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Bi sexual
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"Just need advice on something really, I get turned by both sexes I'm into all things but currently love being fucked in the arse wether it's a woman or man doing it, the only problem is when ever I get 1 on 1 with a man I never get hard like ever, happened a few times now but I'm still so turned on but have no idea why I don't get hard!" If you're not fucking, but you enjoy the experience, does it really matter if youre hard or not? | |||
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 not tried me then x | |||
"As much as I'm enjoying it, I feel bad for the lad I'm with that I'm not hard " If they're top that might not matter | |||
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"So if any of you men was fucking a lad and they wasn't hard would you not be concerned " Don't worry about it. You're not the only one. Same thing happens with me. Doesn't bother me in the slightest. Especially at the start, when you need to be relaxed. Chill. It's not a problem. | |||
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"Do you mean you don't get hard while being anally pleasured OP or when you're with a guy full stop e.g. if he were to suck you? If it's the former then it's a common thing and not something to worry about. " What if it's the latter? I go soft if a man tries to go down on me, well.. I stop them, I don't enjoy it.  | |||
"Do you mean you don't get hard while being anally pleasured OP or when you're with a guy full stop e.g. if he were to suck you? If it's the former then it's a common thing and not something to worry about. What if it's the latter? I go soft if a man tries to go down on me, well.. I stop them, I don't enjoy it. "I stopped short of commenting on that because we don't know if it is the case or even if it is there could be any number of reasons that would probably take a better man than me to get to the (forgive the pun) bottom of it  | |||
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"Do you mean you don't get hard while being anally pleasured OP or when you're with a guy full stop e.g. if he were to suck you? If it's the former then it's a common thing and not something to worry about. What if it's the latter? I go soft if a man tries to go down on me, well.. I stop them, I don't enjoy it.
I stopped short of commenting on that because we don't know if it is the case or even if it is there could be any number of reasons that would probably take a better man than me to get to the (forgive the pun) bottom of it " | |||
"Just need advice on something really, I get turned by both sexes I'm into all things but currently love being fucked in the arse wether it's a woman or man doing it, the only problem is when ever I get 1 on 1 with a man I never get hard like ever, happened a few times now but I'm still so turned on but have no idea why I don't get hard!" If you’re enjoying the experience and your partner is too, it’s not a problem, I’d say. (And as some of the other responses suggest, for some people, fucking a guy with a limp cock is actually more of a turn on...) If there’s not an issue getting hard in other contexts it could be that you’re ‘over-thinking’ and that the need to know what you’re not hard could be the reason (or part of the reason) you’re not hard - if that doesn’t sound too circular! My experience is that some guys find the experience of being fucked shifts their centre of sexual pleasure away from their dick - and if that’s still enjoyable, go with it and don’t worry! | |||
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"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now " And that's when the forums work best - it's easy on here, when the perception can be that everyone apart from you is having great sex, to think you're not normal somehow - so airing these things and getting the reassurance you need is always a good thing | |||
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"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now " It certainly isn’t normal to not get hard when a guy is wanking you or sucking your cock . It may be if you are getting fucked , but other than that it’s far from normal to not get hard . I honestly can’t see why anyone would say it is to be honest . Although I hasten to add it IS normal if you’re not actually bi ....... | |||
"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now It certainly isn’t normal to not get hard when a guy is wanking you or sucking your cock . It may be if you are getting fucked , but other than that it’s far from normal to not get hard . I honestly can’t see why anyone would say it is to be honest . Although I hasten to add it IS normal if you’re not actually bi ......." So you're saying I'm not normal? Or not actually bi? Or there's something wrong with me? | |||
