FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > My aggressive profile.
My aggressive profile.
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
Did a man say that to you by any chance?
You certainly don't mince your words. You come across as a woman who knows what she wants and who wouldn't take any bullshit. Nothing wrong with that, but a lot of guys wouldn't be able to handle that!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not aggressive, it's bullshit proof.
I made my profile "less aggresive" and it's encouraged all sorts of bullshit to be dumped in my inbox...I'd put my profile back to how it was but I can't rambert what I said  |
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"Did a man say that to you by any chance?
You certainly don't mince your words. You come across as a woman who knows what she wants and who wouldn't take any bullshit. Nothing wrong with that, but a lot of guys wouldn't be able to handle that!!! "
I'm getting a lot of interest in men who regard themselves as sub and want me to take them on.
What I want is the complete opposite. |
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"It's not aggressive, it's bullshit proof.
I made my profile "less aggresive" and it's encouraged all sorts of bullshit to be dumped in my inbox...I'd put my profile back to how it was but I can't rambert what I said "
Oh my days, I checked yours out and thought you were my daughter! Your mouth/chin picture is her double. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Aggressive? Nah.
Blunt and direct? Yep 
I get why you probably need to be like that after seeing some of the messages you ladies get, but truthfully even if I met all of your criteria (I don't, so it's a moot point anyway but ..) I'd skip past based on the assumption you'd be hard work socially if we met if you were like your profile.
But as has been said elsewhere I bet you're a pussycat really!   |
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"Aggressive? Nah.
Blunt and direct? Yep
I get why you probably need to be like that after seeing some of the messages you ladies get, but truthfully even if I met all of your criteria (I don't, so it's a moot point anyway but ..) I'd skip past based on the assumption you'd be hard work socially if we met if you were like your profile.
But as has been said elsewhere I bet you're a pussycat really! "
It's true Dan, I am a softie really and socially, I love a good gossip and a flirt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Reads like it's written by a woman that knows what she wants ...aggressive no ...direct to the point yes .....a woman that knows what she's wants is....awesome  |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"last line is a bit bossy but not aggressive.
I'm hoping I got the right balance. The amount of men who promised to ruin me before was tedious. "
might bossy up my profile then. i like sub guys and wanna get rid of the rubbish men. |
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"last line is a bit bossy but not aggressive.
I'm hoping I got the right balance. The amount of men who promised to ruin me before was tedious.
might bossy up my profile then. i like sub guys and wanna get rid of the rubbish men. "
I'll pass them on to you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's bloody fantastic...as someone who gets endless messages from guys who haven't read my profile - and I'm pretty direct- I take my fab hat off to you. Dies it cut the messages down ? |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"last line is a bit bossy but not aggressive.
I'm hoping I got the right balance. The amount of men who promised to ruin me before was tedious.
might bossy up my profile then. i like sub guys and wanna get rid of the rubbish men.
I'll pass them on to you. "
i'm going through a load on another site, when it ever loads (which it hardly does these days). 
but thanks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"there's nothing wrong with that OP
I changed mine a few weeks ago and now I don't get nearly as many numpties messaging me as I used to..."
Ooh it's a good one ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"there's nothing wrong with that OP
I changed mine a few weeks ago and now I don't get nearly as many numpties messaging me as I used to...
Ooh it's a good one !"
thanks! |
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"I think it's bloody fantastic...as someone who gets endless messages from guys who haven't read my profile - and I'm pretty direct- I take my fab hat off to you. Dies it cut the messages down ?"
It sort of defeats its own object. I've never had loads of messages but it doesn't stop the numpties and self entitled. We're all the same lying down, I only smoke five a day, my wife doesn't understand me, I want to serve you...ad nauseum. I do get to chat and meet some fantastic men but I think it does put the sort of man I like off a little. |
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"there's nothing wrong with that OP
I changed mine a few weeks ago and now I don't get nearly as many numpties messaging me as I used to..."
It is bloody good and funnily enough, we like exactly the same sort of bloke! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A bit also is not friendly ! in my opinion is always nice to greet the reader and thank them for passing by!
