FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Getting First Meet With Couple
Getting First Meet With Couple
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What's the key to meeting a couple for fun?
I don't want to be dishonest or omit the truth that I'm a bit nervous - given its not something I've ever done before
However experience seems to be what a lot of these couples are looking for |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just be honest,normal, genuine and respectful. Some of us couples are just as nervous as you single guys. Its just about having fun and everyone being happy. |
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We don’t look for experience we look for someone who we will enjoy sharing time with. Might be physical. Might be likes. Might be that unexplainable, experience certainly not high. If you mean no veris well that lack of effort. Socials. Clubs etc. A non verified and non descriptive profile, errrr guess what. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Be clear about what you want and make sure what they want matches it.
Don't jump through hoops and never think that you're not an equal."
Good advice - thank you.
However looks like I've more or less messaged every couple in my area with little interest
I'll perhaps leave it for a couple months and try again
By jump through hoops, do you have examples of what these would be? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We don’t look for experience we look for someone who we will enjoy sharing time with. Might be physical. Might be likes. Might be that unexplainable, experience certainly not high. If you mean no veris well that lack of effort. Socials. Clubs etc. A non verified and non descriptive profile, errrr guess what. "
Thanks for the response.
Would a single verification (like in my case) be considered enough in your opinion? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just be honest,normal, genuine and respectful. Some of us couples are just as nervous as you single guys. Its just about having fun and everyone being happy. "
Thanks - I'll take this advice on board |
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"Be clear about what you want and make sure what they want matches it.
Don't jump through hoops and never think that you're not an equal.
Good advice - thank you.
However looks like I've more or less messaged every couple in my area with little interest
I'll perhaps leave it for a couple months and try again
By jump through hoops, do you have examples of what these would be?"
Some couples seem to us to treat single men as if they're just a commodity, maintain your dignity is all I say.
It sounds to me as if the reality of fab hasn't met your expectations. What were you hoping for when you joined? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Be clear about what you want and make sure what they want matches it.
Don't jump through hoops and never think that you're not an equal.
Good advice - thank you.
However looks like I've more or less messaged every couple in my area with little interest
I'll perhaps leave it for a couple months and try again
By jump through hoops, do you have examples of what these would be?
Some couples seem to us to treat single men as if they're just a commodity, maintain your dignity is all I say.
It sounds to me as if the reality of fab hasn't met your expectations. What were you hoping for when you joined?"
I didn't have expectations (I've been on here before, a few years ago).
However I am only human. I was hoping to just have fun, gain new experiences, and meet some cool, attractive people (and of course, not be ignored so often). |
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"What's the key to meeting a couple for fun?
I don't want to be dishonest or omit the truth that I'm a bit nervous - given its not something I've ever done before
However experience seems to be what a lot of these couples are looking for "
We look for veri’s And experience because we’ve been let down lots by guys with neither of those things. A lot of couples have families and plan meetings a long way in advance, it’s not great when we’re let down at the last. The other thing a lot of guys don’t realise is that the experience starts the minute a date is in the diary. A couple of weeks of intense, mad sex on the promise of doing something long awaited and very naughty... couples like us with our commitments need to be as sure as we can that the evening will go ahead as planned. It’s a bitter pill when guys get cold feet on the night.
Best of luck with your search mate. |
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"Be clear about what you want and make sure what they want matches it.
Don't jump through hoops and never think that you're not an equal.
Good advice - thank you.
However looks like I've more or less messaged every couple in my area with little interest
I'll perhaps leave it for a couple months and try again
By jump through hoops, do you have examples of what these would be?
Some couples seem to us to treat single men as if they're just a commodity, maintain your dignity is all I say.
It sounds to me as if the reality of fab hasn't met your expectations. What were you hoping for when you joined?
I didn't have expectations (I've been on here before, a few years ago).
However I am only human. I was hoping to just have fun, gain new experiences, and meet some cool, attractive people (and of course, not be ignored so often)."
It's usually pretty difficult for single men unfortunately. All you can do is be patient and keep hoping.
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What's the key to meeting a couple for fun?