"Just need advice on something really, I get turned by both sexes I'm into all things but currently love being fucked in the arse wether it's a woman or man doing it, the only problem is when ever I get 1 on 1 with a man I never get hard like ever, happened a few times now but I'm still so turned on but have no idea why I don't get hard! If you’re enjoying the experience and your partner is too, it’s not a problem, I’d say. (And as some of the other responses suggest, for some people, fucking a guy with a limp cock is actually more of a turn on...) If there’s not an issue getting hard in other contexts it could be that you’re ‘over-thinking’ and that the need to know what you’re not hard could be the reason (or part of the reason) you’re not hard - if that doesn’t sound too circular! My experience is that some guys find the experience of being fucked shifts their centre of sexual pleasure away from their dick - and if that’s still enjoyable, go with it and don’t worry! " Overthinking.. that's my burden. Wrap myself up in knots sometimes  | |||
"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now It certainly isn’t normal to not get hard when a guy is wanking you or sucking your cock . It may be if you are getting fucked , but other than that it’s far from normal to not get hard . I honestly can’t see why anyone would say it is to be honest . Although I hasten to add it IS normal if you’re not actually bi ....... So you're saying I'm not normal? Or not actually bi? Or there's something wrong with me?" If you never get hard when having fun with a guy then yes to all three . Although if you’re not actually bi then the answer is that you are normal , and there’s nothing wrong with you . If you are sure you are bi , but never get hard , even when the guy is playing with your cock or sucking it , or if you are trying to fuck him , it’s difficult to see how you are bi to be honest . But if you are then that’s not normal and yes there’s probably something wrong with you . More than likely a mental issue if you can get hard when a woman does what the man does . I’m not bi , although I thought it would be good to try it out to be sure . And I had no problem getting hard when I kissed guys , or when they sucked me , or when I fucked them . The problem for me was that I didn’t enjoy a cock in my mouth or in my hand and certainly didn’t want one up my arse , so I wouldn’t reciprocate . Bi selfish perhaps would be fair . | |||
"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now It certainly isn’t normal to not get hard when a guy is wanking you or sucking your cock . It may be if you are getting fucked , but other than that it’s far from normal to not get hard . I honestly can’t see why anyone would say it is to be honest . Although I hasten to add it IS normal if you’re not actually bi ....... So you're saying I'm not normal? Or not actually bi? Or there's something wrong with me? If you never get hard when having fun with a guy then yes to all three . Although if you’re not actually bi then the answer is that you are normal , and there’s nothing wrong with you . If you are sure you are bi , but never get hard , even when the guy is playing with your cock or sucking it , or if you are trying to fuck him , it’s difficult to see how you are bi to be honest . But if you are then that’s not normal and yes there’s probably something wrong with you . More than likely a mental issue if you can get hard when a woman does what the man does . I’m not bi , although I thought it would be good to try it out to be sure . And I had no problem getting hard when I kissed guys , or when they sucked me , or when I fucked them . The problem for me was that I didn’t enjoy a cock in my mouth or in my hand and certainly didn’t want one up my arse , so I wouldn’t reciprocate . Bi selfish perhaps would be fair . " You're not bi? Yet you've done all those things with guys? Didn't one of you lecture me on the importance of being honest last week? Maybe you've a different interpretation or I've misread. I'm only sexually bisexual, not romantically so. I can't look at a man in that light at all, I don't want to kiss, or be affectionate further than friendship. I may have some issues I'm sure, probably a result of suppressing it for a long time, but I've NEVER felt this way with guys. When they ignore my boundaries and attempt to push things, I find I'm instantly turned off. I don't fuck men either. I enjoy receiving anal sex and being submissive purely as a sexual kink.. occasionally. According to Fab and every one with an opinion on it, I HAVE to define myself as Bisexual, otherwise I'm the equivalent of pornographic pond scum. My advice to anyone is.. If you're enjoying yourself, not hurting anyone, not damaging your body. Then don't worry about it too much. Don't worry about what others think, what others say and what others do. We're all different. If you are worried, then ask in the Forum and chances are... One of us has been there, done it and got the t-shirt. | |||
