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If we don't have a full swap swinging will stop

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Ok the title is a bit misleading... Another couple we both want to meet. We have had a couple of hot wife meets and Mr loveed getting the videos and reclaiming me. The sex we have when he takes me back is so raw and passionate, it's now my favourite kind of sex. He's recently said he wants to put the brakes on the hot wife thing for now and find something for us both. He dosnt mean a 3some, he wants a same room swap/4some type meet but we can never agree on couples. I've got a feeling our whole swinging life will end up stopping if we can't find something we are both happy with. I'm not sure I want to let him just be with another woman. It's fine when we have threesomes but I think I would feel differently with a full swap. I don't want to stop swinging

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Full swap couples meets are very different to a 3sum, you aren't wrong there. In our experience they end up being a wife swap rather than a shared experience, might as well play separate. If he's not bi I'd go with alternating FFM and MMF maybe?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

We have a lady we meet, and I suggested a MMF as we haven't tried that yet but although he's not pushy I know it's the full swap he wants. I'm fine watching him with our lady friend because I'm a part of it but I don't know if I would deal well with him being with a woman without me. Can a jealous woman be ok with her man fucking someone else ?

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan over a year ago

salisbury

Separate rooms?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We have a lady we meet, and I suggested a MMF as we haven't tried that yet but although he's not pushy I know it's the full swap he wants. I'm fine watching him with our lady friend because I'm a part of it but I don't know if I would deal well with him being with a woman without me. Can a jealous woman be ok with her man fucking someone else ? "

In short, no you can't be ok with it. I know everyone says try something and then you'll really see how you feel towards it, but if you already feel this strongly against it beforehand then actually doing the deed will just amplify the feelings you already have.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's not for everyone, if you are dead set against it I wouldn't recommend trying. It does sound a little bit like perhaps this should have been discussed between you before you did the hot wifing however, as ultimately he may conclude that this isn't equitable. Not saying it always has to be, just anticipating possible complaints

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I suppose it depends on how you see jealousy. We are poly but I still get a little tinge of jealousy from time to time. My jealousy comes from a fear of being abandoned but we also communicate with each other completely openly. Knowing that my jealousy comes from an internal feeling and not from the actions of my partner helps us navigate those feelings in a healthy way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Separate rooms?"

He's happy with any way

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

When he first asked me to meet a guy I didn't really understand it and made sure he knew that I would never be ok with him and a woman other than a 3some. He was fine with that and said that wasn't why he was asking me to do it and that's when I started reading about hotwife to understand and thought I did until he now wants to give that a rest when I've started to enjoy it.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

If you aren't happy with seeing him or knowing he's with someone else then don't do it. But also on the flip side, stop the hotwife scenarios as well. That's not fair on him. You can't have your cake and eat. Maybe you aren't cut out for swinging, or you both need a complete break from it to sort things out between you both.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If she jealous it won’t work believe me I has first hand dealings with that all well and good when they get attention but not happy other way blew a few out for it even though told them at the start ah well onwards I march good luck

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By *alcon43Woman over a year ago

Paisley

Go to a club and maybe try out the scenario somewhere neutral. Talk about it and make sure it’s what you both want.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you aren't happy with seeing him or knowing he's with someone else then don't do it. But also on the flip side, stop the hotwife scenarios as well. That's not fair on him. You can't have your cake and eat. Maybe you aren't cut out for swinging, or you both need a complete break from it to sort things out between you both. "

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By *wansfeetCouple over a year ago

Guisborough

"When he first asked me to meet a guy I didn't really understand it and made sure he knew that I would never be ok with him and a woman other than a 3some. He was fine with that and said that wasn't why he was asking me to do it and that's when I started reading about hotwife to understand and thought I did until he now wants to give that a rest when I've started to enjoy it.

Have you spoken about why he's chamges his mind? Especially when hotwifing was his idea in the first place?

Kiki x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Go to a club and maybe try out the scenario somewhere neutral. Talk about it and make sure it’s what you both want. "

I think that's going to be the best way forward. Thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Have you spoken about why he's chamges his mind? Especially when hotwifing was his idea in the first place?

