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Single males
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By *opite_x OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
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By *arl17Man
over a year ago
Central Portugal |
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
Obviously can’t take any sort of rejection easily.. from experience it’s in no way your fault so don’t sweat it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X |
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By *opite_x OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X"
Yeah! I mean I was on here a few years ago and I had some really good meets, but this time around I’ve been on here just over a week and I’ve got nearly a thousand unread mails in my inbox... it’s hard to sort through all the junk! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections). |
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My guess (and of course I don’t condone it) is that many start off with good intentions but after putting thought into messages on promising looking profiles they get disheartened with facing a wall of silence or at best, a blunt reply. This of course doesn’t consider the ignorants or uneducated, which appear to be rife.
Long story short politeness costs nothing but you can’t legislate for idiocity! |
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"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X
Yeah! I mean I was on here a few years ago and I had some really good meets, but this time around I’ve been on here just over a week and I’ve got nearly a thousand unread mails in my inbox... it’s hard to sort through all the junk!"
Therein lies the problem - how do you find the ones you might want to meet in that 1000 without reading them - which no sane person would want to do! |
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By *opite_x OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X
Yeah! I mean I was on here a few years ago and I had some really good meets, but this time around I’ve been on here just over a week and I’ve got nearly a thousand unread mails in my inbox... it’s hard to sort through all the junk!
Therein lies the problem - how do you find the ones you might want to meet in that 1000 without reading them - which no sane person would want to do!"
Well I’m trying to make a dent...  |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
Oh I know that feeling  |
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I almost always reply. The only ones I delete are "hi how r u". As it clearly says in my profile I will.
The rest I answer, and I rarely reject anyone either. I let them know which club I'll be at and when, and say I'll be happy to chat to them if they come and say hi
Funnily enough....99% never show up |
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By *opite_x OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
Oh I know that feeling "
Haha we’re probably getting the same guys too! |
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"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
We share your sentiments precisely. |
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By *homnessMan
over a year ago
Inverness |
"Block men and search for suitable guys yourself maybe? My club buddy did that very successfully on here for years."
Agree, best possible way.
We do that as a couple as well as we dont want to be pestered by bunch of dickheads. Yet, we enjoy an mmf every now and then. It's best to find suitable guys yourself. |
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"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X
Yeah! I mean I was on here a few years ago and I had some really good meets, but this time around I’ve been on here just over a week and I’ve got nearly a thousand unread mails in my inbox... it’s hard to sort through all the junk!"
Filters. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block men and search for suitable guys yourself maybe? My club buddy did that very successfully on here for years.
Agree, best possible way.
We do that as a couple as well as we dont want to be pestered by bunch of dickheads. Yet, we enjoy an mmf every now and then. It's best to find suitable guys yourself. "
She said she was way more successful doing it that way. Guys she messaged first generally wouldn't let her down or go queit and were the ones who had decent profiles who made an effort so were more likely to be genuine and up for meeting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Getting any single female to message back is a miracle lol"
Its not actually if you have a decent profile and pics and/or send a decent message with pics attached. I think profile pic is key as its what they first see in their inbox and will either make you stand out for the right or wrong reasons ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's hard to know where to start with a first message. Usually it's just a way of letting someone know you're interested. Most single guys have been ignored, blocked or rejected so many times on here it does become hard to keep on making effort. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections)."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block men and search for suitable guys yourself maybe? My club buddy did that very successfully on here for years.
Agree, best possible way.
We do that as a couple as well as we dont want to be pestered by bunch of dickheads. Yet, we enjoy an mmf every now and then. It's best to find suitable guys yourself.
She said she was way more successful doing it that way. Guys she messaged first generally wouldn't let her down or go queit and were the ones who had decent profiles who made an effort so were more likely to be genuine and up for meeting. "
It's not hard at all. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
Oh I know that feeling
Haha we’re probably getting the same guys too!"
Probably, getting a single male to meet you at a club is even worse, so many agree a time and date then don't show! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think these threads give single guys a bad name and a hard time . We’ve been on here a long time we reply to messages or just delete messages as we see fit but never experience abuse so to be honest I find it difficult to believe you suffer the “barrage of abuse” you claim |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a bi male I can only sympathise.
I seem to get a few 'white van man' types who seem to genuinely believe:
- I am obsessively interested in them based on a one-sentence profile ('single, virile, highly-sexed, horny, heavy-cummer 4 all') and a pic of his builder’s crack framed by an ill-fitting pleather outfit in a room littered with a pram, rigger boots, tins of skol lager and a reflection of his wedding pictures in the mirror.
- I can turn up at their house immediately (because by being located anywhere in Britain means that you can quickly walk, drive or fly 'right now')
- They have fallen in love with you(r holes) based on one message exchange and no face pics
And that's just the tip of the iceberg.
Women, I do sympathise. |
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Truth is demand far outweigh supply here & we're talking ratio 2000:1.
You can only expect non-challant, excuses, rants etc etc from those it favours.
For me, Fab's now for perving as I'm back to good old pulling elsewhere.
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Think these threads give single guys a bad name and a hard time . We’ve been on here a long time we reply to messages or just delete messages as we see fit but never experience abuse so to be honest I find it difficult to believe you suffer the “barrage of abuse” you claim "
Actually it can and does happen when you turn someone down, just because you haven't experienced it, it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. |
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"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X"
I’m unverified and I am never like this. I’m always respectful and try to have a cheeky conversation. I just think it is either a generation thing or mentality unfortunately we don’t always think the same. sad really it just one bad guy and that’s it |
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"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections)."
I so agree with this bud!!! Of course I’m not condoning but this they just need to understand that how It is for us guys on here
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections).
I so agree with this bud!!! Of course I’m not condoning but this they just need to understand that how It is for us guys on here
"
Actually no, I don't need to understand someone abusing me for either being rejected or ignored. |
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"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections).
I so agree with this bud!!! Of course I’m not condoning but this they just need to understand that how It is for us guys on here
Actually no, I don't need to understand someone abusing me for either being rejected or ignored. "
With the up most politeness this was not aimed at you this was aimed at the guys that don’t use respect  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve tried most approaches from polite to quirky and 99% of messages get ignored
I’ve only lashed out a couple of times through sheer frustration and regretted it when I did it. Don’t do it any more.
