FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > ignorance??
ignorance??
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing? "
I imangine that it's often not that they've changed their mind as such, just lost interest...drifted off
or if there's a lot of online play, perhaps that was really all they were interested in... |
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How many of these threads have their been? Just because you chat a bit doesn't mean you're in with a chance.
Women get far more messages than men and don't take every guy seriously. And that's because most guys who message us have no intention of meeting.
They want endless messages or wank chat. And that's not what a lot of us want. Did you offer/arrange to meet for a social? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. "
Well there's probably hundreds of guys who can't get a reply at all so you ain't doing too bad  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I understand women get a hell of alot to be honest font think I've had a message first. But yes I always off to chat for abit meet for social no pressures as and when. I feel that 90% of the guys have cause some of the more genuine guys alot of issues. To be fair the last thing I want to do is masterbate over a cam to someone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just feel abit of decency on the female or couples behalf saying were not interested than just ignorance.... must be the rudest of all traits"
The FAQ of the site states no reply means no thanks. Even if you have been chatting previously. If you reply with thanks but no thanks you either get asked "but why" or worse you get a ton of abuse. |
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"I feel that 90% of the guys have cause some of the more genuine guys alot of issues"
And how is it that someone who is in the top 10% can't stand out from the crowd of crap?
Don't blame other guys for your failings. The brutal truth is your messages can't be interesting enough to keep someone hooked. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"no pressures as and when.
So you're just another guy who says he wants to meet and does nothing about it. "
I've not had the chance to meet but if I say I will meet I will no point being in here if your not. I'm not a picture collector. And they conversation csnt get started for it to be stale if I'm honest I'm not blaming other guys for my failings nor am I taking it personal I'm just stating that go on cam and it's just wanking blokes everywhere. I haven't posted a 'dick Pic' on my profile not because I'm embarrassed etc but that's all majority of lads profiles are and I can't imagine a woman goes ooo that's diff from the other 400 unless it's like a bath loafer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP imagine you are in a night club, and you are chatting to someone, after a few minutes there appears to be no chemistry, do you expect a formal "I have no interest in progressing with this because I find you unattractive" or does the conversation just dry up and you move on?
I am far more comfortable with the latter...
We have had some really snotty messages after saying no to some guys. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The other thing to be aware of is morst ladies and couples to a certain extent have their pick on here...so can be very very choosy... if there is anything and I mean anything that says "no" we generally just clam up and often block... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When this happens, just think it was a guy you were talking to...
Try to message people that have a meet posted and try to post a meet yourself.
This will get the active people to contact you and vice versa
Good luck |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"OP imagine you are in a night club, and you are chatting to someone, after a few minutes there appears to be no chemistry, do you expect a formal "I have no interest in progressing with this because I find you unattractive" or does the conversation just dry up and you move on?
I am far more comfortable with the latter...
We have had some really snotty messages after saying no to some guys."
Exactly this |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
Just as an example, I speak to guys, I sign into my laptop when I get up in the morning whilst getting ready for work.
I don't have time to chat but some send messages and I think, I'll try and answer in the evening, but then of course by the time I get home of an evening I have forgotten about it as other messages have come in, so sometimes it is not always deliberate |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just as an example, I speak to guys, I sign into my laptop when I get up in the morning whilst getting ready for work.
I don't have time to chat but some send messages and I think, I'll try and answer in the evening, but then of course by the time I get home of an evening I have forgotten about it as other messages have come in, so sometimes it is not always deliberate "
Honest question..... is it fun answering all these messages? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Try sending a face pic with your first message and don't take too long to discuss a meet unless they want just to chat."
I always do no point talking to a stranger. If I get no reply from that then fair dues but if I've had a good chat then nothing g just abit frustrating |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"Just as an example, I speak to guys, I sign into my laptop when I get up in the morning whilst getting ready for work.
I don't have time to chat but some send messages and I think, I'll try and answer in the evening, but then of course by the time I get home of an evening I have forgotten about it as other messages have come in, so sometimes it is not always deliberate
Honest question..... is it fun answering all these messages? "
No, not really, as most are saying Hi how has your week been so far? Probably why they get forgotten about between 7.30am and 5.30 pm (hope that helps someone) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just as an example, I speak to guys, I sign into my laptop when I get up in the morning whilst getting ready for work.
