FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > It shouldn't be this hard!
It shouldn't be this hard!
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. Don’t lose confidence in yourself We all crave that nervous excitement and it’s wrong for ppl to mess ppl about... don’t be put off... A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." in my early years on sites like this this is what i suffered from women, booked hotels, travelled, travelling expenses and time off    | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." My best suggestion. If this is the first occasion its happened see if there were any indications red flags that looking back were there and hopefully you'll not suffer the same again. Delete block report move on. I'll leave the thread now, to the guys saying "I'd never do this".."it's guys like these that give guys a bad name" et al. | |||
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" Ps older guys are more reliable and grateful "Yes they are, wink wink, and maybe look at only arranging such things with people you have already met in clubs so you know they are genuine. | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Sorry to hear this and I hope you get your confidence back but as someone who's been on here a long time, my advice to you is if you have one or two men you keep in touch with, just stick with them. Then you can't be disappointed. I've been badly hurt over the years due to a couple of men using me to their own advantage. It took me a long time to recover but I eventually met someone else this year and I meet no one else now. I hope you get through this OP  x | |||
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"Use organised socials, clubs and parties to network OP. This is what I do now. I don't waste time trying to arrange things with individual people anymore. Another way is to post a coffee meet when you are planning to be out and about, no time wasted that way either. Many talk the talk but can't do the walk. Don't give up hope. Xx" While not the sole reason or even the main reason, but it is one of the reasons we don't do private meets. We now only meet in clubs. If we arrange something and it is a no show then it doesn't matter. We are in the club and can still have a good night. Sadly (especially at the younger end) this site, and others like it, is full of time wasters who think that it is funny to screw up somebody's evening. Add to that the married guys who will talk the talk thinking that they can escape the Mrs for an hour or two, and then can't. It makes arranging meets an absolute minefield of, usually, disappointment. BTW. I'm not just picking on guys here. Some couples are just as bad. | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." I feel your pain, I have a hotel booked and paid for In hull tomorrow night and I've been let down, looks like a night in my local pub instead  I suppose we live and learn. | |||
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"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions. "Agreed on the older guy thing, older men are still capable of letting you down. And do so plenty of times. | |||
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"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions. ""Drop your standard"? "Don't respect your decisions"? Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners. Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory. Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads. It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation. | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." . Sorry to hear your meet didn’t goes as planned although it sounds like you still had fun.One of the things I have learnt on the forums when planning a gang bang is invite double the guys you want as half will drop out.Also a lot of single ladies and couples find going to a club easier as the guys are already there so you can choose who you want to play with.If you choose to go to a club you can always message guys you are interested in to meet you there.Best of luck with Fabs | |||
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"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions.
"Drop your standard"?
"Don't respect your decisions"?
Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners.
Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory.
Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads.
It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation. "It's a drop in standard because she doesn't WANT to meet over 40s. She has her reasons and they need to be respected. People have their preferences, respect it and move on. | |||
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"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions.
"Drop your standard"?
"Don't respect your decisions"?
Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners.
Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory.
Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads.
It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation.
It's a drop in standard because she doesn't WANT to meet over 40s. She has her reasons and they need to be respected.
People have their preferences, respect it and move on. "I adore the morality that others are prepared to adopt on behalf of others. I do not think that offering advice, alternatives or suggestions can realistically be considered disrespectful. You may like to consider thinking that others have their views or/and opinions. Perhaps you may also like to respect this... oh and move along there's a good soul | |||
"To all the older guys saying older is better ... the two rudest people who have messaged in all the years I've been were older guys and really should have known much better! ". Undoubtedly that is possible and potentially may happen again. However, it is not the age (nor the gender, the social standing, the sexuality... etc etc) but simply the individual. | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Sorry to say it but...welcome to the world of fab...it happens to us all, but keep your chin up, there are some gems out there once you get through the asses...good luck x | |||
"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys.... Sorry to hear your meet didn’t goes as planned although it sounds like you still had fun.One of the things I have learnt on the forums when planning a gang bang is invite double the guys you want as half will drop out.Also a lot of single ladies and couples find going to a club easier as the guys are already there so you can choose who you want to play with.If you choose to go to a club you can always message guys you are interested in to meet you there.Best of luck with Fabs " I really dislike the term you can choose who you want.. its not a meat market, its often said like the guy has no say in the matter. ***news flash*** We all have the same choices yes please or no thanks.  | |||
"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions.