But the rejection does wear you out and you get to the point where it’s hardly worth bothering I’m afraid. |
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Very respectful (and respectable) single male here! ALWAYS send face photos with what would hopefully be considered a decently put together opening message, but the numbers game seems to show most of them don't get read due to you ladies being bombarded daily. X |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections).
I so agree with this bud!!! Of course I’m not condoning but this they just need to understand that how It is for us guys on here
Actually no, I don't need to understand someone abusing me for either being rejected or ignored.
With the up most politeness this was not aimed at you this was aimed at the guys that don’t use respect "
Apologies, I thought you were having a dig at women not understanding how it was for men. |
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By *inamicMan
over a year ago
Blackpool |
The numbers game is an issue, i have a female friend on here and she gets like 200 messages daily, so not always the ladies fault If they haven't replied. That and for many and probably obvious reasons single men outdo women on here last time i heard was 100 to 1 so it's not easy. I'd also consider it a lucky escape if a guy messages with abuse after a kind no thank you or no reply then they wasn't worth the time anyway.
I struggle meeting women on here but i have never sent abuse or would ever dream of doing it at all, if it's a no thank you then no harm done. Some single men on here need to learn to deal with rejection. You're not going to be everyones cup of tea as attraction has to work both ways |
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"The numbers game is an issue, i have a female friend on here and she gets like 200 messages daily, so not always the ladies fault If they haven't replied. That and for many and probably obvious reasons single men outdo women on here last time i heard was 100 to 1 so it's not easy. I'd also consider it a lucky escape if a guy messages with abuse after a kind no thank you or no reply then they wasn't worth the time anyway.
I struggle meeting women on here but i have never sent abuse or would ever dream of doing it at all, if it's a no thank you then no harm done. Some single men on here need to learn to deal with rejection. You're not going to be everyones cup of tea as attraction has to work both ways"
Spot on! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The numbers game is an issue, i have a female friend on here and she gets like 200 messages daily, so not always the ladies fault If they haven't replied. That and for many and probably obvious reasons single men outdo women on here last time i heard was 100 to 1 so it's not easy. I'd also consider it a lucky escape if a guy messages with abuse after a kind no thank you or no reply then they wasn't worth the time anyway.
I struggle meeting women on here but i have never sent abuse or would ever dream of doing it at all, if it's a no thank you then no harm done. Some single men on here need to learn to deal with rejection. You're not going to be everyones cup of tea as attraction has to work both ways"
Absolutely ... what's totally absurd is the fact they believe they're decent people. I personally think if you're rude on here then you're rude in life! Same with honesty tbh |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"The numbers game is an issue, i have a female friend on here and she gets like 200 messages daily, so not always the ladies fault If they haven't replied. That and for many and probably obvious reasons single men outdo women on here last time i heard was 100 to 1 so it's not easy. I'd also consider it a lucky escape if a guy messages with abuse after a kind no thank you or no reply then they wasn't worth the time anyway.
I struggle meeting women on here but i have never sent abuse or would ever dream of doing it at all, if it's a no thank you then no harm done. Some single men on here need to learn to deal with rejection. You're not going to be everyones cup of tea as attraction has to work both ways"
Well said. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections).
I so agree with this bud!!! Of course I’m not condoning but this they just need to understand that how It is for us guys on here
Actually no, I don't need to understand someone abusing me for either being rejected or ignored. "
You don't need to understand - but understanding people's motivates can often be helpful. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
You’ve got incredible looks, fruity cider and a massive strap on you like to use.... you sound bloody incredible I’m astonished you aren’t getting the “jumping through hoops” you so describe aha! X I’d bend over backward excuse the pun xD we could take that in turns ;P x I’m below your age limit anyway but amazing profile I wish you massive luck cause you sound and look awesome x |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections).
I so agree with this bud!!! Of course I’m not condoning but this they just need to understand that how It is for us guys on here
Actually no, I don't need to understand someone abusing me for either being rejected or ignored.
You don't need to understand - but understanding people's motivates can often be helpful. "
The abusive ones motives are clear, they are pissed off that they can't get laid on what they think is a sex site. I'm not going to pander to or try to understand their fragile little egos. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No excuse for their behaviour.
Add to your profile that if you don't reply it is because you aren't a match and/or that you have so many messages, it is taking forever to get through them etc... that kind if thing. Less of a knock back for guys. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I got one from a guy yesterday that i declined politely explaining i am looking for black guys currently and he replied that he wasnt interested in meeting me anyway because i was fat.
Made me laugh though.
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"I’ve tried most approaches from polite to quirky and 99% of messages get ignored
I’ve only lashed out a couple of times through sheer frustration and regretted it when I did it. Don’t do it any more.
But the rejection does wear you out and you get to the point where it’s hardly worth bothering I’m afraid. "
In the same club Bud |
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Interesting reading through this forum I have to say I have all messages blocked 99% of the time and I just look at local updates and people that I put on my hot list and if I'm in the mood I message! Mostly I get a very positive response occasionally a polite no thank you you're not my type and that's absolutely cool. I think I've been lucky on the whole I've met some great people and had amazing experiences. Always me for a social first and if they're not prepared to do that tough |
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"I’ve tried most approaches from polite to quirky and 99% of messages get ignored
I’ve only lashed out a couple of times through sheer frustration and regretted it when I did it. Don’t do it any more.
But the rejection does wear you out and you get to the point where it’s hardly worth bothering I’m afraid.
In the same club Bud "
While I'd never 'lash out' I can understand it to a degree. Single guys ARE predominantly ignored for sure. A lot of women (and some couples) rightly complain about the kind of approaches they get, but there is a vicious circle that exists due to messages from otherwise decent men getting lost in the numbers of messages received. My suspicion is that in the end the vast majority of decent single men will give up and leave Fab, which many couples in particular would be happy with, based on the way a lot of single men are treated in clubs. No doubt Fab and the scene will survive and thrive should that happen, but those self-same folks will then complain that they can no longer get into clubs for free, or anywhere near as cheaply, with some clubs no longer able to survive without the money the single guys bring in. To balance this out its clear a lot of single men have a poor approach and a lack of respect in their advances, online and in the clubs themselves. For me the whole scene would be a sad place if any group were excluded, but we all have to play a positive part in making it work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And in an ideal world I would reply to every single message and politely reply to/decline the ones I wasn’t interested in, and I did try to do that at first but there’s just too many..."
