FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Is abuse common because you are overweight
Is abuse common because you are overweight
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Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab? |
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A lot,what just random messages? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?"
Lol. I only find chunky guys attractive. See my fella for an example |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?"
No. Its not fair
You are a person and should be treated with respect x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One or two. Usually after I’ve already said no!
Take it on the chin, it says more about them than it does about you. |
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Lol. I only find chunky guys attractive. See my fella for an example
Your fella is a very lucky guy as you are beautiful but unfortunately to far for me lol |
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"A lot,what just random messages? "
No normally people i have contacted or even people that have contacted me then read my profile and sent abusive messages |
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"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?
No. Its not fair
You are a person and should be treated with respect x"
Thanks very much i treat everyone i message with respect i just dont understand why people can be so nasty unfortunately |
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"One or two. Usually after I’ve already said no!
Take it on the chin, it says more about them than it does about you. "
Thanks will do  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, you should be treated with respect the same as any other.
The only reason for getting abuse would be if you aren't upfront about size on your profile. But that isn't an excuse! There are plenty of larger people on fab, judging from photos, it's very inclusive, just look at the diversity on here, likes and dislikes.
I would hazard a guess that it is only a small minority as it usually is, giving out any abuse. |
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[Removed by poster at 12/05/18 09:50:06] |
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"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?
No. Its not fair
You are a person and should be treated with respect x"
Well said!
There is no need to be abusive in messages without due cause!
Whether or not a user isn't interested in your *type*, a simple "no Thanks" is fine..... We all Have preferences and tastes and size is never a justifiable cause to slag someone off. Where are we, a school playground?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just bullying people thinking they are perfect sigh
Noone is better than others |
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No excuse either way really - whether it's initiated contact by them or you. How very unpleasant. |
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"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?"
Looking at your photo there’s no issue (the leading comment in your profile about overweight seems to make it an issue so maybe think about removing it?).
You’re not wasting your time here. Abuse is common, for many things not just weight and very often directed at ladies too. Just report, block, delete and spend your time looking for people who are nice  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Different strokes for different folks I think. Everyone finds different things attractive. No need to send messages about it though. |
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Some people just like to be abusive and find anything to use as material. I get abuse for being heavily tattooed..'it's ugly', 'you've ruined your body' 'you would be beautiful without that shit on your skin'.
It's all horses for courses babe....ignore the haters and embrace the people who are attracted to you.
If you get really abusive messages, then simply report them to Fab admin and they will hopefully suspend their account. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes so you’re not on your own, had pretty vile messages about my body. Take no notice!! We can change our body size, they are stuck with their faces  |
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Too new around here (and i guess too small) to say - but i think thats its definitely the most socially acceptable prejudice.
I mean, sure - *some* people are overweight because they eat too much and don't exercise enough, but society in general likes to act as though anyone carrying a few extra pounds is clearly a glutton and lazy, and therefore it's fine to be judgemental towards them.
Indeed, not only do people act as if it's okay - they even seem to think they have the moral high ground and are entitled, almost obligated to take those people to task for their size.
It's bullshit. If the whole "eat too much, don't exercise enough = fat" thing were as universally true as they like to make out, I should be one of those people that needs a hoist to get out of bed.
As it is, I'm one of those annoying people that can eat anything and everything and never put on weight.
Sure - *some* people eat too much and don't exercise and that's why they're big - but the definition of a prejudice is making those kind of assumptions before getting to know the person.
I find it all a bit weird to be honest |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
Only after I've said no thanks. They are just show their true colours by doing this. Makes me laugh when they think I will instantly change my mind because of it. |
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It is sad to say some people just like to put other down. We come in all shapes and sizes and that is what makes us all so unique. For us sexy is not a size or shape, colour or race its about the aura you give off. Yes we have our preferences, but would never belittle others because of their bodies. Yes we belittle the timewasting wankers but part of the course when on Fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The last abusive we got was from a guy who was annoyed that we hadn't answered his message, so he followed that up with some nasty abuse about Bee's size and then blocked us.
It saddens/mildly amuses me that since then he has verifications from several large women.Part of me wants to send them a message saying do you realise what a dick this bloke is, but obviously we just have to forget it. Annoying though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only after I've said no thanks. They are just show their true colours by doing this. Makes me laugh when they think I will instantly change my mind because of it. "
Yup i have had this too |
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Thanks folks for all your posts greatly appreciated |
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I always feel better if I report it..
It's likely other people will receive abuse from that person.
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I’ve had some shitty comments from people about my size -pretty much always after I have not replied to a message or replied with a no thanks.
It’s hurtful, because I’d like to think that I am more than just my (ample) size.
On the flip side, I’ve also had meets with people for whom it hasn’t been an issue, and have made me feel like an absolute goddess for the time that I am with them.
The best thing to do is block and move on. If that’s their attitude they don’t deserve to meet you/play with you anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Too new around here (and i guess too small) to say - but i think thats its definitely the most socially acceptable prejudice.
I mean, sure - *some* people are overweight because they eat too much and don't exercise enough, but society in general likes to act as though anyone carrying a few extra pounds is clearly a glutton and lazy, and therefore it's fine to be judgemental towards them.
Indeed, not only do people act as if it's okay - they even seem to think they have the moral high ground and are entitled, almost obligated to take those people to task for their size.
It's bullshit. If the whole "eat too much, don't exercise enough = fat" thing were as universally true as they like to make out, I should be one of those people that needs a hoist to get out of bed.
As it is, I'm one of those annoying people that can eat anything and everything and never put on weight.