I don't want to be dishonest or omit the truth that I'm a bit nervous - given its not something I've ever done before
However experience seems to be what a lot of these couples are looking for
We look for veri’s And experience because we’ve been let down lots by guys with neither of those things. A lot of couples have families and plan meetings a long way in advance, it’s not great when we’re let down at the last. The other thing a lot of guys don’t realise is that the experience starts the minute a date is in the diary. A couple of weeks of intense, mad sex on the promise of doing something long awaited and very naughty... couples like us with our commitments need to be as sure as we can that the evening will go ahead as planned. It’s a bitter pill when guys get cold feet on the night.
Best of luck with your search mate. "
Thanks for the response.
I understand completely. I would probably be the same. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Be clear about what you want and make sure what they want matches it.
Don't jump through hoops and never think that you're not an equal.
Good advice - thank you.
However looks like I've more or less messaged every couple in my area with little interest
I'll perhaps leave it for a couple months and try again
By jump through hoops, do you have examples of what these would be?
Some couples seem to us to treat single men as if they're just a commodity, maintain your dignity is all I say.
It sounds to me as if the reality of fab hasn't met your expectations. What were you hoping for when you joined?
I didn't have expectations (I've been on here before, a few years ago).
However I am only human. I was hoping to just have fun, gain new experiences, and meet some cool, attractive people (and of course, not be ignored so often).
It's usually pretty difficult for single men unfortunately. All you can do is be patient and keep hoping.
Good luck!"
Thanks, I appreciate it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I am similar to you. I'm looking for a couple, but I have no expectations. I enjoy just being in this world where my fantasies are normal, I come and go as I want. I spend too much time on the forums and get a little bit jealous of all the people having sex! Ha ha ha!
Like you, my nervousness holds me back. But I am sure we both know that going to socials is the way into the lifestyle - sending messages is so unlikely to get you anywhere, (I rarely send any at all..... and then I cop out and message a single girl! Ha ha ha!) So build up to a social in your area, don't pressure yourself though. It's meant to be fun.
On a positive note, your honesty is something that I think will be noticed by couples that are suited to you. You need to remember that you want to be with a couple. A lot of single guys will see a couple as a last desperate way to have sex with a woman. This is definately not what couples want, you do have a lot to offer. Plan for the long haul, don't give up. Keep going |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What's the key to meeting a couple for fun?
I don't want to be dishonest or omit the truth that I'm a bit nervous - given its not something I've ever done before
However experience seems to be what a lot of these couples are looking for "
I was exactly the same the first time, however the couple were really easy to get on with. This helped massively.
Defo meet up for a social first |
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We have all been in your position OP. No one can give you step by step advice this is something you need to deal with yourself and it is a learning curve as everyone is different.
Be polite at all times, be true to yourself and keep your pride intact.
Be prepared to show empathy to people's private situations which might mean it takes a while to actually meet.
Best wishes and have lots of sexy fun! |
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By *isa2018Couple
over a year ago
East Northamptonshire |
Honesty is always a good starting point. Some couples will want experience and verifications, whilst others will love the idea of a newcomer. We all had our first time in the swinging world so it's not like it's something unusual to be nervous and not know what to expect. That can be part of the excitement. Certainly wed be interested to see and hear more. The only issue would be the likelihood of a face to face meet due to distance. |
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You can use the meets search function to find events in your area. You could also post a status asking to be considered?
Your profile is really good, by the way! Great pics and a nice bio. Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You can use the meets search function to find events in your area. You could also post a status asking to be considered?
Your profile is really good, by the way! Great pics and a nice bio. Good luck! "
Thanks for the tips.
And thanks! Good to know some people like. I also like yours |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Turn up!!!
We had 2 meets planned for last 2 days and have been let down at the last hour! And that was for a hotwife meet!
"
Sorry to hear that. I always turn up when I say I will.
Great profile by the way! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Be clear about what you want and make sure what they want matches it.
Don't jump through hoops and never think that you're not an equal.
Good advice - thank you.
However looks like I've more or less messaged every couple in my area with little interest
I'll perhaps leave it for a couple months and try again
By jump through hoops, do you have examples of what these would be?