Use your filters |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation. well said..totally agree..but the douchebag guys actually make it easier for us genuine fellas.lol
X"
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"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation. well said..totally agree..but the douchebag guys actually make it easier for us genuine fellas.lol
X"
I used to think that, but I don't think so in my case. Genuinely pleased to hear someone feels its so. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
There is no magic answer to this one unfortunately - fact of the matter is there are a disproportionate number of single men compared to single ladies and couples (the figure is actually about 15:1 not 100:1 as mentioned earlier) and the vast majority of those men simply don't "get" the site and how it works, or adapt their approach when they find they're not getting anywhere - they sign up with hopes and expectations incorrectly set, adopt the wrong approach and attitude and then get frustrated when they find the streets here aren't paved with sex.
On the flip side of that you have the women and couples who don't use filters and other tools the site provides to minimise the traffic to their inboxes and get just as frustrated because of the crap messages they receive and so the vicious circle continues, and will continue to continue as long as people see the site incorrectly.
In the meantime there are lots of people of all genders and categories who do "get" the site, who do have the right attitude, approach and expectations who just go quietly about their Fab business enjoying the site for what it is - yeah they probably have to put up with some crap and knock backs still, but they accept it as an unfortunate bi-product of the site and either ignore it, or take steps to minimise it.
And I'm convinced that amongst those that do "get" it that the number imbalance is a lot more level too |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"There is no magic answer to this one unfortunately - fact of the matter is there are a disproportionate number of single men compared to single ladies and couples (the figure is actually about 15:1 not 100:1 as mentioned earlier) and the vast majority of those men simply don't "get" the site and how it works, or adapt their approach when they find they're not getting anywhere - they sign up with hopes and expectations incorrectly set, adopt the wrong approach and attitude and then get frustrated when they find the streets here aren't paved with sex.
On the flip side of that you have the women and couples who don't use filters and other tools the site provides to minimise the traffic to their inboxes and get just as frustrated because of the crap messages they receive and so the vicious circle continues, and will continue to continue as long as people see the site incorrectly.
In the meantime there are lots of people of all genders and categories who do "get" the site, who do have the right attitude, approach and expectations who just go quietly about their Fab business enjoying the site for what it is - yeah they probably have to put up with some crap and knock backs still, but they accept it as an unfortunate bi-product of the site and either ignore it, or take steps to minimise it.
And I'm convinced that amongst those that do "get" it that the number imbalance is a lot more level too "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And in an ideal world I would reply to every single message and politely reply to/decline the ones I wasn’t interested in, and I did try to do that at first but there’s just too many..."
if every women did reply to all there message they would awake for hole week with out sleep which is why they pick who they want to talk that why most men here get nasty i think
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They ruin it for the genuine ones making it difficult.
I'm surprised more females haven't got single guys blocked from some of the things I've heard
It's such a shame as everyone is on here to enjoy the lifestyle but a few people ruin it for everyone! |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"They ruin it for the genuine ones making it difficult.
I'm surprised more females haven't got single guys blocked from some of the things I've heard
It's such a shame as everyone is on here to enjoy the lifestyle but a few people ruin it for everyone!"
As I said further up - the only people they ruin it for is themselves - if you're a decent and genuine guy, who has the right attitude, expectations and approach coupled with a half decent profile there's no guarantees of course but there's also no reason you shouldn't enjoy a positive experience of the site - and certainly no other guys will be spoiling it for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not buying it folks. Here's why. Last year I was poorly for days and out of action. I spend my time on fab obviously NOT looking for hookups but just being friendly.
By the end of the 8 days I had received over 500 messages from single women and couples 13 of whom became my friends. In that time just about every single person replied to my unsolicited messages.
Any guy who takes the right approach can make the world his oyster on fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They ruin it for the genuine ones making it difficult.
I'm surprised more females haven't got single guys blocked from some of the things I've heard
It's such a shame as everyone is on here to enjoy the lifestyle but a few people ruin it for everyone!
As I said further up - the only people they ruin it for is themselves - if you're a decent and genuine guy, who has the right attitude, expectations and approach coupled with a half decent profile there's no guarantees of course but there's also no reason you shouldn't enjoy a positive experience of the site - and certainly no other guys will be spoiling it for you "
As always the voice of reason. If I could collect all your postings over the years and make a book out of them it would be a best seller. You always hit the nail right on the head.
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"Getting any single female to message back is a miracle lol
Its not actually if you have a decent profile and pics and/or send a decent message with pics attached. I think profile pic is key as its what they first see in their inbox and will either make you stand out for the right or wrong reasons !"
Yes this! Totally agree with all above points as a single female x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’ve tried most approaches from polite to quirky and 99% of messages get ignored
I’ve only lashed out a couple of times through sheer frustration and regretted it when I did it. Don’t do it any more.
But the rejection does wear you out and you get to the point where it’s hardly worth bothering I’m afraid.
In the same club Bud
While I'd never 'lash out' I can understand it to a degree. Single guys ARE predominantly ignored for sure. A lot of women (and some couples) rightly complain about the kind of approaches they get, but there is a vicious circle that exists due to messages from otherwise decent men getting lost in the numbers of messages received. My suspicion is that in the end the vast majority of decent single men will give up and leave Fab, which many couples in particular would be happy with, based on the way a lot of single men are treated in clubs. No doubt Fab and the scene will survive and thrive should that happen, but those self-same folks will then complain that they can no longer get into clubs for free, or anywhere near as cheaply, with some clubs no longer able to survive without the money the single guys bring in. To balance this out its clear a lot of single men have a poor approach and a lack of respect in their advances, online and in the clubs themselves. For me the whole scene would be a sad place if any group were excluded, but we all have to play a positive part in making it work. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
sounds about right |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not buying it folks. Here's why. Last year I was poorly for days and out of action. I spend my time on fab obviously NOT looking for hookups but just being friendly.
By the end of the 8 days I had received over 500 messages from single women and couples 13 of whom became my friends. In that time just about every single person replied to my unsolicited messages.
Any guy who takes the right approach can make the world his oyster on fab. "
That’s because you dangle the possibility of your girlfriend being part of things. You’re not a single male per se |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because the majority or single men on here are only interested in their own agenda and not sharing the experiences and thrills of others.
They send their own messages and their own detail, paying zero attention to the person they are actually trying to engage.
That being said, some of us here do send messages that reflect what's written in a profile, send face pics if a profile requests it, and pay compliments to other users, very very rarely though do we even get an acknowledgement or reply.
