FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Wife got suspicious that I’m bi and went mad

Wife got suspicious that I’m bi and went mad

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I’m occasionally orally bi, I told her one night when I was d*unk and she went mad saying that we both needed to be tested ect, ( I’ve not done anything since we got married ) just wish I could be honest without losing her. Anyone been in the same situation ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What do you mean you haven’t done anything since you’ve been married? With men?

And sit her down and have a sober chat with her, if you feel she needs to know. Maybe get tested anyway? No harm in that at all, unless you pass some tests of course.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What do you mean you haven’t done anything since you’ve been married? With men?

And sit her down and have a sober chat with her, if you feel she needs to know. Maybe get tested anyway? No harm in that at all, unless you pass some tests of course. "

It’s only ever been oral, she would go mad, leave me, I only get the urge now and again :/

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By *uxom redCouple over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

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By *innie The MinxWoman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

You need to have an honest conversation with her. Not surprised she was shocked and angry.

Good luck x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

That saddens me to hear.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m occasionally orally bi, I told her one night when I was d*unk and she went mad saying that we both needed to be tested ect, ( I’ve not done anything since we got married ) just wish I could be honest without losing her. Anyone been in the same situation ? "

No cos my wife was bi and swung with me. No secrets they'll bite you.

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Be honest with her, don't make any bones about how you feel about guys and lay it all on the table. It's going to be hard for her to hear but in order to move on she needs to hear it.

As for how to keep her? I would say that you can't make anyone do anything, if she wants to be with you then she will. However she will need time to take all of this in and to process.

Just be direct and honest, that's the only way forwards now

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Yes I agree completely.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does she know you have a profile here?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"That saddens me to hear."

Why ? X

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

She was shocked and surprised. Talk to her again but don't hide anything.

You can catch ST Is from oral by the way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Does she know you have a profile here?"
she does but thinks I don’t really use it x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"She was shocked and surprised. Talk to her again but don't hide anything.

You can catch ST Is from oral by the way."

I know I can, I used to only play with married guys so I’m a weird way it was few and far between x

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

When did you get married?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?"

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"When did you get married?"

2013

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact "

With your wife?

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact "

And expect your wife to join in, despite it not being her thing and keeping it secret from her?

No sympathy here I'm afraid.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"When did you get married?

2013"

Oh ok so you are on here and looking for meets/having meets with her consent?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

With your wife? "

Preferably x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

With your wife?

Preferably x"

How does she look like ? Do she have nice elbows?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

And expect your wife to join in, despite it not being her thing and keeping it secret from her?

No sympathy here I'm afraid. "

It’s something I’ve imagined for nearly 20’years,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

And expect your wife to join in, despite it not being her thing and keeping it secret from her?

No sympathy here I'm afraid.

It’s something I’ve imagined for nearly 20’years, "

But if she doesn’t want it you need to respect that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can't help you with any personal experience but I'll tell you this... you can forget about all that honesty bullshite because if you tell your wife that you desire to suck another man's cock it's OVER pal! Maybe not immediately but the seed of the tree of devil-headed fruit will be planted and there is no uprooting it. The thing you must focus on is the fact that you have never been unfaithful to her and if you plan on continuing being faithful then it's not like you're missing out on life. Do not do any confessions and do not admit to enjoying something that you don't plan on doing anyway. If however you cannot stay married to her and not do bi oral then it's clear that it won't work and you'll only be confirming it by being open. But if it's a case of you never wanting to do those things then I promise you, do not tell her! There will be nothing to gain!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This is the wife that's doesn't know you're on here, that you want her to try another man but she doesn't?

Seriously I think you have never actually been honest with her ... so my feelings actually are for her!!! I hope she finds out all the truth and gets to see your posts on here so she knows that you also talk about her behind her back with total strangers!!!

Sort your relationship out and try being honest because she deserves so much better than You!!

My first rant posting now obliterate me please

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

And expect your wife to join in, despite it not being her thing and keeping it secret from her?

No sympathy here I'm afraid.

It’s something I’ve imagined for nearly 20’years, "

It's easy for me to say but shouldn't the topic have been brought up when you met her then?

It's hard for people to understand the absolute knife through the heat pain of finding out your OH has another life of some kind

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Dreadful. Have the locks been changed?

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"The thing you must focus on is the fact that you have never been unfaithful to her "

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"It's hard for people to understand the absolute knife through the heat pain of finding out your OH has another life of some kind

*heart

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan over a year ago

Halifax

This the same wife you are trying to coerce in to swinging from your previous thread? Got to love the green arrow.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The thing you must focus on is the fact that you have never been unfaithful to her

That's an adulterated and incomplete quote so it's not my statement but yours.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

you should of told her when you met.U knew my ex husband was bi less than 2 weeks after we met. Well i told him hecwas by and he said yes. Then we chatted about it. Now what you goingvto do since youve hidden your real self from her. Id have gone mad if my husband had hidden part of himself from me

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By *evaquitCouple over a year ago

Catthorpe

"This the same wife you are trying to coerce in to swinging from your previous thread? Got to love the green arrow. "

Car crash stuff! Got me thinking myths and legends tbh.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The thing you must focus on is the fact that you have never been unfaithful to her

Ohh wait a minute.. I see! I just read that he has been sucking cock. Oh well, there goes that! You're fucked pal.