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" My advice to anyone is.. If you're enjoying yourself, not hurting anyone, not damaging your body. Then don't worry about it too much. Don't worry about what others think, what others say and what others do. " *applauds* | |||
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"Great post that and will keep that in mind, it's so confusing at times and I appreciate all that has posted on here to help, love you all " You're welcome Just remember the "Not hurting anyone else" Bit. That's as important as being true to yourself. | |||
"No I’m not bi , I tried it , it was ok but not something I wanted to continue . A bit like ticking the water sports box as a like , then deciding it wasn’t so good and unticking it . I can’t see a problem with that . You’d probably be surprised at what we’ve done ( many who know us wouldn’t be though ! ) but because we’ve done it , that doesn’t mean we want to continue doing it . We are only sexually non monogamous . Not romantically . That’s the nature of swinging and nsa sex . But for us sex needs to include more than just lying back and taking one for the team . Neither of us would meet anyone who doesn’t kiss . We enjoy the whole package . I think the fact that you like to take one up the arse from another guy as a submissive kink does make you bi . And that’s cool . But to suggest to another poster that to never get hard on a meet with another guy is normal is not right . Because it isn’t . Just because it’s how you are , doesn’t mean that’s how everyone is and your kink is not what the op was about . He seemed to want to know why he didn’t get hard . To say it’s normal isn’t the case in most instances ." Well I'll sit back then, maybe see how many "Submissive bottoms" Are soft most, some, or all of the time when playing with other men. That would be a fairer test. Than a man who isn't bisexual telling me (a man who is) that it's wrong to dish out that advice. What would you prefer I say? No mate! You're a wrong un! Get down the docs, have some counselling, get checked out? Taking a cock up your arse requires the muscles in the sphincter to relax. Given everything is connected inside down below. Is it any wonder that the bodies need to relax may overrule the sexual side of the mind? That we can then get a little lost in playing the Sub/Bottom/Tv/TS role.. that it may be more about the mental side of the Fetish? e.g. Someone earlier mentioned Sissycock and not wanting it played with anyway. You may have a lot of experience, but it doesn't make you an expert on something you self confess to not actually being. Even if you'd had more men than me. You strike me as being Social Swingers, which comes across in a lot of your posts. I'm the same, I like you for having that attitude. Don't forget that not everyone here is, a lot may be better suited to a site catering to Fetishes. Where it's not necessarily all about the physical. | |||
"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now It certainly isn’t normal to not get hard when a guy is wanking you or sucking your cock . It may be if you are getting fucked , but other than that it’s far from normal to not get hard . I honestly can’t see why anyone would say it is to be honest . Although I hasten to add it IS normal if you’re not actually bi ....... So you're saying I'm not normal? Or not actually bi? Or there's something wrong with me? If you never get hard when having fun with a guy then yes to all three . Although if you’re not actually bi then the answer is that you are normal , and there’s nothing wrong with you . If you are sure you are bi , but never get hard , even when the guy is playing with your cock or sucking it , or if you are trying to fuck him , it’s difficult to see how you are bi to be honest . But if you are then that’s not normal and yes there’s probably something wrong with you . More than likely a mental issue if you can get hard when a woman does what the man does . I’m not bi , although I thought it would be good to try it out to be sure . And I had no problem getting hard when I kissed guys , or when they sucked me , or when I fucked them . The problem for me was that I didn’t enjoy a cock in my mouth or in my hand and certainly didn’t want one up my arse , so I wouldn’t reciprocate . Bi selfish perhaps would be fair . You're not bi? Yet you've done all those things with guys? Didn't one of you lecture me on the importance of being honest last week? Maybe you've a different interpretation or I've misread. I'm only sexually bisexual, not romantically so. I can't look at a man in that light at all, I don't want to kiss, or be affectionate further than friendship. I may have some issues I'm sure, probably a result of suppressing it for a long time, but I've NEVER felt this way with guys. When they ignore my boundaries and attempt to push things, I