Thankfully I have been lucky with fab, I'm not ugly, nor am I disrespectful so the meets flow nicely for me. Men just need to realise they're the easy licking on here and because.of their alpha male instinct, don't like that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because the majority or single men on here are only interested in their own agenda and not sharing the experiences and thrills of others.
They send their own messages and their own detail, paying zero attention to the person they are actually trying to engage.
That being said, some of us here do send messages that reflect what's written in a profile, send face pics if a profile requests it, and pay compliments to other users, very very rarely though do we even get an acknowledgement or reply.
Thankfully I have been lucky with fab, I'm not ugly, nor am I disrespectful so the meets flow nicely for me. Men just need to realise they're the easy licking on here and because.of their alpha male instinct, don't like that. |
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"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab "
I bet it was from the same single female I got one from this morning too! Ffs! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm not buying it folks. Here's why. Last year I was poorly for days and out of action. I spend my time on fab obviously NOT looking for hookups but just being friendly.
By the end of the 8 days I had received over 500 messages from single women and couples 13 of whom became my friends. In that time just about every single person replied to my unsolicited messages.
Any guy who takes the right approach can make the world his oyster on fab.
That’s because you dangle the possibility of your girlfriend being part of things. You’re not a single male per se "
It's a fair assumption but being "attached" actually makes it harder to meet single straight women.
From those messages I formed an amazing friendship with a single straight female and shared a number of memorable weekends with her. No dangling involved.
Where you are correct is that because I have a swinging girlfriend I am not desperate. I do not pursue women for sex, I persue them for friendship. Sex happens as a natural course of events. This is why I advise single men to take sex off the table when first approaching women. They are missing out on so much by trying to skip the gettoknowyou phase. If a woman likes you as a person and finds you attractive wild horses won't stop her wanting you sexually. |
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"I’ve tried most approaches from polite to quirky and 99% of messages get ignored
I’ve only lashed out a couple of times through sheer frustration and regretted it when I did it. Don’t do it any more.
But the rejection does wear you out and you get to the point where it’s hardly worth bothering I’m afraid.
In the same club Bud
While I'd never 'lash out' I can understand it to a degree. Single guys ARE predominantly ignored for sure. A lot of women (and some couples) rightly complain about the kind of approaches they get, but there is a vicious circle that exists due to messages from otherwise decent men getting lost in the numbers of messages received. My suspicion is that in the end the vast majority of decent single men will give up and leave Fab, which many couples in particular would be happy with, based on the way a lot of single men are treated in clubs. No doubt Fab and the scene will survive and thrive should that happen, but those self-same folks will then complain that they can no longer get into clubs for free, or anywhere near as cheaply, with some clubs no longer able to survive without the money the single guys bring in. To balance this out its clear a lot of single men have a poor approach and a lack of respect in their advances, online and in the clubs themselves. For me the whole scene would be a sad place if any group were excluded, but we all have to play a positive part in making it work. "
Having received a very 'negative' private message from a single female on here this morning, can I please clarify (if its needed) that my statement above from last night does NOT in ANY WAY CONDONE being abusive (ironic based on the message I got!). I was commenting that I can understand the frustration of the poster who's comment I replied to at the time - NOT agreeing with him having stated he'd potentially crossed the line having received little, or negative responses. Abuse is Abuse, no matter where it comes from and has no part in society EVER. Understanding frustration is not condoning something more sinister. On a more positive note while I've not had a great deal of success via messaging (despite making what I think is a genuine effort to engage on a human level) my success is almost 100%down to attending socials and getting myself seen for who I am. Socials cost very little and in my experience you're given an opportunity to be a genuine, nice person. My verifications confirm this as almost all have come via friendships made at socials. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?"
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve been away from fab for the last 14 months or so, exploring something that didn’t really go anywhere, but he did speak to me respectfully and courteously.
I’m back on here now, and things must have changed from a year ago- it’s all gone to dick pics and WhatsApp wanking vids, literally out of the blue. The guy I was with didn’t really do that, so now I’m being assaulted on what feels like all sides, which makes me miss him and how he spoke to me even more, which is making it harder for me to sift through the dick pics, and move on... so I’m a bit stuck!
Men! Please stop sending me pictures of your willy! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They ruin it for the genuine ones making it difficult.
I'm surprised more females haven't got single guys blocked from some of the things I've heard
It's such a shame as everyone is on here to enjoy the lifestyle but a few people ruin it for everyone!
As I said further up - the only people they ruin it for is themselves - if you're a decent and genuine guy, who has the right attitude, expectations and approach coupled with a half decent profile there's no guarantees of course but there's also no reason you shouldn't enjoy a positive experience of the site - and certainly no other guys will be spoiling it for you "
Saves me from posting that! Thanks G as always great post. I will just add even the negative ones trying to put you down for whatever reasons and lord knows they will keep trying... it won't work. This is a great thread and hopefully encourage more Fabbers to continue their journey because there is plenty of opportunity for "fun" on here with like minded people connecting all the time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’ve been away from fab for the last 14 months or so, exploring something that didn’t really go anywhere, but he did speak to me respectfully and courteously.
I’m back on here now, and things must have changed from a year ago- it’s all gone to dick pics and WhatsApp wanking vids, literally out of the blue. The guy I was with didn’t really do that, so now I’m being assaulted on what feels like all sides, which makes me miss him and how he spoke to me even more, which is making it harder for me to sift through the dick pics, and move on... so I’m a bit stuck!
Men! Please stop sending me pictures of your willy! "
It's good to have you back xxx
Missed ya! |
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"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
"
Truth is most of it is down to the numbers game. It's amazing how many "Fancy a fuck" messages seem to get read, yet a lot of guys who make an effort seem to have the vast majority they send stay unread. I can't imagine it's ever personal (or at least rarely), but with females being bombarded daily it will always be so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
Truth is most of it is down to the numbers game. It's amazing how many "Fancy a fuck" messages seem to get read, yet a lot of guys who make an effort seem to have the vast majority they send stay unread. I can't imagine it's ever personal (or at least rarely), but with females being bombarded daily it will always be so. "
sometimes i open messages, not worth a reply so press delete.
95% of my messages are opened. and i would say out of the 95% about 30% replied to
and yes i woke up to over 100 messages this morning, but i have been about this week |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
Truth is most of it is down to the numbers game. It's amazing how many "Fancy a fuck" messages seem to get read, yet a lot of guys who make an effort seem to have the vast majority they send stay unread. I can't imagine it's ever personal (or at least rarely), but with females being bombarded daily it will always be so. "
I'm surprised to hear this. Based on the number of women who post on this forum that they are sick and tired of FAF messages I would have thought the opposite to be true.