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Can't help you with any personal experience but I'll tell you this... you can forget about all that honesty bullshite because if you tell your wife that you desire to suck another man's cock it's OVER pal! Maybe not immediately but the seed of the tree of devil-headed fruit will be planted and there is no uprooting it. The thing you must focus on is the fact that you have never been unfaithful to her and if you plan on continuing being faithful then it's not like you're missing out on life. Do not do any confessions and do not admit to enjoying something that you don't plan on doing anyway. If however you cannot stay married to her and not do bi oral then it's clear that it won't work and you'll only be confirming it by being open. But if it's a case of you never wanting to do those things then I promise you, do not tell her! There will be nothing to gain! "

Are you actually serious with this?

He's already let the cat out of the bag, honesty is the only choice now.

Also he has been unfaithful.

OP are you planning on keeping that lady that you met secret too?

Sorry, I'm out on this.

Your whole OP seems to be about manipulating the situation where you get to keep her with minimal impact and minimal need to spill.

You seem intent on keeping your secrets, irrespective of the hurt it causes to your wife

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By *essysteveCouple over a year ago

ALICANTE AREA SPAIN

When Ness and I first met - I was open with her about swinging and the bi side of things - she is fine with this providing that when we play with others it is always together and we have a wonderful life without any secrets

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Think OP is a bit of a fantasy writer

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well my Mrs knew I was bi ... cos a guy she worked with told her I'd sucked him off when I was leathered one night

She said two things to me:

1. Cheating is cheating. It doesn't matter whether it's a woman or another bloke.

2. If you want to sleep with guys, do it. I don't want to be the person that stops you being you

We stayed together for a few years after that as a proper couple and for longer as effectively 'just good friends'

I was never unfaithful, but whilst that night didn't finish our relationship, it was certainly never the same again

Good Luck to you both

I hope you come out the other side of this a stronger couple

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"The thing you must focus on is the fact that you have never been unfaithful to her

Ohh wait a minute.. I see! I just read that he has been sucking cock. Oh well, there goes that! You're fucked pal. "

And meeting couples

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Are you actually serious with this?

He's already let the cat out of the bag, honesty is the only choice now.

Also he has been unfaithful.

OP are you planning on keeping that lady that you met secret too?

Sorry, I'm out on this.

Your whole OP seems to be about manipulating the situation where you get to keep her with minimal impact and minimal need to spill.

You seem intent on keeping your secrets, irrespective of the hurt it causes to your wife"

Yeah I agree. My previous comment is null and voided and I retract it after reading that he actually has been unfaithful. If he had just had an idea or fetish that he didn't have to fulfil that's one thing, but he's been sucking cock behind his wife's back. And making it out that she's freaking about him being Bi. She's freaking because you've been CHEATING OP

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By *mumaWoman over a year ago

Livingston

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!!

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan over a year ago

Halifax

"Think OP is a bit of a fantasy writer

Yep. Proper Jackonary stuff. Should be posting in the Stories and Fantasy section.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Are you actually serious with this?

He's already let the cat out of the bag, honesty is the only choice now.

Also he has been unfaithful.

OP are you planning on keeping that lady that you met secret too?

Sorry, I'm out on this.

Your whole OP seems to be about manipulating the situation where you get to keep her with minimal impact and minimal need to spill.

You seem intent on keeping your secrets, irrespective of the hurt it causes to your wife

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you lie like cheap Japanese watch

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!! "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Are you actually serious with this?

He's already let the cat out of the bag, honesty is the only choice now.

Also he has been unfaithful.

OP are you planning on keeping that lady that you met secret too?

Sorry, I'm out on this.

Your whole OP seems to be about manipulating the situation where you get to keep her with minimal impact and minimal need to spill.

You seem intent on keeping your secrets, irrespective of the hurt it causes to your wife

What about your last meet verification?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!! "

A blowjob is still cheating OP.

But anyway - tell your wife the truth. About everything. Would you rather she found out elsewhere?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm with everyone here, bi or straight or gay. Cheating is cheating, you've hidden this from your wife for so long and expected to get sympathy from a site in which the lifestyle is where openness and honesty rules.

No sympathy for you, just your wife and anyone caught in your Web.

On another note, what is the green arrow? I've seen it tons of times on here but never clocked on to it

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!!

A blowjob is still cheating OP.

But anyway - tell your wife the truth. About everything. Would you rather she found out elsewhere?"
can’t see how she will

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Are you actually serious with this?

He's already let the cat out of the bag, honesty is the only choice now.

Also he has been unfaithful.

OP are you planning on keeping that lady that you met secret too?

Sorry, I'm out on this.

Your whole OP seems to be about manipulating the situation where you get to keep her with minimal impact and minimal need to spill.

You seem intent on keeping your secrets, irrespective of the hurt it causes to your wife

What about your last meet verification?"

This.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm with everyone here, bi or straight or gay. Cheating is cheating, you've hidden this from your wife for so long and expected to get sympathy from a site in which the lifestyle is where openness and honesty rules.

No sympathy for you, just your wife and anyone caught in your Web.

On another note, what is the green arrow? I've seen it tons of times on here but never clocked on to it "

So you can see what other forum threads they have been involved in.Try it you might like it

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

Maybe the OP is one of those people that likes being told off and feel bad?

Let's not fuel the fire

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!!

A blowjob is still cheating OP.

But anyway - tell your wife the truth. About everything. Would you rather she found out elsewhere?

can’t see how she will "

Well you’ve already gotten d*unk and told her you’re bi...

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By *mumaWoman over a year ago

Livingston

Are you actually serious with this?

He's already let the cat out of the bag, honesty is the only choice now.

Also he has been unfaithful.

OP are you planning on keeping that lady that you met secret too?

Sorry, I'm out on this.

Your whole OP seems to be about manipulating the situation where you get to keep her with minimal impact and minimal need to spill.

You seem intent on keeping your secrets, irrespective of the hurt it causes to your wife

Being on here and having meets without your wife's knowledge is still cheating!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!!

