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We can't be the only ones looking for social aspect above all, to start with?
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Hi all...
I'm just wondering if any others can relate to this?
We've been together for over 2 years now, and on here for a while. Though we've both been on swinger's sites for years and had our fun separately, we have yet to go further as a couple.
What we're really looking for right now is other people (especially couples) to get to know and feel comfortable with on a personal basis before moving further. But--it seems that most we chat with want immediate action, not something we're ready to do quite yet. While we definitely would like to play in time, our goal for now is just to meet other like minded people and form a connection.
We've had social meets and been to socials. No complaints there!
But so far, haven't met a couple who is interested in the friendship aspect only to start with.
So--I'm putting this out there. If you are interested in getting to know a quirky couple and keeping it at the friendship stage, leave a comment or contact us. We'd love to get to know people for the social aspect of it all, and who knows what may happen in future? |
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By *emel9Man
over a year ago
West Midlands |
The social side of swinging has become more and more what interests me.
Yes the playing is fun, going to the clubs etc, but this tends to be with people I now know really well.
Totally on the same page as you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find when looking for ladies or (with my fwb) couples to play with, the social aspect is essential, whether I would be playing with the lady of the couple or not...I just think things go better if the girls get along, if everyone fancies who they will be playing with already  |
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Social aspect is crucial for me, I'd never meet someone outside of a club environment who wouldn't meet socially first. I'm always more than happy to keep it to a drink etc without play on the first meet too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love the social side. I've met really interesting people on here. Really enjoy going to a club or social knowing that there are people there that I will enjoy spending time with and with whom I can talk outrageous sex-based bollocks without anyone getting offended. Most people seem to have a good sense of humour too. I guess that's essential in this world. |
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Look for couples who want soft play.
They will be more likely to want a social meet to.
Alternatively head for a club, you can play, socialise and meet at your own pace without pressure etc and it’s good fun too.
Mr M |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some of our closest friends have come into our lives through this hobby...we love the social aspect and it certainly makes the conversation around our dinner table stimulating at times! It's not what we looked for initially but we've met such amazing people, we just all clicked on the social level and it worked too well to give it up!  |
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We really like to meet people who we could be friends with under other circumstances. People we can easily spend a few hours hanging out over a few coffees or some drinks.
We're predominantly looking for same room, same partner exhibition play so that may be why we're so into the social side?  |
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The social side of swinging is great but it can be difficult. We try and make it clear that if we meet socially it doesn't mean that we're agreeing to anything more but that isn't always taken on board. Also it can happen that the more you meet people socially the less likely you are to meet sexually.
We would love to have a circle of friends we could discuss things openly with but it hasn't happened yet
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"Hi all...
I'm just wondering if any others can relate to this?
We've been together for over 2 years now, and on here for a while. Though we've both been on swinger's sites for years and had our fun
separately, we have yet to go further as a couple.
What we're really looking for right now is other people (especially couples) to get to know and feel comfortable with on a personal basis before moving further. But--it seems that most we chat with want immediate action, not something we're ready to do quite yet. While we definitely would like to play in time, our goal for now is just to meet other like minded people and form a connection.
We've had social meets and been to socials. No complaints there!
But so far, haven't met a couple who is interested in the friendship aspect only to start with.
So--I'm putting this out there. If you are interested in getting to know a quirky couple and keeping it at the friendship stage, leave a comment or contact us. We'd love to get to know people for the social aspect of it all, and who knows what may happen in future?"
Some off our fab friends are just friends we have never played with them others we have known a while before we played with them we love the social side of swinging as well as playing |
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"The social side of swinging has become more and more what interests me.
Yes the playing is fun, going to the clubs etc, but this tends to be with people I now know really well.
Totally on the same page as you."
Agree |
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Being a single woman the social side is important but also creates situations where the men I’ve met interpret that as one drink & knickers down even when I’ve clearly said Social Only.
I’ve attended a club for over a year and not played once as it’s one of the only places I can go, dance, chat without feeling like a BillyNoMates. |
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"Being a single woman the social side is important but also creates situations where the men I’ve met interpret that as one drink & knickers down even when I’ve clearly said Social Only.
I’ve attended a club for over a year and not played once as it’s one of the only places I can go, dance, chat without feeling like a BillyNoMates."
Wish I was closer. Would love a drink and dance with you xx |
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"Being a single woman the social side is important but also creates situations where the men I’ve met interpret that as one drink & knickers down even when I’ve clearly said Social Only.
I’ve attended a club for over a year and not played once as it’s one of the only places I can go, dance, chat without feeling like a BillyNoMates.
Wish I was closer. Would love a drink and dance with you xx"
You look like a laugh and knows what she wants.....My Eureka partner 
Loving the picture of you sitting on the edge of the bath x |
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On our couples profile we look for the same. As my other half really needs a social aspect to gauge wether she's attracted to the couple or not(I'm easier going, must be the feral guy side coming through). But we are prepared to play on a first date AFTER a successful social.
But as you say OP, most people want it right here, right now. We figured a big part of it is that for couples with kids and who work, they probably only get one night off a week at most, and prefer to only meet guaranteed fucks. Same as people who go to clubs only to meet people they've prearranged with.
It's about instant gratification, which is a thread in itself. I could write a thesis on it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You should try a club. Great way to get to know people social and no pressure to play x"
This is the way we prefer, we feel that we don’t need long to decide if we will play or not. In a club you can chat on the sauna or have a drink what ever you like. No pressure much more relaxed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Couldn't agree more that the social side is very important as a basis for anything else that might follow.
Of course, the same goes for singles too and not just couples. I like to know a bit about someone and feel relaxed. It makes anything that happens later (if it does) so much more enjoyable! |
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This is top of our agenda this year. We want to have social friends in the lifestyle. If it leads to play then great, if not, then a lasting friendship with others in the lifestyle is just as good.
We’ve been on here for 2 years and had some great meets but not many people stick around and we’ve grown tired of that one time hook ups. Friendships in the lifestyle that we can socialise with and maybe play is what we want from now on.
But we’ve been advised by many that this is extremely hard to do on here and the one way we’d get this is to attend clubs/socials so that’s what we’re going to do.
But yes, couldn’t agree more. Not many on here want to have the friendship part/to chat to get to know one another, it’s an instant action meet or nothing and then to get rid of you quickly to move onto the next. That’s the impression we have gotten by the majority. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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one example of how it works for us is this Christmas. Around our christmas dinner table was a couple we met through swinging with their son and a single woman friend as well. We had a fantastic christmas day...all very civilised but great fun. We have properly crossed over with some friends and they are a massive part of our lives because we have just got on so incredubly well with some people.
We don't specifically look for that level of connection and do have friends outside of the hobby but why deny ourselves the opportunity to have a deep connection with people when it happens just because of the connotations of how and where you met? |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
While fully understanding that sone couples may prefer social meets before playing and need to feel a connection with those they play with, we are quite the opposite. We have a very rich vanilla social life but swing to fulfil our sexual fantasies, one of which is nsa sex with strangers. We play almost entirely in clubs where sometimes, with mutual attraction, the sex can be pretty much spontaneous. Having said that, we have become friends with a few of the single guys and couples we have played with, but it's not what we specifically look for or need. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is always a thin line between being more sociable/friendly and becoming entangled in other people’s lives, our private life is ours, we do have naughty playmates we consider friends but we really don’t have time for social only meets, doesn’t mean we are not sociable.
The club scene has a lot of swinging socialites hanging out at clubs every weekend, try a club |
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