"Drop your standard"?
"Don't respect your decisions"?
Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners.
Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory.
Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads.
It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation. "And her choice not to meet anyone over 40. Just sour grapes as you are out of her age range, I'm guessing. | |||
"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Sorry to hear about you being messed around. Its a shame your not closer to the midlands and looking for an older guy. Better luck for the future and have a great xmas.  | |||
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"We don't get meets at all. I am a hideous being and a deal breaker in most scenarios. At least you are pretty and can even get the attention of that many people. Some people never get acknowledged at all." Are you serious?? | |||
"I think your problem is a lot of men on here (if they were completely honest) would prefer a one on one meet and enjoy a woman all to them self. A lots of couples get this too, many men just really wanting the sole attention of the woman. Sometimes expanding the scope to joining couples or gang bangs is just a means to an end to get laid in a tough market. However they talk the talk and are originally into the idea. But then reality comes home to roost. They realise that they really won't get the woman all to them self. They will have to perform in front of other guys. They will not be centre of attention. Then on reflection it's not so hot and frankly a bit of an effort. So in reality what your looking for is actually not that easy. You need to look for guys who have good experience and credentials when it comes to gang bangs. Some may talk the talk but in reality maybe not that turned on by the reality. Some people on here aren't swingers or into group sex, more it's just a hook up site." I was just going to say this. One of the reasons I never indicate interest in a gangbang or MMF / MMMF meet is I feel on the day I just won't be up for it, if I have taken the time to get to know a lady I'd want her all to myself at least the first time around. If I wanted to participate in a gangbang if turn up at a club and see what was on offer. | |||
"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys... My best suggestion. If this is the first occasion its happened see if there were any indications red flags that looking back were there and hopefully you'll not suffer the same again. Delete block report move on. I'll leave the thread now, to the guys saying "I'd never do this".."it's guys like these that give guys a bad name" et al." I’m very disappointed in you.... You missed out on quoting the guys saying “ Up your age range, and give us older guys a chance “ But to get back to the Op....... Don’t feel bad it’s not your fault..... Some days you are the pigeon and some days you are the statue...... Keep your head held high and don’t lower your standards.... | |||
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"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions.
"Drop your standard"?
"Don't respect your decisions"?
Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners.
Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory.
Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads.
It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation.
It's a drop in standard because she doesn't WANT to meet over 40s. She has her reasons and they need to be respected.
People have their preferences, respect it and move on.
I adore the morality that others are prepared to adopt on behalf of others. I do not think that offering advice, alternatives or suggestions can realistically be considered disrespectful.
You may like to consider thinking that others have their views or/and opinions. Perhaps you may also like to respect this... oh and move along there's a good soul"Telling the OP to change her preferences to suit you isn't respecting them. If she wanted to meet older guys she would. Simple | |||
"great figure op, 40 is kinda young for your cut off but it's your preference so us older fitter more experienced guys will have to get used to missing out "It's not young if it's what she wants. | |||
"great figure op, 40 is kinda young for your cut off but it's your preference so us older fitter more experienced guys will have to get used to missing out
It's not young if it's what she wants. "i did say "but its your preference" | |||
"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions.
"Drop your standard"?
"Don't respect your decisions"?
Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners.
Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory.
Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads.
It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation.
It's a drop in standard because she doesn't WANT to meet over 40s. She has her reasons and they need to be respected.
People have their preferences, respect it and move on.
I adore the morality that others are prepared to adopt on behalf of others. I do not think that offering advice, alternatives or suggestions can realistically be considered disrespectful.
You may like to consider thinking that others have their views or/and opinions. Perhaps you may also like to respect this... oh and move along there's a good soul"I adore the fact a woman who doesn't want to sleep with people over an age range has people trying to convince her that she should, that it would solve her problems. Respect her decisions and move on yourself. Also.. why wink us? Oh yes because you don't respect our age range either. | |||
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"Most guys on here are timewasters. Either cheating or Walter Mittys" thats an unfair statement in fact libellous, i will sue you | |||
"Most guys on here are timewasters. Either cheating or Walter Mittysthats an unfair statement in fact libellous, i will sue you "The trouble is truth is a defence in libel cases. | |||
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"Most guys on here are timewasters. Either cheating or Walter Mittysthats an unfair statement in fact libellous, i will sue you
The trouble is truth is a defence in libel cases."you have to prove 'most' | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Are you sure it wasn't the same guy with 4 profiles ? 