Some couples seem to us to treat single men as if they're just a commodity, maintain your dignity is all I say.
It sounds to me as if the reality of fab hasn't met your expectations. What were you hoping for when you joined?"
Great advice from nicecouple.. They are always very helpful on the forums |
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I'm sure I've said this on a forum to you before but where you are probably isn't helping. Might be worth trying to get down to Glasgow for a weekend and going to one of the big socials. There's on in June - there's a thread for it on the Scottish forum.
For us, we probably wouldn't want to arrange a meet at all with a single guy just for the pressure and expectation plus the chance they don't show. If we met someone we liked at a club or are aged to meet them there then that might be different. If a social drink went well then the chance of more would be decent.
You do have a good profile and good pics maybe a bit young for some? I'm sure you'd do well in person
V x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm sure I've said this on a forum to you before but where you are probably isn't helping. Might be worth trying to get down to Glasgow for a weekend and going to one of the big socials. There's on in June - there's a thread for it on the Scottish forum.
For us, we probably wouldn't want to arrange a meet at all with a single guy just for the pressure and expectation plus the chance they don't show. If we met someone we liked at a club or are aged to meet them there then that might be different. If a social drink went well then the chance of more would be decent.
You do have a good profile and good pics maybe a bit young for some? I'm sure you'd do well in person
V x"
Thanks for the advice
My location isn't great, you're right. However I'm actively looking for jobs down south. Hopefully I end up somewhere a little more lively.
And thanks! I never viewed myself as that young - but I suppose on this site I am. X
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We have all been in your position OP. No one can give you step by step advice this is something you need to deal with yourself and it is a learning curve as everyone is different.
Be polite at all times, be true to yourself and keep your pride intact.
Be prepared to show empathy to people's private situations which might mean it takes a while to actually meet.
Best wishes and have lots of sexy fun!"
Thanks great advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Turn up!!!
We had 2 meets planned for last 2 days and have been let down at the last hour! And that was for a hotwife meet!
"
The no shows are problems for us too. Spend ages chatting thru texts all boasting what they will do on the night then bottle out at the last minute wife puts lot of effort into getting ready for a meet then to be let down at the last minute really upsets her and makes me angry |
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I quite like your profile. We are inundated with messages from single guys and most have vieutlaly empty profile so at least you're past that hurdle.
Just make sure you tailor each message to each profile and be patient.
Sx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I quite like your profile. We are inundated with messages from single guys and most have vieutlaly empty profile so at least you're past that hurdle.
Just make sure you tailor each message to each profile and be patient.
Sx "
Glad you like it you guys have a great profile too!
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Be polite, as honest as you can be and spend at least as much time/interest in the M as the F of the couple.. Importantly, be able to accomodate.."
I'm currently unable to accommodate but hopefully that'll change once I've found myself a permanent job |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Turn up!!!
We had 2 meets planned for last 2 days and have been let down at the last hour! And that was for a hotwife meet!
The no shows are problems for us too. Spend ages chatting thru texts all boasting what they will do on the night then bottle out at the last minute wife puts lot of effort into getting ready for a meet then to be let down at the last minute really upsets her and makes me angry"
Same here, just pisses me off that people are disrespectful to the scenario also - we are a couple and you are meeting my wife on her own!
She spends time getting ready and excited to be let down at last minute.
We are human we understand plans can chance but have decency to tell us early - not ignore messages all day.
Anyway - their loss! |
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"I quite like your profile. We are inundated with messages from single guys and most have vieutlaly empty profile so at least you're past that hurdle.
Just make sure you tailor each message to each profile and be patient.
Sx
Glad you like it you guys have a great profile too!
"
Thank you x |
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By *lan157Man
over a year ago
a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex |
Just remember that you are a player in the couples fantasy or their game. That means you have to be able to correspond and arrange meets in the way that suits them and when you have met play in the way that they had in mind. It's going to be different for every couple . Clearly they need lots of input from you but it's their agenda so find out what it is. Get it right and you will get invited again. |
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