We can cut the crap with diplomacy in my view. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it really that aggressive? "
No.
It's assertive, free of fluffy bullshit & confident.
A large portion of the male population,
cannot handle confident women.
Which, you've already noticed anyway! |
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"Is it really that aggressive?
No I think it sets out exactly what you want. I think my first ever profile was similar."
I've tried all sorts of approaches over the years and once I realised that in general, profiles go unread, I now keep it simple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it really that aggressive?
No I think it sets out exactly what you want. I think my first ever profile was similar.
I've tried all sorts of approaches over the years and once I realised that in general, profiles go unread, I now keep it simple. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it really that aggressive? "
It's straight to the point which is something I like in a profile. If your profile has hurt someone's feelings..... well that is because they are a pussy. Simples  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only thing that strikes me as aggressive in your profile is the use of the word "pathetically"
Reading it out aloud, I found the first two sentences difficult to get into the flow of - I had to read them twice,
Otherwise I found it quite straightforward. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To me it makes you sound like shirley from eastenders except the none drinking part....i look for people i think will be fun to be around, im sure you are but this tells me your not....sorry but this doesnt read well for me
*puts on stab proof vest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did a man say that to you by any chance?
You certainly don't mince your words. You come across as a woman who knows what she wants and who wouldn't take any bullshit. Nothing wrong with that, but a lot of guys wouldn't be able to handle that!!!
I'm getting a lot of interest in men who regard themselves as sub and want me to take them on.
What I want is the complete opposite."
It's a little aggressive. If you are a pussy at then bring out the sweetness and light.
Personally I'm jaded with the "fierce" , "sassy" , independent, know what I want persona. Those things should be a given for anyone with self confidence and if you sweet, fun and playful it's much more attractive.
My 2 cents
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did a man say that to you by any chance?
You certainly don't mince your words. You come across as a woman who knows what she wants and who wouldn't take any bullshit. Nothing wrong with that, but a lot of guys wouldn't be able to handle that!!!
I'm getting a lot of interest in men who regard themselves as sub and want me to take them on.
What I want is the complete opposite."
Then why not say "not into sub men" |
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As single woman you have a different set of requirements of a profile to men or couples.
Like you say, you will be bombarded with ridiculous messages and part of the profile is to try to minimise them.
I'd suggest it might not put off the numpties as they'll either not read it, can't read, or they'll message regardless.
But it might put off the gem of a guy who you do want to message.
Rock and a hard place, I know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't say your profile is aggressive, but the chutzpah line suggests to me that the man will have to prove himself worthy. Almost a test. I'm not sure the confident, assertive kind of man you're after would find this an appealing prospect.
But, if you're profile is actually attracting the kind of men you like, then change nothing.
Charlie |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
I am going to sound like a pillock here but with a profile like that I wouldn't message even though it has lovely sentiments only as I found it difficult to read (my grammar isn't the best at all). Your first lines; "this" should be changed to 'a' and "that" should be changed to 'this'. Your use of a comma should be put before so in your last sentence, not before "not", imo. But I find it direct not aggressive.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see aggression.
It's straight to the point, which I like.
It should attract the kind of man who likes women who aren't girly, flowery topped and glittery.
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EXTREMELY
First and last sentences.
Live your life in DM's but not a site of them in any pictures.
You say "I'm interested in who you are, not what you have"
Yet you say little of who you actually are, and you think your best features are your legs and secondly your tits. - judging by the photos.
So what are you looking for? just getting your tits or legs shagged? or something more?
Only do social for 1st meet - nothing wrong with that per sa, great for safety. But who are you? really, who are you? Why would I or anyone meet you for a social in the first place?
If this is too blunt -well you did ask! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not aggressive at all but you do appear to be a little full of yourself.
That said, as long as it attracts the people that you want to attract, don't change it. |
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By *exybabyMan
over a year ago
Canterbury....ish |
"Is it really that aggressive? "
I get the feeling that if a chap had of posted his profile in the same context then he would have been 'slated' for what appears to be rather condescending. There is a very fine line between being confident and being arrogant.
