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Male bi v Female bi
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By *ilkey69 OP Man
over a year ago
Barnsley |
Why is a female status such a turn on when it shows the lady is bi .
But when the male is bi it's a turn off.
Even some posts state not interested in bi males but the female half is bi.
Confused. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unfortunately male bisexuality is about 20 years behind female sexuality in acceptance in society. Still a lot of stigma and stereotypes around bi men. lots more reasons, than what I have added. Easier to accept it and focus on people who enjoy bi men
Ultimately people do have a choice, about who they meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Simply put, person preferences. If you want to know why you need to ask people personality.
For us it is because Saz is bi and I am not. So a bi male is no use when is comes to play. Plus I only have one bi male friend and he needs to be put on a watch list. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is still alit of bi-erasure within society especially around bi males.
When I joined fab I was told to out myself as straight as alot of people will not be interested in meeting us
For me it's about pride I came out as bi in the 80s this period of time was a very nasty period if you where bi X I was kicked out of gay clubs for not being gay enough and beaten up by straight males that saw me as a threat.
It has got a lot better but there are still issues. I think slot if the issues are the myths around d bi sexual men.
1. That a person's Mascalinity is somehow tied into their sexuality. That a bi man is less than a full blooded male.
2. That all bi men just sleep around and have in protected sex. Indeed like any group of people some do some do not
3. That all bi men are desease ridden as they will sleep with anything with a pulse. Mind you from the messages alot if men straight or bi are the same.
4. That female on female is a big fantasy for most men so they are willing to accept that. I will say I know a few ladies that like watching man on man lol
5. That bi men will break boundaries. O have been told by couples that they would meet us but the last bi man tried to suck the males cock and he's straight. Breaking boundaries is nothing to do with being bi it's about being disrespectful and twatish behaviour
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One of the best reasons we hear is "Bi men lie to get laid" and yet these same people have met plenty of "straight" men who are lying about being bi, talk about punishing the wrong crowd. Surely those being honest about being bi are the ones NOT lying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Simply put, person preferences. If you want to know why you need to ask people personality.
For us it is because Saz is bi and I am not. So a bi male is no use when is comes to play. Plus I only have one bi male friend and he needs to be put on a watch list."
You are aware bi males can play straight and will not just jump on you.
And wow on the watch list bi erasure at its hight there.
Has he done anything to deserve that or is that just your opinion |
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By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago
Gosport |
At least I have never had the open hostility on Fab that I got when I was honest about my sexuality on one of the dating sites. It amazed me how much effort some ladies were putting into sending me hate mail. |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
Often people are not worried if their partner is straight about inviting a no lady to join them, they don't feel the bi lady is going to jump on the straight female partner.
How come feel a no man wouldn't be able to control themselves in a straight 3 sum? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Often people are not worried if their partner is straight about inviting a no lady to join them, they don't feel the bi lady is going to jump on the straight female partner.
How come feel a no man wouldn't be able to control themselves in a straight 3 sum? "
I think slot of the time its the males ego and thinks that any man would want to jump him.
Sometimes i think it worries them as they have had their own questions around their sexuality x |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Whilst I agree with some of what has been said above - I also think there's a mis-conception by some on the bisexual male side of the equation about how many people won't meet them, that plays into this too.
As a bisexual guy, who is open to meeting other guys alone, as well as playing with couples where the male half is bisexual, and also someone who is happy to play "straight" if required - I've rarely encountered hostility on here and would go so far as to say that those that won't meet bi guys at all are in a minority - this was backed up by recent forum surveys (with admittedly a small sample of 34 responses in one, and 22 in the other) where in both polls over 90% stated they either were not bothered by a guy being bisexual, or actively looked for it.
So I think there is an element of bisexual guys who can't get meets (for other reasons such as crappy profile, too high expectations etc) who use their bisexuality as something to blame for their lack of "success".
As for those that think we can't keep our hands to ourselves - there seems to be a misconception that we'd be "missing out" or pretending somehow if our bisexual side doesn't come into play during a meet - which fails to acknowledge that just because we are bisexual doesn't mean we *always* look to play bisexually - I'm perfectly happy to indulge the spectrum of my sexuality based on any given situation, and in fact choose from that spectrum dependent on both my mood, circumstances and situation. J
ust because I'm bisexual doesn't mean I *always* want to indulge my bi side or am compromising it somehow when I don't. |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"Why is a female status such a turn on when it shows the lady is bi .
