FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Unwanted friend requests?!
Unwanted friend requests?!
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So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text 
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss 
xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's fine
Your not breaking any rules
If you don't want a friends request just decline and block .
Half the pics in folks private galley have loads of fabs already anyway where theyve been on display in public
We all different but the issue of a friend invite certainly wouldn't or dosent bother me ..
Some people state it's the height of ignorance or rudeness
There's a lot lot worse than asking I'd you'd like to be a friend .
What's rude about it ?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
Absolutely fine! If they haven't taken the time to read all your profile and just decide to add you then that's their fault! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
No we all do it |
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Its not cheeky, its called managing your account. Unlikely that anyone is just going to accept an unknown person/couple as a friend without some sort of interaction first. Like you I only add as a friend once we've met. When all the unsolicited friend requests come in I always look through the profile of the requester just to find out about them and sometimes it has resulted in further dialogue and even a few meets. I always presume the requester is doing so because they have an interest in you. I never block people just because of the unsolicited request, I only do that if they become a pest or abusive when the request is not accepted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't delete any unwanted friend request, that way they can't resend "
Thats a good idea, I hadn't thought of that. I got loads, I don't understand why as I don't have any friends only photos. So not sure what they expect to achieve. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
Yes I think it is a tad cheeky since you said "no exceptions" but then added them anyway so that you could look at their private gallery and then quickly removed them again so they could not look at yours....
But does it matter "no" not really so carry on. It could be argued that they chose to send the friend request when they knew it would be rejected...or even more of a sin, did not read the profile in the first place! There is no forgiveness for not reading the profile in my book. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
We do the same, if they've given you the opportunity to look may as well take them up on it  xx
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
that's what they do to you so it's fair I'd say |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone sends me a friend request out of nowhere I do not accept and leave it there. That way they can't keep sending requests if you delete it. "
People repeat sending unsolicited friends requests? At least you know they must be idiots or unhealthily optimistic!
Mike xx |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
I specifically say I will do this in my profile, which actually gets me even more friends requests, I think they believe I'll be swayed when I see their friends pics. So mostly I just ignore them now, I'll have the odd peek/delete session though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We just block them. Whether they haven't read our profile or they have but don't care, it means that our requirements are low on their list - certainly below "getting their end away".
We think it is a useful test of how people will be in real life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone sends me a friend request out of nowhere I do not accept and leave it there. That way they can't keep sending requests if you delete it.
People repeat sending unsolicited friends requests? At least you know they must be idiots or unhealthily optimistic!
Mike xx"
Or can't read.... |
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I don't accept friend requests from people I've never chatted to, or met.
It's on my profile but I still get at least 50 a day.
I just presume they want to nose my friends only pics, they'd be disappointed. There's nothing 'exciting' in there.
Everything in thst album has been public at some point, just moved as its an old pic & I've added new ones.
Leave the requests unanswered. |
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By *rx1Couple
over a year ago
North Devon-ish |
90% of pictures in peoples private galleries are exactly the same as their public profile pictures.
Most are only interested in seeing what you have in there.
Ours show our faces, so like the OP we have a crafty look, when they are off line. If theirs are non facial pictures we just delete and block.
If by some rare chance they do contain facial pictures and we are interested we accept and message them, so they can see us.
If it is just a random invite without a message, we just block anyway |
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By *erby DomCouple
over a year ago
Ashbourne(ish) and Chesterfield(ish) |
We used to just delete them as we never thought about just leaving them there so that they can't resend a request.
I think it is a bit cheeky to justs end a friend request out of the blue, it just shows us that you are only interested in perving at out pics. |
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We do not consider it friendly to send people a friends request when you have never had any contact before. So we specify on our profile that we don't want unsolicited friends requests.
If someone then sends one we will happily have a gander at their private pics when they are offline, after all they sent the request so they must want us to have a look right?
We'll then promptly delete them from our friends list  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love friend requests, they make me feel attractive. I have lots of friends pics to attract the types that love to send unsolicited friend requests and no prior mail. |
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By *offee with MilkCouple
over a year ago
Over the roundabout and then turn right. |
"If I'm feeling particularly cheeky I accept, perve, fab the pics and then delete. Drives them nuts  "
That what we do. Accept once they are offline, fab a few pics before unfriending and then block, unless something really does catch our eye - but it hasn't yet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Look at the friends only pics then block.
People using friends request as a wink or to see my mug shot will be bitterly disappointed. Then blocked. Unless they are hot. Isn't that how fab works? |
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It's a bit passive aggressive if you have no intention of actually chatting and meeting. But if they've sent you the invite, they're obviously happy for you to see their pics. I personally just delete. |
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"Its not cheeky, its called managing your account. Unlikely that anyone is just going to accept an unknown person/couple as a friend without some sort of interaction first. Like you I only add as a friend once we've met. When all the unsolicited friend requests come in I always look through the profile of the requester just to find out about them and sometimes it has resulted in further dialogue and even a few meets. I always presume the requester is doing so because they have an interest in you. I never block people just because of the unsolicited request, I only do that if they become a pest or abusive when the request is not accepted."
