FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Im not having much luck on here
Im not having much luck on here
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it realy as hard as it seems 2 meet new women on here as im actualy a true genuine good decent guy who is looking 4 some fun but all that i seem 2 get is ignord
can any body tell me were im going wrong ?? |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
luck.. what ya think it is... the bookies?
have you been to a social?
have you been to a club near you?
have you offered to travel further afield?
do you post a regular in the forums to get known
do you chat in the chatrooms?
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"Is it realy as hard as it seems 2 meet new women on here as im actualy a true genuine good decent guy who is looking 4 some fun but all that i seem 2 get is ignord
can any body tell me were im going wrong ?? "
"a true genuine good decent guy" ... not having a go but that's surely how you see yourself, ie, an opinion - how others may see you could very well be the opposite. Soem call me a twat, some call me arrogant, but that's their opinion.
What would you do to get their opinion and your opinion to match? |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
To the OP....try and concentrate on the positives and not the negatives...and that includes any negative advice that you may recieve.
If you are into socials, try one, join in on the forums, upload some new pics ( they will go in the gallery so will get your profile noticed if they like the pic )use the chatrooms.
We all have our own way of meeting, but if you use one that you prefer you may get some luck.
Good luck, although you don't seem to be doing too bad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it realy as hard as it seems 2 meet new women on here as im actualy a true genuine good decent guy who is looking 4 some fun but all that i seem 2 get is ignord
can any body tell me were im going wrong ?? "
Your doing nothing wrong mate!
You dont have a problem.
The problem is with the people that ignore you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First swinging site i ever joined there was no forums to shout for advice, you just had to plod away hoping the next message might get a positive reply,thats how it goes,weeks and months of nothingness tends to up the appreciation of creating a meet. |
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I agree with the others, man. Doesn't seem to be anything 'wrong' with on you. The advice on here about going
to socials, adding on forums, being in
chat, and placing new pics, is so good
it should the law on fabs. And try to
chill out! lol |
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Op you look like you are doing ok to me. See other threads about why mail isn't always replied to. Apart from some spelling mistakes and a little text speak which may annoy a few it looks ok. Don't worry about the no replies. Just read profiles carefully, mail individually and don't lower your standards. Good luck.
Mistress x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
"
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not, in my opinion, if they have 100+ emails, have just finished a 12 hour shift, and have'nt got the necessary time to plod through each one saying "no thanks". It's never happened to me, but has and is to a good friend of mine. Bulk delete is the only answer. If it happens to you, suck it up, and move on. Shit happens. |
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your profile looks fine,you have had some meets with good veris,so thats a plus,as I have said before and so have others,you could join your local club,or attent a social,so that you get to meet other swingers.also bear in mind single women will get lots of msgs daily,so keep trying xx mrs a sexy |
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"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
"
if someone who reads our profile and is interested, takes the time to message, is polite and respectful first thing we will do is check thier profile.
if they are gay, bi, or bi curious over or under our age range or anything other than white, we delete without reply.
why ? cos they may have read the profile but not took any notice of what it says.
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
if someone who reads our profile and is interested, takes the time to message, is polite and respectful first thing we will do is check thier profile.
if they are gay, bi, or bi curious over or under our age range or anything other than white, we delete without reply.
why ? cos they may have read the profile but not took any notice of what it says.
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them"
+1
My friend's profile clearly states that she is currently not meeting anyone new. Over lunch today she received a mail from someone wanting to know did she want a lunchtime f**k. And people wonder... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
if someone who reads our profile and is interested, takes the time to message, is polite and respectful first thing we will do is check thier profile.
if they are gay, bi, or bi curious over or under our age range or anything other than white, we delete without reply.
why ? cos they may have read the profile but not took any notice of what it says.
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them
+1
My friend's profile clearly states that she is currently not meeting anyone new. Over lunch today she received a mail from someone wanting to know did she want a lunchtime f**k. And people wonder..."
I agree. If people dont read your profile then of course delete.
I am talking about the people that do read and reply to adds!
Dont forget though that we may miss something on the profile. After all we are human and do make mistakes |
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"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
if someone who reads our profile and is interested, takes the time to message, is polite and respectful first thing we will do is check thier profile.
if they are gay, bi, or bi curious over or under our age range or anything other than white, we delete without reply.
why ? cos they may have read the profile but not took any notice of what it says.
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them
+1
My friend's profile clearly states that she is currently not meeting anyone new. Over lunch today she received a mail from someone wanting to know did she want a lunchtime f**k. And people wonder...
I agree. If people dont read your profile then of course delete.