It is the way it is sadly if we get as far as aranging meeting we'd all ways turn up bar extreme circumstances, but sadly it's about personal integrity which is very much lacking these days in all walks of life. They, don't know you, never met you, not likely to (obviously) if didn't turn up. So no skin of their nose. | |||
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"I'm so sorry that happened to you. Its always so disappointing when you put so much effort in for nothing. At least you still had a good night though. As for the guys saying go older, stick yo your guns. You don't need to drop your standard just to have fun. There's some great guys in your age range and these idiots saying to change it are just showing they don't respect your decisions.
"Drop your standard"?
"Don't respect your decisions"?
Why would you think that being older means dropping of standards? With age comes maturity and experience. In many cases too, better manners.
Not respecting decisions is not really a fair criticism either, the suggestion of upping the age range was merely to increase probability and therefore was simply advisory.
Too many comments are banded about in general terms on forum threads.
It is fair to say that any criticism of an individual's behaviour (or in this case several individuals) is exactly that! An individual trait and not one constrained by age or any other generalisation.
It's a drop in standard because she doesn't WANT to meet over 40s. She has her reasons and they need to be respected.
People have their preferences, respect it and move on.
I adore the morality that others are prepared to adopt on behalf of others. I do not think that offering advice, alternatives or suggestions can realistically be considered disrespectful.
You may like to consider thinking that others have their views or/and opinions. Perhaps you may also like to respect this... oh and move along there's a good soul
I adore the fact a woman who doesn't want to sleep with people over an age range has people trying to convince her that she should, that it would solve her problems.
Respect her decisions and move on yourself.
Also.. why wink us? Oh yes because you don't respect our age range either."This is why I have my filters on, guys on here do not respect preferences at all. They think that because it's a sex/swingers site that it's a free for all. They're allowed to pursue women they find attractive but women are not allowed to reserve their time and energy to men they find attractive. | |||
"Thank you all for adding to this thread, whatever your views have been. I honestly thought I'd post it and it would get no responses! For all those saying I should up my age range, this is not something I'm going to do everyday, so I prefer to try and live out my desires. However unless I'm missing a secret dose of reliability given to all men at the age of 41, I'm not convinced there would be a change in fortune anyway. For the poster above who thinks my selection process was purely based on finding the top 10% on looks, you're incorrect. My main criteria were: - Have they put effort into their message and profile (on the assumption that if they did that they would be more likely to continue putting the effort in and show up) - Do they have previous group/gangbang experience? - Do they have good verifications over all? - Are they within reasonable distance? As it happens, I never asked for a face photo, I spend most of the time with a blindfold on so its a little pointless! When I get back to another one of these I'll just go for a club and avoid all this admin! But for now my confidence is a bit shot so I'm going to concentrate on meeting other couples through my couples profile with my partner. Marie xx " No need to explain. Even if it was based on looks or not, your vagina your rules | |||
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"We don’t even get to the meet phase. We always ask for a social first which the men seem fine with at first, then the minute you look to arrange a time and place everything goes silent. It’s highly frustrating and if I’m honest knocks my (Mrs) confidence every time. On the flip side we have met some wonderful men and couples who we have had some great fun with." This is so weird. Why do guys back out like that | |||
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"We don’t even get to the meet phase. We always ask for a social first which the men seem fine with at first, then the minute you look to arrange a time and place everything goes silent. It’s highly frustrating and if I’m honest knocks my (Mrs) confidence every time. On the flip side we have met some wonderful men and couples who we have had some great fun with." Just peeked at your profile and I'd find that hard to believe. You look like an attractive couple and a no pressure social should be a no brainer | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Your profile says you have a Master...single instant fuck guys do not understand that dynamic | |||