A blowjob is still cheating OP.

But anyway - tell your wife the truth. About everything. Would you rather she found out elsewhere?

can’t see how she will

Well you’ve already gotten d*unk and told her you’re bi..."

Yeah guilt is a funny thing, you may be fine with the fact that you think that she won't find out anymore. But didn't think you would d*unkenly tell her in the first place did you?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do you really have a wife OP or is this just some fantasy stuff??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"She's freaking because you've been CHEATING OP

Read it properly, I’ve done nothing since we’ve been together"

Ok, for the sake of stupidity let's say I believed you... My advice then stands... Do not think about telling your wife that you enjoy sucking cock unless you know that you cannot refrain and be faithful. In this case, you are doing the honorable thing by telling her and allowing her to decide (and you must be prepared for it to end because it most likely will). But if you have been faithful and will remain so and you are going to have a discussion and confess this... your marriage is OVER! I promise you that. Probably already is by the sound of it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe the OP is one of those people that likes being told off and feel bad?

Let's not fuel the fire

Thats more believable than the actual stories to be fair.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Do you really have a wife OP or is this just some fantasy stuff??

Used that lovely green arrow. Yeah this is all fantasy. Either that or he is trying to create a string of posts to show his wife when he gets into bother and expects everyone to offer heartfelt advice

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By *irtySekretsCouple over a year ago

Filthy Desires Upon Trent

The OP has Posted several different Threads within the space of a few hours.

What a crock of Shit. And Jackanory

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

He has a verification from September so he has already been unfaithful!!!

A blowjob is still cheating OP.

But anyway - tell your wife the truth. About everything. Would you rather she found out elsewhere? can’t see how she will "

You said she knows you're here but doesn't think you use it, what does she think you do? Maybe she'll get curious, would it be that hard for her to find your profile, or these posts and recognise they're about her?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You need to have an honest conversation with her. Not surprised she was shocked and angry.

Good luck x"

Given that he hasn't acted on anything since they have been together in not certain it was necessarily any of her business until such a time as he felt comfortable sharing it with her.

Would anyone on this site be implying his wife were in the wrong if he went apeshit because she told him she played with some girls before they met?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You need to have an honest conversation with her. Not surprised she was shocked and angry.

Good luck x

Given that he hasn't acted on anything since they have been together in not certain it was necessarily any of her business until such a time as he felt comfortable sharing it with her.

Would anyone on this site be implying his wife were in the wrong if he went apeshit because she told him she played with some girls before they met? "

Read his other posts (wants her to try another man but she doesn't want to) and the fact that he's on here and cheated behind her back with another woman already plus talks about her behind her back with strangers ... I'm sure she'll be one happy bunny

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By *oyboy101Man over a year ago

ilford

The OP I guess was looking for sympathy for his philandering ways...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP has Posted several different Threads within the space of a few hours.

What a crock of Shit. And Jackanory

There’s more of these, the days I get to read a genuine question on here is rare.

I’m off to the hot or not thread.....

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"You need to have an honest conversation with her. Not surprised she was shocked and angry.

Good luck x

Given that he hasn't acted on anything since they have been together in not certain it was necessarily any of her business until such a time as he felt comfortable sharing it with her.

Would anyone on this site be implying his wife were in the wrong if he went apeshit because she told him she played with some girls before they met? "

He has met people since they've been together though

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You need to have an honest conversation with her. Not surprised she was shocked and angry.

Good luck x

Given that he hasn't acted on anything since they have been together in not certain it was necessarily any of her business until such a time as he felt comfortable sharing it with her.

Would anyone on this site be implying his wife were in the wrong if he went apeshit because she told him she played with some girls before they met?

He has met people since they've been together though "

Ah ok, well I was taking his post at face value. If he's been playing away then it's different

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

and here was I, responding in good faith

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"and here was I, responding in good faith

Genuinely think what you like guys, I’m genuine and very open minded.

I’m married

We have spoke about mmf

Yes I genuinely believe she has done something else.

I’m under no obligation to put all of that in one post, why can’t I mix it up ? Perhaps a few ( not all of the doubters ) are actually just on here wank !

I can prove I’m genuine

Can they ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"and here was I, responding in good faith

Genuinely think what you like guys, I’m genuine and very open minded.

I’m married

We have spoke about mmf

Yes I genuinely believe she has done something else.

I’m under no obligation to put all of that in one post, why can’t I mix it up ? Perhaps a few ( not all of the doubters ) are actually just on here wank !

I can prove I’m genuine

Can they ? "

Can you prove you are genuine though. There is a lot of holes on your story. You can't fill holes then you definitely don't belong here

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"and here was I, responding in good faith

Genuinely think what you like guys, I’m genuine and very open minded.

I’m married

We have spoke about mmf

Yes I genuinely believe she has done something else.

I’m under no obligation to put all of that in one post, why can’t I mix it up ? Perhaps a few ( not all of the doubters ) are actually just on here wank !

Haha yes I can, to both that is x

I can prove I’m genuine

Can they ?

Can you prove you are genuine though. There is a lot of holes on your story. You can't fill holes then you definitely don't belong here

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By *olfAndKittenCouple over a year ago

Bristol

Hmmmm with you wanting your wife to fuck other men, you sucking other men and your wish for your wife to of fucked your mate...

You have gone from sounding controlling and manipulative to someone who acts and doesn't think with a head full of ideas like a dog chasing cars.

Personally I'd suggest taking time away from here and actually focusing on your marriage rather than extra fun on the side... If you do want your marriage to work stop hiding on here, log out and out some effort into it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hmmmm with you wanting your wife to fuck other men, you sucking other men and your wish for your wife to of fucked your mate...