But when the male is bi it's a turn off.
Even some posts state not interested in bi males but the female half is bi.
Confused."
Because it two women going at it
Most men love two females going at it, where as only a FEW ladies like to see two men sucking each other off, and even less want to see sweetcorn at the end of a dick. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s neither a turn on or off for us, we simply don’t meet straight women or bi men, we don’t expect people to compromise in play and we don’t either, those that say “but he can play straight” that’s fine but play with someone else as I would never, as a bi women be that desperate to “play straight” to get a meet, call us bi male phobic if you want but add to that straight women phobic too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whilst I agree with some of what has been said above - I also think there's a mis-conception by some on the bisexual male side of the equation about how many people won't meet them, that plays into this too.
As a bisexual guy, who is open to meeting other guys alone, as well as playing with couples where the male half is bisexual, and also someone who is happy to play "straight" if required - I've rarely encountered hostility on here and would go so far as to say that those that won't meet bi guys at all are in a minority - this was backed up by recent forum surveys (with admittedly a small sample of 34 responses in one, and 22 in the other) where in both polls over 90% stated they either were not bothered by a guy being bisexual, or actively looked for it.
So I think there is an element of bisexual guys who can't get meets (for other reasons such as crappy profile, too high expectations etc) who use their bisexuality as something to blame for their lack of "success".
As for those that think we can't keep our hands to ourselves - there seems to be a misconception that we'd be "missing out" or pretending somehow if our bisexual side doesn't come into play during a meet - which fails to acknowledge that just because we are bisexual doesn't mean we *always* look to play bisexually - I'm perfectly happy to indulge the spectrum of my sexuality based on any given situation, and in fact choose from that spectrum dependent on both my mood, circumstances and situation. J
ust because I'm bisexual doesn't mean I *always* want to indulge my bi side or am compromising it somehow when I don't."
Agree with this.
Could also argue that bi males are actually the true 'Alpha males' on here. They seem to tick more boxes and are in demand by singles and couples. So what if a minority don't want to play with them... |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"It’s neither a turn on or off for us, we simply don’t meet straight women or bi men, we don’t expect people to compromise in play and we don’t either, those that say “but he can play straight” that’s fine but play with someone else as I would never, as a bi women be that desperate to “play straight” to get a meet, call us bi male phobic if you want but add to that straight women phobic too"
We've been round this loop before
As a bisexual male - if I *choose* not to indulge my bisexual side (as I have done many times) - I'm not compromising, I'm not "desperate to get a meet" or any of what you suggest - I'm simply *choosing* out of personal choice not to play bisexually on that occasion. Same as when I play non-kink I am *choosing* not to indulge my submissive side.
I totally respect your *choice* not to meet bisexual men and would never suggest you should compromise that - but please do not suggest I, or most other bisexual men I know, are compromising a thing when we *choose* to play straight. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
".
Could also argue that bi males are actually the true 'Alpha males' on here. They seem to tick more boxes and are in demand by singles and couples. So what if a minority don't want to play with them..."
I disagree - an "Alpha male" is a character type rather than being defined by sexuality - I'm not alpha, nor would I want to be, in fact I'm probably the polar opposite of what would be considered "Alpha" but I am bisexual and proudly so - I just accept that some will not want to meet me because of it, but that plenty will either not be bothered by it or will seek me out because of it. |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"even less want to see sweetcorn at the end of a dick."
You are aware that men generally wear condoms when they have anal sex, right? No sweetcorn in willies to worry about!
In my experience (and I have alot of experience of watching) man on man anal sex is about as mucky as man on women anal sex. That's to say, it isn't if you don't surprise it on your partner (which would be wrong anyway). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is a female status such a turn on when it shows the lady is bi .
But when the male is bi it's a turn off.
Even some posts state not interested in bi males but the female half is bi.
Confused.
Because it two women going at it
Most men love two females going at it, where as only a FEW ladies like to see two men sucking each other off, and even less want to see sweetcorn at the end of a dick."
Really what a load. Take it that's the same for all anal sex then |
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By *pertureTV/TS
over a year ago
New Ferry, wirral in stockings and sussies |
i think the most simple answer is ignorance, followed by fear, with a little self doubt thrown in, I have been bi for as long as ive had erections, but choosy with it, trust me I have to find you interesting/attractive before even contemplating touching you |
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"Why is a female status such a turn on when it shows the lady is bi .
