FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > where to find the single bi fems
where to find the single bi fems
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we do very well from the comfort of our own front room thanks  | |||
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"no they are the sort of girls that you meet get know and end up having fun with...and if I bought you a drink I wouldn't demand / expect a fuck because of it, I'd get a fuck first and you'd probably be a bit thirsty after XXX" Well you must be the luckiest guy in Barnstaple then. Go forth and enjoy. | |||
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"If I want to meet people,girls, or couples I don't just use this site, I go out socialise and meet people. And yes I do find single bi-fems out and about,quite often. " And thats fine for you, really it is. But I don't like to go out clubbing. York is a no go zone for the over 30s at the weekend. I don't particularly want to go and wrestle with d*unk guys just to meet a couple who MAY both find me attractive, and who will probably be d*unk. On here, I can at least browse and chat to sober people, without raising my voice over the ear bleedingly loud music in most pubs and clubs. And the best place of all is a good swinger club. Still doesn't mean I am successful in meeting a nice couple, but at least I can play with some nice men while i'm waiting. You're right about one thing though. Too many people complain there are not enough bi females on here. There are plenty. What they mean is there are not enough bi females that they both like and who like them. | |||
"wow, thats not agressive or assumptive in the slightest is it... there are plenty of single fems on this site, looking and waiting for the right couples and single guys and even other single fems. and your assuming that people actually want to go out to a local non swinging club on a friday or saturday night... i certainly dont.. they are full of d*unk chavs and fights... not my scene thanks... and i very much doubt i would like any of the single fems in that environment that are up for a shag with a couple... " wow thats not assumptive in the slightest either! There are plenty of trendy bars (not chav have outs) around that girls like to spend time in.. many have come onto miss or the other way round. Yes you need to tread carefully, as not all girls are so open minded in vanilla bars, but you can tell which ones are open minded just by talking to them. social skills are required thou. Good post OP! | |||
"Actually, I am on this site looking for couples, but couples aren't looking for me." York is just too far hon xxx  | |||
"Actually, I am on this site looking for couples, but couples aren't looking for me. York is just too far hon xxx "Good job I visit Bristol regularly then.  | |||
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"no Wyrd, seriously what I was trying to say is single bi woman are everywhere, but like anything worth while you have to go and look. I not talking about going out, picking up a girl that is specifically bi and up for sex on that night, although that is more straight forward than most people think. What I mean is if you get out your house, go and meet people you will come across like minded people, and find what you are looking for. If I want to meet people,girls, or couples I don't just use this site, I go out socialise and meet people. And yes I do find single bi-fems out and about,quite often. " And how do u think ppl swung before the internet
i know what u are saying but there is an element of trying to teach your grandma to suck eggs here. i think one of the problem with sites like this is that people see them as the sum total of their swinging experience rather than a useful tool . | |||
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"* whistles to Jem and jiggles her keys seductively* "*turns up her heating and moves closer to the key board* | |||
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"I am only responding to all the people that bitch about not being able to find them that's all. If you know where they are then good for you. My swinging partner and I found them everywhere, we found it more difficult to find good single guys. I knew I was going to get flammed for this. and assumptive, saying everyone out on a Saturday night is a chav, pissed and aggressive is also a bit assumptive, so you kind of undermine your own point there a little a bit. IMHO Bi single girls are everywhere, and if you are not finding them on here, then go out and find them. Just trying to help those that want to know where they are, oh look there are two now walking past my house on the way to the pub....
