FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Please help
Please help
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Been here now for nearly 3 years, successfully only managed two meets, we both keep fit, we both look after ourselfs, we have moved our boundaries to accomodate we have tried alsorts, what are we doing wrong?
We are lucky to get one message a month sometimes longer, we rarely get replies on messages we send.
Whats our problem cause we cant figure it out?
Thank you  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nice Tats. I think there is hundreds of couples on here you have to stand out and lower your standards we came looking for a unicorn granted we only been here a short time but haven’t found her couples could be fun especially if both fs are bi
Mrscxxx |
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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
Ok, you are looking dor quite a unique set of requirements...and something that is a rare commodity on here:
1. You want a single bi female for fem on fem play.
2. You can only meet on a single Friday night a month.
3. You are quite young for the average age of the site.
These three will each reduce the pool of those potentially interested...which means you’ll end up with far fewer meets.
Have you considered going to clubs and socials to meet other women locally? Most clubs have a girls night, or one where single bi women get to swan in for free  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok, you are looking dor quite a unique set of requirements...and something that is a rare commodity on here:
1. You want a single bi female for fem on fem play.
2. You can only meet on a single Friday night a month.
3. You are quite young for the average age of the site.
These three will each reduce the pool of those potentially interested...which means you’ll end up with far fewer meets.
Have you considered going to clubs and socials to meet other women locally? Most clubs have a girls night, or one where single bi women get to swan in for free "
Really oooh I want to go lol |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
Sadly, there are not that many couples with a bi female, willing to meet to have just the ladies playing or single bi ladies who are available one particular Friday a month and within travelling distance of Norwich.
Maybe you need to find some other available time. If you want a social first, your current once a month would make this difficult.
If you want to swing, you will need to do some travelling or attend club's.
Sadly your wishlist, availability and location are not helping your success rate
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"I know how you feel. I’ve been on this site...off and on for 12mths. I’ve yet to receive a reply from a message never mind meet anyone "
Looking at your profile you want to meet an " adventurous anyone"
and then you moan about not being verified.
Check out the numerous threads about improving your profile and you might get some replies. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others "
Have you tried clubs? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others
Have you tried clubs?"
The problem with going to a club is it requires effort on your part....
You have to get dressed up , socialize and be charming.....
That might be asking for too much for some people....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Cant - too far away , and only time we can is if we book holiday off work, which then means if we dont get what we would like from a club night we are wasting holiday |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Cant - too far away , and only time we can is if we book holiday off work, which then means if we dont get what we would like from a club night we are wasting holiday
Have you tried feeld? "
Haha yes about 7 members in norfolk if that |
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Sometimes you have to accept that your current situation isn't compatible with the sex life you want unless you're prepared to put a huge amount of effort in. It could be that you need to be patient until your circumstances are different |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
"Cant - too far away , and only time we can is if we book holiday off work, which then means if we dont get what we would like from a club night we are wasting holiday "
Seems like you have answered your own question. To many barriers and not able to put in the effort due to the lifestyle you live. Like anything in life, one will only get results due to the time and effort one puts into something. It took a long time for us to get out of this lifestyle what we were looking for, masses amount of networking and effort. |
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By *isa2018Couple
over a year ago
East Northamptonshire |
You're looking for single bi fems or couples with bi fems where the men aren't allowed to play with the fems. That is going to limit compatible matches quite a lot.
We have a similar thing with S not being bi, where we are looking just for straight play between couples.
A lot of couples seem to have bi fems but I would guess they are also interested in the gents playing with the ladies too. You want the bisexual interaction but without the straight interaction.
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others "
Nothing wrong with your profile or requirements, just that you target market is absolutely tiny, as others have said.
We’re still newbies, but swinging does require serious commitment, we drive miles to clubs that we love, take holidays, sickies, stay up all night, etc lol
As your school teachers told you, you’ll get out what you put in.... |
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By *ng1983Couple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon tyne |
We are very similar in what we are looking for here. Me (female) does not play with guys, but happy for girls to join in with me and Mr. However we have had a few successful meets from here. But we have the most luck in club situations and organised socials. Our very first social resulted in a very hot 5sum and we made some awesome friends. Sometimes we go to a club and only play with each other. We don't see it as a waste. We have still had fun and talked to lots of cool people. You have to put the effort in to get the results you want. If that means popping a few holidays in a year to attend a club night then go for it. You will have a great time whether or not you find someone. It's really worth a go if messaging on here isn't working for you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Like many people have said I think you should try clubs, it would be much easier for you I think"
Yes apparently so , we will try soon hopefully, most time we are free though it always seems to be events like bbw and things we aint into though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We are only looking for a single bi female and we are aware we could be waiting a while, we are trying to go to more socials etc, sadly we know what we looking for is like a needle in a haystack and even then we probably won’t appeal to many but that’s life, we know this place isn’t the shagfest it is for some couples who have a wider search area.
