FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Don't take it personally

Don't take it personally

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By *onforming_deviant OP Woman over a year ago

Hull

Hi there everyone (only friendly peeps I've had enough of ass hats!)

So... Does anyone struggle with sense of self?

I feel like im learning alot about who I am through convos on this site...

What I want through the frustrations of empty convo...

And recently... Trying something new which was sexually liberating.

And im learning alot about how to be judgmental in order to avoid those who seem to only be on the planet to take advantage and serve themselves.

Everything with a pinch of salt... The innumerable amount of misc messages sent when you first join (even before you put pics up).

The guys who ask for face pics straight away but don't send any themselves or have more than "ask me" on their profile.

The misc "are you free tonight" "love your ass" "hiya gorgeous" messages.

The repeated message sent a few days apart from the same guy you have been ignoring for a month..

The guys who ask you to chat on kik... Then just want pics cause they are laid in bed with their cock in hand.

So I havent been blocking enough people and today I get a message on kik... No previous convo (so might be a douche... But give him a chance)

"what's happened to your ass"

'come thing fun and exciting'

"Face pic"

'no... Convo...?'

"Sket"

"Cant get a boyfriend so you turn into a slag"

Now I wonder... How does my profile translate into other people's judgements... I know I shouldnt care but bollock man!

If my online presence isn't right... Im not going to get chance to meet the people I want to meet and arseh*les will continue to be a problem.

Feeling overwhelmed and in need of reassurance

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By *orum TrollWoman over a year ago

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nothing to do with your profile. pretty much all guys talk shit to us on here.

glad i've been in relationships prior to this site coz i'd find it really frustrating if i had new stuff i'd want to try and had to rely on half the flakes and guys who talk out their ass.

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By *orum TrollWoman over a year ago

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well i do have new tuff i wanna try actually, i'm patient though.

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By *onforming_deviant OP Woman over a year ago

Hull

Thanks just worried about my online presence and definitely took an idiot's choice of words personally

I like fab though about 10? of people are decent.. 30? deviant and the rest.... less said the better haha

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By *orum TrollWoman over a year ago

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if someone doesn't actually know you they can't be personal with you. so definitely ignore anyone like that.

i'd say the majority of people are ok really, i'm just wanting something better than most guys offer on here now and outgrowing fab.

like regular meets, only ever had 2 guys offer that to me. one is attached and the other is fucking the whole site...

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By *orum TrollWoman over a year ago

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by regular i mean more than once a month. ideally i'd like sex every day but not with randoms and the occasional regular shoved in there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Thanks just worried about my online presence and definitely took an idiot's choice of words personally

I like fab though about 10? of people are decent.. 30? deviant and the rest.... less said the better haha"

You have a few good verifications so I wouldn't worry too much about finding genuine people ...

It's the others that are the problem and if you don't like what they are saying, just block and move on

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By *ischief ManagedCouple over a year ago

manchester

Your profile is fine it is self explanatory if they cant read thats there problem ...

P.s nice jeans

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Whatever has" happened to your ass" you must tell other girls the secret because it looks very good. If some men can't handle a polite no or not interested then they are not the kind of people to be meeting anyway. Respect and manners go a long way (both ways).

Don't worry about it block and move on

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By *herbert fountainWoman over a year ago

Hanley

I use messages like that as a filter. If they can't be respectful then they are obviously not someone I want to meet so instead of getting upset I am grateful that they showed their true colours.

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By *emel9Man over a year ago

West Midlands

So...as a man I'd say your profile and online persona is cool..it's different to lots of other profiles, whilst saying a bit about who you are and what you want...Thumbs up

I think there are many fake and sad people in this world....they aren't just online or on Fabs..it's just easier for them to converse here because it can be faceless, or fake faced.

You are normal to be concerned, and it shows you are genuine and have soul.

As I'm sure you know, will have been advised, or will soon learn... These are pinch of salt people. The key is to allow your skin to become thick enough to ignore them, but not so thick as to miss out on the genuine ones...that is a skill.

As a genuine swinger, and solo flying guy on here, they probably do the genuine ones like me more damage than anyone else...

But hey...if someone could invent an idiot filter at the time of signing up to a website, they'd be a billionaire by now lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't let men that have no idea about this site or arguably even women in general get to you. The men that send shit messages or get abusive are almost always the unverified ones moaning they can't get a meet.

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By *onforming_deviant OP Woman over a year ago

Hull

"if someone doesn't actually know you they can't be personal with you. so definitely ignore anyone like that.

This is definitely something to remember :D Thankyou :D

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By *onforming_deviant OP Woman over a year ago

Hull

"instead of getting upset I am grateful that they showed their true colours."

I used choice words which effectively relayed this message :D

Thankyou for saying it, it reassures me I responded appropriately

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By *aughty_nymphWoman over a year ago

Cheltenham

Happens to me every day. Hence why my

Block list is so huge and why I hardly

Meet anyone

It's nothing personal xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Thanks just worried about my online presence and definitely took an idiot's choice of words personally

I like fab though about 10? of people are decent.. 30? deviant and the rest.... less said the better haha"

I wouldn't let an idiots comments bother you. From reading your profile and your verifications you come across as a confident and lovely person. Intelligent and definitely seem like you can hold a decent conversation from your post. And for one if it were me I'd definitely like to get talking too you and finding more about you. And as some have pointed out it can be difficult to connect online sometimes just take this one fool as a bad experience and move in to better ones

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By *andomfodCouple over a year ago

walsall

Seems like it's another case of someone taking rejection like a child. Don't give them the attention

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Seems like it's another case of someone taking rejection like a child. Don't give them the attention

Bang on perfect

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"nothing to do with your profile. pretty much all guys talk shit to us on here.

hahaha,,very true

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By *onforming_deviant OP Woman over a year ago

Hull

"Seems like it's another case of someone taking rejection like a child. Don't give them the attention

You may be right

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"if someone doesn't actually know you they can't be personal with you. so definitely ignore anyone like that.

I agree

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't let strangers on a sex site bother me in the slightest. This isn't real life for me.

In my opinion, the majority of people who say offensive comments are keyboard warriors and would be pathetic cowards if you came across them in real life, and I'm talking both men and women.

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By *irginieWoman over a year ago

Near Marlborough

"instead of getting upset I am grateful that they showed their true colours.

I used choice words which effectively relayed this message :D

Thankyou for saying it, it reassures me I responded appropriately

Over the past few years a handful of people have touched my life from this site and for that I shall be always happy.

There have also been a handful that, for whatever reason, feel that my profile is their business. They obviously mistake me for someone who gives a fuck.

I do hope your experience doesn't cause you to second guess your profile. I like it. You sound fun, and in control, and totally sorted........ great pictures too. As long as this makes you happy then it's a good place to be.

V xxxx

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By *onforming_deviant OP Woman over a year ago

Hull

"As long as this makes you happy then it's a good place to be.

V xxxx

*High five* XxxxX

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