Whilst i take with a pinch of salt the bluntness i also take on board that (as others have suggested) that it works for you...so for that i applaud you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is so unfair
The solution is that all men should stop messaging women and soon the women will be on their knees messaging the men and begging anyone for a f**k "
I just fab a few pics and send a wink...that usually has the desired effect, and also means they still have to message me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is so unfair
The solution is that all men should stop messaging women and soon the women will be on their knees messaging the men and begging anyone for a f**k "
We should try that for a day |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"This is so unfair
The solution is that all men should stop messaging women and soon the women will be on their knees messaging the men and begging anyone for a f**k
We should try that for a day "
I'm game |
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It comes across to us as a 'if you don't like me then fuck off' sort of profile. We tend to prefer profiles that are more warm, welcoming and fluffy so it wouldn't attract us.
It does set out what you want and should scare off the more timid of guys, though, so if that works for you then roll with it |
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"this is funny...
most of the women have endorsed it whilst most of the men say its too scary.... "
Isn't that the world we live in though... We're it's a positive thing for a man to be assertive and confident.. But when a woman is she's 'bossy' or a 'bitch' or aggressive
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"I think cus of the nature of how some men behave on here woman have to be blunt and ton the point..that said no fucker reads them anyway!!"
But is that the problem? I would say the profile doesn't put off the idiots, because they won't read it. The decent guys who she does want, might be put off?
MrB |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"Is it really that aggressive? "
I found the first line flippant but necessary. the rest is just meerly blunt that's all.
op what you need to think about is how the writing attracts certain people and does it match the people you are looking for. being blunt and to the point gives the impression to reader unless stated otherwise is that all you are interested is in sex and nothing more.
confusing profiles like mine can also attract the wrong person. (I'm working on it) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"this is funny...
most of the women have endorsed it whilst most of the men say its too scary....
Isn't that the world we live in though... We're it's a positive thing for a man to be assertive and confident.. But when a woman is she's 'bossy' or a 'bitch' or aggressive
"
very true...unfortunately  |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"It comes across to us as a 'if you don't like me then fuck off' sort of profile. We tend to prefer profiles that are more warm, welcoming and fluffy so it wouldn't attract us.
It does set out what you want and should scare off the more timid of guys, though, so if that works for you then roll with it "
But that doesn't matter does it, since she is not looking for couples |
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"this is funny...
most of the women have endorsed it whilst most of the men say its too scary....
Isn't that the world we live in though... We're it's a positive thing for a man to be assertive and confident.. But when a woman is she's 'bossy' or a 'bitch' or aggressive
very true...unfortunately "
Bit too general IMO. Some shallow weak men might be of that opinion, but lot's of people appreciate confident women and have a positive image of them.
MrB
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"It comes across to us as a 'if you don't like me then fuck off' sort of profile. We tend to prefer profiles that are more warm, welcoming and fluffy so it wouldn't attract us.
It does set out what you want and should scare off the more timid of guys, though, so if that works for you then roll with it
But that doesn't matter does it, since she is not looking for couples "
No but she IS looking for humans. And as humans we find it a bit abrasive |
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"I think cus of the nature of how some men behave on here woman have to be blunt and ton the point..that said no fucker reads them anyway!!"
Given no one reads them why bother writing one.
just put: Ya wanna fuc me and any picture.
Thinking about it might just try that: set up a false profile(like 50% on here) use those words and stick a picture of my elbow and a shoe and nickers just to see what happens.  |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"It comes across to us as a 'if you don't like me then fuck off' sort of profile. We tend to prefer profiles that are more warm, welcoming and fluffy so it wouldn't attract us.
It does set out what you want and should scare off the more timid of guys, though, so if that works for you then roll with it
But that doesn't matter does it, since she is not looking for couples
No but she IS looking for humans. And as humans we find it a bit abrasive "
OK fellow human(s); live long and prosper |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think cus of the nature of how some men behave on here woman have to be blunt and ton the point..that said no fucker reads them anyway!!
