FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Best time to tell?
Best time to tell?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So Ive been seeing a lady the last few weeks, she's not on fab and was wanting to tell her about it, I know she will be fine with it saying as we both agreed on an open relationship, I'd just love to invite her to the world of fab but not sure on how to do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Put wild things or black swan on the tv, see if she gets a little hot and bothered by the lesbian scenes
Discus it with her, ask her about her sexual experiences first maybe
Find out if she's got any fantasies then help her with them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've always ended up with shit after that, judgement and or them tying to use u for a ffm one off !
Erm no thanks bye lol"
In all honesty i told one girl about this site, this lifestyle. She called me a perv an i never saw her again! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Put wild things or black swan on the tv, see if she gets a little hot and bothered by the lesbian scenes
Discus it with her, ask her about her sexual experiences first maybe
Find out if she's got any fantasies then help her with them "
Good advice! Thanks!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've always ended up with shit after that, judgement and or them tying to use u for a ffm one off !
Erm no thanks bye lol
In all honesty i told one girl about this site, this lifestyle. She called me a perv an i neverr saw her again! "
This is what exactly I would be afraid off! Lol |
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"So Ive been seeing a lady the last few weeks, she's not on fab and was wanting to tell her about it, I know she will be fine with it saying as we both agreed on an open relationship, I'd just love to invite her to the world of fab but not sure on how to do it"
If you know she would be fine with it what's stopping you?
If you've agreed to an open relationship it won't come as a surprise I wouldn't have thought. |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"So Ive been seeing a lady the last few weeks, she's not on fab and was wanting to tell her about it, I know she will be fine with it saying as we both agreed on an open relationship, I'd just love to invite her to the world of fab but not sure on how to do it"
I always tell people before I go on a first date with someone that I'm not planning on being monogamous. I tell people that includes casual sex as well as more intimate relationships. |
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In my personal experience telling anyone vanilla about this site doesn’t work out well, unless they wanna use you for a FFM only
In fact (and also in my experience) as a single fem wanting a swingers relationship even on here is frowned upon by a lot of guys as they don’t want to be with a woman that’s a “slag”
That’s the double edged sword we ladies dance upon |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In my personal experience telling anyone vanilla about this site doesn’t work out well, unless they wanna use you for a FFM only
In fact (and also in my experience) as a single fem wanting a swingers relationship even on here is frowned upon by a lot of guys as they don’t want to be with a woman that’s a “slag”
That’s the double edged sword we ladies dance upon "
Double standards still rule!! |
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"In my personal experience telling anyone vanilla about this site doesn’t work out well, unless they wanna use you for a FFM only
In fact (and also in my experience) as a single fem wanting a swingers relationship even on here is frowned upon by a lot of guys as they don’t want to be with a woman that’s a “slag”
That’s the double edged sword we ladies dance upon
Double standards still rule!! "
Yes, I think they do, both ways. Quite a few women wouldn't want a swingers relationship with a guy from here.
I would always be honest about what I wanted from a relationship from day one. It's never easy three months down the line to tell a person something that you've known all along and by that time you're bothered more invested in the relationship. If something is going to be a deal breaker get said straight away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In my personal experience telling anyone vanilla about this site doesn’t work out well, unless they wanna use you for a FFM only
In fact (and also in my experience) as a single fem wanting a swingers relationship even on here is frowned upon by a lot of guys as they don’t want to be with a woman that’s a “slag”
That’s the double edged sword we ladies dance upon
Double standards still rule!! "
I would rather tell them and them walk away than be with anyone that would think like that! |
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"In my personal experience telling anyone vanilla about this site doesn’t work out well, unless they wanna use you for a FFM only
In fact (and also in my experience) as a single fem wanting a swingers relationship even on here is frowned upon by a lot of guys as they don’t want to be with a woman that’s a “slag”
That’s the double edged sword we ladies dance upon
Double standards still rule!!
I would rather tell them and them walk away than be with anyone that would think like that!"
Well yes that’s generally what I’ve been doing up to now but I was merely answering that being honest about what I want handy ended well for me |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
I think it depends what you want long term. If I meet people off the site I do tell them pretty much straight away so that they know exactly what I'm like. If it is not for them that is perfectly ok, although most people have been somewhat intrigued and wanted to try a club. |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
But there is no relationship that could work me with anybody new, that didn't involve a sharing aspect to it, where as some people are looking to settle down with someone, so their choices may be very different to mine, as their needs are likely to be also different to mine.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Without being disrespectful to the single fems contributions on here. I do think it's different for guys admitting they are swingers than us girls admitting to it.
My hubby (before we met)used to tell vanillas on the first date, so he was getting the subject out in the open. He figured if they were ok or even better interested, then that woman would be a good match for him. In fact he reckons he's converted a few women from pof to fab!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You need to be honest with her, sooner rather than later. Ask her about her sexual fantasies whilst you are having intimate moments, tell her to be totally open and honest and see what she answers with. That should give you an idea of how she may respond.
We hope you get the result you're hoping for, as it would be difficult to give up this lifestyle if it's something you thoroughly enjoy. |
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first woman I suggested she join here, her response was "what do you take me for??". She joined about 4 weeks later and 5 years later she is on here with here current BF and has been - so go figure! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've always ended up with shit after that, judgement and or them tying to use u for a ffm one off !
Erm no thanks bye lol
In all honesty i told one girl about this site, this lifestyle. She called me a perv an i never saw her again! "
seriously |
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"Update: so I've showed her fab and she is all for it!
Says she would like to try soft swing first and maybe try a club! Couldn't have went better!  "
Aaah I'm actually dead chuffed for you.
Hope you both have fun x |
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"My advice from trying to do this with non fab guys is don't bother 
"
totally agreed ! Always I tried failed ! People critise your choices and don't understand ! But is your relationship you should know better . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Update: so I've showed her fab and she is all for it!
Says she would like to try soft swing first and maybe try a club! Couldn't have went better!
Aaah I'm actually dead chuffed for you.
Hope you both have fun
x"
Thanks so much! Gonna be a naughty Christmas! X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Update: so I've showed her fab and she is all for it!
Says she would like to try soft swing first and maybe try a club! Couldn't have went better!
Aaah I'm actually dead chuffed for you.
Hope you both have fun
x
Thanks so much! Gonna be a naughty Christmas! X"
Woohoo! Well done!! |
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