FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Playing it straight
Playing it straight
Jump to: Newest in thread
Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago
Chester/Wirral |
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?" No, have some honour and be proud of who you are it's 2019. If they don't wanna meet then so be it.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
This whole fab swingers business is all about fulfilling fantasies. Thats what we are here for.
Presumably the op as well.
So how come his fantasies are valid and respected but anyone who doesnt have a fantasy about involving bi guys in their sex life is written off as narrow minded?
Its not just about a fuck it is all about imagination and, I say again, fantasy.
The op should stick to his principles about openly declaring himself to be bi. That way he will have a chance to meet people who actually share his fantasy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Hi OP.
It really is up to you, my feeling is there's not a right way necessarily..
On the basis of getting laid more,that, after all is what some of us want,which label will get you more?
Either way good luck Mr. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The thing is I can easily play it straight and it's not a must do for me"
I see from your profile that you are on fab guys. You could have a straight profile for here.
In my experience in had more success with single women with straight on my profile than bi.
Been more successful with bi couples though with bi on my profile.
In terms of honesty i have met couples with bi men, who are registered as straight on their profiles. But believe in being honest, but the decision is yours. Some |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?"
Fab straight is a block from us! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
You are stuck between a rock and a hard place..Your call.However you play it,people will block you, but don't be bullied into the decision.Bi/Gay and Straight can overlap and sometimes its as clear as mud..
You could always have two profiles..
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You are stuck between a rock and a hard place..Your call.However you play it,people will block you, but don't be bullied into the decision.Bi/Gay and Straight can overlap and sometimes its as clear as mud..
You could always have two profiles..
"
Perhaps I can help you understand the previous post by rephrasing it.
You could always lie and open a straight profile.
That sort of attitude is exactly why fab is getting to be so shit. Too many people who will justify any level of dishonesty if it means they get a shag.
And unbelievably it is honest people who chose not to meet bi guys who get abused as prejudiced and narrow minded. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Don't lie. You'll only undermine your own integrity.
Also, from my experience, there are numerous couples on fab where the guy is listed as straight when he's orally-bi.
You might miss out on those as they are the couples who contact me the most |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Don't lie. You'll only undermine your own integrity.
Also, from my experience, there are numerous couples on fab where the guy is listed as straight when he's orally-bi.
You might miss out on those as they are the couples who contact me the most "
Sad but true.
Dont piss away your self respect by lying. No shag is so good its worth that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The thing is I can easily play it straight and it's not a must do for me
I see from your profile that you are on fab guys. You could have a straight profile for here.
In my experience in had more success with single women with straight on my profile than bi.
Been more successful with bi couples though with bi on my profile.
In terms of honesty i have met couples with bi men, who are registered as straight on their profiles. But believe in being honest, but the decision is yours. Some " wtf don't lie just to fuck be honest have fun with people that want you if I was in a couple and found out you'd lied honestly you'd probably not leave in a good State I'd flip honest is best good luck |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You are stuck between a rock and a hard place..Your call.However you play it,people will block you, but don't be bullied into the decision.Bi/Gay and Straight can overlap and sometimes its as clear as mud..
You could always have two profiles..
Perhaps I can help you understand the previous post by rephrasing it.
You could always lie and open a straight profile.
That sort of attitude is exactly why fab is getting to be so shit. Too many people who will justify any level of dishonesty if it means they get a shag.
And unbelievably it is honest people who chose not to meet bi guys who get abused as prejudiced and narrow minded. "
I sorry if you feel I was putting you down for your preference - i wasn't at all. Personally I don't see why it can't be optional. Same if you had anal sex down as one of your likes, I don't think that would entitle anyone to go for it without agreement first |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The thing is I can easily play it straight and it's not a must do for me
I see from your profile that you are on fab guys. You could have a straight profile for here.
In my experience in had more success with single women with straight on my profile than bi.