"On the other hand one should never assume. At 51 yrs old, the last thing on my mind is going up town clubbing and getting pissed, much prefer to have my feet up in front of the tv watching a good film | |||
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" I knew I was going to get flammed for this. " If you knew you were going to get flammed why put it... " and assumptive, saying everyone out on a Saturday night is a chav, pissed and aggressive is also a bit assumptive, so you kind of undermine your own point there a little a bit. " And its not an assumption... its based on experience... i doubt you have ever been out in cambridge on a friday or saturday night so i doubt you will understand the general culture around here... students and chavs make up a significant amount of the population, and they are the people that go out on a friday and saturday night to the clubs.. spill out onto the pavement, puke everywhere, piss on the streets... there are very few nice sensible people who don't get too pissed when they go out on a friday/saturday to a club around here...I gave up on going to clubs around here when i was 18... i much prefer swingers clubs.. people tend to have a bit more decorum about themselves... don't get falling over d*unk and loose all their dignity... | |||
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"I'm a single bi fem (well part of a couple profile but still single!) and I agree with most of the comments. I'd never go to someone's house on my own, only ever meet in public first. It's much safer to sit in the warm on my laptop seeking out someone that seems ok than to go out in the cold. "yup...i meet as a single bu fem, im not desperate enough to leave my nice warm living room to go trawling the clubs | |||
"1 if you dont know where bi girls are and want them, then i do need to teach you to suck eggs. 2 who said go into town ang get pissed, being pissed is not attractive, if your knowledge of going out means getting pissed in Weatherspoons and then to the local dive, you need to re-evaluate what going out means. All cities have great places to go out and meet people, galleries, comedy nights, wine bars, theatres, i said in my post girls are out fulfilling thier lives. I didnt say they were shit faced, playing with themselves waiting to be fucked. Really I just assumed a level of sophistication applied i should have known better. Clueless." 1 I am not looking for bi girls, other people are and if I did want one, I would go to swinging clubs or meet couples 2 All cities don't have galleries and wine bars, Gloucester may have a theatre but its definitely not a meeting place for anyone other than families. And don't forget some of us prefer to keep our sexuality quiet because that's what the kids want 3 Last time I went into town on a Saturday night, the only people sober were me, the police and the security staff And like I said, at 51 its not my thing anymore, far too noisy | |||
"I'm a single bi fem (well part of a couple profile but still single!) and I agree with most of the comments. I'd never go to someone's house on my own, only ever meet in public first. It's much safer to sit in the warm on my laptop seeking out someone that seems ok than to go out in the cold.
yup...i meet as a single bu fem, im not desperate enough to leave my nice warm living room to go trawling the clubs "But that makes us clueless! | |||
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"Really do you couples looking for a bi-fem think you are going to sit at home on your laptop, message them and they are going to get in a car and drive to your house to fulfil all your fantasies? " Happened to us almost exactly like this a couple of weeks ago. Except it was a hotel | |||
they would do so much better if they took time in a few pics, banter, and chats with BOTH rather than just the female, bi fems are not robots! Thank fook im free of that now and stick to the ladies! id never "pull" on a night out in a pub/club though, i like getting to know ladies first, chats, banter, social and anything else i see it as an added bonus , hoping my wit and lovely charm captivates them lol    | |||
". 2) You look good. The gym is past the " i take it by that comment your assuming that all single bi female expect perfection? some may like pie eater | |||
"Really do you couples looking for a bi-fem think you are going to sit at home on your laptop, message them and they are going to get in a car and drive to your house to fulfil all your fantasies? Happened to us almost exactly like this a couple of weeks ago. Except it was a hotel "well i dont drive but i do like fulfilling fantasies | |||
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"Really do you couples looking for a bi-fem think you are going to sit at home on your laptop, message them and they are going to get in a car and drive to your house to fulfil all your fantasies? Happened to us almost exactly like this a couple of weeks ago. Except it was a hotel
well i dont drive but i do like fulfilling fantasies" | |||
"Well I heard there was one seen on the moor near us but they said the same about the beast so unconvinced. " There aren't many, that's for sure. We reckon most couples are much more chilled and realistic about meeting single women than the OP suggests. If it happens, it happens. If not, so what. | |||