So if you are one of 100 men who sends a FAF message to a fab lady, what makes her choose you? |
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I've never sent one like that, was just observing that the ladies who post on the forums often say they get a lot of those kind of messages, so I'm assuming they're being read? The vast majority I send, which are never one-liners, are always respectful and conversational, never 'cut and paste', show an interest in the individual as a person and make reference to their profile, finally signing off with several (face) photos don't appear to get read for the most part. Maybe I'm just damned ugly! It can't be just bad luck all the time? |
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"Rejection or being ignored (repeatedly) can be quite destructive to human beings - particularly to the male ego
Experience enough of it, and it manifests into feeling of worthlessness. Their response to this is to try feel like they have some control over the situation - often resulting in them lashing out and telling the woman that she is just a dumb slut anyway.
Not justifying it - but I believe this is generally the case. Woman can do this too (but they generally experience less rejections)."
Wouldn't throw you out of bed.... yummy  |
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"I've never sent one like that, was just observing that the ladies who post on the forums often say they get a lot of those kind of messages, so I'm assuming they're being read? The vast majority I send, which are never one-liners, are always respectful and conversational, never 'cut and paste', show an interest in the individual as a person and make reference to their profile, finally signing off with several (face) photos don't appear to get read for the most part. Maybe I'm just damned ugly! It can't be just bad luck all the time? "
Well shame your down south you look nice...and polite too a bonus..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab "
Got another message from the same person - can’t seem to block them as they’re hidden.
I regard it as cyber bullying |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've never sent one like that, was just observing that the ladies who post on the forums often say they get a lot of those kind of messages, so I'm assuming they're being read? The vast majority I send, which are never one-liners, are always respectful and conversational, never 'cut and paste', show an interest in the individual as a person and make reference to their profile, finally signing off with several (face) photos don't appear to get read for the most part. Maybe I'm just damned ugly! It can't be just bad luck all the time? "
A message being read and a message being responded to are two different things.
As I am fond of saying, a penis doesn't really offer a woman anything she can't get from a brown packaged box that arrives in the post, only requires recharging and fits snugly in her bedside drawer. No matter how big your cock is or how good your tongue is you've got to offer more than physical stimulation for it to be worth the trouble of shaving her legs.
It begs the question; if 90% of women could walk into a bar and go home with a guy, why are they on fab? Perhaps those messages give women the opportunity to get to know you first and many guys just blow that opportunity up with a FAF message.
This comes from four yeas of NOT trying to get laid and having more fun than the guys who are hell bent on getting laid. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab
Got another message from the same person - can’t seem to block them as they’re hidden.
I regard it as cyber bullying "
You can still block if they're hidden - at the top right of the page where it says they are hidden is a drop down menu where one of the options is "Block User"
You can also report them from there if they are being truly abusive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab
Got another message from the same person - can’t seem to block them as they’re hidden.
I regard it as cyber bullying "
If the messages are abusive I would suggest reporting them to admin.
If you delete them without reading them then the person sending them will stop wasting their time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab
Got another message from the same person - can’t seem to block them as they’re hidden.
I regard it as cyber bullying
If the messages are abusive I would suggest reporting them to admin.
If you delete them without reading them then the person sending them will stop wasting their time."
Reported now / thanks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab
Got another message from the same person - can’t seem to block them as they’re hidden.
I regard it as cyber bullying
You can still block if they're hidden - at the top right of the page where it says they are hidden is a drop down menu where one of the options is "Block User"
You can also report them from there if they are being truly abusive."
Recommended reading. The subtle art of not giving af*ck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I got a private message this morning asking me why I’d not deleted my profile and having a go at me because I admitted to reacting poorly to rejection.
Welcome to the world of the single male on Fab
Got another message from the same person - can’t seem to block them as they’re hidden.
I regard it as cyber bullying "
U can block. The message gives you the option too |
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By *opite_x OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
This thread was genuinely not about bashing single males at all, and I know abuse can come from both sides and neither is acceptable.
I understand about filters and blocking but because I don’t really have a type at all, it varies all the time filters don’t seem to work for me because they would have to be very loose anyway!
I just didn’t want people to think all single women are rude when they don’t reply to messages, I’ve replied to about 50 messages since I started this thread and I’ve now got over 1300+ unread messages in my inbox. I just don’t have the time to sit down and go through every one, it feels like a full time job!
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"This thread was genuinely not about bashing single males at all, and I know abuse can come from both sides and neither is acceptable.
I understand about filters and blocking but because I don’t really have a type at all, it varies all the time filters don’t seem to work for me because they would have to be very loose anyway!
I just didn’t want people to think all single women are rude when they don’t reply to messages, I’ve replied to about 50 messages since I started this thread and I’ve now got over 1300+ unread messages in my inbox. I just don’t have the time to sit down and go through every one, it feels like a full time job!
"
You need a PA!
I actually have one but I can’t lend her to go through your messages as the content would probably mean I’d get in trouble for getting her to do that lol |
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By *opite_x OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"You need a PA!
I actually have one but I can’t lend her to go through your messages as the content would probably mean I’d get in trouble for getting her to do that lol"
Haha a fab PA! I wonder where I could advertise for one or those |
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It's strange trying to understand some people. The 'Hi' messages aren't the only elements of where it's like trying to extract teeth.
I get a lot of messages where there could be a seemingly endless exchange of 3 or 4 word messages from single guys - and this despite sending them detailed messages, including some questions.
Ultimately the majority of single men here don't use the forum and don't get to learn how they're unlikely to get better levels of success. They probably become the UNLOS types, or just dormant accounts, once they fail to get what they thought they could get - the tons of near unlimited sex, from their minimal effort approaches. |
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"You need a PA!
I actually have one but I can’t lend her to go through your messages as the content would probably mean I’d get in trouble for getting her to do that lol
Haha a fab PA! I wonder where I could advertise for one or those "
You’d need a sub or cuck with secretarial experience lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This thread was genuinely not about bashing single males at all, and I know abuse can come from both sides and neither is acceptable.
I understand about filters and blocking but because I don’t really have a type at all, it varies all the time filters don’t seem to work for me because they would have to be very loose anyway!
