FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > How do you know if swingings for you?
How do you know if swingings for you?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I've been on and off for a while had some fantastic meets etc but recently met a guy who I instantly clicked with and spoke to for months seems we were looking to try the same stuff so talked him into also joining here and had arranged a mff 3sum from there things rapidly went downhill from just wanting to then be friends to know being friends is not an option I feel stupid but also feel like a massive kick in the teeth and can't help but wonder if Iam really that bad it's made me question if Iam really set out for swinging I've enjoyed a club visit and meets but now not sure if this is for me or not or if this is just a bump in the road where I let myself get too attached ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been on and off for a while had some fantastic meets etc but recently met a guy who I instantly clicked with and spoke to for months seems we were looking to try the same stuff so talked him into also joining here and had arranged a mff 3sum from there things rapidly went downhill from just wanting to then be friends to know being friends is not an option I feel stupid but also feel like a massive kick in the teeth and can't help but wonder if Iam really that bad it's made me question if Iam really set out for swinging I've enjoyed a club visit and meets but now not sure if this is for me or not or if this is just a bump in the road where I let myself get too attached ?"
Did you have the Threesome? What do you mean things went downhill, from which side?
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By *issVeryWoman
over a year ago
streatham |
The guy's behaviour, reaction, and him not wanting to be friends anymore has nothing to do with whether you are a swinger or not. It just obviously wasn't a match. Just because a coupling fails, don't doubt yourself and question your entire lifestyle choice. Clearly, he wasn't for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You will never know if someone just wants the sex part. In my years of being on here, and other online sites, I have found most men don't want the friendship. You can keep looking for one who does, and suffer the rest, or give up. I like the sex part; the friendship isn't important, so it works for me. Although, I have met a few regular partners on here.
Bottom line is, are you someone who gives up at the first hurdle? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The guy's behaviour, reaction, and him not wanting to be friends anymore has nothing to do with whether you are a swinger or not. It just obviously wasn't a match. Just because a coupling fails, don't doubt yourself and question your entire lifestyle choice. Clearly, he wasn't for you. "
What she said  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yeh we had a 3sum which we all enjoyed I think then next day he decided he couldn't do the fuck buddy which I respected but now we can't be friends either with no reason given after 8month of talking I thought he was nice canny and genuine etc trusted him now Iam just questioning everything x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yeh I suppose I've met lads that have been one offand others that have been regular and actually mad some friends but for some reason this one has totally thrown me as I was very open and honest and trusting I suppose now Iam unsure if Iam subconsciously wanting more than I've realised of if Iam just letting it get me down Iam good at hiding my lack in confidence but now Iam analysing my whole body again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I've been on and off for a while had some fantastic meets etc but recently met a guy who I instantly clicked with and spoke to for months seems we were looking to try the same stuff so talked him into also joining here and had arranged a mff 3sum from there things rapidly went downhill from just wanting to then be friends to know being friends is not an option I feel stupid but also feel like a massive kick in the teeth and can't help but wonder if Iam really that bad it's made me question if Iam really set out for swinging I've enjoyed a club visit and meets but now not sure if this is for me or not or if this is just a bump in the road where I let myself get too attached ?"
well if you dont get dizzy I figure its ok
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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try the slides first , then the roundabouts , then the swings , see if you like swinging best ...
no idea whats swinging about it ....
its just people that love sex , and carrying out fantasies , or just having open minded adult fun |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"Yeh we had a 3sum which we all enjoyed I think then next day he decided he couldn't do the fuck buddy which I respected but now we can't be friends either with no reason given after 8month of talking I thought he was nice canny and genuine etc trusted him now Iam just questioning everything x"
i'm cynical as fuck now but i think he used you to fulfil his fantasies. men can keep lies things going for longer than 8 months, i know this from experience.
if you enjoyed things before him and don't enjoy them now you could just be grieving the friendship you had and will enjoy them in the future when you're ready to. he also might have had an adverse affect where you associate everything you enjoyed with him as gonna let you down now because he has let you down.
i've always known swinging isn't for me, i'm not voyeuristic or into anything more than 3sums with 2 guys. i think it can appeal to some people and they try it and they don't enjoy it, but if you enjoyed it recently and only this guy letting you down is the factor in why you're questioning yourself then you still might be into it and just don't want this shitty experience you've had with him with anyone else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As said he unfortunately used you for a threesome. Swinging is a hobby, hobbies can change don't worry.
Be prepared to be let down its the unfortunate nature of people.
Most single guys we've come across are interested in shag and leave! |
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