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Code words on a meet ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Afternoon fellow fabbers, we have a meet planned with a guy this weekend, it's a social but with the option of more should the 3 of us feel comfortable and happy to take it further.
We where wondering how you know if all 3 know we want it to go further, clearly both of us could have our own code word if we both feel comfortable, but how do you go about approaching the person your meeting, just ask and be straight to the point haha, we wouldn't want to come across rude or pushy by doing that or to put them on the spot like that.
We where just hoping to tap into other people's experience.
Mr and Mrs x  |
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Don't rely on code words. Tell the guy you need five minutes private chat because there could be something one of you wants to clarify. Then ask outright if he's up for it.
there is no way of knowing something if you don't ask. |
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"Don't rely on code words. Tell the guy you need five minutes private chat because there could be something one of you wants to clarify. Then ask outright if he's up for it.
there is no way of knowing something if you don't ask. "
this absolutely  |
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By *ida8780Couple
over a year ago
any town |
Guys usually respond to small signals like for example if you are sitting by him then lightly touch his leg or shoulder and ask him if he likes what he see is he interested. He should get the hint enough for the move.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Afternoon fellow fabbers, we have a meet planned with a guy this weekend, it's a social but with the option of more should the 3 of us feel comfortable and happy to take it further.
We where wondering how you know if all 3 know we want it to go further, clearly both of us could have our own code word if we both feel comfortable, but how do you go about approaching the person your meeting, just ask and be straight to the point haha, we wouldn't want to come across rude or pushy by doing that or to put them on the spot like that.
We where just hoping to tap into other people's experience.
Mr and Mrs x "
say whisle and flute meaning in cockney rhyming slang let's make him shoot or say tap on the floor..... Let's show him the door..... Sorted he'll be non the wiser  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Afternoon fellow fabbers, we have a meet planned with a guy this weekend, it's a social but with the option of more should the 3 of us feel comfortable and happy to take it further.
We where wondering how you know if all 3 know we want it to go further, clearly both of us could have our own code word if we both feel comfortable, but how do you go about approaching the person your meeting, just ask and be straight to the point haha, we wouldn't want to come across rude or pushy by doing that or to put them on the spot like that.
We where just hoping to tap into other people's experience.
Mr and Mrs x say whisle and flute meaning in cockney rhyming slang let's make him shoot or say tap on the floor..... Let's show him the door..... Sorted he'll be non the wiser "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Afternoon fellow fabbers, we have a meet planned with a guy this weekend, it's a social but with the option of more should the 3 of us feel comfortable and happy to take it further.
We where wondering how you know if all 3 know we want it to go further, clearly both of us could have our own code word if we both feel comfortable, but how do you go about approaching the person your meeting, just ask and be straight to the point haha, we wouldn't want to come across rude or pushy by doing that or to put them on the spot like that.
We where just hoping to tap into other people's experience.
Mr and Mrs x say whisle and flute meaning in cockney rhyming slang let's make him shoot or say tap on the floor..... Let's show him the door..... Sorted he'll be non the wiser "
whistle |
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Ask them if they want to come back to your place, or go to theirs.
As for between the couple, it's always ladies choice for an mmf, if it's no then she really has to say so, even if it is "I don't think we will take things further tonight" |
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I think the key is that it's got to be something for you. After a bit of trial and error, we've decided that having a social first is best for us. We often have no idea whether they're interested in us at all (we're hopeless and have stories to prove it!), so msging after saying we'd like to play gives everyone time to think about it, particularly if its another couple where all 4 have to be in agreement.
The next challenge is then how to start when you do meet.
We have an egg timer that we place on the table and we all have to be naked and in bed before it goes off.
I made up that last bit , but actually... 
Hmm x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When we meet, Mrs is in charge If it’s mmf and mr if it’s ffm. It’s worked for us so far ...we normally have a drink or two to loosen up ...if it’s game on it’s a top up of alcohol ..if it’s not we ask for a mixer ... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think the key is that it's got to be something for you. After a bit of trial and error, we've decided that having a social first is best for us. We often have no idea whether they're interested in us at all (we're hopeless and have stories to prove it!), so msging after saying we'd like to play gives everyone time to think about it, particularly if its another couple where all 4 have to be in agreement.
The next challenge is then how to start when you do meet.
We have an egg timer that we place on the table and we all have to be naked and in bed before it goes off.
I made up that last bit , but actually...
Hmm x"
The egg timer sounds like a fun idea |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When we meet, Mrs is in charge If it’s mmf and mr if it’s ffm. It’s worked for us so far ...we normally have a drink or two to loosen up ...if it’s game on it’s a top up of alcohol ..if it’s not we ask for a mixer ..."
We have both decided that we both have to like the people we meet, if one of us does and the other doesn't it's a no, don't see the point otherwise to be honest, we decided, as we are meeting in a pub, if the wife says she might have a jack Daniels and I say I might join her then we are both happy with him, might sound silly to some but we haven't had many meets to test these things.
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By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago
Dublin and London |
You could pop to the toilet and txt each other to see if it's 2 green lights..if it is just ask your meet if they fancy going back to yours or to your hotel room if it's a hotel meet... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When we meet, Mrs is in charge If it’s mmf and mr if it’s ffm. It’s worked for us so far ...we normally have a drink or two to loosen up ...if it’s game on it’s a top up of alcohol ..if it’s not we ask for a mixer ...
We have both decided that we both have to like the people we meet, if one of us does and the other doesn't it's a no, don't see the point otherwise to be honest, we decided, as we are meeting in a pub, if the wife says she might have a jack Daniels and I say I might join her then we are both happy with him, might sound silly to some but we haven't had many meets to test these things.
"
Sounds like a good plan.