I don't have time to chat but some send messages and I think, I'll try and answer in the evening, but then of course by the time I get home of an evening I have forgotten about it as other messages have come in, so sometimes it is not always deliberate
Honest question..... is it fun answering all these messages?
No, not really, as most are saying Hi how has your week been so far? Probably why they get forgotten about between 7.30am and 5.30 pm (hope that helps someone) "
So what sort of things instead of small talk would get your intrest if you had briefly spoke?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I get no reply from that then fair dues but if I've had a good chat then nothing g just abit frustrating"
Thats just the way it is, happens both ways as was said earlier...
No point in getting pissed off by it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
So what sort of things instead of small talk would get your intrest if you had briefly spoke??"
Photographic evidence that they are a 6 foot four Tyson Beckford lookalike with a 12 inch cock.
Who had clearly read our profile. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I get no reply from that then fair dues but if I've had a good chat then nothing g just abit frustrating
Thats just the way it is, happens both ways as was said earlier...
No point in getting pissed off by it."
Not pissed but if I was doing something wrong or was a particular thing wouldn't mind changing it and yeah sorry don't meet to any criteria baring always read profiles before pics |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"Just as an example, I speak to guys, I sign into my laptop when I get up in the morning whilst getting ready for work.
I don't have time to chat but some send messages and I think, I'll try and answer in the evening, but then of course by the time I get home of an evening I have forgotten about it as other messages have come in, so sometimes it is not always deliberate
Honest question..... is it fun answering all these messages?
No, not really, as most are saying Hi how has your week been so far? Probably why they get forgotten about between 7.30am and 5.30 pm (hope that helps someone)
So what sort of things instead of small talk would get your intrest if you had briefly spoke??"
Well I think there is something in my profile that makes them want to message me in the first place, so why not mention it, and messages that just say 'nice pics' is a no go either, as I would sound bloody egotisical by replying 'Gee thanks!' How should I reply to a message that just says 'I love your pics' ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" How should I reply to a message that just says 'I love your pics' ? "
I ususlly reply by saying "Thats the best line I have ever heard, be round to your place in 5, get the lube warmed up" |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
" How should I reply to a message that just says 'I love your pics' ?
I ususlly reply by saying "Thats the best line I have ever heard, be round to your place in 5, get the lube warmed up""
Lol I am a sarcastic bitch at the best of times, I fear that would just go 'whoosh'  |
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"no pressures as and when.
So you're just another guy who says he wants to meet and does nothing about it.
I've not had the chance to meet but if I say I will meet I will no point being in here if your not. I'm not a picture collector. And they conversation csnt get started for it to be stale if I'm honest I'm not blaming other guys for my failings nor am I taking it personal I'm just stating that go on cam and it's just wanking blokes everywhere. I haven't posted a 'dick Pic' on my profile not because I'm embarrassed etc but that's all majority of lads profiles are and I can't imagine a woman goes ooo that's diff from the other 400 unless it's like a bath loafer"
How did cock cams come into it?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just feel abit of decency on the female or couples behalf saying were not interested than just ignorance.... must be the rudest of all traits"
that's pretty mcuh this site really.
men express interest in us all the time then they go quiet, it's just how 'chatting' on here is.
unless you take the internet out of the equation pretty quickly then things aren't gonna advance as fast as you want them to. people are gonna drop off the face of the earth, coz you (and me too) are just another random in a sea of randoms who mean nothing to anybody else until you've had good sex and got some kind of rapport going. |
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Its a fab thing that happens to all, whether single guys, fems or couples. There is an initial sugar rush, with all the excitement that goes with the craic / crack, anticipation, flirting, flattery etc and then the reality of daily life cuts in: work, kids, available time, insecurities, second thoughts etc. People achieve a level of excitement that meets their needs and is sufficient to exceed the effort and concerns and doubts to follow it through. Nothing personal bud, its life, suck it up and keep fishing. Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing? "
NO one likes a moaner! |
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"I just feel abit of decency on the female or couples behalf saying were not interested than just ignorance.... must be the rudest of all traits"
Ignorance is both ways
Including the arrange the social and then be online 2 minutes after you should be at the venue.. and don't bother to message some lame excuse!