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"To be honest, the OP has sort of got a point, but has misunderstood his own perception. 10 – 15 years ago I was a single male, I had kids all week so couldn’t go out at all, but on weekends they went to the In-laws to be looked after, and I went out to get laid. Any Friday or Saturday night I knew which bars and clubs to go into and almost never came home alone, there are plenty of horny women out there if that’s what you want. There were a few occasions when there was more than one woman in my bed the following morning, frequently with amusing guilt and “oh my god I would never do that, when sober!” which I smiled at knowing it was a cover story. As a rule they were slightly tipsy to merry, occasionally d*unk. Some sobered up and rushed off to hubby etc. some wanted to stay for breakfast and some wanted to make a relationship out of it. The last group were the biggest problem as I was not interested in any more than a warm body for the night. The other problem is that sex on first date with vanilla women tends to be pretty dull! Second or third time as knowledge trust etc. builds it gets better but even FB’s often want more. Then I met June, the kids grew up and were independent still at home but adults. Life changed, for very much the better. June was single as she was and is bi, one thing I promised her which made me a better prospect than any previous male partners was that I would never get in the way of that need. But that’s not so easy to do, without a lot of dishonesty and the risk of hurting a lot of vanilla gay / bi women emotionally, which we are not into, there is no real way of keeping my promise in a mainly vanilla world. That’s how we discovered swingers, not on the web but in the swingers club scene. It took the closure of a club we used to frequent to bring us to the net and Fab, looking at the club re_iew pages. The Forums were a spin-off of that and I have to confess that I am now a forum addict. Bottom line is we are not about to go out on the town as a couple and look for single women for J to play with, J is very capable of going out alone and playing, but has no wish to leave women out there expecting more from her than a few hours of sexual pleasure, so whilst on another thread someone asked if there were any “real swingers” on Fab, and in the typical keys in the jar type definition we don’t qualify, the reality is swingers encompass a large variety of people some of which are either looking for the same as us others it fits the fantasy of the moment, which is fine as we only need the moment yet more some FF play for an hour in a club is their foreplay… Whatever the reason thanks to sites like Fab and swingers clubs, we can get what we need out of the situation, without risk, without damage to other people, and with a clear conscious. We have also met some great people who are good friends in or out of the Swingers side of their lives. " Very well put, and it makes perfect sense.  | |||
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"I think I understood my own perception, after all it was my own perception. " Your perception as a single man being applied to couples was the missunderstanging I was refering to. | |||
"I think I understood my own perception, after all it was my own perception. and I would like to add this is not guess work, I am talking from my own considerable experience. and I have had messages saying, yep good post, nice profile, we think the same. it takes all sorts, I was suggesting to those who keep saying they cannot meet Bi single girls, that they are everywhere you just have go and look, and BTW I did say go out meet people and don't make it a Bi pick up hunt ! It was a post about getting out and about, I think it is a bit more deep than get out on the town get pissed, hunt like a desparado, for a bi girl... and yes I have been out in York and Cambridge, and there are really good places to go out in both. Cambridge no theatre or art ?? I think there might be a university there somewhere.....almost all the comedy you watch on TV made in England comes from Footlights graduates... XXXXXXxx " sorry but im not going out on the pull to the fitzwilliam with my partner... thats just crazy talk... how many times have you as a part of a couple pulled in an art gallery or a theatre.. there is lots to do,,, but nowhere to go out on the pull...not as a couple... its much easier as a single to go out and pull... but couples.. you need to have a single bi fem who is willing to share and be shared... those kind of fems *generally* don't want people approaching them in an art gallery or at the theare.. or even at the cinema. If you have pulled at the theatre as a couple i would like to see proof please... because i really cant see it happening, maybe in Amsterdam... but not in Cambridge | |||
"To be honest, the OP has sort of got a point, but has misunderstood his own perception. 10 – 15 years ago I was a single male, I had kids all week so couldn’t go out at all, but on weekends they went to the In-laws to be looked after, and I went out to get laid. Any Friday or Saturday night I knew which bars and clubs to go into and almost never came home alone, there are plenty of horny women out there if that’s what you want. There were a few occasions when there was more than one woman in my bed the following morning, frequently with amusing guilt and “oh my god I would never do that, when sober!” which I smiled at knowing it was a cover story. As a rule they were slightly tipsy to merry, occasionally d*unk. Some sobered up and rushed off to hubby etc. some wanted to stay for breakfast and some wanted to make a relationship out of it. The last group were the biggest problem as I was not interested in any more than a warm body for the night. The other problem is that sex on first date with vanilla women tends to be pretty dull! Second or third time as knowledge trust etc. builds it gets better but even FB’s often want more. Then I met June, the kids grew up and were independent still at home but adults. Life changed, for very much the better. June was single as she was and is bi, one thing I promised her which made me a better prospect than any previous male partners was that I would never get in the way of that need. But that’s not so easy to do, without a lot of dishonesty and the risk of hurting a lot of vanilla gay / bi women emotionally, which we are not into, there is no real way of keeping my promise in a mainly vanilla world. That’s how we discovered swingers, not on the web but in the swingers club scene. It took the closure of a club we used to frequent to bring us to the net and Fab, looking at the club re_iew pages. The Forums were a spin-off of that and I have to confess that I am now a forum addict. Bottom line is we are not about to go out on the town as a couple and look for single women for J to play with, J is very capable of going out alone and playing, but has no wish to leave women out there expecting more from her than a few hours of sexual pleasure, so whilst on another thread someone asked if there were any “real swingers” on Fab, and in the typical keys in the jar type definition we don’t qualify, the reality is swingers encompass a large variety of people some of which are either looking for the same as us others it fits the fantasy of the moment, which is fine as we only need the moment yet more some FF play for an hour in a club is their foreplay… Whatever the reason thanks to sites like Fab and swingers clubs, we can get what we need out of the situation, without risk, without damage to other people, and with a clear conscious. We have also met some great people who are good friends in or out of the Swingers side of their lives. Very well put, and it makes perfect sense. "+1 | |||