Talking would be better, hopefully he will nip to the loo so you can discuss. |
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"When we meet, Mrs is in charge If it’s mmf and mr if it’s ffm. It’s worked for us so far ...we normally have a drink or two to loosen up ...if it’s game on it’s a top up of alcohol ..if it’s not we ask for a mixer ...
We have both decided that we both have to like the people we meet, if one of us does and the other doesn't it's a no, don't see the point otherwise to be honest, we decided, as we are meeting in a pub, if the wife says she might have a jack Daniels and I say I might join her then we are both happy with him, might sound silly to some but we haven't had many meets to test these things.
"
Not a secret code any more  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"When we meet, Mrs is in charge If it’s mmf and mr if it’s ffm. It’s worked for us so far ...we normally have a drink or two to loosen up ...if it’s game on it’s a top up of alcohol ..if it’s not we ask for a mixer ...
We have both decided that we both have to like the people we meet, if one of us does and the other doesn't it's a no, don't see the point otherwise to be honest, we decided, as we are meeting in a pub, if the wife says she might have a jack Daniels and I say I might join her then we are both happy with him, might sound silly to some but we haven't had many meets to test these things.
Not a secret code any more "
Oh no the secret is out haha, now every time you hear a coupe in a pub say about Jack Daniels you'll think it's us haha.
On our first meet with a couple a guy who messaged us a few times told us to pick a code word, he suggested strawberry.
Well went for a Chinese meal together and in my fortune cookie at the end I had the word strawberry in it 
Spark wasn't there though for the Mrs so didn't play |
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If you are meeting in a bar, before you go in agree with what you're both drinking and stick to it. If on ordering your next drinks, if either of you change your order, have that as your signal that your not happy with the situation. Clearly repeat orders mean your happy with how things are going. |
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I appreciate that it's not quite what your asking, but as a single guy if I am meeting a couple for a social, to avoid this difficulty, I say 'I'm off to the gents so feel free to have a chat and if you want to keep it as just a social, that's fine by me and feel free to say', which seems to be appreciated. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't rely on code words. Tell the guy you need five minutes private chat because there could be something one of you wants to clarify. Then ask outright if he's up for it.
there is no way of knowing something if you don't ask. "
This is one way of doing it. I lean towards a non verbal approach. I just keep flirting and it either leads on to something or it doesn't. The woman either responds positively to my flirting or not. Her husband either gives off good vibes or not. And the whole thing gets navigated simply without any need to ever confront the issue verbally. It's all about being clear with your body language, listening to everyone else's body language, and backing off if you feel someone isn't enjoying it. The whole point about seduction is that it's a slow escalation that you can keep on checking in with along the way and wind back if you feel it's not working. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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All our meets, where we liked the guy, have been extremely straightforward. It’s pretty obvious if I like someone, so they usually make a move by some pretty obvious bodily contact, eg hand on thigh. If practical then my husband would normally invite him to come home with us. If not practical then we would suggest a next time, but i’ll get a snog instead. But it all flows naturally so no need for code words.
Mrs |
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"Don't rely on code words. Tell the guy you need five minutes private chat because there could be something one of you wants to clarify. Then ask outright if he's up for it.
there is no way of knowing something if you don't ask.
This is one way of doing it. I lean towards a non verbal approach. I just keep flirting and it either leads on to something or it doesn't. The woman either responds positively to my flirting or not. Her husband either gives off good vibes or not. And the whole thing gets navigated simply without any need to ever confront the issue verbally. It's all about being clear with your body language, listening to everyone else's body language, and backing off if you feel someone isn't enjoying it. The whole point about seduction is that it's a slow escalation that you can keep on checking in with along the way and wind back if you feel it's not working. "
Whatever works for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Be straight is easiest"
cmon where's the fun in that...... I think you should say ' boom ' if you're thinking yes let's fuck em and bang if it's a 'oh no omg really' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mrs goes bathroom and says she's started bleeding or male half says I think Mrs might be bleeding and Mrs says no it's fine "
really I always see the Mrs going to the loo before first drink a little obvious they knew at that point trust me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I appreciate that it's not quite what your asking, but as a single guy if I am meeting a couple for a social, to avoid this difficulty, I say 'I'm off to the gents so feel free to have a chat and if you want to keep it as just a social, that's fine by me and feel free to say', which seems to be appreciated."
You're clever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Afternoon fellow fabbers, we have a meet planned with a guy this weekend, it's a social but with the option of more should the 3 of us feel comfortable and happy to take it further.
We where wondering how you know if all 3 know we want it to go further, clearly both of us could have our own code word if we both feel comfortable, but how do you go about approaching the person your meeting, just ask and be straight to the point haha, we wouldn't want to come across rude or pushy by doing that or to put them on the spot like that.
We where just hoping to tap into other people's experience.
Mr and Mrs x "
Use “It’s cumming home!” |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Last couple I met after a bit of chat to get to know each other, I nipped to the loo mostly to just give them a chance to have a quick whisper.
Ended up playing as soon as I was back. |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
If you don't want to take it further, say nothing,and if you do then say "we are both comfortable to take this further if and when you are ready".
The response will let you know if it's going to be immediate, or maybe another occasion. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I appreciate that it's not quite what your asking, but as a single guy if I am meeting a couple for a social, to avoid this difficulty, I say 'I'm off to the gents so feel free to have a chat and if you want to keep it as just a social, that's fine by me and feel free to say', which seems to be appreciated."
That's a really mature and straightforward approach which we would really look favourably on...we are all grown ups after all... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" If you don't want to take it further, say nothing,and if you do then say "we are both comfortable to take this further if and when you are ready".
The response will let you know if it's going to be immediate, or maybe another occasion."
but that would be an uncomfortable silence don't you think? |
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