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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I understand that swinging is about sex, obviously, and that there have to boundaries so that it doesn't become complicated/emotionally involved etc... but I find it difficult to be aroused without kissing, passion, some kind of connection. How do other people manage this balance, or am I the only one to find that this can make things tricky?! Thanks for your thoughts  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am a passionate person by nature. I get round the complications and emotions by being very selective of my playmates (safety in numbers) and setting clear boundaries for myself and sticking to them. It is always a risk but, if you are self aware and spot potential problems early it gives you time to back away before it becomes complicated |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am a passionate person by nature. I get round the complications and emotions by being very selective of my playmates (safety in numbers) and setting clear boundaries for myself and sticking to them. It is always a risk but, if you are self aware and spot potential problems early it gives you time to back away before it becomes complicated "
Thanks, that's helpful- I'm quite new to this, so I think I need to set myself some clearer ground rules and be more self aware. I never was very good at sticking to the rules  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Passion to many is a sexual turn on our boundary is very simple:
"It is the act and not the person's taking part" this makes it easier to do and uncomplicated providing you control your sexual appetite and who its with. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Passion to many is a sexual turn on our boundary is very simple:
"It is the act and not the person's taking part" this makes it easier to do and uncomplicated providing you control your sexual appetite and who its with."
I completely understand why you have that rule... I suppose I'm not very good at thinking of it as just 'an act'- I don't feel excited unless there's a bit more of a connection than that. Aw, maybe I'm not cut out for it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sex is an act, to which there are many topics and debates of preferences and tastes, once you know yours.
To carry out that act you need to be "horny" "aroused" "excited" so if a kiss does, it you do it thats what it is about, we share and see nothing wrong in many activities that can be done which is why to us its an act and not progressing any further. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive always enjoyed passionance (made that up), tho its an important boundary if ur meeting married/attached people if its more just about straight sexual activity.
a passionate kiss can rise me easier than than anything |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find that pure sexual need is what drives me with most meets. I have passion but rarely with my meet.
I find it harder to have passion with a fuck than not too.. but that's just me. And I know its all a bit weird.
I'm actually a very passionate person... But last few playmates we allowed that side out with we had issues.
I Just need to know I'm having sex and master is watching for me to be aroused.
Cali
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a very passionate person. Passionate about my partner, my career, the people and things I care about...but passionate about recreational sex with virtual strangers? No.That's the whole point of swinging to me...it's something different and separate to my usual life. Will we have an amazing, sensual, exciting and fun time? I would very much hope so, but I save passion for my real relationships... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand that swinging is about sex, obviously, and that there have to boundaries so that it doesn't become complicated/emotionally involved etc... but I find it difficult to be aroused without kissing, passion, some kind of connection. How do other people manage this balance, or am I the only one to find that this can make things tricky?! Thanks for your thoughts "
why does there have to be boundaries? i have no rules at all when it comes to sex, if it feels good do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I must be missing something here...I don't understand why you can't have passion in nsa sex?! Unless I'm completely misunderstanding what passion is? In the heat of the moment when I have a meet there is passion there...that desire to get naked and sweaty is still passion, and once we're both satisfied the passion subsides, and we go our separate ways!!
As for kissing, I can't have sex without it. It is a major turn on for me...I once had a meet where he wouldn't kiss me after I'd had him in my mouth and I just lost interest and had to call it a day because it killed the passion for me having to mentally stop myself going to kiss.
Being able to let go and have fun with all aspects of sex is what I enjoy about swinging...having that pure lustful connection for a couple of hours is so exciting, and then afterwards I have my space back and don't have to worry about anyone stealing the covers! x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I must be missing something here...I don't understand why you can't have passion in nsa sex?! Unless I'm completely misunderstanding what passion is? In the heat of the moment when I have a meet there is passion there...that desire to get naked and sweaty is still passion, and once we're both satisfied the passion subsides, and we go our separate ways!!
As for kissing, I can't have sex without it. It is a major turn on for me...I once had a meet where he wouldn't kiss me after I'd had him in my mouth and I just lost interest and had to call it a day because it killed the passion for me having to mentally stop myself going to kiss.
Being able to let go and have fun with all aspects of sex is what I enjoy about swinging...having that pure lustful connection for a couple of hours is so exciting, and then afterwards I have my space back and don't have to worry about anyone stealing the covers! x"
You said it just how I would have like to say it.  |
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Kissing is an essential part of sex for both of us, and as for passion, well why not? I'm always a teeny bit jealous that R can get into some sort of erotic trance when she's swinging, particularly when she's in a large group, and drifts off on a wave of very intense pleasure - men don't seem to get into this type of altered state. |
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