So just like I have to ...
You need to suck it up and either carry on or give up and leave.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing? "
Maybe there's no chemistry, they don't like your banter or maybe they have lives? Maybe they have no intention of meeting and just like the chase?
Either way they have decided they don't want to meet at this stage, so fuck 'em off! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
"
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though. "
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though.
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol"
You're a very honest poster... the forum police is watching you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just feel abit of decency on the female or couples behalf saying were not interested than just ignorance.... must be the rudest of all traits"
You may feel like and it would be good if people could accept being told, many don't and want to know the in, out of Why or get abusive.
Conversation die off you've no idea how many someone's talking to it's not worth getting upset about
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though.
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol"
Not if the only one you wanted to remotely meet goes quiet on you, no. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though.
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol
Not if the only one you wanted to remotely meet goes quiet on you, no. "
Let's hope he's reading this... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though.
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol
Not if the only one you wanted to remotely meet goes quiet on you, no.
Let's hope he's reading this..."
He = They
Nope. I couldn't care less, wouldn't give 'em the opportunity to meet me now anyway. Plenty more to go after. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though.
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol
Not if the only one you wanted to remotely meet goes quiet on you, no.
Let's hope he's reading this...
He = They
Nope. I couldn't care less, wouldn't give 'em the opportunity to meet me now anyway. Plenty more to go after."
Lucky you lol. But that's a difference. Actually, as a guy (although partly due to my age, location and preferences) there simply isn't... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, it's not just you. It's happened to me a few times. Not just after a few messages but after days of chat. It's a bit annoying but that's Fab. Women get so many opportunities that they don't need to care what guys think. Of course the flip side of this is many guys, having experienced this sort of stuff, feel no obligation to be any nicer to women if they get a better offer having already arranged to meet. It's not right but we reap what we sow...
It's not a 'female' thing on here. This has happened to me several times, as I guess guys get other opportunities/priorities too. I don't go on then to take it out on others though.
Neither do I but clearly some guys do. Of course if you're getting 50 messages a day from other guys it must sooth the pain (compared to say...getting none) lol
Not if the only one you wanted to remotely meet goes quiet on you, no.
Let's hope he's reading this...
He = They
Nope. I couldn't care less, wouldn't give 'em the opportunity to meet me now anyway. Plenty more to go after.
Lucky you lol. But that's a difference. Actually, as a guy (although partly due to my age, location and preferences) there simply isn't..."
I meant in the real world, pal. There's hardly any to go after on here, that meet preference and are respectful enough for me to want to meet them 
Fab doesn't account for 100% of my sex life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing? "
There are a tiny , tiny , tiny percentage of men who make any effort on here at all. We are pretty certain they just hope for a shag with minimal mental input .
Even those who fit our bill and whom we try to engage in a conversation by and large make no effort and it becomes like pulling teeth trying to drag a chemical connection from them. Very often we say after 20 stilted messages : thanks but we will leave it here now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing?
There are a tiny , tiny , tiny percentage of men who make any effort on here at all. We are pretty certain they just hope for a shag with minimal mental input .
Even those who fit our bill and whom we try to engage in a conversation by and large make no effort and it becomes like pulling teeth trying to drag a chemical connection from them. Very often we say after 20 stilted messages : thanks but we will leave it here now "
So true. I don't even bother saying thanks as I feel they've wasted enough of my time already.
Id like to think they can interpret me deleting their messages without a response, as a 'no longer interested'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing? "
It happens to us too......just accept people have other priorities or might have changed their minds |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only person who can get a few messages out of people then the conversation drops into the abyss. I always send a face pic then get a few replies after etc all goes well and boom nothing?
I don't feel my profile is the worst defo not the best. I like to think i can hold a conversation and attentive within said convo but seem to be getting pie of alot.
If I got a reply saying nah had a change of mind love your not for me fine but why keep coming online etc chat then nothing?
It happens to us too......just accept people have other priorities or might have changed their minds "
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think nothing more of it and move on 