Kiki x"

We was trying to talk about it the other night and he gets a bit tongue tied trying to explain. Kind of how he did when he asked me to do it in the first place lol . I think we will go to a club and go from there. Swinging has made our fantasies more adventurous and our sex life kinkier than ever.

Do people have a lull from swinging ?

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By *ornyhornytwoCouple over a year ago

Bradford

Yes people have a lull from swinging for tons of reasons x

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By *wansfeetCouple over a year ago

Guisborough

Have you spoken about why he's chamges his mind? Especially when hotwifing was his idea in the first place?

Kiki x

Do people have a lull from swinging ? "

Absolutely, we have peaks and troughs, just like anything in life. Sometimes real life gets in the way, other times it's nice to just go back to being a couple for a while without adding anyone else into the mix. Also, we find having a break can make the next experiences more exciting and heated

Kiki x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Thank you Kiki you have been very helpful x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would you be willing to try a couples meet but only soft swing for the first time? That way you could both gauge your feelings.

We only soft swap same room at the moment. The same room rule is because we get our enjoyment from watching each other give and receive pleasure.

We insist on four way play so no one feels left out and so far it’s been wonderful.

We have talked about eventually doing a full swap but it will always be same room.

You never know how you’re going to react to a situation until you experience it. Honest communication is the key.

Hope you manage to find your solution OP

V x

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By *ibertine_LifestyleCouple over a year ago

Sheerness

Just like vivabs we only do four way play. We only ever did soft swap until a few weeks ago and did a full swap but in the way that we were still as a four. So the girl went down on me whilst R fucked her so I could see and I sucked her partners cock. Also tried both girls on the bed kissing whilst R fucked her and the girls partner fucked me. We have both said we would never do it where he goes off with someone and I go off with someone even if we are in the same room. It's just not how we play. We swing to bring an extra dimension to OUR sex life, not just use it as an excuse to fuck other people. Also breaks are normal, we recently come back after almost 2 years! Xx

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By *etro1940sCouple over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames

"Go to a club and maybe try out the scenario somewhere neutral. Talk about it and make sure it’s what you both want. "
very sound and sensible advice - as a couple you can negotiate the framework of any sensual, sexual and erotic adventures ... it is always a balance between individual and couple needs , best wishes in this

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just like vivabs we only do four way play. We only ever did soft swap until a few weeks ago and did a full swap but in the way that we were still as a four. So the girl went down on me whilst R fucked her so I could see and I sucked her partners cock. Also tried both girls on the bed kissing whilst R fucked her and the girls partner fucked me. We have both said we would never do it where he goes off with someone and I go off with someone even if we are in the same room. It's just not how we play. We swing to bring an extra dimension to OUR sex life, not just use it as an excuse to fuck other people. Also breaks are normal, we recently come back after almost 2 years! Xx"

That sounds perfect and we say the same thing. Swinging doesn’t define us. It’s an added extra for us both. It’s so erotic watching Abby work her magic on both males and females. A tangle of four is heavenly.

And an added extra, the reclaim sex is out of this world

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By *ert n BerylCouple over a year ago

middlesbrough

Hi OP,

We took a break for 5 months last year whilst we got married. When we first came back and went to our usual club, I lasted 20 minutes before we left. A woman was eyeing up hubby and I felt extremely jealous. We got home and chatted it through. We then eased in gently.

We’ve done same room swap twice, once at club and once at hours. I found the club experience better as the other girl and I were playing too. At one point we were riding each other’s man whilst we were kissing the men loved it. The two bits of advice I’d give, firstly don’t ever do anything you’re not happy with and cause upset. Secondly, always talk things through. Communication is so important.

Hope everything works out OP xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Tha k you for all your advice . I feel a bit easier about the 4some situation so I think that's what we will try next. Probably at a club too. Never know I might love watching him with someone. I know I love a 4some

Thank you all x

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By *uriousTwosomeCouple over a year ago

Manchester

We have FFM, MMF, and MFMF’s... each are different, and offer a different enjoyment & a different level of angst. But as a couple, we give as well as take. Not saying take one for the team or do something you don’t want, but maybe think of some meets as just going to be okay, ie not your favourite

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By *wo4FemCouple over a year ago

Birmingham

Why don't you try a social with a couple first that way you can get to know them a bit and it may put you at ease a bit more. You can always discuss the night once you get home.

Mr2

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