But when the male is bi it's a turn off.
Even some posts state not interested in bi males but the female half is bi.
Confused."
Because it’s not seen to be ‘manly’, and a true heterosexual. Very dated opinion, and people back then were more religious.
Nowadays it’s proving to be popular/people are
more open about it, and more men coming out.
No one else’s opinion should matter anyway. Do what you want, with whoever you want. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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".
Could also argue that bi males are actually the true 'Alpha males' on here. They seem to tick more boxes and are in demand by singles and couples. So what if a minority don't want to play with them...
I disagree - an "Alpha male" is a character type rather than being defined by sexuality - I'm not alpha, nor would I want to be, in fact I'm probably the polar opposite of what would be considered "Alpha" but I am bisexual and proudly so - I just accept that some will not want to meet me because of it, but that plenty will either not be bothered by it or will seek me out because of it."
My use of the term 'Alpha Male' was purely to suggest bi males' dominance in the Fab arena. Not anyone's sexual, or personal traits. I avoided 'Male Unicorn' as it seems unpopular.
If I were a straight couple I would just include bi play in my do's and don'ts beforehand. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
".
Could also argue that bi males are actually the true 'Alpha males' on here. They seem to tick more boxes and are in demand by singles and couples. So what if a minority don't want to play with them...
I disagree - an "Alpha male" is a character type rather than being defined by sexuality - I'm not alpha, nor would I want to be, in fact I'm probably the polar opposite of what would be considered "Alpha" but I am bisexual and proudly so - I just accept that some will not want to meet me because of it, but that plenty will either not be bothered by it or will seek me out because of it.
My use of the term 'Alpha Male' was purely to suggest bi males' dominance in the Fab arena. Not anyone's sexual, or personal traits. I avoided 'Male Unicorn' as it seems unpopular.
If I were a straight couple I would just include bi play in my do's and don'ts beforehand. "
Not sure I'd say bi males had any kind of dominance either - we might have more choice possibly, but it still comes down to attraction and other factors ultimately. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yay I can join in..
I think some bisexual women and men are very popular on the forum. Usually the ones brave enough to wear their sexualities on their sleeve and discuss it openly. Our honesty helps others come to terms with how they feel. Its only natural.
As for the term Alpha? You're striding into D/s realms with that particular word.
I'm definately of the view that alpha males and females exist. Though I think they're few and far between and not always the people you think they are.
Gemini Man may not consider himself an alpha male, but I can see it in him.
He's amassed an impressive roster of Fab Friends, many of whom I also like talking to. He's seen as a Father Figure by most. Intelligent and can turn your mind in a way that you see a new perspective.
He defends and cares for his Tribe.
If that's not an alpha male, I don't know what is.
What he gets up to behind closed curtains doesn't change that one bit. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have no problems with what others are looking for because the world of swinging is big enough to cope for all tastes.
We won't meet couples where Straight appears in either profile simply because we are looking for all round bi play and there's little point in making others feel uncomfortable or left out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yay I can join in..
I think some bisexual women and men are very popular on the forum. Usually the ones brave enough to wear their sexualities on their sleeve and discuss it openly. Our honesty helps others come to terms with how they feel. Its only natural.
As for the term Alpha? You're striding into D/s realms with that particular word.
I'm definately of the view that alpha males and females exist. Though I think they're few and far between and not always the people you think they are.
Gemini Man may not consider himself an alpha male, but I can see it in him.
He's amassed an impressive roster of Fab Friends, many of whom I also like talking to. He's seen as a Father Figure by most. Intelligent and can turn your mind in a way that you see a new perspective.
He defends and cares for his Tribe.
If that's not an alpha male, I don't know what is.
What he gets up to behind closed curtains doesn't change that one bit. "
Hope no one thinks I am knocking Gemini Man. On the contrary I have seen him on various similar posts, and think he does a great job.
I think bi male acceptance is increasing, it just takes time for peoples' views and opinions to change. Openmindedness is definately on the rise. Threads like this one play a big part in people's understanding of bi males and will impact on some, not all. Slow change, yes - but still change.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yay I can join in..
I think some bisexual women and men are very popular on the forum. Usually the ones brave enough to wear their sexualities on their sleeve and discuss it openly. Our honesty helps others come to terms with how they feel. Its only natural.
