Always been fairly shy but we have had some great times over the years. But it seems of late had a real lack of confidence when speaking to people at clubs/parties, we know what we want to do but find it hard to just say it, hope this is just a phase 
Any thoughts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Drink more , that should help"
Drinking more is not the way to go....
From experience, we have avoided people who have appeared to have had too much to drink, as there is often unpleasant side effects to alcohol....Or people being that d*unk, that they are unable to play or consent adequately.
No thanks |
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We're the same. For us it's that first step of starting the conversation and then if we get past that point the 'do you fancy a play' question. We're the same with sending messages on here (no problem once we get playing though!)., |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Always been fairly shy but we have had some great times over the years. But it seems of late had a real lack of confidence when speaking to people at clubs/parties, we know what we want to do but find it hard to just say it, hope this is just a phase
Any thoughts? "
Im struggling with this right now... I can not approach anyone for play.... its ridiculous.... my confidence has run off somewhere unless Im chaperoning a friend... then Im little miss chatty and get the guy for them...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi been on here quite a whole now but just can't seem to get a meet or anything
I can accommodate as own my own house so don't know what's wrong
Any help pls  |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
"I find it hard some times....I tend to stick with someone chatty let them do most of the talking till I relax more."
I also message people I like the look of who have out a meet up for a club night in advance so there's someone there I can say hello to. |
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"Drink more , that should help and never use that... Drinking should never be needed to swing "
We both rarely drink due to preference and medical reasons, much prefer to remember what we get upto  |
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"I find it hard some times....I tend to stick with someone chatty let them do most of the talking till I relax more.
I also message people I like the look of who have out a meet up for a club night in advance so there's someone there I can say hello to."
Tried that too but to not great effect  |
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Ok here is our experience from two days ago.....
Playing pool and offering a game of doubles...not really any joy.
Complimenting outfits.... Mixed results but on the whole a good conversation starter, especially lady to lady.
Asking if it's OK to sit near someone, ps hi I'm xxxxx.... Meet a lovely couple doing this, had a great chat and was very enjoyable.
Playing in a room.... Not much joy but has worked for us before
Chatting outside a room about how busy it was.... Opened up a whole conversation and had some fantastic fun.
Just chatting at the bar whilst waiting to get a drink.... Some lovely conversations.
None of these are planned just opportunities to mingle. We never expect others to respond or want to play with us, but find most people are happy to chat and engage in none committal conversation.
If we are not sure if they are interested we'll say we are going to play and that of they want to join us they are more than welcome.
Getting more alcohol is not a great idea.
In the end the worst that can happen is someone says no thanks, or we don't want to play with you, or just ignore you.
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