FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Ghosting

Ghosting

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

I'd met a guy off fab last week. Clicked straight away and he seemed perfect for me. Met for coffee and chatted for a whole afternoon. Continued to chat on kik and arranged for me to go to his tonight for fun. chatted up until last night. I had a babysitter boooed but she cancelled on me so I let him know via kik at lunchtime.... by 5pm I noticed the messaged hadnt been delivered or read and his fab profile had gone. What the hell?! I'm so glad my sitter cancelled. Why just disappear after meeting and chatting? If you've had a change of heart why not just text to say so??

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

All the time. You'll have to get used to it because its going to happen again.

Luckily most of the men on here are reliable, but there are always those who aren't, or who bit off more than they could chew, or whose wives found their profiles. People come and go, and we just have to make sure the ones we meet aren't the cowardly kind.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Loads of people had had this happen to them, it's a hazard that goes with the fab territory. A case of fantasy vs reality for the chap involved probably.

Your best bet......forget about it quickly, it's unlikely to have been anything you did or said. Move on to the next guy. Look for the verified fellas with a track record of actually turning up.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *eaded_BazMan over a year ago

Truro

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "

It seems you've had a lucky escape OP but yes it's a shame there are too many people without manners or common decency any more. Sure you will bounce back with knobs on. Certainly, would seem like his loss. He may have a legitimate reason but as you say why just disappear without so much as a goodbye or sorry. X

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

On my way to skipton to help a fab lady out!!

I've found that couples do the same to single guys.... chatting away, arrange to meet and then when it comes to confirming nearer the day/evening I've been blocked or member no longer on the site,...

Reality vs fantasy I guess.....

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It happens

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *oletiCouple over a year ago

Doncaster

It's got so good for us, we even place bets on the ones who will UNLOS. The amount of sexual forfeits just get out of control!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Since you already met him and clicked, l can't see him being a time waster? Perhaps he thought you were time wasting with the baby sitter? lt happens. l got called a time waster for not wanting to meet at 3am.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "

I've had similar happen to me more than once and I will never understand why someone would do that. They spend ages telling you what they want to do, tell you personal things about their life, arrange to meet then disappear on the day!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this?

Exactly, I'm flummoxed when I think back to what he shared during our social to turn simply disappear. He was verified as well... i don't contact unverified at all. And he hasn't even got my message about the babysitter yet.

Very good advice to move on and forget it and also reassuring (but exasperating) to know this is an unfortunate common occurrence on fab. X

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Since you already met him and clicked, l can't see him being a time waster? Perhaps he thought you were time wasting with the baby sitter? lt happens. l got called a time waster for not wanting to meet at 3am."

He'd left before she cancelled the meet.

There is a fine line about time wasting - he'd already turned up, she cancelled the meet etc etc. But if the babysitter hadn't cancelled she may well have been left on her tod at the meet up site.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

maybe something has happened to him - phone lost or taken ill - or simply panicked as you got on 'too' well - whatever - this happens a lot on here it seems

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ragon-tattMan over a year ago

runcorn

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this?

Very good advice to move on and forget it and also reassuring (but exasperating) to know this is an unfortunate common occurrence on fab. X"

We're not all bad,don't beat yourself up about it, its just something that got in the way..getting caught is probably the most likley as you say he was varified..im beginning to see how important it is to get a few varied posts, hopefully the next few events will provide that

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "

Yes I have experienced something similar at it was a weekend I had to change a whole load of plans around and an hour before she just disappeared account gone blocked on whatsapp the lot.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *andi_shopWoman over a year ago

rotherham

As the kik message didn't get delivered I'm guessing they got caught out and had to delete apps really quickly, unfortunately it happens I'm afraid

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Had similar

Things happen to

Me, single ladies, couples & guys when I had a couples profile. Very frustrating when you were looking forward to a social or a fun meet

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "
I'm sure you are not short of offers. It's NSA after all maybe you were coming on too strong.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ishopstippleMan over a year ago

Purley

He bottled it for some reason you will never know. maybe anxiety, cheating, fear, or just a fantastist . Dont worry about it, its his loss.

I would thank the universe that the babysitter had to cancel. Otherwise you would have had the expense and your time wasted.

Move on there are plenty of genuine guys on here.

Hope you feel better after your Rant

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ackDMissMorganCouple over a year ago

Halifax

"He bottled it for some reason you will never know. maybe anxiety, cheating, fear, or just a fantastist . Dont worry about it, its his loss.

I would thank the universe that the babysitter had to cancel. Otherwise you would have had the expense and your time wasted.

Move on there are plenty of genuine guys on here.

Hope you feel better after your Rant

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I do feel better after a good rant thankyou everyone

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I was just reading a interesting article on this subject I hadn't heard the term before seems it's a common thing these days everywhere.

At least you hadn't got more personal, that hurts more.

Better luck next time.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We've had this happen a few times and has put us off arranging meets for the most part. (clubs are our favoured thing now)

One time a "couple" (probably a sad single male) didn't show for a meet (we'd booked a hotel too) then a few weeks later set up another account, same pix and approached us about a meet. Quickly reported them for being fake.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I suspect this being a case of the wife/girlfriend finding the phone... Men don't realize suddenly texting all the time while at home and suddenly spending hours in the bathroom leads to your wife/girlfriend getting suspicious.... Women are very cunning like that

He already met for the social and was ready to get the goodies.... So it's not your fault Op , unfortunately most of the time handsome and charming guys are attached... It's just part of this silly place we call Fab

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We've had this happen a few times and has put us off arranging meets for the most part. (clubs are our favoured thing now)

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *layfulserfMan over a year ago

Northolt

It happens far too often

Ive been in contact with couples who have been really keen, we have agreed a date and time and then nothing.

One couple blocked me on the day of the meet without a word... another couple took directions,my phone number and were leaving only never to arrive.

Other couples have been great... they have messaged to postpone.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ndigo40Woman over a year ago

secret town

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "

No never

Don't get angry get even

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *teveanddebsCouple over a year ago

Norwich

At a guess I'd say his wife found out.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *hy-totCouple over a year ago

Skellow

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "
maybe his wife came back so he could not accom

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Meets are like gold dust - and looking at your pics, worth more than that. I can't imagine why any single male would 'evaporate' having arranged a meet. Must need his head examining.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *weet medicineWoman over a year ago

Kesgrave

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? maybe his wife came back so he could not accom "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *weet medicineWoman over a year ago

Kesgrave

"Hi all, just wanted to have a little rant and to hear any wise words about being ghosted.

Quite bewildered and a bit angry to be honest. No need for it! Anyone else experienced this? "

Suspecdt his partner found out. If it was the case consider it a lucky escape. My last meet (since removed my veri) was gorgeous charming & we clicked so i met him for a more intimate meet. Only to then have his v peeved off partner who had found out try & hunt me down

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Looking at your profile he was clearly an idiot.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ostafunMan over a year ago

near ipswich

thats the trouble with kik anomonous i always ask to whatsapp if someones not prepared to give thier number i put them down as a time waster

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *layer oneMan over a year ago

mirfield

Am sure there's a "been there got the tee shirt" out therefor the amount of times this has happened to me I even had one that denied that we met on her single account after I sent a txt on her couple account

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *reenleavesCouple over a year ago

North Wales

We very rarely meet new people through fab and yet it's happened to us. This is why we tend to spend a long time chatting online over a few weeks before meeting up. We tend to find those who are likely to no-show will give up early on.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

» Add a new message to this topic