Given no one reads them why bother writing one.
just put: Ya wanna fuc me and any picture.
Thinking about it might just try that: set up a false profile(like 50% on here) use those words and stick a picture of my elbow and a shoe and nickers just to see what happens. "
jaded are we, by any chance |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages "
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth"
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages"
In the vain hope that the profile owner has a blank mind and desperate for a shag. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages"
You must have some idea from the content of the messages that are sent.
My guess is that they are agree some kind of sexual liaison.
Dirty bastards
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages"
because they can? you have quite a wide age range so that will probably account for it |
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages"
Really? That is astounding, I knew people spam mailed but there's no text, pics or anything. Crazy. |
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages"
Being 27 probably helps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages
Really? That is astounding, I knew people spam mailed but there's no text, pics or anything. Crazy."
I cant believe you are questioning it...men, given half a chance will message anyone, saying anything...its the scattergun approach...
they hope they will get lucky eventually |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I think cus of the nature of how some men behave on here woman have to be blunt and ton the point..that said no fucker reads them anyway!!
Given no one reads them why bother writing one.
just put: Ya wanna fuc me and any picture.
Thinking about it might just try that: set up a false profile(like 50% on here) use those words and stick a picture of my elbow and a shoe and nickers just to see what happens. "
And for the 'meet'; a Pair of rolled up socks and a wig; should be enough for most of the 'straight' guys here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think it's aggressive. I don't think it neccessarily reflects the woman I have met , just a few times , I'll give you that , so I won't proclaim to know you ..... but this profile it seems to me is telling the men folk what you don't want rather than what you do want ....we know it needs to be straighforward clear instructions for men ..... i am looking for xyz ... I'll write you one ?! |
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"I think cus of the nature of how some men behave on here woman have to be blunt and ton the point..that said no fucker reads them anyway!!
Given no one reads them why bother writing one.
just put: Ya wanna fuc me and any picture.
Thinking about it might just try that: set up a false profile(like 50% on here) use those words and stick a picture of my elbow and a shoe and nickers just to see what happens.
And for the 'meet'; a Pair of rolled up socks and a wig; should be enough for most of the 'straight' guys here "
ROFL
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"I think cus of the nature of how some men behave on here woman have to be blunt and ton the point..that said no fucker reads them anyway!!
Given no one reads them why bother writing one.
just put: Ya wanna fuc me and any picture.
Thinking about it might just try that: set up a false profile(like 50% on here) use those words and stick a picture of my elbow and a shoe and nickers just to see what happens.
jaded are we, by any chance "
Guess i must be -or just been on here too long |
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"
No but she IS looking for humans. And as humans we find it a bit abrasive
OK fellow human(s); live long and prosper
Why is there no Spock emoji on fab?! \\//,
Is the OP a Klingon? "
Careful - site rules clearly state we must only look for human company  |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"
No but she IS looking for humans. And as humans we find it a bit abrasive
OK fellow human(s); live long and prosper
Why is there no Spock emoji on fab?! \\//,
Is the OP a Klingon? "
Vulcan; I take it that you have not vacationed there |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I rather like profiles that are blunt and speak the truth im more than aggressive sometimes depends what lunatics you have to deal with. "
loving your username |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"
No but she IS looking for humans. And as humans we find it a bit abrasive
OK fellow human(s); live long and prosper
Why is there no Spock emoji on fab?! \\//,
Is the OP a Klingon?
Careful - site rules clearly state we must only look for human company "
That rather limits the search criteria for half-decent 'meets' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I rather like profiles that are blunt and speak the truth im more than aggressive sometimes depends what lunatics you have to deal with.
loving your username "
I will be reverting back to the devils daughter tuesday.
I only did that as it stops the morons messaging you they dont like having the label lol . |
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"Is it really that aggressive?
Scared me right off. 
And mine scared you as well lol
Yes but you're so delicious in real life. I wonder if there's a pattern emerging here...? "
Haha, why thank you. People do say when they meet me I'm totally different to my profile. |
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There's one thing this thread has highlighted..
Is just how widely different people are and that there is no point trying to write a profile in any way, other than how you want to.
