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Bdsm for begginers
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
If you go to a fetish club you will be able to watch scenes unfold and see what attracts you both. When the scene is finished you may be able to, if the time is right, approach the people involved and ask them questions.
Never disturb a scene in progress though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Any tips we wanna really take our sex to the next level we love pegging love restraints and things but need tips on how to go further any advise for awesome bdsm fun ?"
There is alot to learn within bdsm and depending on the level you want to take it there is different ways to learn.
First most areas have a local munch, this is a pub social for kinksters. A great place to find people willing to show you the ropes.
Also there is a social media site called fetlife dedicated to kinkster and bdsm. This is a great way to read learn anf talk in kink forums etc to learn.
3rd find a couple on here that has a kink bdsm background. Most of us are always willing to answer question ect so those trying it know how to be safe.
Ennoy your fun learning xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Any tips we wanna really take our sex to the next level we love pegging love restraints and things but need tips on how to go further any advise for awesome bdsm fun ?"
When I went to Xtasia the one time.. I was told if it interested me, to ask the couples who put on a display for others.. that they like talking about it.
It scared the life out of me, so I did a runner sharpish.. I can't think of a better place to go see if it's for you and to get some tips. I did talk to the couple afterwards and they were very friendly.. but it wasn't about tips.. I was expressing my shock and awe! Which they found hilarious. I'm a sensitive soul lol |
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"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know 
And tell you what not to do. "
You just need to be a billionaire with a helicopter and room of kink- loosens knicker elastic at a thousand yards 
(as i only have a modest bank account, estate car and room of junk- i usually keep an eye out for the women who don't wear knickers  ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know
And tell you what not to do.
You just need to be a billionaire with a helicopter and room of kink- loosens knicker elastic at a thousand yards
(as i only have a modest bank account, estate car and room of junk- i usually keep an eye out for the women who don't wear knickers )"
Thats me fucked then |
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Wax play and staples are fun. Plenty of clubs do demos. I’m doing a staple corset demo at Townhouse beginning of March but there’s plenty of others clubs and demo types around. Ropes fun too so look for a Peer Rope Group  |
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For what it is worth, my thoughts:
As others have said, most people are very helpful and happy to share knowledge of their experiences exploring bdsm. In the end though it is what feels right for you, there should not be a right and wrong or list of things to you have to do. Although you need to be aware of some safety and welfare guidance with ropes or hitty things . . .
The BBB in Birmingham is a good place to visit to shop, mix and as a taster in a friendly environment. They also have an after party where you can observe or explore alone without obligation. Other fetish and alternative markets have similar set ups.
A conversation or even correspondence with others can get you off the launch pad, so to speak.
I still keep in touch with two people very experienced people who helped and even mentored me many years ago, although I haven’t seen them face to face for years.
Also one or two pro-Dommes that run dungeon hire facilities can be helpful with tutoring. They would guide or coach you through a visit if you required that level of service. Most are friendly and professional. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Role play is lots of fun.....you can play out almost ANY fantasy/situation no matter how kinky. Even a few "taboo" ones if you get really adventuress.  "
I'm into being a Daddy/princess role play, didn't think I was into it until a few weeks ago |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
All great advice above OP - the other thing that is worth considering to help you both shape your thoughts and how you want to play this is full out an online BDSM questionnaire (there are lots of good ones) - they tend to cover a wide variety of activities that you can indicate what level of interest you have in them (from none at all to fuck yes I want to try that) - if you both fill them out independently and then compare notes to see where you have matches it might help - even if only to give you some ideas for things to try between you as an add on to your normal sexual play sessions.
As for recommending reading "Screw The Roses Bring Me The Thorns" and "SM101" are both widely rated as being worthy reads and are available on Amazon etc.
One other thing to remember is to take it slowly and continually communicate, always going at the lowest common denominator's speed - never try and push things beyond that.
Good luck and have fun |
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Lots of good advice above.
But remember that there is no right or wrong way to do BDSM.
But there is safe and unsafe.
Not talking about condoms, but more about possible risks from whips, over-tight restraints etc.
Best to communicate clearly and take small steps. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like it’s been said above, pop to a munch and speak to a few people. Pop to a Fetish club but remember the range of Fetish is from sensual to extreme so some things may shock you.
Easing yourselves in certainly start with a munch and go from there! |
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"Any tips we wanna really take our sex to the next level we love pegging love restraints and things but need tips on how to go further any advise for awesome bdsm fun ?"
It sounds like you're at the end of your chain and need more ideas
  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wax play and staples are fun. Plenty of clubs do demos. I’m doing a staple corset demo at Townhouse beginning of March but there’s plenty of others clubs and demo types around. Ropes fun too so look for a Peer Rope Group "
Staples? As in stationery staples?