Been more successful with bi couples though with bi on my profile.
In terms of honesty i have met couples with bi men, who are registered as straight on their profiles. But believe in being honest, but the decision is yours. Some wtf don't lie just to fuck be honest have fun with people that want you if I was in a couple and found out you'd lied honestly you'd probably not leave in a good State I'd flip honest is best good luck"
Just for clarification, i have never lied to get a meet, luckily i don't have to. Before any same sex contact, i had a straight profile and had more success with single women. Just pointing out to the OP the obvious. Agree you should be honest. Happy swinging
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The thing is I can easily play it straight and it's not a must do for me
I see from your profile that you are on fab guys. You could have a straight profile for here.
In my experience in had more success with single women with straight on my profile than bi.
Been more successful with bi couples though with bi on my profile.
In terms of honesty i have met couples with bi men, who are registered as straight on their profiles. But believe in being honest, but the decision is yours. Some wtf don't lie just to fuck be honest have fun with people that want you if I was in a couple and found out you'd lied honestly you'd probably not leave in a good State I'd flip honest is best good luck
Just for clarification, i have never lied to get a meet, luckily i don't have to. Before any same sex contact, i had a straight profile and had more success with single women. Just pointing out to the OP the obvious. Agree you should be honest. Happy swinging
" but did you tell the ladies you was bi as you said you had more success with single woman as straight I'm sure they'd be rather pissed off if they found out after honest is always best |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
When i had success with single ladies, on a straight profile, i was straight at the time. So sexuality or lying never came into it. Personal integrity is important to me.
Sexuality evolves and changes with experiences. I would have been shocjed, if someone said you would be bi, later in life. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
OP if you were female there'd be no issue.
Nobody panics that a bi fem will accidentally touch a straight fem or get distracted during a meet and try something on.
Nor are bi fems ever portrayed as bitch lesbians the same way bi men are thought no different to gay stereotypes.
For some reason there's an assumption that bi automatically means interested in the same sex at all meets and that same sex play will be inevitable. The concept that anyone bi (male or female) is attracted to the opposite sex often far more than their own is overlooked. Tis the double standard of both the real world and in swinging.
So you could lie and change your profile. It may get more meets. Or you could leave it as it is. It may well make no difference to the majority.
Whatever you do there will be those accusing you of telling fibs, pretending to be something you're not and being unfair to others.
Me? I lose myself as curious because I've sucked the odd knob as part of a threesome. That accounts for about 1% of my meets spread over many years and around 0.00000001% of my sex life as a whole.
People will still choose not to me us because of it.
Zero fucks given.
A |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Agree with your end paragraphs and extent of situational bi play, i have had in my sex life, would be lucky to hit 0.25 per cent. No attraction to men and class myself as generally straight.good luck OP |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"OP if you were female there'd be no issue.
Nobody panics that a bi fem will accidentally touch a straight fem or get distracted during a meet and try something on.
Nor are bi fems ever portrayed as bitch lesbians the same way bi men are thought no different to gay stereotypes.
For some reason there's an assumption that bi automatically means interested in the same sex at all meets and that same sex play will be inevitable. The concept that anyone bi (male or female) is attracted to the opposite sex often far more than their own is overlooked. Tis the double standard of both the real world and in swinging.
So you could lie and change your profile. It may get more meets. Or you could leave it as it is. It may well make no difference to the majority.
Whatever you do there will be those accusing you of telling fibs, pretending to be something you're not and being unfair to others.
Me? I lose myself as curious because I've sucked the odd knob as part of a threesome. That accounts for about 1% of my meets spread over many years and around 0.00000001% of my sex life as a whole.
People will still choose not to me us because of it.
Zero fucks given.
A"
*Butch. Not bitch, obviously. Autocarrot....... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When i had success with single ladies, on a straight profile, i was straight at the time. So sexuality or lying never came into it. Personal integrity is important to me.
