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New to swinging clubs
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Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended  ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great  |
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Visiting clubs for the first time can be very daunting.
My advice would be to chat to another couple and arrange a meet at one.
Remember to go with an open mind and the golden rule is No means No.
P |
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Hi! Theres no pressure to do anything u dont wanna do, if ur shy its ok im sure in time u will be chatting away to folk! Remember everyone was new at one point! Have some fun together in a room then have a wander about and see whats going on! Go for it! U will be chatting away in no time! But as i said no pressure to play whatsover and if anyone approaches u and they wanna play with u both or just ur wife if ur not interested say no thanks! Do itttt x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not participating in play is definitely not frowned upon
Its not as scary as you think it will be
Most people are happy to chat once you're there,you just have to say hi
What you do is entirely up to you,if you want to stay clothed and just check it all out that's fine,if you want to get involved that's also fine
No always means no
Always ask first before touching/joining in/getting too close
Consider what type of club you want to visit,eg a dress-down club,a clothing optional club,a wet club,etc and check out their rules and dress code before you go
Take a bag with toiletries,spare undies,wipes,lube,condoms and any other props you may need,most clubs have lockers for your stuff and will provide a towel
Some clubs have a fully stocked bar,others are BYOB
Consider if you want to go when it's only couples and single females,or when single makes are also allowed,as this varies depending on the club and the night |
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"Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great "
Just go! Everyone is new the first time, so everyone knows how you feel right now.
Clubs are really not so scary. Check out reviews, remember not all clubs are the same, and especially at different times of day/night. Don't feel the need to do anything you are not comfortable with, and just enjoy! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It'll be our first time at a club this weekend as you'd imagine were a tad nervous but the excitement it overruling the nerves already,we've read all the threads and have had some great advice from fellow Fab friends so it's just a case of getting through the door on Saturday night 
One other thing though
What's the preferred footwear inside a club especially one with a towel or underwear policy? |
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It's not frowned up on at all. (Well in general, may be it would at a dedicated hard swing night/party). But the club is somewhere to go enjoy and be your self. Lots of couple in clubs that don't play with others by choice. Sometimes they are just finding their feet or not found the right attraction/conditions. Some couples just like to watch, be watched or use the facilities. But remember only part of the club scene is the sex. A huge part of it is the social scene and having a great time with other likeminded people. You really don't need to have sex with others to be included and have a great time. Go alone, try it out and you'll see this is true for yourselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sometimes I go to clubs for a social outing with no sex. I go alone, honestly it's not a free for all orgy, swingers are more selective than that.
You'll be fine xx
I'm going to Kestrels near London tomorrow during the day, come along and I'll show you how carefree it is with no pressure to play ever. Remember no means no xx |
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Most of the clubs I've been to, there is a social area with a bar, just an area to have a chat and relax. Then an upstairs or separate area where play is happening. You'll find plenty of people milling around, checking who's in a room either watching or participating. You maybe asked by someone or a conversation in which it will lead to a question being asked 'fancy going into a room ?'.
The majority will be fine with you saying no, if at that time you're still a bit nervous tell them, honesty in a club is very common, and won't be held against you, and if you change your mind the offer is generally still on the table.
Clubs want you to come back as a regular, they'll try and make sure your first visit is memorable.
so go for it !
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great
Just go! Everyone is new the first time, so everyone knows how you feel right now.
Clubs are really not so scary. Check out reviews, remember not all clubs are the same, and especially at different times of day/night. Don't feel the need to do anything you are not comfortable with, and just enjoy!"
Agreed |
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By *rK MrsJCouple
over a year ago
Kidderminster |
"Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great "
In clubs it is up to you if you want to play or just chat, just go at your pace and enjoy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We visited a club today for the first time, both of us are a little shy as we prefer smaller groups than large groups of people. Anyway, it has been the single greatest thing we've done in our adventure so far. My heart was beating like a hardcore techno track as we walked up to the door but immediately as we queued people started to chat and say hi, quite honestly it was way more relaxed and people were far more friendly than going to a pub or bar. There was no pressure from anyone to play and most of the time we spent socialising in the bar and getting relaxed about everything ahead of our next visit. |
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We started swinging by visiting a club. Watched others having fun for a while then went into a crowded playroom and had a play together, it was incredibly erotic. Didn't swap then and there was no pressure to do so.
Next visit we had two soft-swaps and moved on to our first full swap a couple of visits afterwards. All very relaxed and erotic, a great introduction to the swinging scene. Also on 'neutral' ground unlike having your first meet at home.
Clubs really are a very sexy and safe way of meeting other for adult fun and games. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would suggest to go along and see for yourself what it's like in a club. There's no pressure to play at all ... Many couples go along to club's just to watch as it can be a very horny experience to see other people at it .. If you both feel horny then you could always go in a private room and just play with each other. The club's are a very liberating experience and I've met some really down to earth wonderful people .. A lot have now become good friends in vanilla world.. Hope you have a great time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great "
loads just stand and watch so the answer is always just feel comfortable with what you do, if you don't feel comfortable tell whoever is making you feel uncomfortable otherwise they may hang around, talking to people is always a good thing |
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"
One other thing though
What's the preferred footwear inside a club especially one with a towel or underwear policy?"
Once dressed down men have bare feet or flip flops. Women wear heels they can easily slip off or no shoes at all. |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great "
Just going and seeing for yourself weather you participate is down to. |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
We have never felt under pressure to play at a club in probably 15 years of attending. These days they do seem more like a social for meeting people for future meets than actually playing on the night, sometimes there seems to be more people in the smoking area than in the club lol so wouldn’t worry or over think it, just go for it, if you don’t enjoy it you can always leave but I’m sure all will be fine |
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I went to a club for the first time on my own last night, full of nerves and not knowing what to expect especially with being a single male.
Can honestly say there was no pressure to do anything what so ever!
On arrival I was greeted and asked if I'd been before, the answer was obviously no so he got a member of staff to give me a tour of the place and a chat about the rules.
After the tour went back to the bar, got myself a drink and just took it all in and ended up chatting with a few people.
No pressure, friendly people there and and felt quite comfortable.
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"Hey,
So a question that's been on my mind for a while about swinging clubs and it may sound very silly but may as well ask.
Me and the Mr are wanting to check out a swingers club however we are both pretty shy and new to swinging so with going to the club is it frowned upon for not participating in any play and just getting a feel for the place (no pun intended ) and see if we feel comfortable with it?
Too be honest any advice for newbies going to a club would be great "
I remember our first time and I think in our head we foolishly assumed going to a club would be like walking into a gangbang porn shoot.
That the Mrs would be groped on site and we would probably run away scared.
When we eventually stumped up the courage to attend, it was surprising to find out that it was less full on than an evening at flares. (indeed there was less flesh on show than a night out at flares.)
We sat and chatted to each other for a bit then went for a game of pool and chatted to another couple whilst playing doubles with them.
Just to stress how nervous we had been before hand, Mrs had only had 1 bf and Mr had never been with anyone else.
Everyone was very polite and really friendly and easy to chat to.
There are no expectations and sure people will check you out, but it's not like there is a big swingers network who will black ball you for not participating.
Mostly we meet new people every time we go.
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