Totally agree! |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky?"
Definitely not it is something that we do regularly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How we deal With a random friend request is up to us,same as it's up to the sender to ignore what's said on our profile,yet send anyway.
Guess how many we gladly accept? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit."
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion? "
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“ |
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“"
Erm i think what they mean when they say "in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester"
Because the requester has totally ignored what's in their profile so why shouldn't they look and ignore them .... x |
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Erm i think what they mean when they say "in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester"
Because the requester has totally ignored what's in their profile so why shouldn't they look and ignore them .... x "
I think I might not have got that message across right lol orbits confusing plz accept my apologies ill try again tomo when less tired lol xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Erm i think what they mean when they say "in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester"
Because the requester has totally ignored what's in their profile so why shouldn't they look and ignore them .... x
I think I might not have got that message across right lol orbits confusing plz accept my apologies ill try again tomo when less tired lol xx "
We will look forward to your return when less 'tired'. |
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Erm i think what they mean when they say "in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester"
Because the requester has totally ignored what's in their profile so why shouldn't they look and ignore them .... x
I think I might not have got that message across right lol orbits confusing plz accept my apologies ill try again tomo when less tired lol xx
We will look forward to your return when less 'tired'."
 ty sorry don't mean to offend xx |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“"
Correct, we are the same to get on our friends list we have to meet, there are far to many picture collectors, dreamers and the likes on here. However if you are stupid enough to send a friends request without actually meeting then when the person is off line, accept friends request look at photos and then defriend. We also block for good measure. So no I don't think they are lying or full of bull-shit at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Correct, we are the same to get on our friends list we have to meet, there are far to many picture collectors, dreamers and the likes on here. However if you are stupid enough to send a friends request without actually meeting then when the person is off line, accept friends request look at photos and then defriend. We also block for good measure. So no I don't think they are lying or full of bull-shit at all."
You seem to be completely missing my point.I'll try again.
They say they only accept after they have met.
They say in this thread that they accept to look at the senders pics.
So they have accepted without meeting.
They are lying in their profile when they say they only accept after meeting. |
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Correct, we are the same to get on our friends list we have to meet, there are far to many picture collectors, dreamers and the likes on here. However if you are stupid enough to send a friends request without actually meeting then when the person is off line, accept friends request look at photos and then defriend. We also block for good measure. So no I don't think they are lying or full of bull-shit at all.
You seem to be completely missing my point.I'll try again.
They say they only accept after they have met.
They say in this thread that they accept to look at the senders pics.
So they have accepted without meeting.
They are lying in their profile when they say they only accept after meeting."
Just to clarify, the statement on our profile referring to meeting in the flesh ranges from a social in the vanilla world or chatting in a club at the very least. That is to accept the friend request on a permanent basis.
What we are referring to in this thread is the unsolicited requests sent that have clearly not read this statement on our profile. Accepting one of these unwanted friend requests is simply to have a nosy at the profiles friend only photos and then subsequently remove from our friends list all whilst the user(s) offline. This them being none the wiser! ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I seem to get every single TV around the world asking me.just because am a TV myself.
And the number of people on the UK mainland asking me to clean for them can be a pain.
Because it's nice to get a message but why if am no where near |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Correct, we are the same to get on our friends list we have to meet, there are far to many picture collectors, dreamers and the likes on here. However if you are stupid enough to send a friends request without actually meeting then when the person is off line, accept friends request look at photos and then defriend. We also block for good measure. So no I don't think they are lying or full of bull-shit at all.
You seem to be completely missing my point.I'll try again.
They say they only accept after they have met.
They say in this thread that they accept to look at the senders pics.
So they have accepted without meeting.
They are lying in their profile when they say they only accept after meeting.
Just to clarify, the statement on our profile referring to meeting in the flesh ranges from a social in the vanilla world or chatting in a club at the very least. That is to accept the friend request on a permanent basis.
What we are referring to in this thread is the unsolicited requests sent that have clearly not read this statement on our profile. Accepting one of these unwanted friend requests is simply to have a nosy at the profiles friend only photos and then subsequently remove from our friends list all whilst the user(s) offline. This them being none the wiser! ?? "
No clarification needed, the facts had clearly been laid out in your original post.
You, at the end of it, asked if it was 'cheeky' to accept a friends request in order to just look at the senders private pictures. I said it was disingenuous as you say in your profile you only accept under certain terms.