Sexuality evolves and changes with experiences. I would have been shocjed, if someone said you would be bi, later in life. " and your fully honest it's those that ain't were all her for fun we have a choice so we can have fun with ones that match but if some keep a card from The dealer is so wrong have fun |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When i had success with single ladies, on a straight profile, i was straight at the time. So sexuality or lying never came into it. Personal integrity is important to me.
Sexuality evolves and changes with experiences. I would have been shocjed, if someone said you would be bi, later in life. and your fully honest it's those that ain't were all her for fun we have a choice so we can have fun with ones that match but if some keep a card from The dealer is so wrong have fun"
Agree with you ?? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Whilst it's true that *some* people won't meet bi guys, I think possibly a lot more is made of it than needs to be, usually by bi guys that struggle to get meets at all and look for something other than themselves to blame.
As others have said there are just as many people that actively look for bi guys, as there are that won't meet us (and yes I am one too) so personally I prefer to focus on the former rather than worry about the latter - everyone is entitled to their preferences.
Now that all said, I don't disagree that there's still a stigma attached by some to bisexual guys that is in direct opposition to the almost expectation that a woman is bisexual, but that's a whole other argument and discussion, but It's a stigma that is slowly diminishing with the rise of Bi Nights and even some clubs that advertise as being LBGT friendly at all times and long may that trend continue.
As for hiding your sexuality - personally I don't, and wouldn't meet someone that did as I figure if someone is hiding that, what else are they hiding? Plus, like I said, I prefer to focus on those that will meet me rather than worry about those that won't (so long as they are not homophobic about it). |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This thread has probably ed out a few who avoid bi guys already. You’ll be blocked.
However, if you put straight on your profile and then privately message to admit you’re bi, some who would have been interested will no longer be because you’re not openly bi. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Don't bother living about who you are. A lot of women have a problem with bi men for some reason. I always got quite a few matches on dating sites, the moment I added I was bi to my profile I got next to no matches anymore. I don't see how who I find attractive has any bearing on who I am as a person, I was attractive to them beforehand but now suddenly I'm not because of that one minor thing.
Unfortunately bi men can have it the hardest at times, everyone accepts bi women but not so much men, were disliked by both the straight and gay community |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?"
It's not bias, it's personal choice and in yesteryear there was nothing wrong with it. These days, however, it's something that offends somebody somewhere. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Don't bother living about who you are. A lot of women have a problem with bi men for some reason. I always got quite a few matches on dating sites, the moment I added I was bi to my profile I got next to no matches anymore. I don't see how who I find attractive has any bearing on who I am as a person, I was attractive to them beforehand but now suddenly I'm not because of that one minor thing.
Unfortunately bi men can have it the hardest at times, everyone accepts bi women but not so much men, were disliked by both the straight and gay community "
Not everyone does. Bi women; Yukky |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?"
Nah....be yourself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Don't bother living about who you are. A lot of women have a problem with bi men for some reason. I always got quite a few matches on dating sites, the moment I added I was bi to my profile I got next to no matches anymore. I don't see how who I find attractive has any bearing on who I am as a person, I was attractive to them beforehand but now suddenly I'm not because of that one minor thing.
Unfortunately bi men can have it the hardest at times, everyone accepts bi women but not so much men, were disliked by both the straight and gay community " what's Minor to some is major to others I'd gladly talk to you in pub shop but would I want to take you to bed hell no were you a woman then I take you to bed not the pub it is what it is I'm friendly enough it's my choice but can tar you all with the same brush and set things back even further my daughter is gay her best friend is a gay male there as welcome at mine anytime now go to my parents my mum and dad are ok with her but he ain't welcome Rome wasn't built a day good luck to everyone |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This whole fab swingers business is all about fulfilling fantasies. Thats what we are here for.
Presumably the op as well.
So how come his fantasies are valid and respected but anyone who doesnt have a fantasy about involving bi guys in their sex life is written off as narrow minded?
