FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Easing her in gently
Easing her in gently
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"What’s the best way to progress from bedroom fantasy to sharing her for real?  "
Start off by adjusting your language. You don't 'share' a person, they do what they want. She isn't a chocolate bar - she isn't your property to share.
If you would like to explore mutual fantasies of group sex, then suggest that to her. See what she thinks. Suggest a swinging club. Have a look at Fabs together. |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"Btw she isn’t exactly innocent, she had a fling with her pt "
To be honest - I think you should only swing when you have a really strong relationship. If you're on here and she's cheating on you with her personal trainer, that doesn't sound like a very good relationship to get involved with other people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve never cheated, just curious "
Your profile say different .looking to meet ????
If you want to do this with your partner or wife then honesty will get you started . delete ,talk and start again is our advice . Fab life style is about sharing . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for your honesty, it’s difficult for us to talk really since the thing with her pt happened "
I'd start by taking the advice Ms Lewd has given you
It is jolly good advice |
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"Thanks for your honesty, it’s difficult for us to talk really since the thing with her pt happened "
Work on that first. Successful swinging relationships are based on good communication. If you go in to this with unresolved issues it'll make them worse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for your honesty, it’s difficult for us to talk really since the thing with her pt happened "
But you being on here as a single “looking to meet” doesn’t seem like a good next step does it?
You need to discuss properly why she felt the need to “stray”. Does she have fantasies desires to be with others....and is it something you can do as a shared experience?
As others have suggested....perhaps delete your profile (at least for now). Talk to her about sharing fantasies/desires. Do a random search for swinging/sites..... and “discover” the fab site. Look at it together, start a joint profile and off you go.....! |
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"Thanks for your honesty, it’s difficult for us to talk really since the thing with her pt happened "
Sort the drama in your relationship out first before trying anything else. It would not be fair on anyone you met to throw them into a situation with a couple who have big issues. |
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Yep talk to her.
The affair has little to do with swinging, so sort that out.
Go to a club, make a conscious choice not to swing and just enjoy the atmosphere. Plan to leave after an hour or 2. If you both come away wishing you had done more, there is always another day.
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"Yep talk to her.
The affair has little to do with swinging, so sort that out.
Go to a club, make a conscious choice not to swing and just enjoy the atmosphere. Plan to leave after an hour or 2. If you both come away wishing you had done more, there is always another day.
"
Good idea |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s the best way to progress from bedroom fantasy to sharing her for real? "
Who's fantasy is it? Hers or yours?
How did you feel when you knew she was fucking her pt? |
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By *ndeenaMan
over a year ago
Upminster |
Respect her views and listen to her first in the PT fling.
Not sure suggesting a club visit straight away might have positive effect all the time. I suggest starting with watching mature porn together and gradually moving to watching MFM three way stuff. Then suggest going to a club to see mature couple in action sometimes in future. Suggest just a visit with few drinks and coming back. If she didn't reject the club visit offer then arrange it to go to a nice club on special days (like birthday or anniversary or similar).
Then go home and discuss about it. If it looks like she enjoys going there then try to attend swing social drinks events to meet fellow swingers in a relaxed social event in a public place.
After that you both will enjoy. Don't push anything. Give her the freedom to decide. Happy swinging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sound like you need to talk things through with her, open heartedly and honest. Very difficult think to do, as it may raise issues or you may hear things you don't want to. If you don't talk about it, you're on a rocky road.
Good luck OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks, it’s difficult to talk sometimes but I’ll give it a go. Shit or bust eh?"
If you don't sort out the fling and have open , honest communication it won't work - go relationship counselling to help you talk about the issues and learn how to be open and honest and s good listener too x
Good luck x |
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"Btw she isn’t exactly innocent, she had a fling with her pt
To be honest - I think you should only swing when you have a really strong relationship. If you're on here and she's cheating on you with her personal trainer, that doesn't sound like a very good relationship to get involved with other people."
Indeed....sounds a little like OP is perhaps looking for some payback |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s the best way to progress from bedroom fantasy to sharing her for real? "
1. Romantic night in hotel
2. Bed restraints
3. Blindfold
4. Invite at least double as many wont show  |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"Thanks for your honesty, it’s difficult for us to talk really since the thing with her pt happened
Work on that first. Successful swinging relationships are based on good communication. If you go in to this with unresolved issues it'll make them worse."
Totally agree. Sounds as if you have trust issues. You want to introduce her to other guys? What if she really likes one. Will you get jealous?
Sit and talk about what happened. Swinging won’t fix a broken relationship. |
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