find I'm instantly turned off. I don't fuck men either. I enjoy receiving anal sex and being submissive purely as a sexual kink.. occasionally. According to Fab and every one with an opinion on it, I HAVE to define myself as Bisexual, otherwise I'm the equivalent of pornographic pond scum. My advice to anyone is.. If you're enjoying yourself, not hurting anyone, not damaging your body. Then don't worry about it too much. Don't worry about what others think, what others say and what others do. We're all different. If you are worried, then ask in the Forum and chances are... One of us has been there, done it and got the t-shirt. " I agree if it doesn’t hurt anyone else etc... And yes we are all different . But to suggest that not getting hard in a meet is normal isn’t right , because it isn’t . The fact that I tried various bi activities doesn’t make me bi because I decided it wasn’t for me . That’s being honest isn’t it ? If I still fancied a bit of man on man I would put bi on my profile as I did back when I was experimenting . You still do so putting bi is being honest , even though it’s a kink . Any man who likes another man to fuck him is certainly bi , but the fact that it doesn’t cause an erection makes it difficult to see why one would do it . I’ve never understood that whole submissive thing though so please forgive my ignorance . I’ll go back to the bit you said about if it’s not hurting anyone etc..., you mentioned . Mine is not to reason why and all that ........ | |||
"No I’m not bi , I tried it , it was ok but not something I wanted to continue . A bit like ticking the water sports box as a like , then deciding it wasn’t so good and unticking it . I can’t see a problem with that . You’d probably be surprised at what we’ve done ( many who know us wouldn’t be though ! ) but because we’ve done it , that doesn’t mean we want to continue doing it . We are only sexually non monogamous . Not romantically . That’s the nature of swinging and nsa sex . But for us sex needs to include more than just lying back and taking one for the team . Neither of us would meet anyone who doesn’t kiss . We enjoy the whole package . I think the fact that you like to take one up the arse from another guy as a submissive kink does make you bi . And that’s cool . But to suggest to another poster that to never get hard on a meet with another guy is normal is not right . Because it isn’t . Just because it’s how you are , doesn’t mean that’s how everyone is and your kink is not what the op was about . He seemed to want to know why he didn’t get hard . To say it’s normal isn’t the case in most instances . Well I'll sit back then, maybe see how many "Submissive bottoms" Are soft most, some, or all of the time when playing with other men. That would be a fairer test. Than a man who isn't bisexual telling me (a man who is) that it's wrong to dish out that advice. What would you prefer I say? No mate! You're a wrong un! Get down the docs, have some counselling, get checked out? Taking a cock up your arse requires the muscles in the sphincter to relax. Given everything is connected inside down below. Is it any wonder that the bodies need to relax may overrule the sexual side of the mind? That we can then get a little lost in playing the Sub/Bottom/Tv/TS role.. that it may be more about the mental side of the Fetish? e.g. Someone earlier mentioned Sissycock and not wanting it played with anyway. You may have a lot of experience, but it doesn't make you an expert on something you self confess to not actually being. Even if you'd had more men than me. You strike me as being Social Swingers, which comes across in a lot of your posts. I'm the same, I like you for having that attitude. Don't forget that not everyone here is, a lot may be better suited to a site catering to Fetishes. Where it's not necessarily all about the physical. " I don’t disagree with you about the submissive bottoms bit . Thats why I deleted the post that you’ve reposted here ! But notwithstanding that , I’ve always use the wealth of experiences we’ve had to try and give a rounded opinion when posting . Did I miss something with the op , is he a submissive bottom ? Or a sissycock ? Or that he just likes to be humiliated ? My response was based on him being puzzled that he couldn’t get hard when he played with guys . | |||