Its not just about a fuck it is all about imagination and, I say again, fantasy.
The op should stick to his principles about openly declaring himself to be bi. That way he will have a chance to meet people who actually share his fantasy."
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'd much rather meet a bi man than someone in denial or blatantly dishonest. Wear your sexuality with pride. Loads of singles and very atractive couples are specifically searching for bi guys, so it's madness to shut that window of opportunity. If I was bi and someone didn't want to meet me because of my sexuality then I'd rather not meet them anyway. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rx1Couple
over a year ago
Torridge area of Devon |
Think it all comes down to a bit of integrity and honesty. If you are Bi or Straight why not be honest.
Lots of Guys Profiles on here Show they are Straight, but looking for TV's ?
Lots have been verified by other guys (some go into details) but still claim they are Straight.
Is is really about sexuality ? or is it about not being honest ?
If we look at any profile and things dont add up, we simply are not interested.
No different from a Guy showing facial hair, but claim to be clean shaven
or Non Smokers, but have pictures with Ciggies.
Honesty works better. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You are stuck between a rock and a hard place..Your call.However you play it,people will block you, but don't be bullied into the decision.Bi/Gay and Straight can overlap and sometimes its as clear as mud..
You could always have two profiles..
Perhaps I can help you understand the previous post by rephrasing it.
You could always lie and open a straight profile.
That sort of attitude is exactly why fab is getting to be so shit. Too many people who will justify any level of dishonesty if it means they get a shag.
And unbelievably it is honest people who chose not to meet bi guys who get abused as prejudiced and narrow minded. "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You are stuck between a rock and a hard place..Your call.However you play it,people will block you, but don't be bullied into the decision.Bi/Gay and Straight can overlap and sometimes its as clear as mud..
You could always have two profiles..
Perhaps I can help you understand the previous post by rephrasing it.
You could always lie and open a straight profile.
That sort of attitude is exactly why fab is getting to be so shit. Too many people who will justify any level of dishonesty if it means they get a shag.
And unbelievably it is honest people who chose not to meet bi guys who get abused as prejudiced and narrow minded.
"
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
What category does a straight guy fit into, if he says he's bi just to get to a wife? A couple I met said a guy even let the hubby suck him but wouldn't return the favour and was asked to leave.
And before anyone suggests so, even in jest, no it was not me who was asked to leave. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Is it really such a big deal that quite a number of 'straight' blokes on fabswingers have profiles on fabguys as 'bisexual'?
Can we not simply accept thats the way things are instead of getting 'het-up'(ha ha)& screaming about principles and honesty??
Clearly it is a big deal for some of you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?" No such thing as fab straight it’s so annoying , that is just guys that can be honest about there sexuality, and in my experience woman and couples are very much into it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?"
Please don't. It's deceptive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it really such a big deal that quite a number of 'straight' blokes on fabswingers have profiles on fabguys as 'bisexual'?
Can we not simply accept thats the way things are instead of getting 'het-up'(ha ha)& screaming about principles and honesty??
Clearly it is a big deal for some of you."
Funny thing with integrity isn't it? Some of us think it's actually a good quality. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *andom2chatMan
over a year ago
A Galaxy Far, Far Away & Spain |
An earlier thread I read was about some guys having two different profiles. One for when they only play for Str8 Meets, another for Bi. So it’s your choice on what you think offers you the best opportunities & what mood you’re in for playing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ampolCouple
over a year ago
Stevenage |
"Hi, I'm bi and comfortable with that, but increasingly I'm coming across a bias against bi men. I'm not sure why, but there we go. The question is, should I change my profile and go "fab straight"?"
We only meet bi guys, it’s funny the amount of straight guy’s message us and we say no as we want bi, and they then tell us they are bi but choose not too put it on there profile, if they had it in there profile and what we see we like then we would meet them..., if you are bi put it on there.. such a stigma. Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic