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Advice on first MFM
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I (James) am currently arranging the first MFM session for Marie, and want it to be an amazing experience for her.
Whilst we've played with other couples before, I'm expecting this to be a different dynamic. Are there any tips from peoples experience that they would pass on?
Currently we're at the point of choosing the right guy, and are lining up drinks with a few men to choose the right one (and we'd like to have a few lined up for future ones), so any "interview" tips would be great too!
Thanks
J x
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By *andbCouple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
Take your time in choosing the right one and don't settle for second best. Be comfortable with whoever you choose and go with your gut instinct. Be yourselves and don't have too much to drink.
Good luck in choosing the right person x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I (James) am currently arranging the first MFM session for Marie, and want it to be an amazing experience for her.
Whilst we've played with other couples before, I'm expecting this to be a different dynamic. Are there any tips from peoples experience that they would pass on?
Currently we're at the point of choosing the right guy, and are lining up drinks with a few men to choose the right one (and we'd like to have a few lined up for future ones), so any "interview" tips would be great too!
Thanks
J x
" all my mfm meets have been very sexy even if they were nervous that excited me more somehow,good luck,your wife looks amazing james |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Take your time in choosing the right one and don't settle for second best. Be comfortable with whoever you choose and go with your gut instinct. Be yourselves and don't have too much to drink.
Good luck in choosing the right person x" yes agree with the drinking thing not a good look or smell ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just go with the flow
Dont overthink it or you wont enjoy it.
This
And don't treat it like an interview" eg hi how are you what are your views on the current economic upturn |
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I know single guys are in plentiful numbers here but they aren't a commodity to be lined up or interviewed. My first tip would be to treat the men you meet as equal participants who have a choice just as much as you two do. If someone talked about single women like this there would be uproar.
Your partner will know if she finds a guy physically attractive in the first few seconds, the drink will establish if you both like him. The rest will be determined when you play.
Ensure he is aware of any boundaries you have and ensure you know where his lay.
Other than that if all three of you hit it off, enjoy. |
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By *kmanMan
over a year ago
Letterkenny |
"I know single guys are in plentiful numbers here but they aren't a commodity to be lined up or interviewed. My first tip would be to treat the men you meet as equal participants who have a choice just as much as you two do. If someone talked about single women like this there would be uproar.
Your partner will know if she finds a guy physically attractive in the first few seconds, the drink will establish if you both like him. The rest will be determined when you play.
Ensure he is aware of any boundaries you have and ensure you know where his lay.
Other than that if all three of you hit it off, enjoy."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Take your time in choosing and a undertake several socials before any play
Try and find experience but willing to go with range flow " yes and have a points system and an annotated diagram so that you can keep on top of your deliberations |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for your replies everyone! We'll enjoy the socials and see who connects best (and yes, the guys are equals in that, I think some people have misinterpreted my meaning..).
And yes, Marie is amazing, I know I'm a very lucky man..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just picked up on this .....
I am pretty sure the OP is now overran with messages from guys telling saying "chose me" etc etc......however my advice is
1. Agree between you both, what are your expectations
2. TOTALLY agree up the shape/size/fitness etc of your intended mate
3. ALWAYS meet for a social away from home, you can always take them back afterwards
4. Make sure you both want the same
Not rocket science really, just common sense
J xx
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just picked up on this .....
I am pretty sure the OP is now overran with messages from guys telling saying "chose me" etc etc......however my advice is
1. Agree between you both, what are your expectations
2. TOTALLY agree up the shape/size/fitness etc of your intended mate
3. ALWAYS meet for a social away from home, you can always take them back afterwards
4. Make sure you both want the same
Not rocket science really, just common sense
J xx
"
Thanks Jon. That pretty much covers where we are to be honest. 1, 2 and 4 are agreed , and we've talked it through multiple times. We're also doing the socials completely separately (different day) to any meet.
And yes, our messages and weeks are a little busy this morning! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just picked up on this .....
I am pretty sure the OP is now overran with messages from guys telling saying "chose me" etc etc......however my advice is
1. Agree between you both, what are your expectations
2. TOTALLY agree up the shape/size/fitness etc of your intended mate
3. ALWAYS meet for a social away from home, you can always take them back afterwards
4. Make sure you both want the same
Not rocket science really, just common sense
J xx
Thanks Jon. That pretty much covers where we are to be honest. 1, 2 and 4 are agreed , and we've talked it through multiple times. We're also doing the socials completely separately (different day) to any meet.
And yes, our messages and weeks are a little busy this morning! "
be safe be happy - but remember "life is for living, as we are a long time dead" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi Jamesmarie
We had our first MMF a few weeks back and yes the dynamic is slightly different. Nothing wrong with meeting socially first, you can then go away and talk about it. As others have said though, when you arrange to take things further just be prepared to go with the flow a bit as it might not go as planned so be flexible, open, have fun and talk to one another. Example for us - I wanted to see 'A' get fucked sooner by him as that's my thing but 'A' was happy receiving a bit more oral first so I needed to be more patient and let things progress lol. I would also say let the woman lead too. You'll both enjoy it though, as always as it's your first MMF talk afterwards too. Good luck, sure you'll be inundated with candidates x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi Jamesmarie
We had our first MMF a few weeks back and yes the dynamic is slightly different. Nothing wrong with meeting socially first, you can then go away and talk about it. As others have said though, when you arrange to take things further just be prepared to go with the flow a bit as it might not go as planned so be flexible, open, have fun and talk to one another. Example for us - I wanted to see 'A' get fucked sooner by him as that's my thing but 'A' was happy receiving a bit more oral first so I needed to be more patient and let things progress lol. I would also say let the woman lead too. You'll both enjoy it though, as always as it's your first MMF talk afterwards too. Good luck, sure you'll be inundated with candidates x"
Thanks MT69, that's good advice.. Xx |
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We'd reiterate the one about drink / alcohol not generally having a place in a scenario where you are selecting very imminent sexual interactions.