You have gone from sounding controlling and manipulative to someone who acts and doesn't think with a head full of ideas like a dog chasing cars.

^^^ THIS

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"and here was I, responding in good faith

Genuinely think what you like guys, I’m genuine and very open minded.

I’m married

We have spoke about mmf

Yes I genuinely believe she has done something else.

I’m under no obligation to put all of that in one post, why can’t I mix it up ? Perhaps a few ( not all of the doubters ) are actually just on here wank !

Haha yes I can, to both that is x

I can prove I’m genuine

Can they ?

Can you prove you are genuine though. There is a lot of holes on your story. You can't fill holes then you definitely don't belong here

Well I don't have anything to prove to you as I care about other's feelings, try never to be dishonest to those I love and have never cheated

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By *olfAndKittenCouple over a year ago

Bristol

So you claim your wife knows about you being on here and doesn't act on it... That should set bloody alarm bells ringing for a start!

So many things wrong with every post made and counter arguments you have come up with.

Swinging is based on trust pure and simple! So far you have shown disregard for your wife, a casual attitude which is disrespectful, A disregard for others opinions if they don't match yours and generally quite controlling and obnoxious.

Chances are I will get a forum ban for this but sod it....its men who act like this give the decent men a hard time because women get treated like crap, take it and men like yourself do a lot of untold damage to someone you claim to care about! Leaving those genuine blokes standing in the wind taking flak because rather than do what's right, you do what you want and sod the rest.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hmmmm with you wanting your wife to fuck other men, you sucking other men and your wish for your wife to of fucked your mate...

You have gone from sounding controlling and manipulative to someone who acts and doesn't think with a head full of ideas like a dog chasing cars.

^^^ THIS

Plus one for this

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan over a year ago

Halifax

"and here was I, responding in good faith

Genuinely think what you like guys, I’m genuine and very open minded.

I’m married

We have spoke about mmf

Yes I genuinely believe she has done something else.

I’m under no obligation to put all of that in one post, why can’t I mix it up ? Perhaps a few ( not all of the doubters ) are actually just on here wank !

Haha yes I can, to both that is x

I can prove I’m genuine

Can they ?

Can you prove you are genuine though. There is a lot of holes on your story. You can't fill holes then you definitely don't belong here

Still cant get the hang of the reply&qoute thing can you.

Think you will find 95% of people who have replied have multiple verifications from actually meeting people.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"and here was I, responding in good faith

Genuinely think what you like guys, I’m genuine and very open minded.

I’m married

We have spoke about mmf

Yes I genuinely believe she has done something else.

I’m under no obligation to put all of that in one post, why can’t I mix it up ? Perhaps a few ( not all of the doubters ) are actually just on here wank !

I can prove I’m genuine

Can they ? "

Behave

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Set her free now. As I see it you have three options :

1. Tell her and she's upset but willing to work on the relationship incorporating your needs.

2. Tell her and she goes batshit but this charade of a relationship is over.

3. Keep on a you are, imprisoning her in a world of lies, stealing her life from her, waiting for her to figure it out and resent you forever.

Honesty is the best, if painful, policy. I've been her. Poor woman. Cheating is cheating, as other's have said.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Her reaction is why men keep it a secret.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Every day on fab makes me happy I'm not in a relationship

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Am I the only that thinks he doesn't have a wife and this is just made up fantasy?

Not that it really matters

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Think OP is a bit of a fantasy writer

I was just thinking similar

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP I guess was looking for sympathy for his philandering ways..."

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Every day on fab makes me happy I'm not in a relationship

Every day on fab makes me miserable and I'm not in a relationship.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does your wife know you are on here?? Try telling her that. Then watch her get mad.

Why do men lie??

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does your wife know you are on here?? Try telling her that. Then watch her get mad.

Why do men lie??"

not all men lie

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does your wife know you are on here?? Try telling her that. Then watch her get mad.

Why do men lie??

not all men lie

No not ALL men. But a lot of them. This op is clearly another fantasist with a sad little life who is running a parallel one alongside, fuelled by secrets and lies

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does your wife know you are on here?? Try telling her that. Then watch her get mad.

Why do men lie??

not all men lie

No not ALL men. But a lot of them. This op is clearly another fantasist with a sad little life who is running a parallel one alongside, fuelled by secrets and lies"

oh yeah, the OP here is a complete fantasist

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By *carlettxWoman over a year ago

Essex

"Does she know you have a profile here? she does but thinks I don’t really use it x "

But does she know that you are meeting women on here too ? I mean just cos she knows you like to suck cock STI’s can be caught from any sex ??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Am I the only that thinks he doesn't have a wife and this is just made up fantasy?

Not that it really matters

He's clearly making it up and/or telling half-truths and contradicting himself. But the subject is beneficial and good enough to respond to.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

Reality check time

You want this life style your wife clearly doesn’t so youre simply not compatible as a couple time to cut ties and move on so you can both find someone that wants the same things as you, that way you can both live a happier life

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

So he's lit the touch paper and ran off now to watch his own NY fireworks display!

I don't know if he's telling the truth about his situation or not, but ultimately the consensus is rather clear; come clean (if it's true)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My boyfriend got suspicious I’m straight when I kept trying to air grab boobs in my sleep.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/01/19 09:37:25]

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Does she know you have a profile here? she does but thinks I don’t really use it x

But does she know that you are meeting women on here too ? I mean just cos she knows you like to suck cock STI’s can be caught from any sex ?? "

It's the blooding heart "woe is me" posting, trying to get sympathy for the mess he's made that's provoked my ire.