"We don’t even get to the meet phase. We always ask for a social first which the men seem fine with at first, then the minute you look to arrange a time and place everything goes silent. It’s highly frustrating and if I’m honest knocks my (Mrs) confidence every time. On the flip side we have met some wonderful men and couples who we have had some great fun with. Just peeked at your profile and I'd find that hard to believe. You look like an attractive couple and a no pressure social should be a no brainer " The trouble is that many say this, in their profiles "No Pressure" Couples/Singles if you arrange to meet, there is an expectation despite what they say, if they feel they are not going to get it many won't bother to turn up. This site people are here for one thing only and whatever is said there is one end game only. If you just looking for social then the local community centre. It is not a dating site, not saying you can't find Mr/Mrs right, but that's not what the lifestyle or the site is about. If you meet for social without and guarantee it will go further, most will move on to the next prospective opportunity. It is tough singles but it also tough for couples if are looking for something more from a meeting than just quick meet for sex | |||
"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Yet they moan we never reply Time wasters a lot of guys Real men don't exist in here Its a swing to low some want | |||
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"So sorry to hear that. And also sorry to read some of the comments on this thread about you widening your age range to get more guys interested. Really not sure that helps you..!! My experience is that a lot of guys on here love the ego boost of getting an invite, but then don’t have the balls to actually show up. I’ve benefited a few times from being available, able to travel and very well verified. Never bothers me to be a sub called off the bench - someone else’s loss!! Mind you - also known a couple “over book” for a gang bang because everyone talked of the drop out rate. And they got 18 guys turn up when they wanted about 7-8. That was one VERY crowded Premier Inn room!! Better luck in future!! Dan " Haha...noted. | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." | |||
"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Please don’t ever loose confidence in yourself because of the time wasters and keyboard warriors on here. A lot are cheating and looking for a quick thrill on line or sitting in a bar texting having a laugh with their mates over a drink, probably explains why it can be hard for the genuine single males on this site. I’ve found it a wonderful place to be and made some real true friends so don’t be disheartened as one door closes another opens. | |||
"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." one out of four ain't bad for this site. Its full of fantasists. | |||
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"But I suppose there are a lot of dreamers and timewasters on here." There sure are. I've just been ghosted by a guy who contacted me this morning and persuaded me to rearranged my schedule for today to go to his. The minute I say, ok lets go he's just deleting and not replying... | |||
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"Unfortunately a lot of people (men and women) are all talk. It's a shame " Exactly this....! | |||
"Unfortunately a lot of people (men and women) are all talk. It's a shame " This is so true. Maybe try a greedy girls night, OP. | |||
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"A week ago I posted a meet, looking for four guys to join me in a hotel room last night. Exciting, yes? It sure was for me! I spend ages looking through the messages, sifting out the profiles with fake photos, those that clearly haven't read my own profile, and after many hours I have found a number that look perfect. A few days later, I've chosen who I'd like. Oh, the first is "user no longer on site". No matter, I choose a replacement and send the invites! Two of my messages are read and never replied to. Another just never gets read. More replacements needed! Never mind, eventually I have the four perfect guys. They are fantastic, talkative, good verifs and they are all saying they are looking forward to it and won't let me down. The night arrives. I spend hours getting ready, I've bought new lingerie, paid for the hotel, arranged childcare. I've checked earlier everyone is still coming. I'm nervous, can I really manage four guys at once? Nervous with anticipation. Then a message, one guy drops out... He's not in the area, or even the right half of the country. But I'm ready, horny for the others. They've all confirmed in the last couple of hours. It'll be fantastic... The time comes, my anticipation levels through the roof after the days of waiting. But only one guy arrives, of the three remaining. The other two mysteriously disappeared. No message, complete silence. One guy who has been messaging all day about how much he was looking forward to it and couldn't wait, just gone. The one guy who did come was great, and a credit to Fab. But, a message to anyone else - single guys, girls or couples - that thinks it's good to mess people around: Stop and think about all the effort someone has put in, how much you are letting someone down, how unfair it is to block the space from someone else. So there I am today, with a little bit less confidence in myself and less faith in the Fab world; thinking of taking a bit of time out for now. I thought I would meet real men on Fab, I mostly dealt with boys..." Different challenges for different sexes really. Women have a problem with unreliability from prospective meets. Blokes have a problem getting such kinds of meets lined up in the first place. Can you imagine a man even being able to arrange for 4 ladies to meet for some fun with him? (Unless he comes packing a Beefy length in which case it's a doddle apparently) From experience, if you arrange such an event in future you're probably best inviting about 10 guys to attend, in which case you're likely to have between 2 and 5 show up? B | |||
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