I am talking about the people that do read and reply to adds!
Dont forget though that we may miss something on the profile. After all we are human and do make mistakes "
no disrespect to any one, but our profile clearly states we are straight and wont meet any one who is anything but, also no black guys, asians etc.
we get mails from looked at your profile and think you are just what im looking for.
which i think translates to ive looked at your pics and id like a fuck.
if we are only human as you suggest, i wonder sometimes but, surely if its there in black and white its impossible to miss if they do as they say read the profile not look for pics.
Another example is, we live in Benidorm Spain, and the number of people who ask can they meet us that night, are we free that afternoon !!!
For gods sake its hard enough for the majority of guys on here as it is but some of them dont even give themselves a chance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the root of the issue is that the endless dickheads who can't / won't read spoil it for the few who do read profiles and take the time to compose a decent, literate mail. The ladies and couples who receive an endless stream of crap quite rightly bulk delete, which is of course unfair on the minority. How this can be resolved, I have no idea. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
if someone who reads our profile and is interested, takes the time to message, is polite and respectful first thing we will do is check thier profile.
if they are gay, bi, or bi curious over or under our age range or anything other than white, we delete without reply.
why ? cos they may have read the profile but not took any notice of what it says.
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them
+1
My friend's profile clearly states that she is currently not meeting anyone new. Over lunch today she received a mail from someone wanting to know did she want a lunchtime f**k. And people wonder...
I agree. If people dont read your profile then of course delete.
I am talking about the people that do read and reply to adds!
Dont forget though that we may miss something on the profile. After all we are human and do make mistakes
no disrespect to any one, but our profile clearly states we are straight and wont meet any one who is anything but, also no black guys, asians etc.
we get mails from looked at your profile and think you are just what im looking for.
which i think translates to ive looked at your pics and id like a fuck.
if we are only human as you suggest, i wonder sometimes but, surely if its there in black and white its impossible to miss if they do as they say read the profile not look for pics.
Another example is, we live in Benidorm Spain, and the number of people who ask can they meet us that night, are we free that afternoon !!!
For gods sake its hard enough for the majority of guys on here as it is but some of them dont even give themselves a chance."
I know. Its a shame. some people dont have alot upstairs in the brain dept.
Maybe we should just feel sorry for them! I am just talking about the people that can use the grey matter though. No offence to anyone! X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
"
Whoa! A whole load of assumption there fella: are you his social secretary?!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them"
Ouch! Harsh: but when you're right, you're right! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
why do some guys seem to think that people want to spend time all be it a quick message replying to thicko's who dont read dont understand or dont think a person be it couple or singles profile wants etc dont apply to them.
anyone who receives unsolicited messages from people who dont fit the criteia on thier profile is well within thier rights to ignore the sender, personally would prefer to tell them to fuck off but cant be arsed to waste time on them
Ouch! Harsh: but when you're right, you're right! "
Ummm yes well you obviously never read my post! I never said anything about replying to thicko's did I ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, you never did, but how do you spot the few good guys?
Scenario: a woman or couple have a few good, reliable, playmates, and want maybe one or two more, but aren't in a hurry to find them. They receive maybe 100 emails a day. Do they waste playtime studying all of these mails, one by one, or just bulk delete and go out to play? No brainer, and the few decent emails get caught in the crossfire. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, you never did, but how do you spot the few good guys?
Scenario: a woman or couple have a few good, reliable, playmates, and want maybe one or two more, but aren't in a hurry to find them. They receive maybe 100 emails a day. Do they waste playtime studying all of these mails, one by one, or just bulk delete and go out to play? No brainer, and the few decent emails get caught in the crossfire."
Well to some extent I do see your point.
You can spot the good guys/girls with a bit of effort on both sides!
But just look at the post 2 above this from "Sassymissuk"
She couldn't be botherd to read my post properly before replying.
I guess she will delete loads of good potential playmates when they have put in the effort to write to her cause she cant be arsed to read them.
Just the sort of person I am talking about!
"Ouch! Harsh: but when you're right, you're right" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
The problem is with the people that ignore you.
Just out of curiosity, in what way do the people who "ignore" the OP have a problem?
They have a problem because -
If someone reads your profile, takes the time to write to you, is polite, takes an interest in you and is respectful; then it,s very rude and lazy just to hit the delete key!
"
Go to FAQ
Read what admin say to the following....
"There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friend's profile clearly states that she is currently not meeting anyone new. Over lunch today she received a mail from someone wanting to know did she want a lunchtime f**k. And people wonder..."