The words 'bed' and 'lie in it' spring to mind!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

An ex thought I was bi because I wanted to try anal. On her obviously if it was on me I'd see her point

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By *igJandTheBlondeCouple over a year ago

Kings Hill

"She's freaking because you've been CHEATING OP

Read it properly, I’ve done nothing since we’ve been together

You can’t promise him his marriage is over, you might have some experience but different people react different ways. He wants something (if the story is true) that his wife cannot give him, if he’s sensitive when talking about his wants he could explain it without causing hurt. It’s absolutely not about her, it’s about him.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Am I the only that thinks he doesn't have a wife and this is just made up fantasy?

Not that it really matters

He's clearly making it up and/or telling half-truths and contradicting himself. But the subject is beneficial and good enough to respond to. "

That’s right, We can only answer the questions put in front of us.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"When Ness and I first met - I was open with her about swinging and the bi side of things - she is fine with this providing that when we play with others it is always together and we have a wonderful life without any secrets "

Sounds perfect to me,enjoy eachother, enjoy others but always together, with total trust... I’d love to find that in life.. you are Blessed xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Her reaction is why men keep it a secret. "

Thank you, I’d love nothing more than to tell her.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So he's lit the touch paper and ran off now to watch his own NY fireworks display!

I don't know if he's telling the truth about his situation or not, but ultimately the consensus is rather clear; come clean (if it's true) "

Come clean if he wants to see other people. If he's just hiding that he likes men, but isn't going to act on it I don't see why he has to tell anyone.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Her reaction is why men keep it a secret.

Thank you, I’d love nothing more than to tell her. "

Do you want to meet men while you're with her?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Her reaction is why men keep it a secret.

Thank you, I’d love nothing more than to tell her.

Do you want to meet men while you're with her?

"
if I’m honest I’d rather meet men with her

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Her reaction is why men keep it a secret.

Thank you, I’d love nothing more than to tell her.

Do you want to meet men while you're with her?

if I’m honest I’d rather meet men with her "

If she's appalled by you being bi, can you see her agreeing to that? Or enjoying it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I feel your Angst mate. It is hard to be Bi and have a girlfriend that isn't really into it.

For many of us males the sexual imperative burns very bright and temptations constantly come alone.

My advice is to only do it when she is present and willing and wank if the urge to do Bi stuff without her is strong. Go on cam or whatever, dress up on Cam, do whatever but do not destroy her trust in you. All you will do is build an almighty wall of resentment which may be impossible to knock down.

It's not worth it. unless doing Bi stuff is more important than your marriage.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Personally I'd be more pissed off that you felt you couldn't talk to me and tell me your bi.

I wouldn't have a problem if you we're honest with me.

If I found out you'd lied to me and met people behind my back then I'd be somewhat hurt and then angry.

Her reaction is why men keep it a secret.

Thank you, I’d love nothing more than to tell her.

Do you want to meet men while you're with her?

if I’m honest I’d rather meet men with her

If she's appalled by you being bi, can you see her agreeing to that? Or enjoying it?"

I wouldn’t say appalled, perhaps shocked as I’m a mans man if that term makes sense, I’m really not not sure if she would agree.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I feel your Angst mate. It is hard to be Bi and have a girlfriend that isn't really into it.

For many of us males the sexual imperative burns very bright and temptations constantly come alone.

It's not worth it. unless doing Bi stuff is more important than your marriage."

Thanks pal

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By *onnie And Clyde9070Couple over a year ago

Leeds

If she went mad at the thought of you being orally bi how will she react to you being on a swingers site and cheating on her?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If she went mad at the thought of you being orally bi how will she react to you being on a swingers site and cheating on her?"

^^^ THIS and she'll just think you want her to be with other men just for You! It has nothing to do with her at all! Just tell her you're cheating behind her back, discussing her with strangers behind her back, on a swingers site behind her back and you want her to try other men (even though she doesn't) because you're bi and you have lied to her all you relationship!! She'll love it I'm sure

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

She may well decide she doesn't want to come along for the journey, but after the initial shock has diminished, she MAY be happy for you to play as long as you are open and adhere to some ground rules.

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one "

Lol ... it's not just about that though is it? It's way more ...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sometimes honesty means we will lose someone we love. We can't force someone to accept us if we have changed from the person they married. It's like changing the Terms and conditions mid-contract. So some men and women get turned on by seeing their other halves with the same gender and others it will change how they see you forever in a negative way.

Better to be honest about who you are and have your integrity and not risk hurting the one you love any further by making a decision but we can't force someone to accept something they aren't into.

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By *ueen of sleezeWoman over a year ago

Yorkshire

Well I can speak from experience my hubby told me the same thing no biggie it lead to us having some Frank conversations and discussions but it fetched a new openness and respect that we hadn't had for a while.

After discussing it we decided openness was key which led us here and having the time of our lives.

Hope you have a much luck as we have had xxxx

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one "

I see your point to an extent and I agree with you in part. However for me, the tone of the OP and the details in it are littered with half truths and manipulative sentiment. This is a lesson, do that and you get burnt.

Had the OP been direct from the off then this thread would most likely have gone differently, people don't like to be lied to.

I think the OP needed to be told a few harsh truths, what he does with it now is up to him. I have a feeling though that he will do what he wants to anyway, it's clearly what he has been doing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Lol ... it's not just about that though is it? It's way more ... "

So, you're happy for the witch hunt to continue ?

To what end ?

Until the thread gets closed or wiped ?

Until the OP goes UNLOS ?

Until you've got off your chest whatever unresolved issues this thread has created for you ?