I just didn’t want people to think all single women are rude when they don’t reply to messages, I’ve replied to about 50 messages since I started this thread and I’ve now got over 1300+ unread messages in my inbox. I just don’t have the time to sit down and go through every one, it feels like a full time job!
You need a PA!
I actually have one but I can’t lend her to go through your messages as the content would probably mean I’d get in trouble for getting her to do that lol"
Filters!
Saw a profile the other day where there age filter was 30 to 31. I.e. Don't call me. I'll call you.
Fair play. |
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"This thread was genuinely not about bashing single males at all, and I know abuse can come from both sides and neither is acceptable.
I understand about filters and blocking but because I don’t really have a type at all, it varies all the time filters don’t seem to work for me because they would have to be very loose anyway!
I just didn’t want people to think all single women are rude when they don’t reply to messages, I’ve replied to about 50 messages since I started this thread and I’ve now got over 1300+ unread messages in my inbox. I just don’t have the time to sit down and go through every one, it feels like a full time job!
"
Totally understandable! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's strange trying to understand some people. The 'Hi' messages aren't the only elements of where it's like trying to extract teeth.
I get a lot of messages where there could be a seemingly endless exchange of 3 or 4 word messages from single guys - and this despite sending them detailed messages, including some questions.
Ultimately the majority of single men here don't use the forum and don't get to learn how they're unlikely to get better levels of success. They probably become the UNLOS types, or just dormant accounts, once they fail to get what they thought they could get - the tons of near unlimited sex, from their minimal effort approaches."
Every now and again I come across a banner on website saying words to the effect of "Thousands of horny desperate women seeking sex. Just message them and they will fuck you". They portray the suggestion that there is a myriad of women who would say "OMG a willing penis!!! My prayers have been answered!!!"
Sadly the male brain stops working once our blood has drained to the lower regions. We know better but don't want to believe it. |
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We can only speak from a lot of club experience, and it takes all sorts, but some single guys.... honestly..... just standing there wanging your cock out is guaranteed to go badly with Mrs and most of the people we play with, and the polite ask first guys will often get a little thrill. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's strange trying to understand some people. The 'Hi' messages aren't the only elements of where it's like trying to extract teeth.
I get a lot of messages where there could be a seemingly endless exchange of 3 or 4 word messages from single guys - and this despite sending them detailed messages, including some questions.
Ultimately the majority of single men here don't use the forum and don't get to learn how they're unlikely to get better levels of success. They probably become the UNLOS types, or just dormant accounts, once they fail to get what they thought they could get - the tons of near unlimited sex, from their minimal effort approaches.
Every now and again I come across a banner on website saying words to the effect of "Thousands of horny desperate women seeking sex. Just message them and they will fuck you". They portray the suggestion that there is a myriad of women who would say "OMG a willing penis!!! My prayers have been answered!!!"
Sadly the male brain stops working once our blood has drained to the lower regions. We know better but don't want to believe it."
I think that's exactly how most men view this website. |
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"It's strange trying to understand some people. The 'Hi' messages aren't the only elements of where it's like trying to extract teeth.
I get a lot of messages where there could be a seemingly endless exchange of 3 or 4 word messages from single guys - and this despite sending them detailed messages, including some questions.
Ultimately the majority of single men here don't use the forum and don't get to learn how they're unlikely to get better levels of success. They probably become the UNLOS types, or just dormant accounts, once they fail to get what they thought they could get - the tons of near unlimited sex, from their minimal effort approaches.
Every now and again I come across a banner on website saying words to the effect of "Thousands of horny desperate women seeking sex. Just message them and they will fuck you". They portray the suggestion that there is a myriad of women who would say "OMG a willing penis!!! My prayers have been answered!!!"
Sadly the male brain stops working once our blood has drained to the lower regions. We know better but don't want to believe it.
I think that's exactly how most men view this website. "
Disappointing to think that's the case, but female friends confirm it's the case with a lot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
I myself am struggling on this site I’m not boring with the messages either but understand woman get loads of messages off men and woman and will not have the time to go through them all. I don’t understand the men who reply back with outrageous and nasty comments as they have been rejected. I’ve had no luck so far It’s frustrating but I’d never resolve to messaging women back with abuse I just move on but as you said so hard fo is single guys unless you’ve had public verifications etc! Hopefully something comes up! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Have to say any 'lazy' messages which need me to 'entertain' them, block!!!! Says they will be lazy on a meet and bed!"
Not me. No ma'am. I'm famous for cleaning the fridge, mowing the lawn and changing the oil in your car on my way out....
I can't imagine any man lucky enough to share your bed being lazy!!! You're gorgeous!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
It makes talking to women harder after these encounters because they nust expect the same from others and you end up getting one word answers back |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This is were a nice update would help
Only receive messages which have a picture attached
There should also be a limit of how many messages can be sent each hour |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
It makes talking to women harder after these encounters because they nust expect the same from others and you end up getting one word answers back "
Or.....OR.... when you are a complete night in shining armour you seem amazing by comparison and it's like goodcopbadcop!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
It makes talking to women harder after these encounters because they nust expect the same from others and you end up getting one word answers back
Or.....OR.... when you are a complete night in shining armour you seem amazing by comparison and it's like goodcopbadcop!!!"
Suppose you got to take the rough with the smooth |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"This is were a nice update would help
Only receive messages which have a picture attached
There should also be a limit of how many messages can be sent each hour"
Not sure how the first suggestion would help to be honest - some guys would just see it as a reason to attach a cock pic.
As for the second suggestion that would penalise those that are having ongoing conversations or who are sending perfectly reasonable messages and using the site in the right way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is were a nice update would help
Only receive messages which have a picture attached
There should also be a limit of how many messages can be sent each hour
Not sure how the first suggestion would help to be honest - some guys would just see it as a reason to attach a cock pic.
As for the second suggestion that would penalise those that are having ongoing conversations or who are sending perfectly reasonable messages and using the site in the right way."
Agree a good conversation could then be stopped as you have hit the total messages your allowed to send in the hour |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Standard behaviour for most sadly. I find that the guys who act this way are usually unverified (and likely to stay that way)
Thankfully there are some respectful, polite guys who can hold a decent conversation.
X
Yeah! I mean I was on here a few years ago and I had some really good meets, but this time around I’ve been on here just over a week and I’ve got nearly a thousand unread mails in my inbox... it’s hard to sort through all the junk!
Therein lies the problem - how do you find the ones you might want to meet in that 1000 without reading them - which no sane person would want to do!
