s like a lottery, on the last year twice I’ve pretended to feel unwell and left, twice I wished I had pretended and left.
Smelly people are the worst.
Sweat smelling funny people are the best  |
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You have to get over them and not let them spoil what you want to get out of being part of this site, well that’s my take on it and my outlook on life, people and situations in general. Let me give you my first experience of fab although this was not a in the flesh meet but that was going to be the end result, I was chatting to a couple new to the site ( like me ) and conversation went well and we ended up deciding to chat on Skype which I didn’t actually have at that point but downloaded it so things could progress and we could all see each other anyway they started to do certain things on cam which led to me unfortunately getting carried away going against my better judgement and getting naked long story short they took screen shots of me and tried to black mail me and instantly left here but I did manage to report them, after putting my profile hidden and staying off here for a few days I came back and gave it another go and instantly got chatting to another couple only this time it was purely face to face conversation via Skype and I received my first verification and hopefully that will progress into more so my point is the good ones definitely more than make up for the bad ones or we wouldn’t still be on here  |
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I suppose it's like everything in life, we have to put things down to experience and move on. maybe we remember the bad meets more as we probably seek answers as to why was it bad? What did I do wrong? why didn't I spot that the other person was false/fake?
Having these 'bad' meets teach us lesson and informs our decision making for the future.
Sex is a very strong driver, so being taken in like Jack a couple of messages above is understandable.
Stay safe and happy singing to you all x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On a very rare occasion we’ve had a bad meet, we’ve have been able to laugh it off, chat about it together and move on, that’s the best way to deal with it. The bad meets are character building and add to the rich tapestry of swinging. It also makes you appreciate the nice people and the good meets x |
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" The bad meets are character building and add to the rich tapestry of swinging. It also makes you appreciate the nice people and the good meets x"
That's very true - couldn't have put it better myself, thank you. |
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"Hey Jack, what a really crappy first experience, impressed you have said you won't be beaten and came back. Happy fabbing and I hope you get lots of better responses in the future."
My faith has been restored and with every bad experience we learn a valuable lesson |
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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago
shropshire |
"Hi all
Was just wondering...we've been lucky enough to have some amazing meets on here, but we've had some terrible ones too.
Why is it no matter how many amazing ones we have it's the bad ones that still stick out? Is it just us? Can you ever get over the bad ones?
Thanks in advance!
"
yes weve had really good ones and bad ones but we just laugh about the bad ones and learn from them what not to do again |
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I had met with a guy a few times. Mostly soical but got friskier esch time. One night we arranged a hotel. Had a few drinks went to the room. Im not gonna lie. .i hadnt had any for a while so was pretty darn horny. Gave him a really good blow job and he cum in my mouth really quick. Now i saw this as victory on my part. Not sure how he saw it tho as when i came back in from brushing my teeth he had gone ...   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I once met a guy who was clearly either using an old picture or was close friend with photoshop, his verifications made him out to be god of oral and that, but he licked me out like an excited puppy and when I was on top sat completely still. He was worse than a dildo, dildo don't saliva. The only sloppy head you should give is a bj |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had met with a guy a few times. Mostly soical but got friskier esch time. One night we arranged a hotel. Had a few drinks went to the room. Im not gonna lie. .i hadnt had any for a while so was pretty darn horny. Gave him a really good blow job and he cum in my mouth really quick. Now i saw this as victory on my part. Not sure how he saw it tho as when i came back in from brushing my teeth he had gone ... "
Oh wow!  |
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"I had met with a guy a few times. Mostly soical but got friskier esch time. One night we arranged a hotel. Had a few drinks went to the room. Im not gonna lie. .i hadnt had any for a while so was pretty darn horny. Gave him a really good blow job and he cum in my mouth really quick. Now i saw this as victory on my part. Not sure how he saw it tho as when i came back in from brushing my teeth he had gone ... "
This is so bad.... |
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By *OXO2018Couple
over a year ago
Norfolk |
Think there part and parcel of swinging.
Our good meets have certainly out weighted our bad.
Our worst has to be going to a couples house it was 12 in the afternoon and they where of there faces, each to there own but not our thing.
We got bad mouthed for not playing and time wasters. We meet another couple who had meet them (we didn't name and shame they did) and the women poohed the bed!!!!! And he got aggressive when he couldn't get hard.
