FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Am I being too sensitive?
Am I being too sensitive?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I met guy for a social over a coffee last week which seemed to go very well. Said he was interested in meeting up to play and so was I.
Agreed that we would hook up daytime one week day as per our,profile, He said that it would take him a little while to sort time off but would meet up when he could.
Not a problem with us, we just needed a day or two notice and we could arrange.
This morning he messages me to say he can meet today. Very short notice that I couldn't do, but I could do Friday or Monday I replied.
Hes reply was would play soon
Within the same hour he puts up a status message that seems to indicate he's going to meet someone and an hour ago he got another verification showing on his summary.
Ok, so I am not in a relationship with him, nor do I want one, but really feel like I have a slap in face.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From our view he was free to day at last minute and messaged you ,but you were unavailable and found an alternative meet no more but just our opinion,would you of not done similar if you could |
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Yes you're being too sensitive. This is swinging, he couldn't meet you (yet gave you the opportunity) so he arranged to meet someone else. He owes you nothing in terms of exclusivity.
Even so we cant help how we feel. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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i do the same thing. if i want sex i will have sex. there's some guys i'll ask first before looking and if they can't make it i put a status up.
he asked you firstly don't forget, i think it's unreasonable for you to think he should not have sex when he can. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mmmm
He offered to play, you couldn't meet so he found someone else to play with, can't see the problem, after all both of you have no emotional attachment, relationship or agreement and you shouldn't have, after all you are married.
Meet him when both of you're diares coincide, in the meantime go have some fun, just like he is doing, isn't that what swinging is about? Fun? X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I met guy for a social over a coffee last week which seemed to go very well. Said he was interested in meeting up to play and so was I.
Agreed that we would hook up daytime one week day as per our,profile, He said that it would take him a little while to sort time off but would meet up when he could.
Not a problem with us, we just needed a day or two notice and we could arrange.
This morning he messages me to say he can meet today. Very short notice that I couldn't do, but I could do Friday or Monday I replied.
Hes reply was would play soon
Within the same hour he puts up a status message that seems to indicate he's going to meet someone and an hour ago he got another verification showing on his summary.
Ok, so I am not in a relationship with him, nor do I want one, but really feel like I have a slap in face.
"
Will you play with him if he asks again ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Within the same hour he puts up a status message that seems to indicate he's going to meet someone and an hour ago he got another verification showing on his summary.
"
Are you implying that he flaunted his alternative arrangements for your "benefit"? He gave you first refusal as many have pointed out, perhaps you can concentrate on that.
I think most of us like to feel that we are "special" and it can be hard to accept that on some occasions we are actually interchangeable  The more you compartmentalise the better you'll feel - what people do when they're not with you is not your business, has no impact and is no reflection on you. Take nothing personally. |
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"Yes you're being too sensitive. This is swinging, he couldn't meet you (yet gave you the opportunity) so he arranged to meet someone else. He owes you nothing in terms of exclusivity.
Even so we cant help how we feel."
This  |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
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He had the courtesy to message and make sue you still couldn't meet as he knew you could only meet Mon and Fridays. He doesn't owe you anything but checked anyway. Is someone to abstain and stay exclusive to someone they are not in a relationship with in the hope you will follow through and meet with them? If it was the other way around, would you postpone any attempt to meet until he could? You're being too sensitive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I met guy for a social over a coffee last week which seemed to go very well. Said he was interested in meeting up to play and so was I.
Agreed that we would hook up daytime one week day as per our,profile, He said that it would take him a little while to sort time off but would meet up when he could.
Not a problem with us, we just needed a day or two notice and we could arrange.
This morning he messages me to say he can meet today. Very short notice that I couldn't do, but I could do Friday or Monday I replied.
Hes reply was would play soon
Within the same hour he puts up a status message that seems to indicate he's going to meet someone and an hour ago he got another verification showing on his summary.
Ok, so I am not in a relationship with him, nor do I want one, but really feel like I have a slap in face.
"
why...he asked if you were free...you said no...
End of
Has he to wait about for when you are ?
He saw an opertunity to play and took it
Good on him
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see a problem. You should feel good that he gave you first refusal, that means he does want to play as he as not made excuses not to play. You turned him down because you was not free to meet, and in turn he found someone who could meet. Hope he doesn't read the forum as he may decide not to meet with you. Hope you can manage to arrange play time |
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"So you couldn't meet him today and he found someone that could?
Yes you're being sensitive.
Agreed, tbh if he asked you first take it as a compliment x"
. We can't be too sensitive if we're going to be on this site I'm afraid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So you couldn't meet him today and he found someone that could?
Yes you're being sensitive.
Agreed, tbh if he asked you first take it as a compliment x
. We can't be too sensitive if we're going to be on this site I'm afraid."
To be honest there is no guarantee he asked the OP fist |
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"So you couldn't meet him today and he found someone that could?
Yes you're being sensitive.
Agreed, tbh if he asked you first take it as a compliment x
. We can't be too sensitive if we're going to be on this site I'm afraid.
To be honest there is no guarantee he asked the OP fist "
Oh come on play nice 
She was definitely asked first.... |
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