FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Finding a swinging buddy / guy friend

Finding a swinging buddy / guy friend

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Hi I was wondering if anyone could offer any advice on finding a guy on here.

Let me try to explain...

I would like to talk to and get to know another gentleman. I am straight and am not looking for a guy for anything sexual with my self.

Myself and my girlfriend have discussed the possibility of playing with others but we are not 100% sure if we are ready yet. We both find the idea of having some naughty fun with another guy or girl or couple very hot, but at the same time we feel that maybe if we actually try it, we might become jealous seeing each other enjoying some sordid filthy play with someone else.

From my point of _iew, I do like the thought of seeing her fucked hard by another guy, but I know I don't want it to be just anyone. I would like to get to know a guy first. Ideally I would like to get on with him, almost as if I want to know that this fella is a nice gent and deserving of fucking my gorgeous lady.

Am I insane? lol

Does anything like this ever happen?

Everytime I have tried talking to another guy in the chatrooms it always seems that they are not interested in just normal talking, or they assume you are a gay or bi chap coming on to them.

I would appreciate any constructive thoughs on the matter

Thanks,

Debaser X

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

1... decide between you both if you want to swing.

2.... maybe go along to a club for a social night and chat with others, no pressure to play.

3... take your time.....

good luck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

*Raises hand* lol

You're not mad, it's probably the best route to go down to be honest. Once every is comfortable with each other then it all flows easier.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Im guessing, but i think u will find it hard on here to just strike up a friendship with a single guy. They are on here to have fun, and may possibly think ur a timewaster/dreamer if ur wanting endless chat.

I agree with _iew.....Id both go to a club, see how u like the atmosphere, get chatting to people there and see how u both feel. Perhaps even go with the decision ur not going to play, so there is no pressure!

good luck

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

I think you are doing it the right way, I play alone but my boyfriend likes to know there good decent guys.

Maybe chatrooms arnt the best place but look at profiles on the site and male guys that have verifications from couples and explain it to them.

Some guys want instant fun but there are also some really decent guys on here who would be happy to play it your way

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By *evonTallGuyMan over a year ago

Newton Abbot

I think you've got the perfect attitude and I wish more people took your approach.

Dunno about you but the chatrooms make my head spin. Blink at the wrong moment and you miss your chance! I think it's better to send a well-crafted message explaining how you want things to work, and judge how to proceed from the response you get.

I've been chatting to a couple locally on and off for the last few months who are in the same position as you. I sent a speculative message and the guy replied saying he wanted to chat alone at first, then introduce his girlfriend. All worked out well. We chatted for ages about all sorts of things. His gf kept saying "thanks for being so friendly" which I thought was odd as it's the way I'd deal with anybody I've never met, whether face to face or on msn. Given some of the comments in these forums I can now see why she said it.

They still haven't plucked up courage to meet yet, but that's fine with me. We still chat and I'm not going to pressure them. If we do meet then I'd like to think I'd made it a bit easier for them, and if we don't at least I'll have chatted to some thoroughly decent people along the way.

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By *woBiTwoCouple over a year ago

north manchester

*M (him)*

There's no one-size-fits-all way of getting started, and, remembering our early days only a couple of years ago, it's a very daunting time. Your ideas seem sensible and considered, and have escape routes in case you get uncomfortable with the idea.

My life-long fantasy was, as yours, to see my partner getting well and truly fucked by another, fit guy, but the fear I had was not that I'd have any jealousy (I never have) but that she wouldn't enjoy it. The only way round for us was to both be involved in picking the right guy, and to meet him socially first. It worked a treat, even though all three of us were nervous, and a grand time was had by all!

The pre-play, social meet has become our standard MO for all occasions now. It doesn't need to be anything extravagant - we normally meet in a pub or coffee shop convenient for both parties, and spend anything from an hour to two or three just chatting and sizing each other up. It has worked well for us, with only a very few exceptions.

Hope you find what you're looking for: all I can say is that for us, it has been great fun, and pulled us even closer together in the last couple of years.

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By *odareyouMan over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

I agree fully with all the comments above

If your message is constructed as well as the forum subject I cant understand the guys thinking you're a time waster, it explains what you are searching for and more importantly why, as it happens, and fortunately for you they aren't the right guy for your situation, , the guy you're looking for will need to have patience, and respect,

I m sure he's out there you will need patience and be very selective, socialise with them enjoy some leisure time etc...

plato said you learn more about a person in an hour of play than a year of conversations,

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

Not massively read what has been said but my quick reply is your profile is a man but your saying you want a male to join in with you and your other half, so that makes you a couple. I would say get a couple profile and put pics of you both on and explain what your looking for in the porofile in depth and maybe an experienced swinger will be happy to meet you both socially and take it slow.

Clubs are a good idea to see how you feel. Talk talk and more talk with your other half about it.

But I would suggest a couple profile as your a couple or as you have a single man profile and your contacting men alot of men have other men blovked so they cant mail you and then they also may just think your bi and that isnt what your saying I believe.

Hope that helps x

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