Things definitely happen for a reson. |
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On the brightside as the bed was still made and all but un touched i thought sod it and stayed anyway in the hotel fresh sheets..we had both already paid half the room each...plus breskfast was included...
Didnt even bloke me after. Funnier still..or not funny. Few months later he messages me again. On my same profile although different pics, but it came across as he was messaging a stranger. Was very clear that he wasnt being arrogant thinking id meet him again but in fact he didnt realise it was me...that probably annoyed me more. " any hole is a goal" lol not lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had met with a guy a few times. Mostly soical but got friskier esch time. One night we arranged a hotel. Had a few drinks went to the room. Im not gonna lie. .i hadnt had any for a while so was pretty darn horny. Gave him a really good blow job and he cum in my mouth really quick. Now i saw this as victory on my part. Not sure how he saw it tho as when i came back in from brushing my teeth he had gone ... "
I would have stuck around a bit longer personally but each to their own ?? |
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"Think there part and parcel of swinging.
Our good meets have certainly out weighted our bad.
Our worst has to be going to a couples house it was 12 in the afternoon and they where of there faces, each to there own but not our thing.
We got bad mouthed for not playing and time wasters. We meet another couple who had meet them (we didn't name and shame they did) and the women poohed the bed!!!!! And he got aggressive when he couldn't get hard.
Things definitely happen for a reson."
shocking but funny....so glad I have standards that give the ability to sort out dodgy meets before they even happen  |
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"I had met with a guy a few times. Mostly soical but got friskier esch time. One night we arranged a hotel. Had a few drinks went to the room. Im not gonna lie. .i hadnt had any for a while so was pretty darn horny. Gave him a really good blow job and he cum in my mouth really quick. Now i saw this as victory on my part. Not sure how he saw it tho as when i came back in from brushing my teeth he had gone ... "
I think he was probably embarrassed from cumming so quickly unless you have false teeth and he was scared off by you taking them out to wash in the sink |
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"I had met with a guy a few times. Mostly soical but got friskier esch time. One night we arranged a hotel. Had a few drinks went to the room. Im not gonna lie. .i hadnt had any for a while so was pretty darn horny. Gave him a really good blow job and he cum in my mouth really quick. Now i saw this as victory on my part. Not sure how he saw it tho as when i came back in from brushing my teeth he had gone ...
I think he was probably embarrassed from cumming so quickly unless you have false teeth and he was scared off by you taking them out to wash in the sink "
Definitely not the latter lol |
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By *dquestCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough |
We had a bad meet that put us off the lifestyle for about 6 months. We always play same room to avoid this kind of thing and we do enjoy watching each other having fun. But, on this occasion at the very stsrt of play, Mr had his head buried in a lady's gorgeous fanny when the man receiving oral from the Mrs grabbed her head roughly and, with no prior agreement, thrust roughly a few times and came in her mouth.
The other couple left shortly after. Mr couldn't understand why things had ended so quickly. Later, Mrs told Mr what had happened. Needless to say Mr was furious and Mrs was very gun shy for a long time after.
One result is we are now very clear and up front with playmates on our preferences and expectations prior to play... no more of the, "just go with the flow," mentality. Another result is we tend to check in with eachother deliberately during play. When we ask each other, "having fun?" It isn't just bante.  |
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"We had a bad meet that put us off the lifestyle for about 6 months. We always play same room to avoid this kind of thing and we do enjoy watching each other having fun. But, on this occasion at the very stsrt of play, Mr had his head buried in a lady's gorgeous fanny when the man receiving oral from the Mrs grabbed her head roughly and, with no prior agreement, thrust roughly a few times and came in her mouth.
The other couple left shortly after. Mr couldn't understand why things had ended so quickly. Later, Mrs told Mr what had happened. Needless to say Mr was furious and Mrs was very gun shy for a long time after.
One result is we are now very clear and up front with playmates on our preferences and expectations prior to play... no more of the, "just go with the flow," mentality. Another result is we tend to check in with eachother deliberately during play. When we ask each other, "having fun?" It isn't just bante. "
Yep, we learned very fast to check with each other all the time, one of us remains completely sober and the other only has one or two drinks and if we don't like what's happening we say so at the time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi all
Was just wondering...we've been lucky enough to have some amazing meets on here, but we've had some terrible ones too.
Why is it no matter how many amazing ones we have it's the bad ones that still stick out? Is it just us? Can you ever get over the bad ones?
Thanks in advance!
