FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Has it run it’s course

Has it run it’s course

By *andsome_Chef88 OP Man over a year ago

London

Hi people. Like to hear your thoughts on my situation,

Okay I haven’t had a meet off fab since March. I do get replies from women/couples to meet. Not many but I do get a fair amount of responses which is good. My problem is I hardly get the time off work and when I do I am usually tired to go on a meet or the person isn’t free the same time I am. I usually have interest from a woman for a few days then “poof” there not interested or don’t seem to have the same enthusiasm from when we started talking. I put it down to my slow replies, I admit I do take a while to respond or even forget to sometimes because my mind is busy at work.

So in your opinion do you think my time on fab has run its course (for meeting that is, as I do chat in forums when I have a little spare time)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I suppose if you really wanted to meet you would find time after all a hook up from here doesn’t have to take that long , a few hours at most ..it depends what you want from fab really some are on here for relationships others for nsa .. we have started to find we have little interest in meeting at the moment too maybe that will change or maybe we will just drift away from fab in time ..

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan over a year ago

Coventry

Don't give up. It's a limitation, not a barrier. I had the same problem with finding time due to unusual shift patterns and having children. And yes I found that not being able to hold back and forth conversation in real time (due to everything else going on in my life) was problematic to some. But you learn to be creative. Once you have a good rapport and great communication going with someone you can really get stuck into each other's calendars and find slots. In my experience if you both like each other enough you find time and wait for the slot even if its weeks down the line. Also I found location help. I did see someone off here who turned out lived a few streets away from me. So we were able to steel the odd few hours here and there around the kids. When free time is a problem it just takes more patience, creativity and an acceptance that not everyone with desire enough to go out their own way to accommodate your tricky time table (over more accommodating resourses).

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi people. Like to hear your thoughts on my situation,

So in your opinion do you think my time on fab has run its course (for meeting that is, as I do chat in forums when I have a little spare time) "

If you don't get much flexibility it could be a problem and there isn't a lot of ways round that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Only you can decide that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I find being flexible is key. Replaying positively, and sometimes taking the lead to whom accomadates that's the key accomadate.

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By *uteness69Woman over a year ago

Walthamstow

I'd guess only you know the answer.

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By *iamondCougarWoman over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

All conversations/connections run their course, depends how engaging you/she is

Some run for months prior and post meet, others..... *poof* lose interest fairly quickly.... you just move on from it

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By *hamboy69Man over a year ago

huddersfield

I can understand the OPs problem like most I’ve also found it’s pretty much a waste of time messaging on here in order to arrange meets.

If one was to rely on this site for meets many would be long gone

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi people. Like to hear your thoughts on my situation,

So in your opinion do you think my time on fab has run its course (for meeting that is, as I do chat in forums when I have a little spare time) "
yes it's normally the woman that's slow to reply and so if combined with her inability to interact you can't then it will be impossible

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By *ady LickWoman over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

No, I just think you need to be a little more organised at replying to your messages. Not speaking for everyone of course but personally I lose interest if someone leaves if a few days to get back to me, by then I'm possibly going to be chatting to others.

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By *Devil77Man over a year ago

West Midlands

Having replies is great, but if you can't meet up for at least a social then your not going to get anywhere really.

You get what you put in.

Put the effort,get the rewards.

Maybe reflect this in your profile?

Weekends only, evening's, weeks off.

Make it known to potential meets.

It may help

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

Hey OP hang in there...

Maybe you should make it clear that quick replies aren't always in your hands to do and that anything that may lead to a meet isn't going to be always that quick.

In regards to your motivation, that's clearly for you to figure out, but it might be better to hide your profile and not get messages for a while. You have said that the message go-round is currently favorable for you, so maybe in starving yourself of this, can make your hunger to get actively interested and participation raise once again.

Hope you find your Xanadu once more.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally

At the top of your profile add a note in capitals so it stands out the situation you are in.

I work long hours and im exhausted when i get home.

I do want to reply asap however that doesnt allways happen etc blah blah.

You dont have to keep repeating yourself .

Only you know if ur time on fabs up.

Its no biggie if you take a break.

Do whats good for you .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Unfortunately you are in the majority and the more limits your put into your connection the more limited the connection. Someone once said on here it's a 80% male 20% female split so the females have more options than the males. Supply and demand I'm afraid flexibility is the key here I'm afraid. Happy fabbing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I lose interest if someone takes ages to respond. It prevents the conversation achieving a natural rhythm and, in the absence of other information, I assume I am too far down their priority list to warrant a swift reply.

Maybe limit your chat to the days you definitely can meet, or just before, and put some effort into a few more targeted conversations?

If that feels like too much effort, then yes, it sounds like you might need a break..

Good luck!

There seems to be a lot of ‘meh’ going round..

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By *innie The MinxWoman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

If someone really wants meets, they'll make the time.

You are doing better than a lot of guys on here if you are getting replies and conversation going, but if you then get "too busy" to continue the chat then no wonder the other party moves on.

Lots of people on here lead busy lives. You can still manage expectations by saying you a generally only free on whenever, or generally on line to chat at whatever time.

Or be honest with yourself and admit you don't really want to make the effort of meeting...it isn't compulsory.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can understand the OPs problem like most I’ve also found it’s pretty much a waste of time messaging on here in order to arrange meets.

If one was to rely on this site for meets many would be long gone "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A couple of years ago I became jaded with the site. I was one of the lucky ones, had, had many meets over several years, in fact I was still seeing a couple regularly, but decided I wasn't feeling it any more, so just stopped logging in. Left my profile in situ. I then had a girl that I used to chat to message me out of the blue, we met up and then continued to do so weekly for around eight months, until she found a boyfriend. During this time I still wasn't on fab, then a couple of months went past and I reactivated my profile, had a meet and a social but still wasn't feeling it. So I went unlos. Until last week when I returned.

The point being, just don't log in or hide your profile, take a break. See how you feel in a month or two. If it still feels the same go unlos. You may feel differently in a few months and relish being on here again.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi people. Like to hear your thoughts on my situation,

So in your opinion do you think my time on fab has run its course (for meeting that is, as I do chat in forums when I have a little spare time) "

Maybe clubs would be best suited to you at your convenience x

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