Well I’m trying to make a dent... "
I filter by meet criteria. Mine is distance, age, and profile. In that order. Any that don't meet that now get deleted. I only wish we had a distance filter, it would make life so much easier to set a radius. I've no interest in meeting people living 100s of miles away, but even using filters they can still message me. |
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"Block men and search for suitable guys yourself maybe? My club buddy did that very successfully on here for years.
Agree, best possible way.
We do that as a couple as well as we dont want to be pestered by bunch of dickheads. Yet, we enjoy an mmf every now and then. It's best to find suitable guys yourself.
She said she was way more successful doing it that way. Guys she messaged first generally wouldn't let her down or go queit and were the ones who had decent profiles who made an effort so were more likely to be genuine and up for meeting. "
This is by far the best advice on this thread...! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Block men and search for suitable guys yourself maybe? My club buddy did that very successfully on here for years.
Agree, best possible way.
We do that as a couple as well as we dont want to be pestered by bunch of dickheads. Yet, we enjoy an mmf every now and then. It's best to find suitable guys yourself.
She said she was way more successful doing it that way. Guys she messaged first generally wouldn't let her down or go queit and were the ones who had decent profiles who made an effort so were more likely to be genuine and up for meeting.
This is by far the best advice on this thread...! "
Yea thats good advice. Females should search out guys more using rhe search facility rather than trawling through 100's of messages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Block men and search for suitable guys yourself maybe? My club buddy did that very successfully on here for years.
Agree, best possible way.
We do that as a couple as well as we dont want to be pestered by bunch of dickheads. Yet, we enjoy an mmf every now and then. It's best to find suitable guys yourself.
She said she was way more successful doing it that way. Guys she messaged first generally wouldn't let her down or go queit and were the ones who had decent profiles who made an effort so were more likely to be genuine and up for meeting.
This is by far the best advice on this thread...! "
That’s a good idea |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"So tell me.
If a couple blocks single men totally, then searches one can he reply to the couple?
Thought of you blocked single men that would stop them mailing couples"
Someone mailing you bypasses any filters that are in place or put in place in future - it's another reason some people don't respond to messages they receive that are not of interest to them |
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By *osie xWoman
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
Truth is most of it is down to the numbers game. It's amazing how many "Fancy a fuck" messages seem to get read, yet a lot of guys who make an effort seem to have the vast majority they send stay unread. I can't imagine it's ever personal (or at least rarely), but with females being bombarded daily it will always be so. "
I’m a fat old minger and even I get bombarded with messages so I imagine the hotties are pulling their hair out. Thing is it does become Groundhog Day
Hi how are you?
Good thanks how are you?
Good thanks, how’s fab working for you?
Not bad, what about you?
That repeated 20 times a day?? So yes, the ‘fancy a fuck’ message gets the attention because even though you know straight away he’s a dick and you’ll never meet him it’s a difference.
I’m not saying become a dick but most of us can be laughed into bed so make it quirky and not so serious. Someone stated a ratio of 1000:1, it’s not like if you fail a few times with a different approach you have no other options |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
There's no excuse for guys being abusive - just because a woman's on a swinging site doesn't mean they have to have sex with anyone who messages them.
For me the problem is when a lady has a profile with attractive pictures but nothing much written in their profile, because I don't like 'lines' or generic openers, I like to have something to respond to that's specific to that person, and a blank profile makes it difficult to be anything other than generic. That said I'm sure there are plenty of guys who are much better at online flirting than me who manage perfectly well so I probably just need to up my game! |
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"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
Truth is most of it is down to the numbers game. It's amazing how many "Fancy a fuck" messages seem to get read, yet a lot of guys who make an effort seem to have the vast majority they send stay unread. I can't imagine it's ever personal (or at least rarely), but with females being bombarded daily it will always be so.
I’m a fat old minger and even I get bombarded with messages so I imagine the hotties are pulling their hair out. Thing is it does become Groundhog Day
Hi how are you?
Good thanks how are you?
Good thanks, how’s fab working for you?
Not bad, what about you?
That repeated 20 times a day?? So yes, the ‘fancy a fuck’ message gets the attention because even though you know straight away he’s a dick and you’ll never meet him it’s a difference.
I’m not saying become a dick but most of us can be laughed into bed so make it quirky and not so serious. Someone stated a ratio of 1000:1, it’s not like if you fail a few times with a different approach you have no other options "
Think that sums up what my female friends have said to me nicely! Even as an average bloke (i.e. Not George Clooney) it should be blatantly obvious zero effort will get zero response. (Shakes head). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's not always easy to start a conversation when sending a message and I am not English teacher. But I can manage more then just hi..then it still gets ignored anyway. "
It's your name. You need to change your fab name to let women know that you're one of the only 10 guys in the world who provide oral sex. Try PussyLicker69, or MysticalTongue or something subtle like that. Seriously. You just need to send a message saying "Hi" and within minutes their car is in your driveway. Don't even know how they get your address.... but hey if you go down they'll find a way.
Cummon ladies back me up on this! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi"
"Hi"
(No response)....
....then... a week later....
"Hi"
"Hi"
(No response)
Two days later....
"Hi"
"With your conversation skills have you ever thought of getting your own talk show?"
"Wot do u meen?"
*block* |
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"It's not always easy to start a conversation when sending a message and I am not English teacher. But I can manage more then just hi..then it still gets ignored anyway.
It's your name. You need to change your fab name to let women know that you're one of the only 10 guys in the world who provide oral sex. Try PussyLicker69, or MysticalTongue or something subtle like that. Seriously. You just need to send a message saying "Hi" and within minutes their car is in your driveway. Don't even know how they get your address.... but hey if you go down they'll find a way.
Cummon ladies back me up on this!"
Lol funny I like the MysticalTongue or how about the magicalmystorypussytour...just rolls off the tongue don't it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
That's what separates men from wannabe men. It's an effective filter.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
Unfortunately it’s guys like some of the ones that you have experienced along with some of the idiot time wasters on here that make it extra hard for us genuine ones, that do want to meet and are prepared to do some of the ground work.
It’s hard sorting the chaff from the wheat.
Also, unfortunately Fab is a cross section and reflection of society..... which is scary lol
C x
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's not always easy to start a conversation when sending a message and I am not English teacher. But I can manage more then just hi..then it still gets ignored anyway.