"Well thank you all for helping realise it's normal ha! Feel better now It certainly isn’t normal to not get hard when a guy is wanking you or sucking your cock . It may be if you are getting fucked , but other than that it’s far from normal to not get hard . I honestly can’t see why anyone would say it is to be honest . Although I hasten to add it IS normal if you’re not actually bi ....... So you're saying I'm not normal? Or not actually bi? Or there's something wrong with me? If you never get hard when having fun with a guy then yes to all three . Although if you’re not actually bi then the answer is that you are normal , and there’s nothing wrong with you . If you are sure you are bi , but never get hard , even when the guy is playing with your cock or sucking it , or if you are trying to fuck him , it’s difficult to see how you are bi to be honest . But if you are then that’s not normal and yes there’s probably something wrong with you . More than likely a mental issue if you can get hard when a woman does what the man does . I’m not bi , although I thought it would be good to try it out to be sure . And I had no problem getting hard when I kissed guys , or when they sucked me , or when I fucked them . The problem for me was that I didn’t enjoy a cock in my mouth or in my hand and certainly didn’t want one up my arse , so I wouldn’t reciprocate . Bi selfish perhaps would be fair . You're not bi? Yet you've done all those things with guys? Didn't one of you lecture me on the importance of being honest last week? Maybe you've a different interpretation or I've misread. I'm only sexually bisexual, not romantically so. I can't look at a man in that light at all, I don't want to kiss, or be affectionate further than friendship. I may have some issues I'm sure, probably a result of suppressing it for a long time, but I've NEVER felt this way with guys. When they ignore my boundaries and attempt to push things, I find I'm instantly turned off. I don't fuck men either. I enjoy receiving anal sex and being submissive purely as a sexual kink.. occasionally. According to Fab and every one with an opinion on it, I HAVE to define myself as Bisexual, otherwise I'm the equivalent of pornographic pond scum. My advice to anyone is.. If you're enjoying yourself, not hurting anyone, not damaging your body. Then don't worry about it too much. Don't worry about what others think, what others say and what others do. We're all different. If you are worried, then ask in the Forum and chances are... One of us has been there, done it and got the t-shirt. I agree if it doesn’t hurt anyone else etc... And yes we are all different . But to suggest that not getting hard in a meet is normal isn’t right , because it isn’t . The fact that I tried various bi activities doesn’t make me bi because I decided it wasn’t for me . That’s being honest isn’t it ? If I still fancied a bit of man on man I would put bi on my profile as I did back when I was experimenting . You still do so putting bi is being honest , even though it’s a kink . Any man who likes another man to fuck him is certainly bi , but the fact that it doesn’t cause an erection makes it difficult to see why one would do it . I’ve never understood that whole submissive thing though so please forgive my ignorance . I’ll go back to the bit you said about if it’s not hurting anyone etc..., you mentioned . Mine is not to reason why and all that ........" I'm done with this conversation. | |||
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"OP dont overthink it. Lots of guys go floppy when assuming the bottom role. As long as you enjoy it, and you talk about it to those you're playing with. why worry just enjoy being you, and having fun." | |||
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"Apologies for this way out theory. Maybe you're not bi. You are turned on by the thought of the sex act, but not attracted to men? Is it all about the sex? Do you do the other stuff with men, normal couple's stuff? Kissing, hugging, holding etc.. If you have chased one sexual high after another, because the previous one no longer gives you the hit like it did.... you are into addiction territory. Hence you may not be bi. Straight sex addicts often have gay sex.... but aren't gay. Like I said it's a way out theory based on almost no information... ha ha! Listen to the other messages. Best wishes " | |||
"Just need advice on something really, I get turned by both sexes I'm into all things but currently love being fucked in the arse wether it's a woman or man doing it, the only problem is when ever I get 1 on 1 with a man I never get hard like ever, happened a few times now but I'm still so turned on but have no idea why I don't get hard! If you’re enjoying the experience and your partner is too, it’s not a problem, I’d say. (And as some of the other responses suggest, for some people, fucking a guy with a limp cock is actually more of a turn on...) If there’s not an issue getting hard in other contexts it could be that you’re ‘over-thinking’ and that the need to know what you’re not hard could be the reason (or part of the reason) you’re not hard - if that doesn’t sound too circular! My experience is that some guys find the experience of being fucked shifts their centre of sexual pleasure away from their dick - and if that’s still enjoyable, go with it and don’t worry! " I would say that your last paragraph hits the nail.right on the head. Certainly does for me. | |||
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