As it will be interpretated in many different ways
That's a good thing i think |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Simple, honest and straight to the point. You've made it clear on what you want.
There's nothing wrong with being assertive. It just means that you have self respect.
"Shit happens but coffee helps" - yes it does Topsy. Yes it does! |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Topsy you know I love your bluntness and that's reflected perfectly in your profile which is concise, to the point and leaves no doubt as to what you're looking for - the only possible downside of it is it may well (and by the sounds of it does) attract the opposite of what you are actually seeking i.e. submissives looking for a Domme - so maybe add a line making it clear that's not what you are, or are looking for. (Know it has the line about needing the chutzpah but you may need to make the whole sub thing clearer).
Certainly wouldn't put me off contacting/meeting you |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
I like your profile. Straight forward and no need for anything more. I also get guys looking for me to Domme but I am sub.
I also totally get that you want intelligent conversation with a person first. I do think your pics are great and very stylish. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why start your profile on such a negative note? It is abrupt, and really rather patronising. Like many women and couples, you're concentrating so much more on putting off those you don't want rather than on attracting those you do want. You say you are "a little intimidating" but the people that've met you say you're a sweetheart. Perhaps reflect on what is this persona you are projecting, how much of it is you and how much of it is plain reaction to the type of correspondence you should be simply ignoring. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only problem I can see with your profile is you don't state wether it's acceptable for your meets to paint their nails, I say this because it's preferable for a man to paint his toenails rather than have to look at the ghastly things. |
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"Why start your profile on such a negative note? It is abrupt, and really rather patronising. Like many women and couples, you're concentrating so much more on putting off those you don't want rather than on attracting those you do want. You say you are "a little intimidating" but the people that've met you say you're a sweetheart. Perhaps reflect on what is this persona you are projecting, how much of it is you and how much of it is plain reaction to the type of correspondence you should be simply ignoring."
Ta. There is only one person on this thread I've met and she's a woman. I've been turned down from socials several times because they see me as intimidating. |
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"Soooooo if it bothering you and it's not having the desired effect...... change it? "
Not really, I was just asking for opinions and I'm always tweaking it around, it's had many incarnations over the years |
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I'd say read it as though it was someone else's profile. Then decide would you want to meet that person.
If that was written by a couple then we would probably not message as it comes across not as aggressive but a little negative.
Lots of don'ts, little to hint at what turns you on or even what you would find attractive other than taller than 5'10.
You could easily rehash and put a more positive spin.
But it entirely your choice if it's getting results don't change a thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's hard to get the balance right between filtering out those who are not suitable and coming across as stand-offish. That i sympathise having tried that balancing act in our profile, and with great success. If I were a single guy I personally would be too scared to message your profile. But I admit I am a bit sensitive. Only you will really know if your profile is attracting the men you want to meet,
Mrs |
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By *ola.Woman
over a year ago
Just where I need to be. |
I do feel it lacks any of your personality.The wearing of make up boots is your outer layer, where does it show your inner side. You come across as a bit of a grumpy woman and after meeting you I can say you are far from it. If you are after strong character men there has to be something in your profile that they can glimpse at to show you are not that hard veneer. You have a warm and friendly personality and your profile doesn't reflect that.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems to me that all women are inundated with messages
it seems tome that that is what some women want you to think....
in reality it is far from the truth
Depends on the profile I guess. As mine is now I've still had 347 in 4 days. I mean... why do people message blank pages"
I get the same. Very weird men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only problem I can see with your profile is you don't state wether it's acceptable for your meets to paint their nails, I say this because it's preferable for a man to paint his toenails rather than have to look at the ghastly things. "
Why not just tell him to keep his socks on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it really that aggressive? "
Its blunt, but its specific and to be honest you're only going to make less people message you which isn't necessarily a bad thing.
The way I look at my profile is I'm a take it or leave it kind of deal and it's clear that yours is the same. No issues with that you're just simply stating your preferences.
It just means that there are no false pretences and effort is required. That's one way to decrease "less favourable" encounters.
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