I've had this too. It's infuriating. Even when I've hidden my profile because I'm not meeting anyone at the time, I've continued to have a full inbox from men asking me to meet them at short notice.
I know the OP messaged me a while back and I deleted with no reply. My reasons were not being a match with my interests and the heavy textspeak in his profile - I find the latter really offputting and I do use it to filter out people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friend's profile clearly states that she is currently not meeting anyone new. Over lunch today she received a mail from someone wanting to know did she want a lunchtime f**k. And people wonder...
I've had this too. It's infuriating. Even when I've hidden my profile because I'm not meeting anyone at the time, I've continued to have a full inbox from men asking me to meet them at short notice.
I know the OP messaged me a while back and I deleted with no reply. My reasons were not being a match with my interests and the heavy textspeak in his profile - I find the latter really offputting and I do use it to filter out people. "
+1 (getting to be a habit, this) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, you never did, but how do you spot the few good guys?
Scenario: a woman or couple have a few good, reliable, playmates, and want maybe one or two more, but aren't in a hurry to find them. They receive maybe 100 emails a day. Do they waste playtime studying all of these mails, one by one, or just bulk delete and go out to play? No brainer, and the few decent emails get caught in the crossfire.
Well to some extent I do see your point.
You can spot the good guys/girls with a bit of effort on both sides!
But just look at the post 2 above this from "Sassymissuk"
She couldn't be botherd to read my post properly before replying.
I guess she will delete loads of good potential playmates when they have put in the effort to write to her cause she cant be arsed to read them.
Just the sort of person I am talking about!
"Ouch! Harsh: but when you're right, you're right" "
You've lost me as my response was to Bagman and not you...but since you've obviously read more into it than I...hey ho! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, you never did, but how do you spot the few good guys?
Scenario: a woman or couple have a few good, reliable, playmates, and want maybe one or two more, but aren't in a hurry to find them. They receive maybe 100 emails a day. Do they waste playtime studying all of these mails, one by one, or just bulk delete and go out to play? No brainer, and the few decent emails get caught in the crossfire.
Well to some extent I do see your point.
You can spot the good guys/girls with a bit of effort on both sides!
But just look at the post 2 above this from "Sassymissuk"
She couldn't be botherd to read my post properly before replying.
I guess she will delete loads of good potential playmates when they have put in the effort to write to her cause she cant be arsed to read them.
Just the sort of person I am talking about!
"Ouch! Harsh: but when you're right, you're right"
You've lost me as my response was to Bagman and not you...but since you've obviously read more into it than I...hey ho! "
Sorry |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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you are not the only one ,i have been off ,and on here for nearly 4yrs ,and in those four years, i can count the meets on one hand,i am on by myself,and also with my hubby,but when you are on this by yourself it is a lot harder |
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By *day24Man
over a year ago
leicester |
Its even harder when you a gay guy who's curious about sex with a woman, trying to find a bi or bicurious male with a gf or wife. I've messaged people asked for a chat be fore we say yes to a meet and they don't even reply. But I'm still going to keep looking |
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By *obletonMan
over a year ago
A Home Among The Woodland Creatures |
"Is it realy as hard as it seems 2 meet new women on here as im actualy a true genuine good decent guy who is looking 4 some fun but all that i seem 2 get is ignord
can any body tell me were im going wrong ?? "
You only THINK that you are having a hard time when in fact you aren't.
You have had at least 3 meets.
most people who join this site never get a single one
so quit whinging |
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Your profile has some more detail than many do, which is good. As it's a swinging site, then you could consider inclusion in your written profile that you're open to meet couples, as it seems to state atm that you're looking for females. Whilst females will be part of a couple, you may be discouraging couples as you don't mention them there. If you've got swinging experience, this may also be useful to add in, as newcomers, and those who are just starting out, often find it a touch more difficult.
As with everything, persistence helps - as does flexibility. If you find something that works, do more of it, and likewise, if there's something that's maybe not working so well, experiment. Explore options of the site that you maybe haven't tried: such as the meets and events page, where you could organise social/other meets etc.
Adding more photos allows others to get a better perspective of you, so that they can better tell if you're matched. It's better to have a smaller number of meets that are fantastic than meets where people aren't really compatible, or the fun isn't so good etc.
There's a numbers thing too - the more people that know you, you message with etc, the higher the potential for success.
As others point out, being courteous and showing manners etc, is highly respected, as it shows respect too.
There are some good tips posted to this, and the forums have other ideas too. Keep chatting and connecting with people, we're a sociable bunch, largely. |
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