It would be more honest if you expanded your terms for accepting friend requests on your profile to accommodate temporary acceptance. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Correct, we are the same to get on our friends list we have to meet, there are far to many picture collectors, dreamers and the likes on here. However if you are stupid enough to send a friends request without actually meeting then when the person is off line, accept friends request look at photos and then defriend. We also block for good measure. So no I don't think they are lying or full of bull-shit at all.
You seem to be completely missing my point.I'll try again.
They say they only accept after they have met.
They say in this thread that they accept to look at the senders pics.
So they have accepted without meeting.
They are lying in their profile when they say they only accept after meeting.
Just to clarify, the statement on our profile referring to meeting in the flesh ranges from a social in the vanilla world or chatting in a club at the very least. That is to accept the friend request on a permanent basis.
What we are referring to in this thread is the unsolicited requests sent that have clearly not read this statement on our profile. Accepting one of these unwanted friend requests is simply to have a nosy at the profiles friend only photos and then subsequently remove from our friends list all whilst the user(s) offline. This them being none the wiser! ??
No clarification needed, the facts had clearly been laid out in your original post.
You, at the end of it, asked if it was 'cheeky' to accept a friends request in order to just look at the senders private pictures. I said it was disingenuous as you say in your profile you only accept under certain terms.
It would be more honest if you expanded your terms for accepting friend requests on your profile to accommodate temporary acceptance. "
Think you are missing the point.
They don't send the friends request other people do who have not read their profile which say they will only accepting friends request once they have met.
We get loads of request from people all over the country who we have no interest in and have no hope of ever meeting. Invariably they are unverified been on the site ten minutes and obviously just out to collect pictures. On a couple of occasions we have actually found real friends photo in the private collection, which we report to admin and let our friends know. |
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Random ones usually mean they have not been arsed to read our profile or as the usual case turns out it's the new couples profile with no pictures (at the risk of upsetting a few here ) aka single guy spoiling the fun . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No not cheeky, more disingenuous. You're profile text is obviously bullshit.
Why is is disingenuous, they lay out what they are looking for and are not being pretentious or condescending in my opinion?
Because as quoted they say they will only accept once met in flesh... They say in this thread that they accept to look at pictures of requester. So it's a lie.
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Correct, we are the same to get on our friends list we have to meet, there are far to many picture collectors, dreamers and the likes on here. However if you are stupid enough to send a friends request without actually meeting then when the person is off line, accept friends request look at photos and then defriend. We also block for good measure. So no I don't think they are lying or full of bull-shit at all.
You seem to be completely missing my point.I'll try again.
They say they only accept after they have met.
They say in this thread that they accept to look at the senders pics.
So they have accepted without meeting.
They are lying in their profile when they say they only accept after meeting.
Just to clarify, the statement on our profile referring to meeting in the flesh ranges from a social in the vanilla world or chatting in a club at the very least. That is to accept the friend request on a permanent basis.
What we are referring to in this thread is the unsolicited requests sent that have clearly not read this statement on our profile. Accepting one of these unwanted friend requests is simply to have a nosy at the profiles friend only photos and then subsequently remove from our friends list all whilst the user(s) offline. This them being none the wiser! ??
No clarification needed, the facts had clearly been laid out in your original post.
You, at the end of it, asked if it was 'cheeky' to accept a friends request in order to just look at the senders private pictures. I said it was disingenuous as you say in your profile you only accept under certain terms.
It would be more honest if you expanded your terms for accepting friend requests on your profile to accommodate temporary acceptance.
Think you are missing the point.
They don't send the friends request other people do who have not read their profile which say they will only accepting friends request once they have met.
We get loads of request from people all over the country who we have no interest in and have no hope of ever meeting. Invariably they are unverified been on the site ten minutes and obviously just out to collect pictures. On a couple of occasions we have actually found real friends photo in the private collection, which we report to admin and let our friends know."
Please please assure me that you have never been let near jury service. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would like the option of being able to turn of the ability to receive winks and friend requests
Surely it isn’t that hard to add this function to the site |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dont get the problem with friend invites would rather that than endless messages and sending pics. Prefer to add then all can check each other out and if interested message then if not oh well move on.
i am amused at the blocking threats on some profiles .... The list of demands on others and must do and donts.
send me a pic or i wont reply but dont have any themselves.
drama mama |
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By *ilkenWoman
over a year ago
Manchester |
"So our profile reads:
“For safety and security we will only accept or add you as a friend once we've met you in the flesh! No exceptions!“
Albeit at the bottom of the lengthy text
So we use the unwanted friend requests as a chance to take a gander at the offenders profiles and friends only photos whilst they’re not online so they can’t reciprocate!
Is that a tad cheeky? Or if they can’t take the time to read down to the bottom does it seem acceptable?
Open the floor to discuss
xxx"
Why?
Just put your pics in private and they have added you for nothing then. |
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