I just don't see the point

Either he is a fantasist in which case he will revel in the attention the post has created

Or he is a guy genuinely struggling with balancing his sexuality with his wanting of a 'normal' life

Some of us are further down that line than others

If we tried to understand their perspective (and that of those whose lives they are affecting) and impart some of our experience, maybe, just maybe, it could help them both

Or, alternatively, we can dismiss them as a fraud, a cheat, a liar, barrack them for such and push them further down the rabbit hole - which helps no one

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Lol ... it's not just about that though is it? It's way more ...

So, you're happy for the witch hunt to continue ?

To what end ?

Until the thread gets closed or wiped ?

Until the OP goes UNLOS ?

Until you've got off your chest whatever unresolved issues this thread has created for you ?

I just don't see the point

Either he is a fantasist in which case he will revel in the attention the post has created

Or he is a guy genuinely struggling with balancing his sexuality with his wanting of a 'normal' life

Some of us are further down that line than others

If we tried to understand their perspective (and that of those whose lives they are affecting) and impart some of our experience, maybe, just maybe, it could help them both

Or, alternatively, we can dismiss them as a fraud, a cheat, a liar, barrack them for such and push them further down the rabbit hole - which helps no one"

If this was his only post and only issue I'd support him totally. If he didn't keep contradicting himself, if he hadn't lied to his wife since he met her, if he didn't keep lying to her .... all this by his own admission

This is the only time I have actually got annoyed on fab!! He keeps changing his stories for attention ... it's a good fantasy or he is seriously fucking with another person's emotions let alone talking about her behind her back ... all for the poor me attention ffs it's nothing to do with being bi he said he was before he met her it's about deceit and lying ... its an ugly post

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Had the OP been direct from the off then this thread would most likely have gone differently, people don't like to be lied to.

I think the OP needed to be told a few harsh truths, what he does with it now is up to him. I have a feeling though that he will do what he wants to anyway, it's clearly what he has been doing"

I agree

I am not going to sit and defend one stranger to another

To that end, the OP has not helped himself here

I do find it hard, however, to sit back and watch someone get torn to shreds by a baying mob when what we might have is a very confused guy trying his best to do 'life'

It is the 'might' that has been enough to make me sit back and think more about what has been said.

It is as confused as it is confusing

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Lol ... it's not just about that though is it? It's way more ...

So, you're happy for the witch hunt to continue ?

To what end ?

Until the thread gets closed or wiped ?

Until the OP goes UNLOS ?

Until you've got off your chest whatever unresolved issues this thread has created for you ?

I just don't see the point

Either he is a fantasist in which case he will revel in the attention the post has created

Or he is a guy genuinely struggling with balancing his sexuality with his wanting of a 'normal' life

Some of us are further down that line than others

If we tried to understand their perspective (and that of those whose lives they are affecting) and impart some of our experience, maybe, just maybe, it could help them both

Or, alternatively, we can dismiss them as a fraud, a cheat, a liar, barrack them for such and push them further down the rabbit hole - which helps no one

Why is it annoying you? It doesn't affect your life does it?

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Had the OP been direct from the off then this thread would most likely have gone differently, people don't like to be lied to.

I think the OP needed to be told a few harsh truths, what he does with it now is up to him. I have a feeling though that he will do what he wants to anyway, it's clearly what he has been doing

I agree

I am not going to sit and defend one stranger to another

To that end, the OP has not helped himself here

I do find it hard, however, to sit back and watch someone get torn to shreds by a baying mob when what we might have is a very confused guy trying his best to do 'life'

It is the 'might' that has been enough to make me sit back and think more about what has been said.

It is as confused as it is confusing"

Bussy, you know how people treat men on single profiles on here, and bi men get it harder.

Imagine if this had been a woman who started this thread.

Reply privately (thread closed by moderator)

By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Lol ... it's not just about that though is it? It's way more ...

So, you're happy for the witch hunt to continue ?

To what end ?

Until the thread gets closed or wiped ?

Until the OP goes UNLOS ?

Until you've got off your chest whatever unresolved issues this thread has created for you ?

I just don't see the point

Either he is a fantasist in which case he will revel in the attention the post has created

Or he is a guy genuinely struggling with balancing his sexuality with his wanting of a 'normal' life

Some of us are further down that line than others

If we tried to understand their perspective (and that of those whose lives they are affecting) and impart some of our experience, maybe, just maybe, it could help them both

Or, alternatively, we can dismiss them as a fraud, a cheat, a liar, barrack them for such and push them further down the rabbit hole - which helps no one"

I think that we're all reflecting our own experiences on this thread. Whether it is being lied to or dealing with deception.

I was in a similar position to you. It wasn't until I was honest, accepted who I am and dealt with things directly that I was able to build a better life.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Being a bi woman on here gets pussies dripping and people complaining they can't find their unicorn.

Being a bi man gets those same pussies screaming about how filthy it is.

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Had the OP been direct from the off then this thread would most likely have gone differently, people don't like to be lied to.

I think the OP needed to be told a few harsh truths, what he does with it now is up to him. I have a feeling though that he will do what he wants to anyway, it's clearly what he has been doing

I agree

I am not going to sit and defend one stranger to another

To that end, the OP has not helped himself here

I do find it hard, however, to sit back and watch someone get torn to shreds by a baying mob when what we might have is a very confused guy trying his best to do 'life'

It is the 'might' that has been enough to make me sit back and think more about what has been said.

It is as confused as it is confusing

Bussy, you know how people treat men on single profiles on here, and bi men get it harder.

Imagine if this had been a woman who started this thread. "

In this case I disagree, I don't think gender bias has any bearing, it's the manipulative posting, half truths and attempt at martyrdom that has drawn the reactions. I've seen the same levelled at ladies too

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By *ea monkeyMan over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Being a bi woman on here gets pussies dripping and people complaining they can't find their unicorn.

