 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Recently ive become involved in some NSA fun with a lovely girl however i sometimes struggle to climax, last a fair while and have a high drive, whereas she is used to quick frantic fumbles i guess and often complains shes getting sore way before ive even gotten close and it kind of ruins the experience for myself, ive tried lube, breaks and all sorts but as of yet still have not found a way round it. Any advice for a 25 year old still learning. It would be greatly appreciated. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I know how it feels mate. I'm not a guy who finishes quickly either.
Don't put pressure on yourself and let your partner know before hand.
Turn a positive into a negative and be upfront.
I'll just tell people, I've got a lot of stamina and I don't cum very quickly, no one has ever had a problem with it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
At 25 you should be spraying it around fairly quickly. Don’t mean to worry you but could be worth getting it checked out at the doctors.
At my age it’s a different matter. However, there’s only so much shagging a girl can cope with before she gets bored and / or sore.
I’m dating a girl that gets really turned on watching me wank after we’ve been fucking, and I get turned on by performing for her. Last night just before I came she took me in her mouth and swallowed the lot. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
My advice is to communicate with your partner. It's probably the way you've written it but it seems that you're concerned that it's ruining things for you when it's probably not great for her either.
Talk to her, find out what will work for you both. Use even more lube than you have already and reapply if needs be. Is there anything that gets you there more quickly? Is there something your partner could do that will help? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
she enjoys it but feels like shes doing something wrong, which she isnt at all.
I was thinking of dabbling in tantric meditation or something just to maybe heighten things a little. Ive tried plenty of lube, but with too much lube i can sometimes lose sensation a little. obviously i guess it then plays on my mind and that doesnt help either.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"she enjoys it but feels like shes doing something wrong, which she isnt at all.
I was thinking of dabbling in tantric meditation or something just to maybe heighten things a little. Ive tried plenty of lube, but with too much lube i can sometimes lose sensation a little. obviously i guess it then plays on my mind and that doesnt help either.
"
Yeah overthinking can make it worse. How about no penetration for a period of time. Just concentrate on foreplay together taking the time to find out what you both really like, this will take the pressure off you both and enable you to just relax and enjoy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Mate, if you think you have a medical problem you should of course get that checked out. Otherwise I wouldn’t worry so much, just relax and concentrate on giving your partner a great time. Once you get used to the situation mentally, then it’ll all come together (no pun intended, or maybe it was!)
I’m at the other end off the age spectrum and take medication to get it up. I often find it hard to climax, but I just ‘keep going’ and make sure my Lady is feeling satisfied, and then some. Often that gets me some special attention as a reward so it usually works out quite well.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Can take time to get used to having sex without being sore if you're not used to it. Lube won't help with that.
I'd probably concentrate more on foreplay. having sex more often (rather than for long periods) should help as well but dunno how you both feel about that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I know how it feels mate. I'm not a guy who finishes quickly either.
Don't put pressure on yourself and let your partner know before hand.
Turn a positive into a negative and be upfront.
I'll just tell people, I've got a lot of stamina and I don't cum very quickly, no one has ever had a problem with it. "
 positive into a negative
could be interesting |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Recently ive become involved in some NSA fun with a lovely girl however i sometimes struggle to climax, last a fair while and have a high drive, whereas she is used to quick frantic fumbles i guess and often complains shes getting sore way before ive even gotten close and it kind of ruins the experience for myself, ive tried lube, breaks and all sorts but as of yet still have not found a way round it. Any advice for a 25 year old still learning. It would be greatly appreciated."
hello OP
ever thought it could be due to medicatiion you might be on
tiredness
It's important to appreciate that the ability to 'come' is readily affected by a number of things – like how the person is feeling at the time, whether the atmosphere is erotic or romantic and whether the partner is skilled and loving. Bear these in mind
or if not talk to your partner first |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Worth getting it checked out at the docs. Contrary to popular belief, not many women who like to fuck for hours on end without a break and no orgasm from the partner. It’s very off putting. Personally prefer a quick cummer and enjoy the foreplay to a good round two |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"she enjoys it but feels like shes doing something wrong, which she isnt at all.
I was thinking of dabbling in tantric meditation or something just to maybe heighten things a little. Ive tried plenty of lube, but with too much lube i can sometimes lose sensation a little. obviously i guess it then plays on my mind and that doesnt help either.
"
Try not to get performance anxiety (both of you) just enjoy your intamacy and reassure her that making you cum is not essential and not coming is not an issult or criticism.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
For if it's personal questions but how much time are we talking + what kind of age is the woman?
It could be meds, also some guys actually can't cum at all simply because it's a psychological issue. They go half their life with many partners never having an orgasm, but can easily cum masturbating. When they find someone they truly feel comfortable with the flood gates open lol. It sounds like you are not comfortable to me so this is could be the problem. With guys like this it seems to go one of two ways, either they cum really quickly (minutes) or don't cum at all.
I know this might not sound good but it's better than having a physical medical problem |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
As a few people have stated, if you take any form of ssid it can have that effect. I take Sertraline to help with my Fibromyalgia, and it makes it sometimes impossible to cum at all, even by myself. It's just something I accept. Drs have said it will fade in time as most side effects do.
It's definitely worth mentioning to a Dr because if it isn't down to medication then it's usually a psychological issue that causes it. I find as well that if I'm particularly anxious about a situation it rarely works at all!
J x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