As for the term Alpha? You're striding into D/s realms with that particular word.
I'm definately of the view that alpha males and females exist. Though I think they're few and far between and not always the people you think they are.
Gemini Man may not consider himself an alpha male, but I can see it in him.
He's amassed an impressive roster of Fab Friends, many of whom I also like talking to. He's seen as a Father Figure by most. Intelligent and can turn your mind in a way that you see a new perspective.
He defends and cares for his Tribe.
If that's not an alpha male, I don't know what is.
What he gets up to behind closed curtains doesn't change that one bit.
Hope no one thinks I am knocking Gemini Man. On the contrary I have seen him on various similar posts, and think he does a great job.
I think bi male acceptance is increasing, it just takes time for peoples' views and opinions to change. Openmindedness is definately on the rise. Threads like this one play a big part in people's understanding of bi males and will impact on some, not all. Slow change, yes - but still change.
"
I don't think you were knocking him at all I think he knocks himself a bit lol. He's an alpha male. Anyone else who doesn't look after their people in the same way. Isn't. In my humble opinion.
It's not about being a Bull(y).
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By *ilkey69 OP Man
over a year ago
Barnsley |
"We have no problems with what others are looking for because the world of swinging is big enough to cope for all tastes.
We won't meet couples where Straight appears in either profile simply because we are looking for all round bi play and there's little point in making others feel uncomfortable or left out.
"
That's great everyone has something special to offer and there is lots to go around |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is a female status such a turn on when it shows the lady is bi .
But when the male is bi it's a turn off.
Even some posts state not interested in bi males but the female half is bi.
Confused."
It’s the way the world works |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"
Hope no one thinks I am knocking Gemini Man. On the contrary I have seen him on various similar posts, and think he does a great job.
"
Didn't think that at all and thank you - I just make like Roy Walker used to suggest and say what I see
And Genghis - you're far too kind, dress it up however you like, but one thing I will never be, nor want to be, is an alpha male. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Hope no one thinks I am knocking Gemini Man. On the contrary I have seen him on various similar posts, and think he does a great job.
Didn't think that at all and thank you - I just make like Roy Walker used to suggest and say what I see
And Genghis - you're far too kind, dress it up however you like, but one thing I will never be, nor want to be, is an alpha male."
I know you don't.. but the fact remains. In my eyes. You take care of others. Not control them. |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
I have never met a man I have fancied, I have never had sexual dreams about a man. I have never embraced the thought of being with another man, gosh I must come from the Neander valley.
Now L is totally bi (think our veri’s give that away) would I stop her playing that way....
Don’t think so.
Everyone has the right to know what they like and hopefully not project thier preference on others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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this is a great topic i try to be true to myself and others and have not got high expectations about meets etc i think bisexual is the best way to describe myself although i dont label myself as anything in particular i am just a big mix of lots of things and just go with the flow - it is true that lots of 'straight' guys get in touch and when i mention that i am a guy they say that they are curious which is fine it isnt a problem at all
david |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"this is a great topic i try to be true to myself and others and have not got high expectations about meets etc i think bisexual is the best way to describe myself although i dont label myself as anything in particular i am just a big mix of lots of things and just go with the flow - it is true that lots of 'straight' guys get in touch and when i mention that i am a guy they say that they are curious which is fine it isnt a problem at all
david"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i have been left waiting 3 times in the past for so called 'straight men' who for whatever reason have gone and met men and binned me in the process. Not great. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I haven’t experienced any lack of acceptance of me as I bisexual man on here. I think the more we are open about our sexuality, the more we discuss the dilemmas, misunderstandings and myths, while thoughtfully challenging the ignorance, fears and prejudices that surround bisexual men the more widely it will become accepted and understood. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is a perception that all bi men are engaging in unprotected anal sex with lots of partners. Nothing could be further from the truth. I enjoy cock sucking but as for anal, no thanks and many other guys are the same. Funny how it is such an issue for men to do anal when most women happily partake! This I had to point out to the last person to turn me down even though I am an arse virgin. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is a female status such a turn on when it shows the lady is bi .
But when the male is bi it's a turn off.
Even some posts state not interested in bi males but the female half is bi.
Confused."
2 women fucking is not at all the same as 2 men fucking.
Some people will find one a turn on but not the other.
Some people will find both a total turn off.
Just because a woman is bi doesn't mean she would be turned on by 2 men fucking. Why on earth would she? |
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