"
Short answers is no not really, think it is accepted as it goes with the territory, but they change your approach and increase caution with in effect is a symptom of this.
Had some seriously bad meets that have gone seriously wrong and have have had long lasting consequences even today, even though we are olde and wiser.
Like chickenpox never really goes away. |
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I played as part of a couple on here for a good while and are worst came at a club. Playing with another couple in a hot tub and my partner suddenly stands up and says we should leave. I didn't question and we just left and went for a drink at a pub. Only then did she tell me the guy tried to bareback her. I was fuming but she deliberately did not tell me till we were away because she knew what I would have done |
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Most of my meets have been great and there have definitely been more good than bad. But some of the bad ones have been so awful that I don’t think I’ll ever get over them - the ones where I’ve cried for days afterwards, which have made me question why I’m doing this and if it’s in any way worth it. I’m definitely more cautious because of them, and my profile has got longer and more uncompromising every time. No-one gets to put a foot even a little bit wrong now, if anything bothers me when chatting or during a social, I’m done. But even that probably isn’t enough. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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had a few bad ourself which puts mrs off.
met a guy at his house and was clearly a pot head to the max but like daft cnts we carried on with the meet.half way through he jumps up grabs his phone and says his mrs is on way back( this was a single guys profile who could accom)
another 2 times (yes 2 guys but at different times of course)we met for a social first and it went great,got on like a house on fire,went to hotel on 1 occassion,our place on the other,did the deed to be ghosted afterwards both times.
makes us very cautious nowadays. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"had a few bad ourself which puts mrs off.
met a guy at his house and was clearly a pot head to the max but like daft cnts we carried on with the meet.half way through he jumps up grabs his phone and says his mrs is on way back( this was a single guys profile who could accom)
another 2 times (yes 2 guys but at different times of course)we met for a social first and it went great,got on like a house on fire,went to hotel on 1 occassion,our place on the other,did the deed to be ghosted afterwards both times.
makes us very cautious nowadays."
How can you prevent someone from ghosting you after a social/sex meet?
Can you see if they are going to ghost You , after the “ Had a great time , I’m home safe “ text ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"had a few bad ourself which puts mrs off.
met a guy at his house and was clearly a pot head to the max but like daft cnts we carried on with the meet.half way through he jumps up grabs his phone and says his mrs is on way back( this was a single guys profile who could accom)
another 2 times (yes 2 guys but at different times of course)we met for a social first and it went great,got on like a house on fire,went to hotel on 1 occassion,our place on the other,did the deed to be ghosted afterwards both times.
makes us very cautious nowadays.
How can you prevent someone from ghosting you after a social/sex meet?
Can you see if they are going to ghost You , after the “ Had a great time , I’m home safe “ text ?"
cannot see if they are going to ghost you but found it very rude and bad form |
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By *wesomeLolaCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough and Buckinghamshire |
I don't think we have had any truly bad meets yet. We've had some amazing ones, and they are usually couples that we've seen multiple times. We've had some OK meets, and on a couple of occasions one of us felt they might be taking one for the team, but still not really that bad. We have been known to drive too far for a meet that really wasn't worth it but it's hard to know that in advance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We had one meet we’re the guy of the couple tried to bareback L. He and his partner said “It’s ok he’s had a vasectomy “ !
Also had a guy recently where after a separate social he had a hotel room booked but when we got to the room he was too d*unk and slurring words. We didn’t play. Then he contacted us a week later but no second chances for that sort of behaviour. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi all
Was just wondering...we've been lucky enough to have some amazing meets on here, but we've had some terrible ones too.
Why is it no matter how many amazing ones we have it's the bad ones that still stick out? Is it just us? Can you ever get over the bad ones?
Thanks in advance!
"
some people dwell on the negative unfortunately its induced by the media it seems bad news sells newspapers and advertising space, glass half empty sort of thing, try and focus on the good experiences  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Liars..
When asked for recent photo sent one but on meeting was 8stone
Heavier than person on the pic"
well its Christmas chocolates are on special offer  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Liars..
When asked for recent photo sent one but on meeting was 8stone
Heavier than person on the picwell its Christmas chocolates are on special offer "
Polite social pnly certainly wasnt the cracker i was expecting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Liars..