Sure - *some* people eat too much and don't exercise and that's why they're big - but the definition of a prejudice is making those kind of assumptions before getting to know the person.
I find it all a bit weird to be honest "
What did you just write?
Can someone translate this? |
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By *athnBobCouple
over a year ago
sandwell |
Some people join sites like fab just to send vile comments to others. That is their primary and only goal.
It makes them feel powerful for once in their sad little lives. On the street they would not say boo to a goose and nobody pays them any attention. They feel, and rightly so, insignificant and desperately crave someone.... anyone ..... to notice them for any reason (even bad).
Best thing to do is to treat them as the sad little person they are. Block, report and move on |
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"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?"
I'd say that the couples and females are blokes and I genuinely can't see genuine people abusing you a lot unless you reply with a shitty message after they've said no to you ?
99% just don't reply if they don't like you,
This doesn't make sense |
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"Too new around here (and i guess too small) to say - but i think thats its definitely the most socially acceptable prejudice.
I mean, sure - *some* people are overweight because they eat too much and don't exercise enough, but society in general likes to act as though anyone carrying a few extra pounds is clearly a glutton and lazy, and therefore it's fine to be judgemental towards them.
Indeed, not only do people act as if it's okay - they even seem to think they have the moral high ground and are entitled, almost obligated to take those people to task for their size.
It's bullshit. If the whole "eat too much, don't exercise enough = fat" thing were as universally true as they like to make out, I should be one of those people that needs a hoist to get out of bed.
As it is, I'm one of those annoying people that can eat anything and everything and never put on weight.
Sure - *some* people eat too much and don't exercise and that's why they're big - but the definition of a prejudice is making those kind of assumptions before getting to know the person.
I find it all a bit weird to be honest
What did you just write?
Can someone translate this?"
Which bit are you struggling with? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have to say I’ve found it surprising how few of those types of messaged I have received.
It does hurt when I get them.
As much as I try and laugh and role my eyes when someone messages me first and then gets abusive about my size when I polite decline it does still sting, so I’m really sorry to hear you are having this experience. x |
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"I have to say I’ve found it surprising how few of those types of messaged I have received.
It does hurt when I get them.
As much as I try and laugh and role my eyes when someone messages me first and then gets abusive about my size when I polite decline it does still sting, so I’m really sorry to hear you are having this experience. x"
You shouldn't have to but i would block instantly after your polite decline |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One or two. Usually after I’ve already said no!
Take it on the chin, it says more about them than it does about you. "
Absolutely this!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have to say I’ve found it surprising how few of those types of messaged I have received.
It does hurt when I get them.
As much as I try and laugh and role my eyes when someone messages me first and then gets abusive about my size when I polite decline it does still sting, so I’m really sorry to hear you are having this experience. x
You shouldn't have to but i would block instantly after your polite decline"
Thanks x |
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By *nugglepussWoman
over a year ago
Notts, East Midlands |
It takes all sorts and body shapes, we can't be attracted to everyone. Stick with it, and if you are getting abuse report it. |
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Does not matter the size nor colour on here you will get abuse from the freaks around
You even get it for a few verifications too
So you become think sinked unfortunately to it all
People just have to remember it's a sex site NOT a dating site
Personally I don't tend to do meets any longer but tend to meet folk at clubs and socials as likely to be timewasters |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does not matter the size nor colour on here you will get abuse from the freaks around
You even get it for a few verifications too
So you become think sinked unfortunately to it all
People just have to remember it's a sex site NOT a dating site
Personally I don't tend to do meets any longer but tend to meet folk at clubs and socials as likely to be timewasters"
I’m a little confused by what you mean by your comment “People just have to remember it's a sex site NOT a dating site”? Just because I just don’t see the relevance’s to the topic. Whatever type of site it is people don’t need to be nasty, just ignore or politely decline. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't get that comment either to be honest. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Too new around here (and i guess too small) to say - but i think thats its definitely the most socially acceptable prejudice.
I mean, sure - *some* people are overweight because they eat too much and don't exercise enough, but society in general likes to act as though anyone carrying a few extra pounds is clearly a glutton and lazy, and therefore it's fine to be judgemental towards them.
Indeed, not only do people act as if it's okay - they even seem to think they have the moral high ground and are entitled, almost obligated to take those people to task for their size.
It's bullshit. If the whole "eat too much, don't exercise enough = fat" thing were as universally true as they like to make out, I should be one of those people that needs a hoist to get out of bed.
As it is, I'm one of those annoying people that can eat anything and everything and never put on weight.
Sure - *some* people eat too much and don't exercise and that's why they're big - but the definition of a prejudice is making those kind of assumptions before getting to know the person.
I find it all a bit weird to be honest
What did you just write?
Can someone translate this?"
I;m struggling with it too. If people are overweight I couldn't careless. Their body. Their choices. Their life.
And while I agree it;s not right to take people to task for being overweight I'm really struggling with the logic that it;s nothing to do with too many calories, too little exercise. Yes some people are unlucky but most it's all down to their lifestyle choices |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It makes them feel better about themselves because they have a complex about something regarding their body. |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"Hi just want to know what your thoughts are on overweight people on fab i get alot of abusive messages from couples and ladies because i am overweight am i wasting my time being on fab?"
No, wait, you mean you actually receive messages?! Go you!
Ignore them.
Personally Ive not had any abuse and we are both lard arses.
I guess it depends how you respond and interact with people. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
As people are now putting content of PM's up I am going to shut this
To the OP, any abuse is not acceptable for the site, always report and let Admin check it out |
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