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" The facts the way I see them, from first hand experience. There's loads of single bi-women on here that are a pleasure to know and are a bloody good shag into the bargain. There's also loads out in the vanilla world. Gay bars inparticular have plenty of single bi ladies that attend, as well as usually better music and less pissed up wazzocks. Though straight clubs when picked carefully to eliminate the leery crowd are also fruitful. And yes its easy to attract potential sexual partners all you need to do is walk into a city centre bar on a weekend and you get dozens of offers. Simple, but true. All anyone looking needs to do is select which method they prefer and they will meet women who are warm, friendly, selective and good in bed. " From a 'singles' (which I am not) point of _iew then I'd agree that it would be easy for most guys and girls to pull in a vanilla club. From a 'couples' (which I am) point of _iew, I totally disagree that it would be 'easy' to find a bi girl to invite back to ours for a threesome.... how many straight ladies will we have to annoy/upset with the "excuse me, are you bi and do you fancy us enough for fun?" line for us to hit the 'jackpot'? (and of course, we both have to find her attractive, we are fussy lol) ....or do 'vanilla bi ladies' have enormous flashing beacons strapped to their heads these days? As for gay bars, I have very little experience of going to them ....so I can't comment on how 'easy' it is for MF couple successfully find a bi lady to take home. | |||
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"and yes I have been out in York and Cambridge, and there are really good places to go out in both." I'm not saying there's nowhere in York to go. There are TONS of places in York to go out. But if I've coughed up my (usually over inflated) admission fee, its unlikely I'll be doing anything but watch the show or film, or see the gallery or festival. And I strongly suspect any couple would feel the same. Fab or swingers clubs are my chosen method of finding people and, if you read MY profile, it seems to be working so far. | |||
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"how many straight girls would we piss off ? None, funny the first question was not are you bi will you fuck my girlfriend and me,, i think someone else said social skills are required... We go out talk, mingle, flirt and find out as the night went on, it is a bit more subtle than that, infact it is a lot more fun when it happens like that... Cant wait for the next swingers club night when the bloke suggest the girls put on a show to get everything going.... That is a joke btw....." | |||
"single man misconception ? i have had a couples profile on here for 2 years, " Sorry I was confused by the single man profile, and also the "Definitely single" line in your profile. I fall back on the fact that Swingers are in the minority, and whilst either of us could go out in most towns as singles and "get laid" it would not be swinging as we define it. and Neither of us are interested in going out in Vanilla space as a couple and chatting up singles or couples. But still wish you all the best, and hope you have fun. BTW if we were going short, then we may adopt your or any other tactic.. but we don't need to. | |||
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" I was simply saying that the vanilla scene can still bear delicious fruit...in the same way that this site can. " The only down side i have had from the vanilla scene is every time ive picked a guy up they have expected things to go further and some have actually looked quite hurt when i have said i was only after sex, when your on here you can sometimes forget not everyones after just a shag and some people out there may actually like you and want more from you, i have felt bad on so many occasions because of this that i do tend to avoid sex with people outside of swinging, that way we all know where we stand | |||
"I can certainly see the point that it is trickier for a couple to attract a single bifem in vanilla world than a single guy. However it is certainly a regular occurrance. Gay bars for me are brilliant places to go, not just for meeting ladies, but also because they are generally more liberated, contain less nobheads and do have better beats on offer! I'm not disparaging anyone who prefers using a site to meet and telling them they were doing things the "wrong" way, far from it as I prefer to use both methods, they are both successful and the site offers the wonderful option of knowing more about whether someone will be right for you straight away in terms of personality, intellect, likes/dislikes etc. Plus I wouldn't like to think of myself as anyone prone to preaching lol! I was simply saying that the vanilla scene can still bear delicious fruit...in the same way that this site can. " again the words grandma eggs and suck come to mind
Words like vanilla suggest a false distinction, how do u think we swung before the internet? i think the generally negative reaction to the op's post comes from the fact he misunderstands how and why the majority of couples on here use the site. There is a reason most users are middle aged...we have done the pull at random thing, its fun, it has its place, but when you have kids, jobs, other commitments a swinging site becomes a way to sort out things that in your youth you were more willing to take a chance on.
