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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I’m interested in what submissive men enjoy during a play session?
I’ve played a more Domme role a few times, tying someone one, spanking, flogging, Wax, verbal humiliation, getting someone to cross dress and if liked, I’ve used a strap on too.
I’m looking for ideas, as I think there’s a lot more I could do to improve the experience.
Happy for pms too.  |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
For me it's as much about the mind as the physical - feeling a big enough connection with someone to be able to trust them to take control when I give it to them and know they'll respect that and use it wisely within my limits.
Various physical aspects of course make up part of that but without that element of "feeling" submissive to someone it may as well just be kink play.
When it comes to the physical there are any number of things I enjoy - from spanking to nipple play to CBT and more besides but it does keep coming back to stimulation of the mind and being made to "feel" submissive in whatever form that may take.
That can of course be achieved in many ways - from simple honorifics being required to even just a look in a certain way - things like being expected to kneel in a certain way in a Dom/mes presence or being instructed what to wear when meeting etc.
It really is about finding the right person on both sides of the coin though and that in itself is one of the hardest things to do. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
The biggest key though is communication both ways - being able to talk to a sub and understand their needs or to talk to a Dom/me and clearly communicate what you seek.
There are some great on-line BDSM questionnaires that help focus the mind and get an understanding of what is/isn't acceptable too - many of them allow you to rate activities 1-5 in terms of how much they interest you or whether they may be limits etc. |
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Everything Gemini man said above - brilliant posts and sum it up perfectly.
Every sub is different and there are a million nuances of submission.
One of my long time fantasies was to be tied up helpless and to have a Domme run her boot over me, especially in the nether regions - when it happened it was 100% what I had imagined and was mind blowing.
There are many others - most of which I probably wont go into detail on a fully public forum. All good to experience at least once and if give a good enough buzz then twice.
Ice cubes are a good punishment
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
OP, I think that you may be getting confused between firstly your enjoyment in being able to bring more skills to the table and secondly the submissive's enjoyment. In the first situation go on workshops and learn all the skills that interest you. In the second case this is a matter that is subjective to the sub. As others have pointed out this requires full negotiation and discussion on a peer to peer basis and the sub being very clear on a real world basis what they are looking for from the dynamic as you as a domme are not a mind reader. This may only require being empathic in scenes and not requiring particular D/S skills.
Extreme Restraints University have some very good videos (censored ones on youtube and uncensored ones on the world's biggest porn site) and podcasts on D/S stuff hosted by Ian Rath and Aidan Starr. |
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