Being a bi man gets those same pussies screaming about how filthy it is.

I'm a bi guy, I'm with you 100% on that point. I don't think that this is the point here though.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've never been annoyed by anything on fab before but this has annoyed me!! It's everything that is wrong with fab in one post and, like everyone else does at times, I had to say!! All this postulating to a, at best fantasist at worst a total liar and cheat (he was bi before he met her) has just made me angry and sad ... there are real people with these real dilemmas who are dealing with real issues ... but he thinks it ok to change his stories and lie ... pffft yes it has annoyed me and I have said so! Now you can obliterate me ...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being a bi woman on here gets pussies dripping and people complaining they can't find their unicorn.

Being a bi man gets those same pussies screaming about how filthy it is.

I'm a bi guy, I'm with you 100% on that point. I don't think that this is the point here though. "

No, but see what happens if a bi woman says the same thing. Even if she is lying.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being a bi woman on here gets pussies dripping and people complaining they can't find their unicorn.

Being a bi man gets those same pussies screaming about how filthy it is.

I'm a bi guy, I'm with you 100% on that point. I don't think that this is the point here though.

No, but see what happens if a bi woman says the same thing. Even if she is lying."

Any liars on fab regardless if they are female bi or male bi get bought down mob style lol. The green arrow catches so many fantascists and dishonest people out.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Stop attacking people when you post. There are ways of questioning a post if you don't believe it without attacking the person when doing it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being a bi woman on here gets pussies dripping and people complaining they can't find their unicorn.

Being a bi man gets those same pussies screaming about how filthy it is.

I'm a bi guy, I'm with you 100% on that point. I don't think that this is the point here though.

No, but see what happens if a bi woman says the same thing. Even if she is lying.

Any liars on fab regardless if they are female bi or male bi get bought down mob style lol. The green arrow catches so many fantascists and dishonest people out. "

If she isn't lying she'll still be treated better than a bi man.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Bussy I think I wuv you. Your posts and empathy on this thread make great reading

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Bussy I think I wuv you. Your posts and empathy on this thread make great reading "

Agreed

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

"Bussy I think I wuv you. Your posts and empathy on this thread make great reading

Agreed"

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By *orthyorkypairCouple over a year ago

North Yorkshire

"I've just had a look at your other threads op.

What exactly is your intent?

To have a bi mmf orally bi to be exact

And expect your wife to join in, despite it not being her thing and keeping it secret from her?

No sympathy here I'm afraid. "

nor here!

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By *orthyorkypairCouple over a year ago

North Yorkshire

"Bussy I think I wuv you. Your posts and empathy on this thread make great reading "

he got no sympathy from us lol xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You’re not even honest about your sexuality on your profile

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By *onnie And Clyde9070Couple over a year ago

Leeds

"Fuckin 'ell people, give the guy a break

Fantasist or cheat or liar, you're going in a bit strong here folks

IF what he is saying IS true, he is not in an easy place

I tortured myself for years about my sexuality - and it took me even longer to deal with it. Some days I realise I still haven't.

Maybe back off with the burning torches just a little and show some consideration to what he is saying and why he is here and why he may use the site for fantasist purposes

When you are trying to sort out the mess in your head, you need clarity of thought, support, guidance, not scenes akin to The Wicker Man

However OP, SOME of what is being said to you is relevant

Perhaps being here isn't the best place for you now. It is maybe making your feelings stronger and the life choices you have to make more difficult for the added confusion.

You need to deal with your sexuality both internally and with your wife as a couple

Either way, carry on with her full knowledge, or part as friends and have a chance of building lives for each other.

If you love her like you say you do, you will need to respect her choices as much as she will need to respect yours.

And with that, I think I'm out with this one

Lol ... it's not just about that though is it? It's way more ... "

If he's not in an easy place he only has himself to blame because he put himself firmly in that place. He's cheated and lied and now he's all woe me.

How about we consider his poor wife and the awful place she's in because of him. And she doesn't even know half of the story.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And shes not upset you have a single profile on here with no mention of her..what a load of bollocks you are spouting fella

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Bussy I think I wuv you. "

You had me at fig roll x

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By *bonynivoryCouple over a year ago

market harborough

I guess she'll be even more bothered when she finds you're on here.

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By *onnie And Clyde9070Couple over a year ago

Leeds

I guess she'll be even more bothered when she finds you're on here. "

And not for the first time. He's a return member.

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By *aughtybutniceBBWWoman over a year ago

The County of Northamptonshire

"It's hard for people to understand the absolute knife through the heat pain of finding out your OH has another life of some kind

Just this

Talking from personal experience

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By *egs11ABCWoman over a year ago

Aberdeen

"Every day on fab makes me happy I'm not in a relationship

Just what I was thinking. Been reading the comments with interest as i found out my husband was sleeping with young guys when i was in hospital giving birth to my daughter 28years ago. I can't begin to explain the hurt and humiliation i felt amd al otmof peoole on here sean to think she should accept him but she married a "straight" man so the shock must be immense x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What do you mean you haven’t done anything since you’ve been married? With men?

And sit her down and have a sober chat with her, if you feel she needs to know. Maybe get tested anyway? No harm in that at all, unless you pass some tests of course. "

Well he is friends with a 22yr old guy...

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By *teveanddebsCouple over a year ago

Norwich

What really grips my shit about threads like this is the idea that being bi gives a person some sort of licence to cheat.

Newsflash:

It's not compulsory.

It is perfectly possible to be attracted to someone, male or female and not do anything about it.