It's your name. You need to change your fab name to let women know that you're one of the only 10 guys in the world who provide oral sex. Try PussyLicker69, or MysticalTongue or something subtle like that. Seriously. You just need to send a message saying "Hi" and within minutes their car is in your driveway. Don't even know how they get your address.... but hey if you go down they'll find a way.
Cummon ladies back me up on this!
Lol funny I like the MysticalTongue or how about the magicalmystorypussytour...just rolls off the tongue don't it "
Yes yes yes.... sounds like a Beatles song.... the ladies will get earworm and the only cure will to have sex with you! I think you've hit on something there!
Also gotta say dude... you need to change your profile pic to a cock pic (doesn't have be yours). I mean how do you expect women to just know you have a penis? They're not psychic. In the age of GOT where most men are eunuchs you've gotta prove you've got the equipment. Also have a collage of various angle shots, sticky Skyremote shot, deodorant can shot, beer bottle shot, trick with the hand that makes a 3 inch penis look like 8 inches shot. Can't go wrong. |
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"It's not always easy to start a conversation when sending a message and I am not English teacher. But I can manage more then just hi..then it still gets ignored anyway.
It's your name. You need to change your fab name to let women know that you're one of the only 10 guys in the world who provide oral sex. Try PussyLicker69, or MysticalTongue or something subtle like that. Seriously. You just need to send a message saying "Hi" and within minutes their car is in your driveway. Don't even know how they get your address.... but hey if you go down they'll find a way.
Cummon ladies back me up on this!
Lol funny I like the MysticalTongue or how about the magicalmystorypussytour...just rolls off the tongue don't it
Yes yes yes.... sounds like a Beatles song.... the ladies will get earworm and the only cure will to have sex with you! I think you've hit on something there!
Also gotta say dude... you need to change your profile pic to a cock pic (doesn't have be yours). I mean how do you expect women to just know you have a penis? They're not psychic. In the age of GOT where most men are eunuchs you've gotta prove you've got the equipment. Also have a collage of various angle shots, sticky Skyremote shot, deodorant can shot, beer bottle shot, trick with the hand that makes a 3 inch penis look like 8 inches shot. Can't go wrong."
Yer I will change it to that name and I will either use a photo of John Holmes cock or a very well hung black guy, that should do the trick. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
""Hi"
"Hi"
(No response)....
....then... a week later....
"Hi"
"Hi"
(No response)
Two days later....
"Hi"
"With your conversation skills have you ever thought of getting your own talk show?"
"Wot do u meen?"
"
Not blocked people but i can be scarcastic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
""Hi"
"Hi"
(No response)....
....then... a week later....
"Hi"
"Hi"
(No response)
Two days later....
"Hi"
"With your conversation skills have you ever thought of getting your own talk show?"
"Wot do u meen?"
Not blocked people but i can be scarcastic "
I can take so much but then these people make me start to lose my faith in mankind.
Not to worry. There's always a willing brain donor or two to replace him.
Actually the great thing about people skills is they can be worked on. Penis size you're pretty much stuck with, follicular challenges can be daunting.... but human interaction is something you can watch and learn. Provided the willingness to learn exists which is probably the caveat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Basically women should forget about preferences and standards and just fuck everyone that asks! This is the only solution! . Come on then
Best offer I've had all year! "
Oooo ( |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
Some guys are just turds.. but at least it’s a quick indicator of their turdiness, just block them, it will slightly help you narrow down the already vast head count of men. |
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By *osie xWoman
over a year ago
wolverhampton |
"So what's so unattractive about single Males and why isit so hard for us?
as some treat people like a piece of meat.
and with messages like "WUU2" or "Hi" or "fancy a fuck"
or fake photos or photos of bareback sex with different people ( all ex's apparently)
Truth is most of it is down to the numbers game. It's amazing how many "Fancy a fuck" messages seem to get read, yet a lot of guys who make an effort seem to have the vast majority they send stay unread. I can't imagine it's ever personal (or at least rarely), but with females being bombarded daily it will always be so.
I’m a fat old minger and even I get bombarded with messages so I imagine the hotties are pulling their hair out. Thing is it does become Groundhog Day
Hi how are you?
Good thanks how are you?
Good thanks, how’s fab working for you?
Not bad, what about you?
That repeated 20 times a day?? So yes, the ‘fancy a fuck’ message gets the attention because even though you know straight away he’s a dick and you’ll never meet him it’s a difference.
I’m not saying become a dick but most of us can be laughed into bed so make it quirky and not so serious. Someone stated a ratio of 1000:1, it’s not like if you fail a few times with a different approach you have no other options
Think that sums up what my female friends have said to me nicely! Even as an average bloke (i.e. Not George Clooney) it should be blatantly obvious zero effort will get zero response. (Shakes head). "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
Hi. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
Hi."
%%:#@@?! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
Oh I know that feeling
Haha we’re probably getting the same guys too!"
Add me to list too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
we had a very nasty message this morning from a guy who was travelling home and wanted to meet on his way, cause I said no thank you, the abuse that followed was epic, blocked and reported, i just give up now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They’re definitely my main target audience for being on here, but why do they make it so hard! I’m not expecting great things or trying to make them jump through hoops because I understand it can be a bit shit on here for them... but when they send me a ‘Hi’ and nothing else and then follow with a barrage of abuse 5 minutes later when I haven’t replied
"
Some of us just get filtered out too. |
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It does feel harder to find single men who match what you're looking for. Lots of messages but few of them that intrigue and the ones that start off well often seem to either put me off along the way or disappear.
I've wondered if it's me being too picky but I've chatted to others who say similar. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"It does feel harder to find single men who match what you're looking for. Lots of messages but few of them that intrigue and the ones that start off well often seem to either put me off along the way or disappear.
I've wondered if it's me being too picky but I've chatted to others who say similar. "
But that's just natural behaviour in any "relationship" type scenario, whether it be making friends at work, looking for a lifelong partner or looking for a meet on here.
Regardless of the ultimate aim, there will always be people who come into our lives that we either don't warm to immediately, or who seem interesting initially but over time things fizzle out or the dynamic changes, or who we make an instant connection with that just grows, and many other variants in between.
And this place is no different and that, I think, is what a lot of people lose sight of - and all the usual rules of "relationship" engagement go out the window.
And before anyone jumps on my use of the word "relationship" I'm using it in the broadest sense, not the one that immediately comes to mind - any coming together of two (or more) people is a relationship of sorts no matter how fleeting that coming together may be. |
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