When asked for recent photo sent one but on meeting was 8stone
Heavier than person on the picwell its Christmas chocolates are on special offer
Polite social pnly certainly wasnt the cracker i was expecting "
hey new glasses maybe |
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went to meet a cpl in stockton one eve went out clubbing all went back to their house they put the telly on and vanished we think they went to bed so we just let ourselves out and came home whats that all about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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had one crazy meet (not from here). Long story short..sat night he threw me on floor and had his fist clenched inches from my face and said 'I so want to punch you now'. Thankfully he never and he left me alone and i left tht house asap...so yeah this is prob why i take a while to meet guys now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Liars..
When asked for recent photo sent one but on meeting was 8stone
Heavier than person on the picwell its Christmas chocolates are on special offer
Polite social pnly certainly wasnt the cracker i was expecting hey new glasses maybe "
Honesty.. Rather than glasses. I don't mind big.. Chunky even but he sadly was excessive for my liking.. But lied.. Something you can't hide.. Age name place many do for security. Well
Lesson learnt |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We always remember the bad. Had one bad meet, to the point that police were recommended to me by others. I've just had to try and forget it (though my wine bottle recycling has increased since).
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We always remember the bad. Had one bad meet, to the point that police were recommended to me by others. I've just had to try and forget it (though my wine bottle recycling has increased since).
"
Your not alone xxx
Been to the point of injunctions and having actually move. But like a lot in this world, there is a very dark side to swinging |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was physically hurt quite badly by one of my first meets on here, however it made me a lot more wiser and cautious. I believe that’s why I’ve not had a bad meet since, because I don’t just jump straight into a meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah, I've had a couple of really bad meets, that were bad for different reasons.
One was bad because of a total lack of communication that would have affected the decision to play or not. The second was bad because I kept assuming that the best intentions were held. That is, until I woke up, naked and alone wondering what had happened, and later found photos of the play on fab.
Both of those happened in my early days of being on fab and I'm much more cautious and a lot less naive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Danger of meets that go wrong, past, present or future, is not to think "why me" or "why us", because unfortunately because of the nature of the beast, a lot more widespread than gets mentioned
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Call me fussy? But I always look in the background of their pictures.
If the place looks scruffy or tip I stay clear. If their house is like it often says very little for their personal hygiene and pride.
I maybe extreme but it often works. |
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Hi , new to the forums.
I often think WTF did I do that for am I stupid. I remember one where it was a party and we were all supposed to meet at a pub and go to the hosts house. We got there and all seemed fine till they said we are driving we will drop you back here.... so like a muppet I/we got in their cars and were driven 5 miles or so to the house... it was a fun evening but the drivers were all d*unk so ended up walking back to the car. I was fine as quite fit but the chain smoking bloke struggled, I stuck with him ( never leave a team member behind ) could have been very different though..
Approach meets very differently now though .. social first with singles, always have a backup plan and let someone know where you are. I have a close friend who I text the address to . He doesn’t ask details just that I should text him by a certain time. Never had an issue since.
Matt
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By *urvySub87Woman
over a year ago
Near Wellingborough |
I had a really bad meet once (not off here) the guy said that he was a dom, we went on a date which went great then went back to his. Turned out he wasn't a dom at all he was just into extreme humiliation.
I ended up in A an E with a black eye,split lip and severe concussion.
I learned my lesson the hard way, now I never drink alcohol on a first date/meet and always make sure someone knows where I am and who I'm with. Safety first |
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"I had a really bad meet once (not off here) the guy said that he was a dom, we went on a date which went great then went back to his. Turned out he wasn't a dom at all he was just into extreme humiliation.
I ended up in A an E with a black eye,split lip and severe concussion.
I learned my lesson the hard way, now I never drink alcohol on a first date/meet and always make sure someone knows where I am and who I'm with. Safety first"
OMG what a horrific experience glad i have hubby on our meets ,shows how vulnerable we can be |
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By *urvySub87Woman
over a year ago
Near Wellingborough |
"I had a really bad meet once (not off here) the guy said that he was a dom, we went on a date which went great then went back to his. Turned out he wasn't a dom at all he was just into extreme humiliation.
I ended up in A an E with a black eye,split lip and severe concussion.
I learned my lesson the hard way, now I never drink alcohol on a first date/meet and always make sure someone knows where I am and who I'm with. Safety firstOMG what a horrific experience glad i have hubby on our meets ,shows how vulnerable we can be "
It was scary, afterwards he told me that he actually wanted to see if I would let him stamp on my head. That meet put me off for over 6 months |
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Glad you persisted there are some lovely people on here 