Although we've done wax play, I do consider myself to be too much of a wimp for BDSM and reading your comment I felt myself go white 
Ginger |
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"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know "
ha ha ha .thats a joke isn't it .50shades of tripe more like it .if you are really serious about bdsm this is the wrong place to look . that film is mild titillation nothing more .go to fetish events,clubs and demos to get the real insight into the true bdsm world |
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I'm a bdsm kink ...I do full body stapling ,waxing ,electrics ,needleplay ,fireplay ,flesh hooks ,,judicial punishment ,caning,birching ,Chain whipping ....now that's all part of bdsm |
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"Wax play and staples are fun. Plenty of clubs do demos. I’m doing a staple corset demo at Townhouse beginning of March but there’s plenty of others clubs and demo types around. Ropes fun too so look for a Peer Rope Group
Staples? As in stationery staples?
Although we've done wax play, I do consider myself to be too much of a wimp for BDSM and reading your comment I felt myself go white
Ginger "
its a medical stapler is used, usually has around 30 staples in it and is disposable . they cost around £10 .one is not enough for me .I usually use 4 at a time . I've had the full ribbon corsetting done on my back |
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"Wax play and staples are fun. Plenty of clubs do demos. I’m doing a staple corset demo at Townhouse beginning of March but there’s plenty of others clubs and demo types around. Ropes fun too so look for a Peer Rope Group
Staples? As in stationery staples?
Although we've done wax play, I do consider myself to be too much of a wimp for BDSM and reading your comment I felt myself go white
Ginger "
No not stationary staples lol, it’s medical staples |
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"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know
And tell you what not to do. "
Lol! For a better BDSM book series check out Cherise Sinclair's Masters of the Shadowlands. Hot Masters, strong subs, and a club where safety the name of the game. Good way to start exploring what you might like.
As others have said already Fetlife is a great site for the social side, and finding munches and events near you. Good luck |
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"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know "
Indeed - as a beginner's guide to how to spot a stalker who regards consent violations as acceptable (ike Christian Grey) it's almost perfect. Except for the shit writing, the cliches and the trite plot devices, that is. |
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"Any tips we wanna really take our sex to the next level we love pegging love restraints and things but need tips on how to go further any advise for awesome bdsm fun ?"
Here's my postit note guide to exploring BDSM. Sit down with your partner. Write on the post its what you'd like to experience. Separate out the things in the lists; the emotions and feelings (vulnerable, scared, powerful, safe and so one), the actions (pegging, caning, bondage, sounding, edge play, blindfolds, cuffs) and the roles (and promise not to blush if either of you mentions the ones that make other people go ick...)
Then talk. Talk about the post its each of you has in each pile. Talk about the things you both like the sound of. Talk about the things you don't like the sound of. Fire up google and look for safety advice on the things that make you go mmmmmmmmmm.....
Then go for it.... |
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"Any tips we wanna really take our sex to the next level we love pegging love restraints and things but need tips on how to go further any advise for awesome bdsm fun ?Here's my postit note guide to exploring BDSM. Sit down with your partner. Write on the post its what you'd like to experience. Separate out the things in the lists; the emotions and feelings (vulnerable, scared, powerful, safe and so one), the actions (pegging, caning, bondage, sounding, edge play, blindfolds, cuffs) and the roles (and promise not to blush if either of you mentions the ones that make other people go ick...)
Then talk. Talk about the post its each of you has in each pile. Talk about the things you both like the sound of. Talk about the things you don't like the sound of. Fire up google and look for safety advice on the things that make you go mmmmmmmmmm.....
Then go for it...."
Seriously he knows what he knows
(Kaz)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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hi my gf is wanting to try her first gangbang or we are wanting another couple to swap were new to fhis. how do we go about this. we need to be discreet. my gf is stunning beyond my level pm for pics. n she loves cock n pussy n being n used.like a slut |
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"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know Indeed - as a beginner's guide to how to spot a stalker who regards consent violations as acceptable (ike Christian Grey) it's almost perfect. Except for the shit writing, the cliches and the trite plot devices, that is."
Can't say I've read it (nor watched it), so I can't personally comment, but I rather liked Victoria Coren-Mitchell's verdict:
"Puts the 'b' into 'anal'" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Buy a couple of books on the subject too. Have a look on book retailers web sites for any that take your fancy."
Yes, do not read fifty shades or watch the film it is crap and has nothing to do with the reality of BDSM. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Any tips we wanna really take our sex to the next level we love pegging love restraints and things but need tips on how to go further any advise for awesome bdsm fun ?"
Join that other website that can’t be mentioned on here without incurring the wrath of Admin. It begins with fet and has a dot com but thats as far as I dare go! 
Local munches are brilliant for dipping your tow in the BDSM scene. They can be quite cliquey but we have always found them very friendly and most people are only too happy to give out advice and point you in the right direction of good clubs etc
Have fun. Thats the main thing!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Talk to each other, read books and above all walk your own path. Bdsm is different for everyone and you have to discover what it is for you. "
Best answer so far |
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By *anklerMan
over a year ago
Suffolk |
"50 shades of grey will tell you everything you need to know Indeed - as a beginner's guide to how to spot a stalker who regards consent violations as acceptable (ike Christian Grey) it's almost perfect. Except for the shit writing, the cliches and the trite plot devices, that is."
I'd quite like his bank balance though |
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