"Go with your instinct" sounds very much right with us.
We have found articulate admirers who repeatedly affirm their sentiments to be good when tested - very pleasant socials and massively filled condoms. Guys who are very much looking forward to meeting you can / will store up days / weeks of sperm - the male body permits you to do that... Can be a real treat... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's good to make sure you both agree roughly how you want it to go - how active are you going to be- trying DP vs you just watching, what your hard limits are, that sort of thing- and look for someone who enjoys a meet of that sort. There are an astonishing number of single guys who say they want an mfm but then don't want G actually involved so that's pretty fundamental.
If it's your first maybe look for guys who've had 3some experience, that's what we did and it made our first time much easier.
After that just enjoy the socials and see who you both feel comfortable with. |
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By *rwolfMan
over a year ago
bristol |
Prior
Planning
Prevents
Piss
Poor
Performance
Talk, talk, talk and talk... Personal boundaries might be different for a MMF as to playing with a couple.
Meet the prospectives and talk, talk and talk... End of the day you want it to be fun for both of you once things are sorting just relax and go with it... Its better to start of with things in place and relax them rather than just go all in hell for leather and something go wrong
Either way i hope it works out for you both |
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We have done ours at a club. It is so hard using fab to find single guys because there are so many!
It sounds like you've got it well in hand, but try not to overthink it or build it up 'too' much, if you know what I mean, it has to remain fun
I'm sure you'll enjoy it and she'll have an indulgent time |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for all the advice.. To be honest we were probably taking it too carefully and losing the fun from the process.. We've talked and we're just having fun now.
Marie has full choice over who we choose.. Assuming the man wants to join us!!
Our boundaries are defined. I've noticed that some people say to give Marie control, but she is very submissive and I'm thinking she will get lot more from it if I take control as normal.. Marie gets ultimate control through safewords though. Any thoughts from people in a similar situation?
The meet is out there now, we are really excited, and looking forward to a wonderful experience!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One thing I would add is it might be best to go with a man that has experience with a couple " oh yes see where your coming from coz theirs another man with an erect penis and they may touch |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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james, look for a old fat ugly guy with a fat cock , then you wont be so jealous when you watch him fuck your partner , as its an hotel meet line up at least three guys as most get cold feet and not turn up. also think on videoing the meet so you can both watch it later. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One thing I would add is it might be best to go with a man that has experience with a couple "
I agree with _ady lick. As it's your first time you want it to be amazing.
But the main point, something that happens a lot and is sooo frustrating is MAKE SURE THE GUY CAN GET A HARD ON! ask him if he has had any performance issues/stage fright.
A lot of guys talk the talk, but in reality can't perform due to nervous about ....
whatever! You want to spend your mfm having a fucking good time, not trying to make the single guy feel relaxed so he can perform! Have fun x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Haha, we'll be finding the sexiest guy we can! Marie has a thing for dark featured Norweigans if there are any reading this..
The point about being able to keep it up is good, i guess that's where previous experience and veris comes in... |
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"Haha, we'll be finding the sexiest guy we can! Marie has a thing for dark featured Norweigans if there are any reading this..
The point about being able to keep it up is good, i guess that's where previous experience and veris comes in..."
A dark featured Norwegian??!
Good luck ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Haha, we'll be finding the sexiest guy we can! Marie has a thing for dark featured Norweigans if there are any reading this..
The point about being able to keep it up is good, i guess that's where previous experience and veris comes in...
A dark featured Norwegian??!
Good luck !"
Basically Morten Harket... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"james, look for a old fat ugly guy with a fat cock , then you wont be so jealous when you watch him fuck your partner , as its an hotel meet line up at least three guys as most get cold feet and not turn up. also think on videoing the meet so you can both watch it later. "
I can safely say I don't fuck fat old ugly guys and G manages not to get jealous. If you're the sort of person who'd struggle with jealousy I'd suggest swinging with a partner isn't for you.
Don't worry about lining up alternates, in our experience even with hotel meets if you've picked wisely you won't need them. If out was a gangbang it would be a different story.
If you want to video make sure you ask the other guy, don't get yourself in trouble. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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After the initial conversation we just went with the flow tbh. We were lucky as our playmate was very respectful and stuck to our boundaries. What impressed me most was how it was all about me... Needless to say we all had fun.
Tom loved it, and I loved how watching me made him feel.
Trust your instincts, make expectations from all sides clear.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks guys for your advice.
Sounds like if we get to the planning of a gangbang later on (it's on her list..) then I've more work to do! "
Mmmmmmmmmmmm someone mention a gangbang mmmmmmmmmm |
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