Good luck.
Danish x |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
"Like many people have said I think you should try clubs, it would be much easier for you I think
Yes apparently so , we will try soon hopefully, most time we are free though it always seems to be events like bbw and things we aint into though"
Have a look at Attic. You don't need to dress down. Staff and security are amazing. Always feel safe so as new to clubs you will have some reasurance. It no way cliquey and the people who go are always approachable. You always find folk will advise to go to their club. We always advice people to what may fit their criterea. If you want to go further north, we have always sent nebies to clubs to Quest Leeds on a Couples/single female night. Everyone we have recommended it to have thanked us and attended again. If you are not comfortable with dressing down when you enter a club Chameleons or Cupids is not for you, both great clubs according to everyone who have been. We do much better meeting in clubs than we ever wil meeting folk for meets from fab. Fab is great to keep in touch with people we have met in clubs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know how you feel. I’ve been on this site...off and on for 12mths. I’ve yet to receive a reply from a message never mind meet anyone "
i was told on here that it is polite to delete messages and not respond so dont expect replies just keep plodding on - when someone does react to you it is a bonus
good luck to you
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Been here now for nearly 3 years, successfully only managed two meets, we both keep fit, we both look after ourselfs, we have moved our boundaries to accomodate we have tried alsorts, what are we doing wrong?
We are lucky to get one message a month sometimes longer, we rarely get replies on messages we send.
Get yourselves to a club x
Whats our problem cause we cant figure it out?
Thank you x"
|
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others
Have you tried clubs?
The problem with going to a club is it requires effort on your part....
You have to get dressed up , socialize and be charming.....
That might be asking for too much for some people....
"
Hold on if a club is too much effort that really shows that you’re only looking for a quick shag. Also putting in the effort means you get meets I’m not saying the OPs aren’t putting in effort it’s just this statement is completely inaccurate as most club dress codes are smart casual. Also cool name OP |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Profile changed in hope of it being more informative  x
Are you looking for profile advice? Just checking as I don’t like getting bans "
Go for it, nothing offends us haha x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others
Have you tried clubs?
The problem with going to a club is it requires effort on your part....
You have to get dressed up , socialize and be charming.....
That might be asking for too much for some people....
Hold on if a club is too much effort that really shows that you’re only looking for a quick shag. Also putting in the effort means you get meets I’m not saying the OPs aren’t putting in effort it’s just this statement is completely inaccurate as most club dress codes are smart casual. Also cool name OP"
Thanks best game series ever x |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"Been here now for nearly 3 years, successfully only managed two meets, we both keep fit, we both look after ourselfs, we have moved our boundaries to accomodate we have tried alsorts, what are we doing wrong?
We are lucky to get one message a month sometimes longer, we rarely get replies on messages we send.
Whats our problem cause we cant figure it out?
Thank you x"
broaden one's horizons try a club or maybe open yourself to a few couples you may deemed NOT TO YOUR STANDARD make yourself a bit more approachable if to just the social side we are all supposed to be making friends ain't we. |
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others
Have you tried clubs?
The problem with going to a club is it requires effort on your part....
You have to get dressed up , socialize and be charming.....
That might be asking for too much for some people....
Hold on if a club is too much effort that really shows that you’re only looking for a quick shag. Also putting in the effort means you get meets I’m not saying the OPs aren’t putting in effort it’s just this statement is completely inaccurate as most club dress codes are smart casual. Also cool name OP
Thanks best game series ever x"
It is a very good game series I’ve not played the latest one though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Profile changed in hope of it being more informative x
Are you looking for profile advice? Just checking as I don’t like getting bans
Go for it, nothing offends us haha x"
My main observation is that every line in your profile starts ‘we’. You say what you would like but at no point do you say what you have to offer to the lady you seek.  xxx |
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"We can only meet out once a month, due to kids. But we can have people over we feel comftable with, we have opted out of searching for unicorns, and like mentioned willing to meet couples but then when we put that in our profile no one would meet us either so we took it back out on the reccomendation of others,
Seems to us that basically we want to swing, but we cant no mattwr how hard we try and please others "
Everything is summed up by "we want to swing"
You want a magical bi female to arrive at your house to make your fantasies happen, without considering what you might offer in return
I have been that unicorn and would trot on by.
As others have suggested try a club, right now you are asking for the earth and offering very little
Ms Icebreaker |
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