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By *olfAndKittenCouple over a year ago

Bristol

Bussy the op has made several different posts on several large topics in each one he has clearly come across in a negative aspect.

IF this is all real then the op still should walk away from here and actually take time out of life to assess who he really is, what he really wants and the best ways to achieve it.

He also needs to actually be open with his wife about all of this. Sit down and talk, get it all out in the open and work together.

The more someone runs in circles the more nauseated they become which starts a negative cycle which in turn will bring feels of doubt which then turn to depressive thoughts.

Now with lots of contradictions over various posts it's hard to actually get a feel of what is happening IRL away from here.

My advice would still be the same..

Step back from fab

Take time to assess what he wants

Be open with his wife!

Maybe even look at counselling to help reason with his wants.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign "

Wow that's massively homophobic. Way to bring it down cave man

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Bussy the op has made several different posts on several large topics in each one he has clearly come across in a negative aspect.

IF this is all real then the op still should walk away from here and actually take time out of life to assess who he really is, what he really wants and the best ways to achieve it.

He also needs to actually be open with his wife about all of this. Sit down and talk, get it all out in the open and work together.

The more someone runs in circles the more nauseated they become which starts a negative cycle which in turn will bring feels of doubt which then turn to depressive thoughts.

Now with lots of contradictions over various posts it's hard to actually get a feel of what is happening IRL away from here.

My advice would still be the same..

Step back from fab

Take time to assess what he wants

Be open with his wife!

Maybe even look at counselling to help reason with his wants.

I echo all your advice

He has a lot to deal with

As does his wife

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Every day on fab makes me happy I'm not in a relationship

I am not underestimating your grief, or trying to

Some guys find it easy to be themselves

Others don't

Some try to live conventional lives

Of those that do, some are better at handling it than others

It is a total head fuck

You ache with every bone in your body to be 'normal'

You think it will go away if you buy into that life that you want so badly

You want the wife, the kids, the happy family. You want to make your parents happy, your brothers and sisters Aunties & Uncles

You want to be able to be affectionate with the person you love in public

You don't want to carry round the constant burden of guilt that every day provides afresh

You don't want that feeling of revulsion you feel when your mind wanders or your eye wanders to that guy in the bar

You don't want that feeling of panic mixed with excitement when he catches your eye back and you wonder if anyone else has seen it

To an outsider, this can be seen as selfish and self indulgent

I didn't set out to hurt anyone

I tried to be normal

I wanted all the things my mates had

Imagine being denied that by something that you learn that you can't control

I grieve for the life I wanted but could never have

I learned to live with it

I made mistakes along the way

There is no guide book

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign "

If you were a woman? Well I'm a woman and I don't think like that. It's weird how we all have our own mind's isn't it.

So you obviously don't do anal with a woman then I presume?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign "

That sounds exactly the immature shite I used to say to my 16yr old mates to make them laugh. ...

We all grew up though. Thank goodness.

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign "

Some women have been around the block a lot more you know

My Mr is Bi and I couldn’t give two hoots about it - whatever makes him happy

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By *rkeb3Man over a year ago

east Lancashire road

If u love her don't tell her now

Tell her it was a joke n get tested and then after u can tell her on the right time

Don't listen to anyone say be honest u can't tell to some one n make them blieve its okay to cheat n with men who's against all of that

This is hard u should do what's best for you

But I got a good feeling she won't be with u if u come clean now

Only few people would understand ur situation don't think she's one of them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign "

Oh dear

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign

Some women have been around the block a lot more you know

Thank you, angers me that people doubt I’m genuine, if I can’t come clean to strangers I’ve never or am likely to meet then what chance do I have

My Mr is Bi and I couldn’t give two hoots about it - whatever makes him happy

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign

Oh dear

However I’m orally bi, ( perhaps should have stated that )

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan over a year ago

Halifax

no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

Were you d*unk when you typed this?

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By *ihimbiherCouple over a year ago

lightwater

Blimie!

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By *ophieslutTV/TS over a year ago

Central

In one day or so, the op has had his wife taxi his mate home, possibly get fucked and come up, going straight in to the shower. Plus also they've had discussions of her having other men, in a separate thread.

Then there's this one, where the relationship is threatened, due to him having gay sex.

I think the summing up of it all, is that if they embark on improving their communication and honesty, they'll discover what they're really wanting. We've only got his side on this though - as there's no couples' profile etc. Maybe it's all in his mind?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"In one day or so, the op has had his wife taxi his mate home, possibly get fucked and come up, going straight in to the shower. Plus also they've had discussions of her having other men, in a separate thread.

Then there's this one, where the relationship is threatened, due to him having gay sex.

I think the summing up of it all, is that if they embark

on improving their communication and honesty, they'll discover what they're really wanting. We've only got his side on this though - as there's no couples' profile etc. Maybe it's all in his mind?"
or maybe not, perhaps I’m expressing through many channels, I hopes some would understand, I didn’t prepare myself for the barrage of abuse, I won’t be posting again.

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By *aznlouCouple over a year ago

co durham

But she doesn’t mind you playing with other women? Well from the looks of your veris anyway

We’ve always been honest with each other from meeting as single people to being a couple.

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By *anDare70Man over a year ago

kirkby

"I agree with the wife

If I were a woman I for sure would be having no bi mam I'm my pussy or mouth or anywhere near me

If be constantly thinking. ... this has or may have been somewhere that should be exit only an have a no entry sign

That sounds exactly the immature shite I used to say to my 16yr old mates to make them laugh. ...

We all grew up though. Thank goodness. "
??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

my ex met men behind my back.it ended our marriage when i found out.

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