you are a single man, now i dont want to get into the whole swinger /swingle debate, we love threesomes, but remember these sites grew out of the contact mags , the idea was to put couples together. Many of us use them because we do not have time to go out pulling anymore. | |||
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"how many straight girls would we piss off ? None, funny the first question was not are you bi will you fuck my girlfriend and me,, i think someone else said social skills are required..." You really don't get where I was coming from do you?
We are successful enough in finding single bi fems on FAB to not fall under all the sweeping generalisations that you have tried to brush every MF couple on this site.
You spout on like FAB is a waste of time basically. I'd love to know if anyone takes your advice and finds success in a vanilla club/art gallery etc.
The beauty about using FAB is that you can take your time and make contact with people that interest you, exchange private messages and arrange a meet, see how you get on and take it from there. All chillaxed and free from trying to work out who is bi and sober enough.
A night out in a vanilla club effectively 'hunting' down a bi fem has absolutely zero appeal whatsoever for us. A night of shouting into hubby's ear "DO YOU LIKE THE LOOK OF HER.... DO YOU THINK SHE IS BI, WILL SHE FANCY US?????" is not going to happen in our book.
I don't think either hubby or myself lack 'social skills' tbh. We're successful enough without being told by a single guy how to become 'successful' as an MF couple | |||
"i think the generally negative reaction to the op's post comes from the fact he misunderstands how and why the majority of couples on here use the site." I thought it was because he is being unbelievably condescending myself, but YMMV | |||
"i think the generally negative reaction to the op's post comes from the fact he misunderstands how and why the majority of couples on here use the site. I thought it was because he is being unbelievably condescending myself, but YMMV "oh that too | |||
"how many straight girls would we piss off ? None, funny the first question was not are you bi will you fuck my girlfriend and me,, i think someone else said social skills are required... You really don't get where I was coming from do you?
We are successful enough in finding single bi fems on FAB to not fall under all the sweeping generalisations that you have tried to brush every MF couple on this site.
You spout on like FAB is a waste of time basically. I'd love to know if anyone takes your advice and finds success in a vanilla club/art gallery etc.
The beauty about using FAB is that you can take your time and make contact with people that interest you, exchange private messages and arrange a meet, see how you get on and take it from there. All chillaxed and free from trying to work out who is bi and sober enough.
A night out in a vanilla club effectively 'hunting' down a bi fem has absolutely zero appeal whatsoever for us. A night of shouting into hubby's ear "DO YOU LIKE THE LOOK OF HER.... DO YOU THINK SHE IS BI, WILL SHE FANCY US?????" is not going to happen in our book.
I don't think either hubby or myself lack 'social skills' tbh. We're successful enough without being told by a single guy how to become 'successful' as an MF couple"i am giving up...he either doesnt understand or is flaming, either way i am bored with him | |||
" i am giving up...he either doesnt understand or is flaming, either way i am bored with him "haha yeah does seem a bit strange tbh lol | |||
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" i am giving up...he either doesnt understand or is flaming, either way i am bored with him
haha yeah does seem a bit strange tbh lol"A bit????  | |||
